FabSwingers.com forum: Horror

By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

If you were in slasher film would you run past the open door, to hide upstairs if there was a killer in the house? Would you investigate noises in the creepy cellar? What would your game plan be and would you be the last one standing?

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

Do you know what, I was typing this and I predicted your answer. It was good knowing you man. We’ll go out together with zero glory

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

I'd just sit in the hallway and take the poker from the fireplace and poke some bitches

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

I just realised this could mean I would die first

But I meant it as in, of course I’m not investigating shit. I’m getting the fuck outta that house from the moment the floor creaked. Bffr.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

Remember the guy in Scream mentioning this unfortunate cliche in horror films?

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

Hearing the screams of your friends being slaughtered is a them problem. Grab the keys though and just hope the car starts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

Do you know what, I was typing this and I predicted your answer. It was good knowing you man. We’ll go out together with zero glory "

Girl? I’m not dying first. You on your own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

Hearing the screams of your friends being slaughtered is a them problem. Grab the keys though and just hope the car starts. "

Pretty much. Oh don't get in the car, that never ends well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

Remember the guy in Scream mentioning this unfortunate cliche in horror films? "

Omg I know this reference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m the token pisshead that’s collapsed on the sofa after sipping a bottle of Jack.

It ain’t ending well for me is it?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

See, not having sex saves me!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

- I’d definitely be investigating

#bitnosey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

You’d be the one doing the killing I’m

Guessing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

You’d be the one doing the killing I’m

Guessing "

If you can't beat em...

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

See, not having sex saves me!!!"

Sorry, but isn't it just the virgins that survive?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

See, not having sex saves me!!!

Sorry, but isn't it just the virgins that survive? "

Isn’t that only in folk horror? Or is it all horror?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Get out the house. If someone's being killed, tough, they weren't quick enough to get away, do NOT investigate any noises.

I'd survive.

You’d be the one doing the killing I’m

Guessing

If you can't beat em..."

If you can’t beat em… stab em?

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I'd just sit in the hallway and take the poker from the fireplace and poke some bitches "

Sit down? You’d die before I would!

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

See, not having sex saves me!!!"

Don’t forget to, if you’re the last one left, you will likely be related to the killer in some way so be sure check out your family tree now so as to avoid any unpleasant plot surprises

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By *hawn ScottMan
over a year ago

london Brixton

Doesn't matter how fast you run, Jason still catches up despite walking at a slow pace

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I’m the token pisshead that’s collapsed on the sofa after sipping a bottle of Jack.

It ain’t ending well for me is it? "

Depends. You could pass out so hard that killer assumes you’re already a goner. You’ll wake up the next day, no memory and a lot of corpses. Talk about hangxiety

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends if it was Sharron Stone with an ice pick, if it was I'd be upstairs, on the bed with my pants stuffed in my mouth.

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"We need to seperate good folks so the killer can pick us off easier; it’s the horror film etiquette after all

The more sexually promiscuous and stoners die first by tradition

See, not having sex saves me!!!

Sorry, but isn't it just the virgins that survive?

Isn’t that only in folk horror? Or is it all horror?"

Its across all horror isn't it? Especially the slasher genre or it used to be anyway, not so sure about newer films now I think of it tbh.

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

"I'd just sit in the hallway and take the poker from the fireplace and poke some bitches

Sit down? You’d die before I would! "

Nah I'd be alright. But of Brucey charm on the ol' ghouls and we will be doing the yokey kokey before you know it

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I'd just sit in the hallway and take the poker from the fireplace and poke some bitches

Sit down? You’d die before I would!

Nah I'd be alright. But of Brucey charm on the ol' ghouls and we will be doing the yokey kokey before you know it"

Old ghostface would put in a sexual harassment complaint. The Scream franchise would take a very different direction

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Depends if it was Sharron Stone with an ice pick, if it was I'd be upstairs, on the bed with my pants stuffed in my mouth."

Fair one. What a way to go

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

"I'd just sit in the hallway and take the poker from the fireplace and poke some bitches

Sit down? You’d die before I would!

Nah I'd be alright. But of Brucey charm on the ol' ghouls and we will be doing the yokey kokey before you know it

Old ghostface would put in a sexual harassment complaint. The Scream franchise would take a very different direction "

Wasnt that genuinely in scary movie where Ray fucks ghostface?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I am cognisant on all the cliches and am as devious as any self respecting fox.

I’ll therefore cajole others into investigating the suspect rooms

Actually…that makes me the obligatory slimy, shit bag character though doesn’t it?

….and they always get offed in the end in spectacular fashion…

Bugger!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to think I’d think logically and survive but in reality i’d run into the woods, trip over a branch and be killed within the first half an hour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

I just realised this could mean I would die first

But I meant it as in, of course I’m not investigating shit. I’m getting the fuck outta that house from the moment the floor creaked. Bffr. "

https://youtu.be/l6GbCPAtnLA?si=XsMUv6tNTjEICFit

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I like to think I’d think logically and survive but in reality i’d run into the woods, trip over a branch and be killed within the first half an hour

Hey come on now. It happens to the best of us

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I'd definitely not survive. I'd probably start flirting with the killer.

Then I'd text you to say he's not that bad, just misunderstood as he's busy hacking through somebody.

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I'd definitely not survive. I'd probably start flirting with the killer.

Then I'd text you to say he's not that bad, just misunderstood as he's busy hacking through somebody."

I can already hear the voicenote.

And I can already hear myself enabling it.

Glitter looks like red flags from a distance. Dig deeper, you can save him

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

Unfortunately I’m rather obviously typecast.

That really sexy character that dies quite horribly being a bit ditsy but not before my clothes get ripped and all the good bits are on show.

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

"Unfortunately I’m rather obviously typecast.

That really sexy character that dies quite horribly being a bit ditsy but not before my clothes get ripped and all the good bits are on show."

I'm sticking with these!

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Unfortunately I’m rather obviously typecast.

That really sexy character that dies quite horribly being a bit ditsy but not before my clothes get ripped and all the good bits are on show."

Yeah the 10s don’t do well. We’ll grab a bottle of Prosecco and wait to be slaughtered

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees"

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive

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By *ataleMan
over a year ago

Durham

I’d grab a chainsaw - I’d go go Bruce Campbell on their arse!

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

I just realised this could mean I would die first

But I meant it as in, of course I’m not investigating shit. I’m getting the fuck outta that house from the moment the floor creaked. Bffr. "

Yeah the South Park film was the first to really call out this film making bias. And they did so with typical bluntness

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

Everybody floats down here

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive"

Room for one more on the bench?

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Everybody floats down here

Ha! Yes! book or film though?

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive

Room for one more on the bench?"

Welcome. Come take a seat my fellow loser.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you were in slasher film would you run past the open door, to hide upstairs if there was a killer in the house? Would you investigate noises in the creepy cellar? What would your game plan be and would you be the last one standing?

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither. "

You'd have to line up after me.....hahahaha

I'm blind as a bat without my glasses, I'm deaf on one side so don't have a clue where sudden sounds are coming from so I'd probably run to the killer and my balance is to shot. Although I maybe able to fend off any unwanted attacks with my stick.....hahahaha

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

You'd have to line up after me.....hahahaha

You sound like Velma from Scooby Doo

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive

Room for one more on the bench?

Welcome. Come take a seat my fellow loser. "

Are we the losers club?!?!

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"Everybody floats down here

Ha! Yes! book or film though?"

Book for sure , although film turned out better than I expected

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive

Room for one more on the bench?"

I’ll save you Daizy, oops who put that axe in my chest

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By *iaisonseekerMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

If survival means avoiding pre-marital sex, drugs/alcohol, showers, and being a smart-arse, the survivors would envy the dead.

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

You'd have to line up after me.....hahahaha

Oh you sound fantastic! If I’m ever in a slasher film situation I’ll personally request your attendance. I reckon together we might have a chance…

..that the killer will take pity on us

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive"

It's a fine crowd to be in

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By *lasphemousGirlWoman
over a year ago

Cambs

I am either the one trying to run in the wrong shoes, in which case I'm definitely a gonner pretty soon into the flick or the dangerously overprepared anti-hero.. no inbetween!

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hants, that's a thought that's going to fester. Because I don't have a good answer yet and I need one so I don't die.

#livesaloneinahousesurroundedby darkandtrees

Don’t worry you can join the losers bench with the rest of us that won’t survive

Room for one more on the bench?

Welcome. Come take a seat my fellow loser.

Are we the losers club?!?!"

It's a catchy name...

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"I am either the one trying to run in the wrong shoes, in which case I'm definitely a gonner pretty soon into the flick or the dangerously overprepared anti-hero.. no inbetween!"

Watch out fir that almost invisible tree root !!!!

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I’m surviving thanks. I’ve got a horrible temper

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"I’m surviving thanks. I’ve got a horrible temper

I did not see this plot twist

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

I am the one hiding under the bed thinking that's clever, only to be dragged by my feet and slashed.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I'd probably freeze, cry, have a panic attack then find a weapon and go on a rampage.

Not in the basement or attic though.

I'm not totally stupid.

I wouldn't be able to run and not know what was behind me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1st thing I would do is put the lights on. Why does no one ever do that in all the horror films.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I always wear pyjamas in bed and keep slippers and dressing gown close by, just in case I need to fight off a monster.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"1st thing I would do is put the lights on. Why does no one ever do that in all the horror films."

You'd need to go down to the basement to mend the fuse box first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like this is where I need to watch more horror films. I'm terribly unprepared and under equipped to know how to survive a killer rampaging through my house.

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By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"1st thing I would do is put the lights on. Why does no one ever do that in all the horror films."

Good northern common sense that ( most horror set in Murica which explains a lot lol)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And don't think about jumping in your car and driving away because it won't start up they never do in Horror ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always wear pyjamas in bed and keep slippers and dressing gown close by, just in case I need to fight off a monster."

Why I sleep naked. Scare them away.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

I'd be doing the slashing. You're definitely first Hants. Again.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I’m too fat to run far or climb through a bathroom window

besides the fact I wouldn’t get very far without needing a wee

so I would be that character that goes “ohh it’s you” before being slashed to death

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I’m too fat to run far or climb through a bathroom window

besides the fact I wouldn’t get very far without needing a wee

so I would be that character that goes “ohh it’s you” before being slashed to death

Ah! The old secret reveal! Great shout, we need one of those.

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I'd be doing the slashing. You're definitely first Hants. Again. "

That’s fair.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Away for Christmas

I mean, it's a slasher so the crazy psycho is human. Much easier to handle than the supernatural or paranormal etc. Jason and Myers don't count.

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"I mean, it's a slasher so the crazy psycho is human. Much easier to handle than the supernatural or paranormal etc. Jason and Myers don't count. "

Seems like the kind of attitude that will get you killed off within the first 20 mins

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it's a slasher so the crazy psycho is human. Much easier to handle than the supernatural or paranormal etc. Jason and Myers don't count. "

He's dead^

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

I can answer this one. These scenarios get discussed a lot with American 'out of my cold-dead hand' friends.

The answer is shotgun. Corner of the room furthest from the door. Lights off. When the door opens high power torch in their face and boom.

Job done. You can thank me come the apocalypse.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's often the very attractive that get picked off early. I'm grateful for not being blessed and going to ugly myself up. Then work out how we could team together to take out the murderer. I know my odds aren't good but I'm not exploring distractions, just looking for weapons

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By *niquemale17Man
over a year ago

Swindon

"My answer is- I’m Black. What do you fucking think? Kmt

I'm with you brother lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Creep to one side off the place start a fire and then go to the other side off the building

The fire will force everyone including the killer out off the house as they go chase after the ones that exit the house I leave from the opposite side in the opposite direction

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Away for Christmas

"I mean, it's a slasher so the crazy psycho is human. Much easier to handle than the supernatural or paranormal etc. Jason and Myers don't count.

