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.. and give some of the ladies on here a chance to have sex with us 
Fellas, say you’re in if you’re prepared to lower the bar for a bit and satiate the womenfolk of the forums.
Ladies, say you’re in if you want to play and hopefully hook a date with one of us ‘normally out of your league’ men.
This is a limited time offer only : tonight only (or the first 25 women that want me, whichever comes first)
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Second thoughts, my wand is always ready and willing  | |||
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I’m in. Let’s see what happens | |||
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"I'm still waiting! Mens standards clearly haven't lowered enough yet "Oh go then  | |||
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"Still not lowering my standards "One less man to compete with | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM" I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM Me? F" Pass. LvM | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy" Is that like a handy but worse? LvM | |||
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"Still not lowering my standards
One less man to compete with "I've seen the forum roster. I'm not missing out. | |||
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J | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM" A really nice verification? | |||
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"Still not lowering my standards
One less man to compete with
I've seen the forum roster. I'm not missing out. " | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy Is that like a handy but worse? LvM" I think we could just be hitting a regional difference here but to manage your expectations yes it will be worse. I hope you like the uncomfortable type of prolonged eye contact. | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM" A lifetime of regret 
J | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A really nice verification?" Nah. If it's not off-puttingly graphic, I don't want it. LvM | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy Is that like a handy but worse? LvM I think we could just be hitting a regional difference here but to manage your expectations yes it will be worse. I hope you like the uncomfortable type of prolonged eye contact. " If you could look completely uninterested the whole time, maybe browse Facebook while you're at it, that'd be great. LvM | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A lifetime of regret
J"Now we're talking. LvM | |||
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"Already found one with subterranean standards when I met Beef. What are the chances of meeting another in this lifetime?
J"Oi - don't be greedy!!  | |||
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"I'm still waiting! Mens standards clearly haven't lowered enough yet "Well you’re the one looking for a sympathy fuck, ping out a copy and paste scatter gun FaF to all the men in the thread and see who takes pity. Thems the rules | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A really nice verification? Nah. If it's not off-puttingly graphic, I don't want it. LvM" "...his stupendous cock nearly split me in two. He rammed it in like he was loading a cannon. The drops of sweat fell on me like a summer rainstorm as he fucked me like a Jack Russell on his favourite teddy bear.." | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A really nice verification? Nah. If it's not off-puttingly graphic, I don't want it. LvM "...his stupendous cock nearly split me in two. He rammed it in like he was loading a cannon. The drops of sweat fell on me like a summer rainstorm as he fucked me like a Jack Russell on his favourite teddy bear.."" Almost. Imagine you're a 45 year old incel writing the most detailed erotic Fab fiction about your imaginary mates mum that you totally banged last night and made her squirt like thirty times. That'll put you in the ballpark. LvM | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy Is that like a handy but worse? LvM I think we could just be hitting a regional difference here but to manage your expectations yes it will be worse. I hope you like the uncomfortable type of prolonged eye contact. If you could look completely uninterested the whole time, maybe browse Facebook while you're at it, that'd be great. LvM" Could I text my friends mean things but make it obvious I’m talking about you? | |||
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"I'm still waiting! Mens standards clearly haven't lowered enough yet "Looks like your waiting in the perfect position from your display pic as well | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM I can offer an unenthusiastic wristy Is that like a handy but worse? LvM I think we could just be hitting a regional difference here but to manage your expectations yes it will be worse. I hope you like the uncomfortable type of prolonged eye contact. If you could look completely uninterested the whole time, maybe browse Facebook while you're at it, that'd be great. LvM Could I text my friends mean things but make it obvious I’m talking about you?" I guess so, just make it quick will you?
LvM | |||
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"I'm still waiting! Mens standards clearly haven't lowered enough yet "Grab ya coat and lube, you’ve pulled | |||
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Tinder x | |||
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"Came in with a low bar, still room for it to be lowered...fuck it I'm In "It needs to be so low you have to step over it. Pretty please  | |||
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"Finally a chance to pull!!
