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I need to send a first message....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

But he's ever so posh. I'm scared I'll sound too common.

Give me your best posh first message.

And no you can't ask your butler to do it.

I'll be back later to read the replies.

Toodle pip.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll be Ok.

Im not that posh!

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

Greetings. I trust you are in the best of spirits on this fine day. It is my utmost pleasure to extend my salutations and bid you a most splendid "FAF."

J

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Embrace the common! Maybe he's always fancied a bit of rough and is craving that common touch.

Ergo? Talk normally. You'll get that posh cock.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

‘My good man; one couldn’t help but to notice thy majestic looking phallus in your public gallery.

Might I entreat you to allow me to become acquainted with you in the Biblical sense?’

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

I was rather hoping you would be so kind as to insert your penis into my vagina, be rather spiffing don't you think?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut

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By *B6969Man
over a year ago

bath

Good day I hope this message finds you well,

I was hoping that you would be willing to indulge in so jolly good after hour frolicking around! A reply to consent to this would be spiffing so good day to you chap.

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Oh I say old chap, one would rather like to nosh down on your genitalia. Drop me a line and pick one up in your Roller. Toodle pip

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

Oh well it's definitely not me then!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send him a photo of you dressed as a fox and if he's truly posh he'll be round in a shot!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chat gpt sounds perfect for this its what I use for all my intro messages

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By *umalotagainMan
over a year ago

a town called malice

FFS for the last time I’m not posh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut "

This even gave me fanny flutters!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello there dear gentleman I was looking over your profile and it peaked my interest

Was scared to message you as you seem a bit posh and I am a bit commen but none the less

I was just wondering if I could give you a posh wank with my lady bits

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut "

Please send this!

Mrs

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut

This even gave me fanny flutters!!!! "

And me! though that's also because of the sender too

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut "

Right, I'm off to google for retailers of miniature top hats and monocles!

J

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere else


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut "

Another vote for using this one.

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

Agree with Meli on this one.

The posh'uns love a bit of rough.

They may want to take you home to piss Mummy off though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Salutations, I pen my epistle in the hope of your treasured company at the finest Tea Shoppe of your choice forthwith. Ever yours, PW"

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

There ain’t no posh people on fab.

Them’s all common ay they?

Just say :-

“Aroight bab

How am yow doin? I think yow’m bostin’. I do arf fancy ya. I reckon yow un me would’n arf gerron crackin’ loike.”

(Autocorrect did not like that one little bit)

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

I'm thinking something "upstairs/downstairs" maybe you could offer to serve him in his quarters? Ask which wing his bedroom is in, does he need a turn down service, bed warmer...

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Right, I'm off to google for retailers of miniature top hats and monocles!

J"

I'm already pretty determined to see what that edible glitter tastes like.

But I'm not going to say no to a top hat and monocle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""Salutations, I pen my epistle in the hope of your treasured company at the finest Tea Shoppe of your choice forthwith. Ever yours, PW"

"

I felt Nero's spirit as I wrote that!

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By *sername already in useMan
over a year ago

manchester

Actually, when I receive messages, if they’re not written in old English I immediately delete.

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By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Posh!!!!

Bollox.

No one is borne posh, in fact the word doesn't stand for what people associate the word with.

For heavens sake, embrace your normality and just write him a brief note.....

NOW. !!

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

No such thing.

Be yourself. Always.

Posh boys are amused by my Manc accent. Those that aren’t are not my people.

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut

Another vote for using this one."

And another vote for this one (might use it myself! )

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Agree with Meli on this one.

The posh'uns love a bit of rough.

They may want to take you home to piss Mummy off though."

Ha! Yes.

Just be you PW. The poshest person I know on here (who makes me sound like I'm from Luton l) is an absolute sweetheart and doesn't have a snobby bone in his body.

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By *hunkyBuggaMan
over a year ago

Devon

Wouldn’t say I’m that posh to be honest PW.

