FabSwingers.com forum: Unhealthy Relationship

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because you’re about to get hell unleashed upon you, I’ll simply state that every situation is utterly unique.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally no

Try and deal with the root cause of the unhappiness. If you can honestly say youve done all that you can then walk away.

Why cause more hurt

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

I don’t think anything, ever, justifies cheating

Staying in unhappy/ unhealthy relationships for the kids is the most damage you can do to the kids, IMO.

Each to their own

I judge for it and avoid people in that situation where possible x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

If you’re not happy in your relationships, the idea of staying together just for the sake of the kids is the worst thing you can think of.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think yes

Divorce can be rough financially and on the kids

A dead bedroom sometimes isn’t anyone’s fault

Sometimes the marriage is fine but you just need to sex

It’s not black and white

Especially if it’s a dead bedroom situation. If the bed room is dead why do you care if they cheat?

It’s always about the context

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I do agree about the financial things which causes alot of problems gor kids later

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

No.

LvM

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid"

Lots of people cheat. I have started a chat on here for them to go, I am married does that bother you or with a gf etc.

Fab is full of cheaters.. Just they do not say so in public or profile.

I get,.. I am in a sexless marriage. All the time lately

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that cheating can be avoided

Our journey started off due to sex being infrequent

Mel knew it was bothering me and it was bothering her

We were both worried the other would stray and so we opened up and had a night away from the kids and an honest chat

I had no idea of what she would say and vice versa

Best thing we did was talk

Now as long as we know the other is safe we have the others “blessing” to explore what we want. Went very quickly into a place where it was encouraged and enjoyed and we have opened up many avenues of pleasure

Try honesty before dishonesty you don’t know what doors it will open x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

For me, no. Mainly being that I wouldn't want to do something that I know would hurt my partner and family if they knew. When cheating/lying, it takes away the other person's choice.

I would say most people instinctively know something isn't quite right when cheating occurs in their relationship and to me, that's very unfair to enable a situation where they are overriding instincts. It can cause such damage and pain.

I would put my energy into breaking up well rather than risking heartbreak and bad break up.

Life can be better for everyone when an unhealthy relationship ends. The kids included. I do know this from experience.

There are many ethical ways to address the situation. So I would go for that personally.

I know it isn't easy to make big changes and how hard it is to stay in a sexless or affectionless relationship.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. And I don't think people think enough about impact on their kids and partner if they find out about cheating. And that is why I didn't stay in a very unhappy relationship. Financially it's made a huge impact on me. But it was no way to live.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rancois Du BoisMan
over a year ago

Down the back of the sofa.

Cheating is not and has never been part of swinging.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid"

Just tell your wife.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

Absolutely not, it's about doing the right thing, by yourself, your partner and thr kids, cheating can and often causes more hurt and damage to deal with. As well as the side that we pass on things to thr next generation by tjr things that we do and what we show them, you show them it's ok to cheat they'll believe it's ok to cheat.

More so than the initial root cause of the decision to cheat...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honest answer?

A child just needs to know it is loved. Whether parents are together or not.

I split with my daughter's mother when daughter was 5. She is now a well adjusted successful 19 year old. She has virtually no memories of when her parents were together. Had we stayed together her memories would have been of growing up in a family where the dynamic between her parents was all wrong.

Staying for the sake of the children has the potential to do more harm than good.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

That’s just a form of cognitive dissonance. Rationalising because the cheater know really it would be hurtful to their partner so they blame it on the situation, or the partner, instead of dealing with the issues or accepting it’s best to walk.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

No. Not unless you're prepared for everything to fall apart if the other person finds out. Are you willing to risk that and cause that much hurt?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ubmissiveman2uMan
over a year ago

Cheshire

The kids will already be aware of the relationship, they are very resilient,walk away , life to short to be unhappy, best of luck .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustincamebridgeCouple
over a year ago

manchester

I have been with Cammy over 20 years and I am so happy. I have never, and would not ever cheat on her. That’s how we both decided we would occasionally meet and play with others as a couple.

My first marriage was toxic. I never wanted to be in it and often cheated. I often worked away, I often stayed out rather than go home

My opinion? I was living a lie. Cheating makes you both untrustworthy and a liar.

Go and be happy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

It's not for me, I would put it out in the open. My general principle is not to hide anything that would affect the other person's decision to stay in a relationship.

Is life more complex than simple rules, yes of course it is. But and more knots to a tangled mess is just going to make more of an ordeal when it has to be unravelled.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid"

Fuck me, that question took a twist.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

Cheating if you can find the opportunity is most likely to be only a very short lived quick fix and no answer to your problems.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

No,kids are not happy in unhappy relationships however hard you try to hide it. They know, they always know..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

It's never valid.

You need to have a very honest conversation, if you are both only there for the kids.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

You should do what you think is best op. If you're seeking validation from other people you probably won't get it here... publicly anyway

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

The short answer is no

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

"if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid"
Nope, leaving is the better option for everyone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

No, leave!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You should do what you think is best op. If you're seeking validation from other people you probably won't get it here... publicly anyway "

Agree with you, i will do what comes in my mind

Thank you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *appyhippoWoman
over a year ago

coventry

"if u are not happy in your relationship nd just for sake of kids you are dragging. Do u think cheating in such relationship valid"

If you are not happy in the relationship how is cheating going to make you happy? Ok it may make you feel loved? Wanted? Desired? In that moment but the problems at home would still be there. If you are truly not happy in a relationship and you have exhausted every avenue of communication to work on the relationship then it’s time to walk away. Even if kids are involved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread