FabSwingers.com forum: 80% of women chase 10% of men

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are we allowed to post links to studies on this forum? There’s some interesting reads on this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because some people have to cling on to any bizarre reason to explain why they can’t get a shag instead of understanding that it’s their fault and no one else’s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

Was the data gathered by Sydney University?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Are we allowed to post links to studies on this forum? There’s some interesting reads on this "

The forum rules (link at the top of every forum message box) list what it's acceptable to link from.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

I'm frequently amazed by the ability of some to believe a quote like this over the evidence of their own eyes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's known as the Pareto Principle (80/20) and applied to dating. I switched it to 10% because that's the stat I see cited here usually by men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules"

That’s a shame I doubt I’ll be able to send the links then, but it’s a pretty well studied thing I don’t think we can just dismiss it because you don’t like the idea anymore than we can say it’s 100% true because you can’t get laid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apparently 10% of men run slowly to get caught …. I’m actually sick of running

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Are only 10 to 20% of men in relationships or having sex? That's the question I asked myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules

How is it a well studied thing? I see no evidence of that. It's just referred to a lot as though it's fact!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules

How is it a well studied thing? I see no evidence of that. It's just referred to a lot as though it's fact! "

We’ll it’s a social phenomenon so you can’t prove it as fact, only study available info and take from it what you can

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stick on lippy and heels.

The ratios get proper messed up then!

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

Was the data gathered by Sydney University? "

So on other words it was unpublishable in a peer reviewed article.

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

It's usually quoted by the incel crowd to try to justify their bitterness.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I’ve read that for evolutionary biological reasons women only want to have sex with the very best men available to them but men want to sleep with any/all women.

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Women want someone like "him on the telly" or "in that film". They fawn over a actors, musicians, sportsmen etc even if in a relationship. On the upside, it makes us gents step up our game...I like a challenge!

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By *hinstrapMan
over a year ago

Barnsley

So what you saying......there is a chance I'll get a meet on here

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

Was the data gathered by Sydney University?

So on other words it was unpublishable in a peer reviewed article."

I have seen peer reviewed articles on other aspects of dating eg education level. Haven't come across anything relevant to the 80/20 principle.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Women want someone like "him on the telly" or "in that film". They fawn over a actors, musicians, sportsmen etc even if in a relationship. On the upside, it makes us gents step up our game...I like a challenge!"

Do we? All of us? And men don't fawn over celebs at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things"

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules

How is it a well studied thing? I see no evidence of that. It's just referred to a lot as though it's fact!

We’ll it’s a social phenomenon so you can’t prove it as fact, only study available info and take from it what you can "

But surely data from the big dating sites could be analysed properly. It's clearly recorded.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"https://m.fabswingers.com/content/forum-rules

How is it a well studied thing? I see no evidence of that. It's just referred to a lot as though it's fact!

We’ll it’s a social phenomenon so you can’t prove it as fact, only study available info and take from it what you can

But surely data from the big dating sites could be analysed properly. It's clearly recorded. "

They can, but you can’t make facts about social phenomena, especially something as complex and taboo as this subject. You’ll very likely struggling finding honest answer about what people really want

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law "

I see. Present company excluded of course but it seems to me to that very many men have an extremely low impression of women and see them as mercenary and incapable of actual love

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Really!

Have you read the almost daily threads by men about women news readers?

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

As Tinder is only new being only 10 years old and it takes at least 3 years to get research published (which many studies is too long for technology research), the figures may still be relevant.

None the less I fear this will be another "95% of all people who diet fail". This Spunkmyer et al research was in 1950s in an obesity clinic in the state of NY, with 100 participants.

It essence in the modern day the research is no longer relivent. But yet had gained an mythos and aura all of its own.

I fear that the '80% of women chase 10% of men' will gain this mythos well beyond the research (if it is at all scientific fact) relevancy.

In its slight defence however there is so called tindr 17% rule which dictates that 17% of men have more matches than the average Women. But this is based on mathematical proberbility and not on scientific fact.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I see. Present company excluded of course but it seems to me to that very many men have an extremely low impression of women and see them as mercenary and incapable of actual love"

Very many? Or just a vocal minority?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I see. Present company excluded of course but it seems to me to that very many men have an extremely low impression of women and see them as mercenary and incapable of actual love"

Weirdly, I almost had the same thought about women

But I try to remember that the “all men are trash” crowd are just a very bitter and loud minority and that most women aren’t nearly as upset and pessimistic

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

I don't believe the stats, but I also don't think it's that surprising that "good looking" men (by which I mean traditionally attractive or broadly appealing) would attract more attention on dating apps than men who aren't (or perhaps just don't present themselves as well). Same for women.

