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"I'd go with when it's making you feel not valued rather than a number. " In addition to what I said above, This too! | |||
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"I'd go with when it's making you feel not valued rather than a number. " Well put! | |||
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"I'd go with when it's making you feel not valued rather than a number. In addition to what I said above, This too! " I'll second that or am I thirding it? Anyway you get the point. | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " I'd say same people cancel twice would go on my block list probably. I've never had a meet from here, but I didn't give up yet. It's a new account, so I'm here longer than my profile states. Probably if this profile ends up stale for a long time, than I give up. No third time charm... | |||
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"It depends on lots of things. And who it is. Some reasons are extremely genuine and valid, shit happens and life does get in the way. Would be nice if I'm in that position the other person were understanding about it. But some people are stupidly flakey and don't have any care for how it impacts the person they are cancelling on. Cancel on a whim or at the slightest hint of another offer etc. " This. | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " Rule of 3 sounds good to me. | |||
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"Twice, then block and move on. Valid reason or not. This should be fun, not a head f*ck x" exactly | |||
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"Honestly, depends on the person. If it's someone I've talked to for a long time and they can turn me on (not easy!) then I would still attempt to meet. Others though, if they turn me down once, I'm pretty much done." Sheesh. Much as I hate to admit it, and agreeing is boooring, this nails it for me as well. | |||
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"If they've let me know they are cancelling I'll keep trying to re-arrange if they want to, life does have a habit of getting in the way. If they can't even be bothered to let me know they are cancelling, once and I'm done with them." Agree! If it’s no show that’s it, done. Last minute cancel and messing me around, done. Cancel with a real valid reason sure, of course another chance - but that’s it. I absolutely hate my time being wasted | |||
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"Not cancelling but I have someone who says they want a repeat meet, but every time I ask if they are free they say no sorry they can't because of XYZ. I know damn fine they don't want a repeat meet but I keep asking because FFS they should grow a pair and just say no. " I’d love to hear other’s view on this. I also get annoyed when someone keeps saying they want to meet again but never seem to actually want to agree to a date, just chat endlessly. | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " I hear you! Same thing here, repeatedly cancelled by various people. It's unbelievable, but like you say always genuine reasons you couldn't possibly challenge or call BS on but you know they can't all be true. I'm axing one later, I'm just waiting on what I know is going to happen. Used to have a three strikes rule but now it's ..fuck me around a second time you're gone. My child free time is mine to use wisely, not let someone else fuck up. So if they cancel me the day before that goes massively against them. I'll axe them for one strike if I think they knew sooner and could have given more notice. I had three things go tits up weekend just gone. | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " I wouldn't give someone an opportunity to rearrange but if cancelled twice then I'd be thinking they just want a pen pal or some attention and wouldn't waste anymore of my time | |||
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"Honestly, depends on the person. If it's someone I've talked to for a long time and they can turn me on (not easy!) then I would still attempt to meet. Others though, if they turn me down once, I'm pretty much done." Actually, this for me too. If I (and he actually) had a rule set in stone I'd have never met one of my absolute favourite people... life kept getting in the way for us both and we each cancelled on the other. | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " I'm not sure why they are cancelling on you but even with a valid excuse its not good enough, value your time and block them its harsh i know but its the only way. | |||
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"For my special friends, as many times as they need, we are together for the long haul Everyone else....Once." Special friends are different agree with that one. New friends what I wrote. | |||
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"For my special friends, as many times as they need, we are together for the long haul Everyone else....Once. Special friends are different agree with that one. New friends what I wrote." | |||