Just be you and hope for the best

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Just dont forget there is a huge distinction between “posh” and class. The latter is far more important

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

I love that everyone thinks this is real and not just an entertaining thread starter

J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love that everyone thinks this is real and not just an entertaining thread starter

J"

What? You mean....

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By *d4fun73Man
over a year ago

Shipley

Where's notsoposh when you need her!

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"I love that everyone thinks this is real and not just an entertaining thread starter

J

What? You mean.... "

Sorry, my mistake!

You just be yourself PW. He will fap himself silly to get a first message from you!

J

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By *panksspankedMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Just tell he's in for a sound thrashing and send him to bed without his supper.

They're brought up to love that kind of thing

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

My Dearest Fabber

I find myself moved to inquire upon a matter of great intimacy. Might I be so bold as to ask if your heart and intentions are inclined towards a deeper connection, one that transcends the boundaries of mere courtship? My undergarment longs for a profound union, and I wonder if your sentiments echo mine. Pray, share your thoughts on this delicate matter.

Yours sincerely,

PW

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

Dearest blue-eyed boy,

I find myself an ardent admirer of your profile, and it is with great enthusiasm that I seek to establish a more profound acquaintance, with the potential for an auspicious meeting.

With great anticipation,

Petite Woman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oi geezer.

Lie down and let me climb you like a tree.

Yours

PW

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By *lexm87Man
over a year ago

Various


"Just tell he's in for a sound thrashing and send him to bed without his supper.

They're brought up to love that kind of thing "

And dress like either his ma, or more likely, his nanny.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Is it a man ? Just say Hi.

Or even remove the word Hi and send the dot “.”

It’s a message to a man on here , there’s a high he’ll be grateful and instantly fall in love with you.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I use:

“Alright my loverrrrrr, when is this dicking taking place then? This axewound *points in direction of vagina* won’t sharpen itself”

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By *entlemanFoxMan
over a year ago

North East / London


"But he's ever so posh. I'm scared I'll sound too common.

Give me your best posh first message.

And no you can't ask your butler to do it.

I'll be back later to read the replies.

Toodle pip. "

If he is really posh rather than affected, he will have the good manners to respond to whatever you send with grace and consideration.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…


"I use:

“Alright my loverrrrrr, when is this dicking taking place then? This axewound *points in direction of vagina* won’t sharpen itself”"

*Swoons* Be still my throbbing phallus!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah PW, if he's on here, he ain't posh love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I use:

“Alright my loverrrrrr, when is this dicking taking place then? This axewound *points in direction of vagina* won’t sharpen itself”"

Now why did I read that in a Somerset accent and not a Welsh one?

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Posh birds take it up the arse so just mention that and you’ll be reet

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

By jove, how especially spiffing your profile looks, please do say hello and come over for a lovely cup of tea and cakes.

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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 26/10/23 15:56:00]

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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"Is it a man ? Just say Hi.

Or even remove the word Hi and send the dot “.”

It’s a message to a man on here , there’s a high he’ll be grateful and instantly fall in love with you.

"
This. I was about to say the same, just a hi message would be good too

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I use:

“Alright my loverrrrrr, when is this dicking taking place then? This axewound *points in direction of vagina* won’t sharpen itself”"

This really made me laugh.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Agree with Meli on this one.

The posh'uns love a bit of rough.

They may want to take you home to piss Mummy off though.

Ha! Yes.

Just be you PW. The poshest person I know on here (who makes me sound like I'm from Luton l) is an absolute sweetheart and doesn't have a snobby bone in his body."

How could you ever possibly sound like you're from Luton??

I'm not having that at all. Impossible!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm thinking something "upstairs/downstairs" maybe you could offer to serve him in his quarters? Ask which wing his bedroom is in, does he need a turn down service, bed warmer...

"

I like this idea

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Dear Sir,

I am writing to enquire as to the likely levels of inclination for you allowing my soft lips to wrap around your most magnificent shaft.

Please respond only with expressive pictures of your penis with googly eye and top hat accessories. Words don't do it for me.

Most gracious regards,

That common slut "

Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There ain’t no posh people on fab.

Them’s all common ay they?

Just say :-

“Aroight bab

How am yow doin? I think yow’m bostin’. I do arf fancy ya. I reckon yow un me would’n arf gerron crackin’ loike.”

(Autocorrect did not like that one little bit)"

Made me laugh too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Agree with Meli on this one.

The posh'uns love a bit of rough.

They may want to take you home to piss Mummy off though.

Ha! Yes.

Just be you PW. The poshest person I know on here (who makes me sound like I'm from Luton l) is an absolute sweetheart and doesn't have a snobby bone in his body."

And what's wrong with Luton? If it's alright for Lorraine Chase and Stacey Dooley it cant be that bad!

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"But he's ever so posh. I'm scared I'll sound too common.

Give me your best posh first message.

And no you can't ask your butler to do it.

I'll be back later to read the replies.

Toodle pip. "
Hello how the devil are you tally ho i was rather amused to hear that you find me attractive, would you consider giving me one behind the bike shed at ASDA doodo do do

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By *het 345Man
over a year ago

Preston

I'm not sure what "posh" is, be yourself and don't fret.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be yourself! I don’t think anyone would want you to put on any sort of act, just reach out and say hi

Mr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in Fortnum and Mason, do you need anything?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Posh and becs

Dear Posh

I would like to take tea with you at somewhere of your choice. I can provide crumpet.

Let me know at your soonest.

Becs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Faf?

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands


"Faf? "

Sure!

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Just express yourself normally, in decent English. Genuinely "Posh" people dont speak like they've swallowed a thesaurus. They're more likely to express their social status with a casual attitude to having staff, spending money and attending exclusive establishments.

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

How mate, fancy a shag, I guarantee you’ll love it.

100% certainty of success

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How mate, fancy a shag, I guarantee you’ll love it.

100% certainty of success "

That is what you sent me gosh yer posh

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By *ezandCCouple
over a year ago

Telford

The posh one is fun, but I would add to the vote to just be you, I doubt many would refuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t pretend, it will be exhausting, plus they might see through it and be put off that you’re not genuine.

You be you, you are Kenough!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How mate, fancy a shag, I guarantee you’ll love it.

100% certainty of success

That is what you sent me gosh yer posh "

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth


"Dearest blue-eyed boy,

I find myself an ardent admirer of your profile, and it is with great enthusiasm that I seek to establish a more profound acquaintance, with the potential for an auspicious meeting.

With great anticipation,

Petite Woman"

I might just use this as a copy and paste

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Dearest [Posh Man's Name],

In the shadowy realm of silent admiration, my heart and loins finds themselves ensnared by your captivating presence. From afar, I have observed your noble countenance and the grace with which you move through this world, and I am utterly entranced.

The radiance of your intellect, like a brilliant gem, has cast a luminous spell upon my soul. Your laughter through that perfectly cropped beard, a symphony of delight, echoes in the chambers of my heart, creating melodies only my spirit can fathom.

The allure of your kindness and the gentleness in your brown eyes are as a fragrant bouquet in the garden of my desires, and I long to lose myself amidst its petals. To imagine our hands entwined, lost in the labyrinth of time, is a reverie that enchants my every thought.

Though concealed by a veil of secrecy, my ardor burns with the intensity of a thousand suns. I pen this letter, a clandestine confession of the affection that dances within the deepest recesses of my klunge.

May destiny's whims someday align our paths, and may the stars conspire to reveal the identity of your ardent admirer. Until that moment, I remain, ever in silent devotion.

Yours in Absentia,

PW

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d love to help but I’m useless with all first messages

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley


"How mate, fancy a shag, I guarantee you’ll love it.

100% certainty of success

That is what you sent me gosh yer posh "

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley


"How mate, fancy a shag, I guarantee you’ll love it.

100% certainty of success

That is what you sent me gosh yer posh "

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