FabSwingers.com forum: Burnt Fingers

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Having wrongly trusted someone and had my fingers well and truly burnt this past week, I wondered which other Fabbers have got it wrong and if it put them off meeting/swinging at all?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Not from here but it has been years of trial and error and we all make mistakes. Dont let it put you off, pick yourself up and dust yourself down and try not to dwell on it too much

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

mistakes are made for a reason, they are there so that we learn from them and dont repeat them .............. u will be fine, shoulders back big smile and move on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Not actually burnt fingers, but I am a bit depressed at the lack of honestly displayed by some people.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not actually burnt fingers, but I am a bit depressed at the lack of honestly displayed by some people."

Amen!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yup first guy i met from fabs totally fucked with my head.. still live n learn.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I Can normally read people well .. maybe my pride was hurt not sure really. But did upset me trusting and being let down.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Not just fingers burned but been subjected to the whole Joan of Arc burnt at the stake treatment.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

been lucky enough to have scorch free fingers so far

i have had guys who i thought there could be more with but they have gon on to find other people. it hurt at the time but as i hadnt completely staked my claim on them i wasnt actually that hurt at the time. more pissed off that i couldnt have sex with them anymore lol

i even got invited to one of them's wedding

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickiemintMan
over a year ago

Somewhere NW London

"Having wrongly trusted someone and had my fingers well and truly burnt this past week, I wondered which other Fabbers have got it wrong and if it put them off meeting/swinging at all?

Yes, its happened to us. My ex boss and his FB tried to split Su and I up. Thats one reason why he's my ex-boss. The injuries he received didn't help either, but they apparently healed ok.

And i'm normally one of the most laid-back and nice guys you'll meet, but some things are just one step too far. Rich

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I'm learning everyday not to trust anyone on here.

You confide in someone and they blab it all over the net. Women!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive been lucky really but prior to fabs, i had more than my fingers burnt and through that, i dont do relationships at all.

I try and listen to my instincts ,sixth sense or whatever you call it. And its served me well so far...

If its meant to work, it will

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got my fingers burnt more than once, just need to move on and live life to the full.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Yeap! Been there as well, just have to learn from it I suppose!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got seriously burned once, it led to months of misery until the police sorted it.

I learned from it and moved on...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Yep on a few occasions... I am not a very trusting person... I don't suffer fools gladly...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The last time I got my fingers burned I had to involve the police.

I don't let people in very easily now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes and it's the reson I am not meeting at the mo

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig jugsWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

yep i agree and thats why im not meeting at the mo either

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ady4ladyWoman
over a year ago

liverpool

wow, a lot of people seem to have experienced some very nasty happenings. I had no idea that it went on. Im sure it would be interesting for many to see some examples of what to look out for etc.

Glad everyone seems to of healed x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There have been people that have made me sit up and think.

But I guess that's the problem here, you can portray yourself in any way you want. It'd the same on dating sites too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

when a child is told not to touch a hot surface.. burnie burnie, they quickly learn.....

adults sometimes take longer and many, many, many more burnie burnie....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met a guy off here about 2 years ago that just turned up at my house one day, to say i was shocked was a understatment as i had never given him my address, it turned out he had followed me home one night when i left the hotel we had met in, i got a taxi and he followed it to see where i lived then just turned up unannounced

If i had been new to this that would have put me off meeting anyone, but as i have been doing this many years i know not all men are like that

It did make me weary after tho and for a while after i started walking home as its easier to notice someone curb crawling at the side of you than noticing a car following you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "

I started to get feeling and not just friends for someone and told them thinks were starting to get confused and that i thort i might be falling for him so I needed to stop meeting and he said he had feeling for me as well any way turns out I wasn't the only girl he was saying this to and now my head is all over the place because I have been single for 5 year and always thort I was happy single but If I was happy single how the fuck did I fall for him or even let it get that far !!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.

I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know. "

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know. "

Having your fingers burnt... is nt that (sadly) part of life? I mean it happens to us all in one way or another. Some are particularly unfortunate, I agree...

Either way... I agree with the poster above.. to try and not let a bad experience cloud our judgment of the next experience - otherwise we may miss some nice opportunities?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "

Misread the op, thought it was meeting in general. That said, same could apply if you meet regularly one on one and you believe you're the only one I can see how that happens with singles.

Don't know how couples get in that situation though.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "

A bit of both.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I have said it many times before, I will say it again.

Some people come into swinging at their most vulnerable, share their woes for all to see, their achilles heel and there are folks who will say all the right things to maximise their opportunity for some form of gain.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with.. "

ive known people not meet because they support different football teams ffs lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have said it many times before, I will say it again.

to dam right

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with..

ive known people not meet because they support different football teams ffs lol"

I don't support any football team so I am ok there...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

I struggle to spend time with Conservative voters so finding out someone was BNP would be a dealbreaker for me.

If someone doesn't make their political _iews obvious then no problem, but quite a few people do unfortunately.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eryBigGirlWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

Erm .... do you know the bnp's _iews if so clearly she wouldn't to be involved with them!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I Can normally read people well .. maybe my pride was hurt not sure really. But did upset me trusting and being let down."

It's hard isn't it.

I have had someone fool me. But you can not let one bad apple spoil the barrel. X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!

How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust?

A bit of both."

Yep....and much too quickly too. Lessons learnt though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ady4ladyWoman
over a year ago

liverpool

A lot of the situations described happen in all walks of life, work colleagues, friends, relatives, they can all take your trust and betray you, its not just 'swing' relationships where it happens. I think the answe is how you react to it and deal with it, and you cant react or deal until you have experienced it. So treat every 'hurdle' as a learning curve and dont let it get you down.

We all have burned fingers, but scars heal. xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of the situations described happen in all walks of life, work colleagues, friends, relatives, they can all take your trust and betray you, its not just 'swing' relationships where it happens. I think the answe is how you react to it and deal with it, and you cant react or deal until you have experienced it. So treat every 'hurdle' as a learning curve and dont let it get you down.

We all have burned fingers, but scars heal. xx

"
its takes time scars to heal and you find yourself asking why .. when you don't know answers to things can drive you nuts.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

Erm .... do you know the bnp's _iews if so clearly she wouldn't to be involved with them!!!"

Why 'clearly' she wouldn't be involved in them?... One persons political _iews should never be assumed based on ones own ignorance.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *pecifically1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

"when a child is told not to touch a hot surface.. burnie burnie, they quickly learn.....

adults sometimes take longer and many, many, many more burnie burnie....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.

And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious

I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with.. "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

Not had any issues really since I started meeting. If I think someone is a bit too clingy or 'into' me they are gone.

I'm here for fun and nothing else. And I make that brutally clear.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread