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The seesaw forum reactions never fail to surprise me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

some suggestions, be they in jest, ignorance or other motives are offensive..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll find that certain folk basically follow the initial posts sometimes, eg. There's often threads from guys saying something like, " that's it, I'm leaving the site" followed by everyone telling him not to let the door hit his arse on the way out and such like.

There's one posted today like that, the first few posts from people who say, that's a shame, good luck, etc (not sarcastic btw) then all the rest after that follow suit and not one " are you still here" post. I don't know if it's the much mentioned clique thing or just human nature.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I do sometimes wonder about comments. Ok, sometimes the written word does not accurately reflect the intention of the poster - written language is open to misunderstandings more so than the spoken word.

I also sometimes wonder about what people's life experience must have been to make aggressive posts - sometimes the posts say far more about the poster than about the topic.

Having been on ths site and on the forums, albeit intermittently for 4 years, I have come to the conclusion that if a thread or post threatens to irritate or upset me - I withdraw and move to another more friendly one.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I have ignored both the threads mentioned in the OP as I could guess that one was probably meant in jest and would be taken seriously and the other has had much of the steam dealt with in earlier threads.

Sometimes it just depends on who is around on the forum at the time. Some people post in a combative way and that skews a thread in that direction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people post for discussion purpose others post for reactions .. Some also post for a "lets see how many i can get banned' fix

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Some people post for discussion purpose others post for reactions .. Some also post for a "lets see how many i can get banned' fix

"
I post for chocolate ... hasnt worked so far

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By *uckoldandWifeCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

you should read the dog poo on the pavement and not picking it up threads, more passion on that subject than the fact kids in other countries die from drinking shitty water.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You'll find that certain folk basically follow the initial posts sometimes, eg. There's often threads from guys saying something like, " that's it, I'm leaving the site" followed by everyone telling him not to let the door hit his arse on the way out and such like.

There's one posted today like that, the first few posts from people who say, that's a shame, good luck, etc (not sarcastic btw) then all the rest after that follow suit and not one " are you still here" post. I don't know if it's the much mentioned clique thing or just human nature."

There was a report like this on a tv programme this week (can't remember which. Maybe the one show??) 4 people seemingly plucked from crowds at a shopping centre and sat down and asked to answer questions on general knowledge. 3 were plants. After the first couple of questions the plants deliberately said the wrong answers and the real person also said the wrong answers, despite knowing the correct answer. When asked she said she knew she was right and they were wrong but didn't want to stand out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some people post for discussion purpose others post for reactions .. Some also post for a "lets see how many i can get banned' fix

I post for chocolate ... hasnt worked so far "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think a lot of people go through life mentally quashing things they want to say, but would never dare to say out loud. Forums like these can sometimes be cathartic to those who need to "banish a demon" by putting it in words on a screen, where anonymity is reasonably guaranteed.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The deserving and undeserving poor threads get quite worked up.

Scotland, independence and British also seem to get the collective blood boiling.

Tax and foreign aid.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Some people post for discussion purpose others post for reactions .. Some also post for a "lets see how many i can get banned' fix

"

Possibly but its pretty much up to the individual posters use of the keyboard if they get banned or not. Since the forums were tightened up 18 months or go and the rules updated I for one have not posted on a subject rather than get personal or abusive. I get the passion on a subject but some are so far out of proportion in reality to other subjects at times. It does make for amusing reading at times even if its in a car crash horror sort of way.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"The deserving and undeserving poor threads get quite worked up.

Scotland, independence and British also seem to get the collective blood boiling.

Tax and foreign aid."

Benefits, NHS etc as well - I think probably (and understandably so) because those are the things that are at the heart of people's lives - topics that really affect people as opposed to threads on books, music, poems or the swinging world.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"Some people post for discussion purpose others post for reactions .. Some also post for a "lets see how many i can get banned' fix

"

Only the person typing the post can get banned, no one forces people to type bannable posts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You'll find that certain folk basically follow the initial posts sometimes, eg. There's often threads from guys saying something like, " that's it, I'm leaving the site" followed by everyone telling him not to let the door hit his arse on the way out and such like.

There's one posted today like that, the first few posts from people who say, that's a shame, good luck, etc (not sarcastic btw) then all the rest after that follow suit and not one " are you still here" post. I don't know if it's the much mentioned clique thing or just human nature.