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"Do you let someone cancel before you give up hope? Even when very very valid reasons, how long do you hold out hope you'll meet someone? 3 cancels? No meets in a month? Its wearing me down being repeat cancelled on by multiple people and I need a rule. " Once and once only. | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. " If it is making you miserable and full of dread, maybe it isn't a meet you really want? | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. " I think for me, if I felt that way I'd want to express it. Otherwise it could set a precedent of accepting a dynamic you aren't happy with. | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. " I’d say that you should probably cut your loses now. Even if it does go ahead, what faith will you have in subsequent meets? Are you wanting to meet him because you want to or just for a level of closure on this issue? | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. If it is making you miserable and full of dread, maybe it isn't a meet you really want?" I feel bad cutting it off because it is a very very good reason. But idk. Just feel like a mug either way at this point. | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I think for me, if I felt that way I'd want to express it. Otherwise it could set a precedent of accepting a dynamic you aren't happy with." I think either way I will tell them. Either as a "I'm done" or "glad you're here but xyz" | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I’d say that you should probably cut your loses now. Even if it does go ahead, what faith will you have in subsequent meets? Are you wanting to meet him because you want to or just for a level of closure on this issue? " I don't even know. Hope? | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I’d say that you should probably cut your loses now. Even if it does go ahead, what faith will you have in subsequent meets? Are you wanting to meet him because you want to or just for a level of closure on this issue? I don't even know. Hope?" Hope alongside the pit of dread? | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I think for me, if I felt that way I'd want to express it. Otherwise it could set a precedent of accepting a dynamic you aren't happy with. I think either way I will tell them. Either as a "I'm done" or "glad you're here but xyz" " Absolute respect for that. Knowing a partner will have the difficult conversation and express her feelings is essential for me. Get your answer and your closure then, nothing lingers. Well if they are honest and can cope with a little challenge. | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I’d say that you should probably cut your loses now. Even if it does go ahead, what faith will you have in subsequent meets? Are you wanting to meet him because you want to or just for a level of closure on this issue? I don't even know. Hope?" I’d say communicate what it’s making you feel and see what they say. | |||
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"Yeah I'm not excited for the meet. Just got that pit of dread waiting for the cancel. If he does cancel tomorrow then I'm done. Its a miserable feeling. I’d say that you should probably cut your loses now. Even if it does go ahead, what faith will you have in subsequent meets? Are you wanting to meet him because you want to or just for a level of closure on this issue? I don't even know. Hope?" Did he turn up? | |||
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"OP you should get back a modicum of confidence by the outpouring of positive feedback on this thread, I can only imagine the offers hitting your inbox on the back of it. Suggest going to a club, meeting a few people without arranging it and having some fun. If you want the reassurance of knowing first, we'll happily meet you at Chams - and I'll wager half the forum would too." This was very smooth, I applaud your efforts | |||
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"OP you should get back a modicum of confidence by the outpouring of positive feedback on this thread, I can only imagine the offers hitting your inbox on the back of it. Suggest going to a club, meeting a few people without arranging it and having some fun. If you want the reassurance of knowing first, we'll happily meet you at Chams - and I'll wager half the forum would too. This was very smooth, I applaud your efforts " To be fair, we would be there anyway, if people reach over and grab us in the couples room we aren't likely to stop them | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. " Headphones Prodigy - No good. Usually does the trick for me. | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. " Ah, I'm sorry. You've done nothing wrong. Don't be mad at yourself. You don't deserve it. | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. Ah, I'm sorry. You've done nothing wrong. Don't be mad at yourself. You don't deserve it. " Thank you. I've deep cleaned my bathroom and given my kitchen a surface clean. Living room is next then tackling the hell scape that is my bedroom and storage area... I know how to live! | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. Headphones Prodigy - No good. Usually does the trick for me." Fuck yeah | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. Ah, I'm sorry. You've done nothing wrong. Don't be mad at yourself. You don't deserve it. Thank you. I've deep cleaned my bathroom and given my kitchen a surface clean. Living room is next then tackling the hell scape that is my bedroom and storage area... I know how to live! " Sounds like punishment to me! | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. " Why can't you be mad at them? | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. Ah, I'm sorry. You've done nothing wrong. Don't be mad at yourself. You don't deserve it. Thank you. I've deep cleaned my bathroom and given my kitchen a surface clean. Living room is next then tackling the hell scape that is my bedroom and storage area... I know how to live! Sounds like punishment to me! " I'm going with the whole delayed gratification thing. When everything is clean and warm and lovely it'll be worth it... | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. Why can't you be mad at them? " Proper serious life shit | |||
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"Cancelled again so I've said lets stop attempting to meet up. It's the same thing threading through all the cancellations so I just can't see it happening any time soon. I'm a bit gutted and feel quite stupid but I can't be mad at them. Bit mad at myself. " Don't be mad at yourself, get over it by going the Chams and getting some man meat | |||
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