Seems like the kind of attitude that will get you killed off within the first 20 mins "

But the rules of a slasher film exist as such, however the people in said slasher film are created to fail. They avoid any and all potential weapons for defense and instead go for the obvious ones, which tend to be missing or flawed in the first place. And have absolutely no idea how to defend themselves or use said weapon in any way.

Got a psycho with a knife coming at you... Use a broom or a weapon with reach.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Away for Christmas

"I mean, it's a slasher so the crazy psycho is human. Much easier to handle than the supernatural or paranormal etc. Jason and Myers don't count.

He's dead^"

Only on the inside

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

"Creep to one side off the place start a fire and then go to the other side off the building

The fire will force everyone including the killer out off the house as they go chase after the ones that exit the house I leave from the opposite side in the opposite direction "

I quite like the ruthlessness of this. To hand over you friends like that really separates you which means you’ve got great odds. I think it’s going to be between you and Elphaba. The rest of us are goners

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither. "

Definitely not the last one standing.

I can't run.

I'd either be killed during the intro credits OR be completely indestructible, like a cockroach

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

Definitely not the last one standing.

I can't run.

I'd either be killed during the intro credits OR be completely indestructible, like a cockroach

I reckon you’ll be severely injured opening credits but will make a comeback towards the end and save the day.

Or so we think.

It will be that fake ending where you think it’s all rosey until you realise there’s still 25 mins of the film left. Then you’ll get got.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

Definitely not the last one standing.

I can't run.

I'd either be killed during the intro credits OR be completely indestructible, like a cockroach

I reckon you’ll be severely injured opening credits but will make a comeback towards the end and save the day.

Or so we think.

It will be that fake ending where you think it’s all rosey until you realise there’s still 25 mins of the film left. Then you’ll get got. "

At least if I'm severely injured, I'll already have a special wheely chair to scoot around the rest of the film!

How will I end?!

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By *amie Hants OP Woman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

Definitely not the last one standing.

I can't run.

I'd either be killed during the intro credits OR be completely indestructible, like a cockroach

I reckon you’ll be severely injured opening credits but will make a comeback towards the end and save the day.

Or so we think.

It will be that fake ending where you think it’s all rosey until you realise there’s still 25 mins of the film left. Then you’ll get got.

At least if I'm severely injured, I'll already have a special wheely chair to scoot around the rest of the film!

How will I end?! "

In an explosion

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I think I’d die first. Fight or flight is flawed. I can do neither.

Definitely not the last one standing.

I can't run.

I'd either be killed during the intro credits OR be completely indestructible, like a cockroach

I reckon you’ll be severely injured opening credits but will make a comeback towards the end and save the day.

Or so we think.

It will be that fake ending where you think it’s all rosey until you realise there’s still 25 mins of the film left. Then you’ll get got.

At least if I'm severely injured, I'll already have a special wheely chair to scoot around the rest of the film!

How will I end?!

In an explosion

I won't go towards the light!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Grab the shotgun and start clearing rooms.

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By *ndycoinsMan
over a year ago

Whaley Bridge,Nr Buxton,

"Grab the shotgun and start clearing rooms.

22" barells,number 4 shot.For that little bit extra,Federal Express.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

I wouldn't be worried. When he came for me I'd drink his blood. Dont fuck with a vampire! Especially a sweet transvestite vampire!

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, yet shall I fear no evil. For I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley!"

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Or... we could do the Monster Mash! (I hear it was a graveyard smash).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear a noise, go the opposite direction!

See something weird, run!

Place looks scary, don’t enter… I’ve seen too many movies to know what’s good for me lmao

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home

Hate horror films

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