There was a report like this on a tv programme this week (can't remember which. Maybe the one show??) 4 people seemingly plucked from crowds at a shopping centre and sat down and asked to answer questions on general knowledge. 3 were plants. After the first couple of questions the plants deliberately said the wrong answers and the real person also said the wrong answers, despite knowing the correct answer. When asked she said she knew she was right and they were wrong but didn't want to stand out. "

Wish I'd seen that, it sounds interesting.

Good point too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The deserving and undeserving poor threads get quite worked up.

Scotland, independence and British also seem to get the collective blood boiling.

Tax and foreign aid."

That is sadly down to people in the main resenting others be it one working hard and the perception others don't and from the other side lousy of someone getting paid vast amounts for the same hours of work. I get the feelings of injustice but the level of aggression at times surprises me even after 4 years here.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I saw a guy on here a couple of weeks ago and quite liked his profile and style until I saw a post he put up. Upset me quite a bit, stupidly enough, so I blocked him. Oddly, some of his posts are quite pleasant and then others rabidly nasty.

I haven't noticed any people following the crowd and agreeing or disagreeing indiscriminantly as there are always people who agree and others who don't. I think there's a good mix of people but as always whenever there are lots of people, there are lots of opinions and what some people might see as a minor issue is a major source of conflict for another.

The Swing Monopoly thread is harmless and fun, just as this site should be.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"The deserving and undeserving poor threads get quite worked up.

Scotland, independence and British also seem to get the collective blood boiling.

Tax and foreign aid.

That is sadly down to people in the main resenting others be it one working hard and the perception others don't and from the other side lousy of someone getting paid vast amounts for the same hours of work. I get the feelings of injustice but the level of aggression at times surprises me even after 4 years here. "

I've only been on the forum for about 10 months and so I don't know what it was like before but I sometimes think things get pulled and shut down before they have a chance to resolve themselves. I have seen threads change direction because some has said something in a way that makes people look at the question in a different way. I don't mind a bit of healthy debate, I quite like seeing the outrageous comments some make as it gives me an impression of them. I don't have to like everyone on here and I can't change anyone on here. I like it when someone saying something outrageous is challenged on that. I don't like it when it just dissolves into "he said/she said" rows.

We're supposed to be adults so we should have the ability to conduct a discussion in adult mode. We should also have the ability to step away from the screen if we are tempted to post something that would cause offense and lead to a ban.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Some of the responses do may you think that people have very bad memories.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Usually driven by who is not speaking to who this week, who is being chased for a fuck, is there illness, or just grandstanding......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You'll find that certain folk basically follow the initial posts sometimes, eg. There's often threads from guys saying something like, " that's it, I'm leaving the site" followed by everyone telling him not to let the door hit his arse on the way out and such like.

There's one posted today like that, the first few posts from people who say, that's a shame, good luck, etc (not sarcastic btw) then all the rest after that follow suit and not one " are you still here" post. I don't know if it's the much mentioned clique thing or just human nature."

Exactly this. Most will be outraged if you suggest they're sheep. But most are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/02/13 00:25:27]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suspect some are controversial just to get noticed and change their _iewpoint just to have a disagreement with someone. Tolerance though isn't as big a flag as you would expect though in swinging circles which is always a surprise but then we are on a forum and its the he who shouts loudest situation.

I just ignore in the main the threads that irritate or have no appeal.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I like to Play devils doodah sometimes so will put opposite side across even if it's not an opinion I agree with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I like to Play devils doodah sometimes so will put opposite side across even if it's not an opinion I agree with "

Why if you don't believe in something?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I like to Play devils doodah sometimes so will put opposite side across even if it's not an opinion I agree with "

How does the devil feel about you playing with his doodah?

I think it's useful to posit the opposite _iewpoint, particularly to help clarify your own.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"I like to Play devils doodah sometimes so will put opposite side across even if it's not an opinion I agree with

Why if you don't believe in something?"

Cos it's fun innit

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"I like to Play devils doodah sometimes so will put opposite side across even if it's not an opinion I agree with

How does the devil feel about you playing with his doodah?

I think it's useful to posit the opposite _iewpoint, particularly to help clarify your own."

He loves me playing with his doodah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Normally we would just stay away from those types, or if they become nasty, however everyone sometimes has a bad day, and will get into a discussion over something silly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and no doubt i will be lambasted, but there has been a group mentality on some threads, and a certain clique has decided for what ever reason to rip someone apart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good thread Op. I've enjoyed reading the comments. My opinion on this is touched on by a number of posters who have already contributed.

I would like to add though that I hope, in general, that it doesn't change because I believe you find out more about a person from their forum posts than their profile.

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

Sometimes I have bitten at certain threads I have felt passionate about, and wish I had worded them differently.

I stayed away from both the OAP and Oscar threads (and others) as I found them in bad taste, and some posts quite sickening IMO.

I can see how some see a 'clique' on here, and it can feel very unwelcoming and wolf pack like and makes very uncomfortable reading. The whole clique thing is a different discussion but I feel a lot of what is perceived as a clique is nothing more than a'monkey see monkey do' attitude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont mean clique in the sense that people seem to band about regularly ( i meant more of the dictionary meaning of people who interact with each other more regularly and intensely than others in the same setting)

which is understandable in any forum

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc


"I dont mean clique in the sense that people seem to band about regularly ( i meant more of the dictionary meaning of people who interact with each other more regularly and intensely than others in the same setting)

which is understandable in any forum "

Ah, sorry. Just clique gets thrown about and I never know which definition is being used, especially on a Saturday morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes you just know how a thread will go from the second response, it sets in motion many other similar comments, gaining momentum as it goes. Other times someone will post a _iewpoint completely at odds. I enjoy all this and without those huge divides of opinion it would be pretty b oring and flat.

Many times there is a pack like mentality to it though, which is why on almost every thread we get comments like 'ill no doubt be ripped to shreds for saying this', almost an apology to the perceived comments which are likely to emerge.

The only posts that I guess surprise me are the ones where certain posters let their mask fall. It is usually women and those posters will, in the main post about how at ease they are with themselves, how confident, assertive, etc etc and then you see threads or posts which are clearly aimed at another poster, again usually female, personal remarks and its then so obvious that those people aren't exactly the cool confident character they like to exude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I dont mean clique in the sense that people seem to band about regularly ( i meant more of the dictionary meaning of people who interact with each other more regularly and intensely than others in the same setting)

which is understandable in any forum

Ah, sorry. Just clique gets thrown about and I never know which definition is being used, especially on a Saturday morning "

im surprised even i could think that straight this early on a sat morning think it must be because my angels woke me at 6am!

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By *kmale421Man
over a year ago

wirral


"You'll find that certain folk basically follow the initial posts sometimes, eg. There's often threads from guys saying something like, " that's it, I'm leaving the site" followed by everyone telling him not to let the door hit his arse on the way out and such like.

There's one posted today like that, the first few posts from people who say, that's a shame, good luck, etc (not sarcastic btw) then all the rest after that follow suit and not one " are you still here" post. I don't know if it's the much mentioned clique thing or just human nature.

There was a report like this on a tv programme this week (can't remember which. Maybe the one show??) 4 people seemingly plucked from crowds at a shopping centre and sat down and asked to answer questions on general knowledge. 3 were plants. After the first couple of questions the plants deliberately said the wrong answers and the real person also said the wrong answers, despite knowing the correct answer. When asked she said she knew she was right and they were wrong but didn't want to stand out.

Wish I'd seen that, it sounds interesting.

Good point too."

You could probably IPlayer it if the program was screened in the last 7 days.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

"

The threads and responses are not comparable they are not made by the same people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

"

So many people post from a self interest point of _iew so that's what their responses are based on. They don't really see a woman in another country relating to them but someone suggesting euthanasia for people about their real age too close for comfort and get annoyed and answer with aggression.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

How does agression show itself in a response ?

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By *arlmanMan
over a year ago

Southend

People use forums to say what they dare not say in polite conversation as either they don't get any(joking) or they darent say it. You can hide behind the Internet here, say something outrageous then "user not on site". Big pinches of salt neede when reading and reacting to some of the comments.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How does agression show itself in a response ?"

Do you really need to ask that question having used the forums for a while and reading closed threads?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

[Removed by poster at 23/02/13 12:41:12]

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"How does agression show itself in a response ?

Do you really need to ask that question having used the forums for a while and reading closed threads? "

Are you going to answer the question?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I don't mind if you don't want to or can't. I asked cos I wanted to know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask a little less aggressively

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

x

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"The deserving and undeserving poor threads get quite worked up.

Scotland, independence and British also seem to get the collective blood boiling.

Tax and foreign aid."

lol your right never mind the dreaded ****back threads ,i wonder if that is the new love that has no name

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't mind if you don't want to or can't. I asked cos I wanted to know."

You want to know a lot whilst already knowing the answer but its never stopped you yet being pedantic in the past so I would be surprised if you weren't now. I can only presume the whole issue hit a raw nerve with yourself. If you honestly are making out you have yet to see aggressive comments in the forums then...forget then as I won't feed a foolish question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't mind if you don't want to or can't. I asked cos I wanted to know."

Patience is a virtue, some of us don't live our lives 24/7 so you dont have to repeat or get uppity with no reply. Look in your inbox.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

So many people post from a self interest point of _iew so that's what their responses are based on. They don't really see a woman in another country relating to them but someone suggesting euthanasia for people about their real age too close for comfort and get annoyed and answer with aggression. "

I kind of agree with this - people are going to me more emotive about things that could (or do) actually effect them. The shooting in South Africa is terrible, but it's so far away and involving people we don't know personally that it's easy to distance ourselves from is - and to some extent we kind of have to as if we let every tragedy affect us we'd all be emotional wrecks! A cull on OAP's in our own country would affect most people on the forum as they would lose loved ones, or even be close to the end themselves. Guess the more you can relate to a topic the more it provokes a reaction...whether good or bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How does agression show itself in a response ?"

Are you seriously asking this as a question? To me its plain to see when people put a personal reply which more than often or not is removed by the mods.

I await a response on this as I would love to know if you truthfully have never witnessed an aggressive post on these forums?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

So many people post from a self interest point of _iew so that's what their responses are based on. They don't really see a woman in another country relating to them but someone suggesting euthanasia for people about their real age too close for comfort and get annoyed and answer with aggression.

I kind of agree with this - people are going to me more emotive about things that could (or do) actually effect them. The shooting in South Africa is terrible, but it's so far away and involving people we don't know personally that it's easy to distance ourselves from is - and to some extent we kind of have to as if we let every tragedy affect us we'd all be emotional wrecks! A cull on OAP's in our own country would affect most people on the forum as they would lose loved ones, or even be close to the end themselves. Guess the more you can relate to a topic the more it provokes a reaction...whether good or bad"

I see that kind of thing in the headlines. Millions of people die in a natural disaster in another country... No-one bats an eyelid.

Change the headline to 1 Briton dies in disaster...... It gets a reaction.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"How does agression show itself in a response ?"
Oh come on ....are you asking that tongue in cheek? You must be as i am sure you are bright enough to know the answer. I can only think that you are being pedantic gran about the definition of aggression. I have been on these forums too long and have seen ( and participated) in threads that have gotten aggressive. Surely you wont sit on the holier than thou throne...?

People have said stuff in this forum in recent days that has shocked me, and that isnt an easy thing to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How does agression show itself in a response ?

Are you seriously asking this as a question? To me its plain to see when people put a personal reply which more than often or not is removed by the mods.

I await a response on this as I would love to know if you truthfully have never witnessed an aggressive post on these forums?

"

As you would put it Granny…....”Are you going to answer the question? I don't mind if you don't want to or can't. I asked cos I wanted to know”.

I wouldn’t ask to reply normally but you do seem to push from one from other people so I am sure you will do so and not expect others to do what you are not prepared to do yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have to say I read the “Oscar Pistorious” thread and smiled, then read the "oap population cull" and thought WHAT THE FUCK!

We had a guy suggesting Euthanasia but nobody actually died and he got lambasted to the point comments were removed. Then on this thread lets face it a woman has died brutally shot and no up uproar.

Why do people react one way to a suggested death but less ferociously to one where someone actually dies? What makes people become domineering or even aggressive on certain threads. If you have any answers enlighten me.

"

In a nutshell..... reactionary thoughts by people with no clearly defined moral, ethical, or cultural _iews that have any consistency. And an element of forgetful and/or selective thinking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well that escalated quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well that escalated quickly

"

Escalators are only used by lazy people and they should have their legs amputated and given to people prepared to use them.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Well that escalated quickly

Escalators are only used by lazy people and they should have their legs amputated and given to people prepared to use them. "

What about elevators?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well that escalated quickly

Escalators are only used by lazy people and they should have their legs amputated and given to people prepared to use them. "

But I said escalated not escalator

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

its pretty easy to recogize the nasty and aggresive posts and if people cant see them they must walk round with blinkers on

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I really think that overall most people respond to other people's post in a mature and adult manner, sometimes serious, sometimes playful and sometimes a bit of both.

Sometimes in life anger gets the better of us - and sometimes that anger is not even related to what is being said on the forum thread but more about something that has angered us outside the site and the other posts' comments kind of push certain buttons and bring that anger out.

Most of us have (more or less ) strong opinions on things - we can choose to participate in a debate or choose not to. As I said somewhere else, if I believe a thread or post would irritate or upset me then I tend to withdraw and move on to one that is friendlier, funnier, more entertaining or more relevant to me.

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