Tinder x"Hi | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A really nice verification? Nah. If it's not off-puttingly graphic, I don't want it. LvM "...his stupendous cock nearly split me in two. He rammed it in like he was loading a cannon. The drops of sweat fell on me like a summer rainstorm as he fucked me like a Jack Russell on his favourite teddy bear.." Almost. Imagine you're a 45 year old incel writing the most detailed erotic Fab fiction about your imaginary mates mum that you totally banged last night and made her squirt like thirty times. That'll put you in the ballpark. LvM" "He said he'd help me with the laundry, but as soon as I put the last of my youngest's soiled pants in, he pushed my head in the washing machine and rattled me like a fixed odds betting machine. All I could hear was the chug chug chug of coins falling from his pockets. Each time I heard a coin bounce on the ground he pushed my head deeper into the washing machine, as I squirted on his cock. My flaps clapped in wet applause as he switched holes. The linoleum floor looked more like a paddling pool than a kitchen. With an enduring squelch I prolapsed. Sodden and soiled I watched him eat my last viscount as he winked at me and left." | |||
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"Came in with a low bar, still room for it to be lowered...fuck it I'm In
It needs to be so low you have to step over it. Pretty please "You ain't limboing uderneath it | |||
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"What's in it for me though? LvM A really nice verification? Nah. If it's not off-puttingly graphic, I don't want it. LvM "...his stupendous cock nearly split me in two. He rammed it in like he was loading a cannon. The drops of sweat fell on me like a summer rainstorm as he fucked me like a Jack Russell on his favourite teddy bear.." Almost. Imagine you're a 45 year old incel writing the most detailed erotic Fab fiction about your imaginary mates mum that you totally banged last night and made her squirt like thirty times. That'll put you in the ballpark. LvM "He said he'd help me with the laundry, but as soon as I put the last of my youngest's soiled pants in, he pushed my head in the washing machine and rattled me like a fixed odds betting machine. All I could hear was the chug chug chug of coins falling from his pockets. Each time I heard a coin bounce on the ground he pushed my head deeper into the washing machine, as I squirted on his cock. My flaps clapped in wet applause as he switched holes. The linoleum floor looked more like a paddling pool than a kitchen. With an enduring squelch I prolapsed. Sodden and soiled I watched him eat my last viscount as he winked at me and left." " Excellent. That should make sure I never get another meet 
LvM | |||
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"FFS, I’ve offered up pity fucks but where are all the desperate vulva pics in my inbox? "I didn't want to put you off!! | |||
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"I'm hoping there I someone here with standards lower than a snakes belly "I literally said that at the start of the first thread. "Lower than a rattlesnake’s belly, I’m telling you." So I guess we’re a match. Get your glitter, you’ve pulled. | |||
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"You all lowered your standards this year when you sent your penis to me. Are you sure you wanna do it twice? "I’ve never sent my penis to you! Slanderous | |||
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"I’ve never sent my penis to you! Slanderous " I have. | |||
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"You all lowered your standards this year when you sent your penis to me. Are you sure you wanna do it twice?
I’ve never sent my penis to you! Slanderous "I have a wicked imagination | |||
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"Back again to give away some orgasms to the unattractives of fab" Here to beg like Oliver, “please sir, I want some more” | |||
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"I’ve never sent my penis to you! Slanderous I have. "I only peeked a second at it | |||
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"Whats in it for me ??" That glow you get when helping the less fortunate. Or social media likes if you immediately tell everyone about your charitable deed on Facebook or Insta like when ‘influencers’ buy a coffee for a local down-and-out but have to film themselves doing it | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. If we could just drop a tad lower please boys "Ok resend and I’ll accept this time | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…." *checks inbox* Nope. As bare as Mother Hubbard’s cupboards. | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. If we could just drop a tad lower please boys
Ok resend and I’ll accept this time "On its way hot stuff | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. If we could just drop a tad lower please boys "No close up vulva pics so I deleted it | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. *checks inbox* Nope. As bare as Mother Hubbard’s cupboards." I got an auto reply from Fabmin “Dear Misty You have sent 2000 messages to this user. You have received 0 replies. Please stop. You’re embarrassing yourself. Hell - at this point you’re embarrassing us”! | |||
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"Oh good it’s still going that means I’m still in with a chance! " *side eye* | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. If we could just drop a tad lower please boys
No close up vulva pics so I deleted it "I tried… but I got too close and now I’m missing an iPhone 13 | |||
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"Well I’ve sent out a whole heap of copy & pasted messages…. If we could just drop a tad lower please boys
No close up vulva pics so I deleted it
I tried… but I got too close and now I’m missing an iPhone 13 "Well if you ever manage to get it back, a couple of days in a bag of rice should see it right again | |||
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"Oh good it’s still going that means I’m still in with a chance! *side eye*" Sooo…..is that a yes? | |||
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"Sooo…..is that a yes? " Fuck it. Yes. Hop on a train and come over. I’ll wait. | |||
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 at midnight ladies. Tick Tock. Not long left to get your DMs in to the fellas | |||
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"Back again to give away some orgasms to the unattractives of fab Here to beg like Oliver, “please sir, I want some more” " I’d love you on your knees | |||
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"I’ve never sent my penis to you! Slanderous I have. "You are a gift to these women | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now? "My standards are low but you’re too smol to get on this ride | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now?
My standards are low but you’re too smol to get on this ride"Smol hey? FFS. Like I’ve got to wait a week for cock | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now?
My standards are low but you’re too smol to get on this ride
Smol hey? FFS. Like I’ve got to wait a week for cock "Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. | |||
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"I don’t normally do Part 2’s of threads or owt, but think of the low quality ladies, gents. They need some lovin’ too so let’s continue to help them out. In case you have NO idea what I’m on about, here’s the blurb from part one .. who’s in!?
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.. and give some of the ladies on here a chance to have sex with us
Fellas, say you’re in if you’re prepared to lower the bar for a bit and satiate the womenfolk of the forums.
Ladies, say you’re in if you want to play and hopefully hook a date with one of us ‘normally out of your league’ men.
This is a limited time offer only : tonight only (or the first 25 women that want me, whichever comes first)
"Out of what league.. Super league by cinch.. Or fantasy league.. Honestly OP.. how low can you go | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now?
My standards are low but you’re too smol to get on this ride
Smol hey? FFS. Like I’ve got to wait a week for cock "I’ve had to Google “smol” as I’m way too old to understand what all this youth speak means. All I can find is an advert for a company selling “planet friendly cleaning products” | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now? "Me too. What league of gents is this.. | |||
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 . But I am in | |||
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"I’m still waiting for cock. Isn’t it supposed to have been delivered by now?
My standards are low but you’re too smol to get on this ride
Smol hey? FFS. Like I’ve got to wait a week for cock
I’ve had to Google “smol” as I’m way too old to understand what all this youth speak means.
All I can find is an advert for a company selling “planet friendly cleaning products” "Oh that one is mine… I do well with those products | |||
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"It’s over? Oh no " We can do a special extension if you want .. | |||
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"It’s over? Oh no We can do a special extension if you want .. "yes please | |||
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"Ah damn I missed this thread! Too late "I missed it too... | |||
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"Ah damn I missed this thread! Too late "No your not, come in get naked, find somewhere comfy to sit | |||
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"!!! BREAKING NEWS !!!! 24 hour extension : so it was for TWO nights only! Ignore the original OP, he doesn’t know what he’s taking about!" Am I In the first 25 who want you Dan? | |||
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"Ah damn I missed this thread! Too late
I missed it too...
"Ah well we can have each other | |||
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"Oooh a Nora and Posh threesome opportunity, life doesn’t get better than this "Erm. Nora and Posh is two peoples | |||
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"Oooh a Nora and Posh threesome opportunity, life doesn’t get better than this
Erm. Nora and Posh is two peoples "(Slides in with 2 cocktails) | |||
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"Oooh a Nora and Posh threesome opportunity, life doesn’t get better than this
Erm. Nora and Posh is two peoples "Hi you two | |||
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"!!! BREAKING NEWS !!!! 24 hour extension : so it was for TWO nights only! Ignore the original OP, he doesn’t know what he’s taking about! Am I In the first 25 who want you Dan?" You said last night that you like fucking through the night. I’m too old for all that Nora. Can we do a 30 min quickie instead please? | |||
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"I'm hoping there I someone here with standards lower than a snakes belly
I literally said that at the start of the first thread.
Lower than a rattlesnake’s belly, I’m telling you.
So I guess we’re a match. Get your glitter, you’ve pulled."**grabs coat** whoop | |||
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"I’m in let’s see where to set the bar "How low does your bar go?? | |||
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"I’m in let’s see where to set the bar
How low does your bar go?? "Daizy you’d qualify wherever the bar was, just say the word | |||
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"Ah damn I missed this thread! Too late
I missed it too...
Ah well we can have each other "Deal! | |||
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"If needs must, but definitely for 1 night only, I don't feel good about lowering my standards. So, tonight only, ladies without a pulse, feel free to contact me* * I'm not completely dropping my standards, some rules will apply, no rigor mortis, no smelly rotting flesh, must not be cremated, must be able to travel to me and hold a good conversation. I'll be waiting by my inbox until midnight only "I'm out now, I make this^ overly generous offer to the less fortunate, bottom dwelling ladies of fab, and what thanks do I get for it? Just 1 solitary wink, from a man
Sorry swamp donkeys of fab, my standards have been reset to their original levels, all thanks to some bloke who thought he was as high a standard as a woman with no pulse!
If anyone has any complaints about this, write it down on a paper airplane and throw it at some random bloke! | |||
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"What ? When were we supposed to have standards ? If I have to get some the wife’s not going to be happy, where are her and the kids going to live ? The mr " You can keep the kids... standards don't apply to crotch goblins. I'll take the wife | |||
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