(I know attraction is subjective, and you'll always be attractive to someone - I'm speaking generally)

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

As Tinder is only new being only 10 years old and it takes at least 3 years to get research published (which many studies is too long for technology research), the figures may still be relevant.

None the less I fear this will be another "95% of all people who diet fail". This Spunkmyer et al research was in 1950s in an obesity clinic in the state of NY, with 100 participants.

It essence in the modern day the research is no longer relivent. But yet had gained an mythos and aura all of its own.

I fear that the '80% of women chase 10% of men' will gain this mythos well beyond the research (if it is at all scientific fact) relevancy.

Pareto 80/20 rule appears ,so often it can’t be ignored, it’s often more like 99/1.

Social science often has an agenda but the principles of the scientific method is valid - building on prev studies, acknowledging / combatting researcher bias, double blind studies , peer reviews etc so it’s not hard to evaluate good from bad science

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By *astandFeistyCouple
over a year ago

Bournemouth

I've seen this stat thrown around and whilst I have no idea if it's true or not.

In our relationship, I (male) am not necessarily attracted to 'beauty'(I know its a social construct), Mrs is defintely attracted to 'beauty'. Therefore, I will find more women attractive than she will men.

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Literally never heard that in my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women want me. I can’t have them all. Charge it to the game

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Literally never heard that in my life "

Me neither tbf

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Do we? All of us? And men don't fawn over celebs at all. "

Never, we're very respectful people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Women want me. I can’t have them all. Charge it to the game"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Women want me. I can’t have them all. Charge it to the game

Ok fine I will clarify. NOT ALL WOMEN

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Women want me. I can’t have them all. Charge it to the game

Ok fine I will clarify. NOT ALL WOMEN

No I meant can I be next in line

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By *osexyCouple
over a year ago

ST AUSTELL

Probably over thinking this maybe ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the same for both sexys

The mass 80% always chase the hot 10%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Women want me. I can’t have them all. Charge it to the game

Ok fine I will clarify. NOT ALL WOMEN

No I meant can I be next in line

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

There’s a typo in the thread title.

Surely it’s 80% of women chase men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There’s a typo in the thread title.

Surely it’s 80% of women chase men out of the kitchen with a broom. "

FTFY

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There’s a typo in the thread title.

Surely it’s 80% of women play kiss chasey with men. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I see. Present company excluded of course but it seems to me to that very many men have an extremely low impression of women and see them as mercenary and incapable of actual love

Very many? Or just a vocal minority? "

I don't know. I can only base my opinions on my own observations and experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

Exactly this is me. I prefer to kiss chase the 10%

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites. "

I swipe left on at least 99% of profiles on tinder when I open it.

Is there something wrong with only swiping right on people you're actually attracted to is more the question for me.

I know everyone claims the top 10% is the six pack six foot Adonis types. But they make up a lot less than 10% of the population. A lot of that top portion on there will be down to things like nice smiles, making an effort, presenting the most attractive version of their 'average' selves, surely?

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

Agreed.

Remember at school all the girls swooning over the hot guy.

Or all the lads fawning over the hot girls.

Rest of us may as well not existed.

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

There is one particular sexagenarian siren of the southern cliffs with whom I've been chasing in my mind's corridors of The Churchill Suite at Claridges. She won't buckle.

Otherwise it's 'nice' to be chased.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A statistical breakdown I've seen on Medium (can't post the links cos rules):

"A man of average attractiveness is “liked” by approximately 0.87% on women on Tinder. This is a whopping 1 in 115.

The average woman “likes” just 12% of men. However, this does not mean that every man is liked by 12% of women. If that were the case, the ratio of 1 in 115 would no longer be correct. In addition to the fact that women are extremely choosy, the likes are also very unevenly distributed.

You can say that the bottom 80% of men (in terms of attractiveness) compete for the bottom 20% of women.

The top 80% of women, on the other hand, all want the top 20% of men. "

BUT I am going to post next some analysis which disputes this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

Agreed.

Remember at school all the girls swooning over the hot guy.

Or all the lads fawning over the hot girls.

Rest of us may as well not existed."

Is it possible we have moved on since school??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Out of that 80% I’m probably attracted to about 10% after chatting probably about 5% obviously I won’t be for all of those either so that leaves 4.9999999%

Joking aside we should all just not overthink things, just relax and enjoy life and our time here … building friendships … getting to know other people, having some mutually fun experiences together … No pressure …. No expectations … To many seem far to focused on others I just focus on myself, those worth my time and me worth theirs … THE END

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please don’t call me arrogant because I believe what I’m saying is true.

If you find Black men attractive then I think I’m in that 10%

Man is peng you know. Come on.

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By *ovetolick78Man
over a year ago

The Shire

I'm just here for the sparking conversation.... Oh and the biscuits.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Out of that 80% I’m probably attracted to about 10% after chatting probably about 5% obviously I won’t be for all of those either so that leaves 4.9999999%

Can I humbly suggest that if you don't want to overthink things, my threads are not going to be your cup of tea?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please don’t call me arrogant because I believe what I’m saying is true.

If you find Black men attractive then I think I’m in that 10%

Man is peng you know. Come on. "

Stop using my thread to advertise your wares!

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"Stick on lippy and heels.

The ratios get proper messed up then! "

That's an anomaly. If we thought about that it would makes he maths hard.

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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago

Durham

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites.

I swipe left on at least 99% of profiles on tinder when I open it.

Is there something wrong with only swiping right on people you're actually attracted to is more the question for me.

I do not believe you’re finding 1% of the male population smiling in their photos on a dating site. They all just look like cats to me.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

But your original post was why does this exist? We know the answers it’s well researched - scarcity of eggs and number of fertile years, physical impact of pregnancy , number of times in a lifetime, they are a very scarce reproductive resource compared to men.

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

So if these dating stats are true - woman subconsciously view sex as baby making even in 2023 , and that impacts who they fancy and want sex with. They will wait for the best they can get rather than settle for any like many men.

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stick on lippy and heels.

The ratios get proper messed up then!

That's an anomaly. If we thought about that it would makes he maths hard. "

Maths?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"I do not believe you’re finding 1% of the male population smiling in their photos on a dating site. They all just look like cats to me. "

No, to be honest I'm more drawn by profile text than pictures personally. But that's considered irrelevant in these discussions I'm sure.

But, someone who presents as open and happy is more likely to catch my eye. Happy photos are more likely to make me look at the text in a positive light.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites.

I swipe left on at least 99% of profiles on tinder when I open it.

Is there something wrong with only swiping right on people you're actually attracted to is more the question for me.

I do not believe you’re finding 1% of the male population smiling in their photos on a dating site. They all just look like cats to me. "

Checking my hinge now in case I look like a cat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please don’t call me arrogant because I believe what I’m saying is true.

If you find Black men attractive then I think I’m in that 10%

Man is peng you know. Come on.

Stop using my thread to advertise your wares! "

Sally, you knew who I was when you married me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Biggest reason I think this isn’t entirely true is that by listening to the average guys experience on apps, and looking at how much success I have, I must be in the top 10%

But I’m 5’9 and extremely average looking.

So either the stars are misleading or the top 10% is a much lower barrier for entry that most guys realise

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Biggest reason I think this isn’t entirely true is that by listening to the average guys experience on apps, and looking at how much success I have, I must be in the top 10%

But I’m 5’9 and extremely average looking.

So either the stars are misleading or the top 10% is a much lower barrier for entry that most guys realise "

Or people assume that the 10% is the same for every woman. You know what they say about statistics...

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By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington

Oh the elite shaggers thing has come up again...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A statistical breakdown I've seen on Medium (can't post the links cos rules):

"A man of average attractiveness is “liked” by approximately 0.87% on women on Tinder. This is a whopping 1 in 115.

You can say that the bottom 80% of men (in terms of attractiveness) compete for the bottom 20% of women.

The top 80% of women, on the other hand, all want the top 20% of men. "

BUT I am going to post next some analysis which disputes this.

Male dating app users swipe indiscriminately, match with many and then unmatch. Women take the opposite strategy. They're selective at the outset where men are not. It's a different behaviour but the stats are based on the swiping.

The majority of users on dating apps are men (up to 90% for some apps). The data on women will as a result be less statistically variable than the data on men.

There is evidence that dating apps tend to show men women below their level of attractiveness. The reverse for women.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

Agreed.

Remember at school all the girls swooning over the hot guy.

Or all the lads fawning over the hot girls.

Rest of us may as well not existed.

Is it possible we have moved on since school??"

Don't be daft have you read some of the posts on here?

It's like a school playground at time's

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please don’t call me arrogant because I believe what I’m saying is true.

If you find Black men attractive then I think I’m in that 10%

Man is peng you know. Come on.

Stop using my thread to advertise your wares!

Sally, you knew who I was when you married me "

Sorry, hubster

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"But your original post was why does this exist? We know the answers it’s well researched - scarcity of eggs and number of fertile years, physical impact of pregnancy , number of times in a lifetime, they are a very scarce reproductive resource compared to men.

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites.

I swipe left on at least 99% of profiles on tinder when I open it.

Is there something wrong with only swiping right on people you're actually attracted to is more the question for me.

I do not believe you’re finding 1% of the male population smiling in their photos on a dating site. They all just look like cats to me. "

Cats holding big fish

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"Are we allowed to post links to studies on this forum? There’s some interesting reads on this "

The forum rules are ridiculously prohibitive on which links you can post, so probably not.

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By *itonthesideWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things"

Anecdotally based on my circle of friends, if they can’t find someone they think is worth it they just don’t bother dating at all.

I was single for 8 years before i met my current partner. I did date but only casually, I did have sex but occasionally and mostly through fab. Settling is something women had to do when they were not allowed bank accounts but its 2023 and there is no need to settle for something you don’t want / enjoy these days

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"It's usually quoted by the incel crowd to try to justify their bitterness.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"? "

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

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By *oecutterMan
over a year ago

Clonakilty

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

Whether the split is 80/10 or not I have no idea although I guarantee a disproportionately small number of men enjoy a disproportionately large amount of success.

We see the Pareto Principle everywhere. There are solid mathematical underpinnings of what it is and why it exists.

I'm in sales and marketing. The parallels with swinging, dating, and seduction are incredibly close (as we'd expect, because it's highly likely 'commerce' uses parts of the brain and psyche it's co-opted from our mating habits).

Incels and the like rail against the inevitable statistical distribution and seek to use intimidation, unpleasantness, and even threats to change it. Unfortunately for them, we're looking at an example of a complex adaptive system, and it can't be controlled in a top-down fashion as they'd like.

In the end, they can't change the numbers but they can choose which group they're in.

Men in the "10% group" understand how to present themselves in a way women in general are more likely to find attractive; the "90% group" send dick pics and feel they're entitled to sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think what most men are missing on Fab is that only a small proportion of guys here meet the minimum levels for women to be interested.

The majority have no photos and if there are pics they're cock pics. Little text. Wide age range 18-99. Unappealing usernames. Send crappy messages. Send unsolicited cock pics. Post unsavoury status updates. Etc etc

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By *itonthesideWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"So, the average person isn't attractive to 80% of people?

That sounds about right to me.

I'm not compatible with a lot more than 80% of people

No, no it's just women. Not the average person. Women on dating sites.

I swipe left on at least 99% of profiles on tinder when I open it.

Is there something wrong with only swiping right on people you're actually attracted to is more the question for me.

I agree with all of this and then the visual is just step 1 for the match. There are many other things that drive or wipe out attraction once you start chatting

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By *itonthesideWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

Not even close to the truth in my child free circle. A vasectomy is a prized possession

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

I have seen multiple researches about it. Maybe 10% is a bit exaggerated. But I believe the idea is true to an extent. In a "traditional" relationship, women sacrifice a lot compared to men, especially if there is a baby involved.

In a patriarchal society, women were forced to marry as many of them didn't have jobs. That's not the case anymore. Now most women can look after themselves. So they get into a relationship only if they feel that the sacrifices they end up doing are worth it. If not, they are better off being single.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer no cheese on my burger

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I prefer no cheese on my burger "

Thanks so much for sharing

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By *oecutterMan
over a year ago

Clonakilty

"I think what most men are missing on Fab is that only a small proportion of guys here meet the minimum levels for women to be interested. "

Yup. And this is one reason the stats are the way they are.

There IS a mathematical explanation for all of this. Pareto is an example of a "power law distribution".

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have seen multiple researches about it. Maybe 10% is a bit exaggerated. But I believe the idea is true to an extent. In a "traditional" relationship, women sacrifice a lot compared to men, especially if there is a baby involved.

How do the sacrifices women make relate to attractiveness on dating apps? Or do you mean women choosing on the basis of wealth/status?

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on. "

There’s a massive body of knowledge on this. Starting from historic work by Darwin. Unfortunately You can’t post linked to scientific research here it’s against the rules but if you have ATHENS login you can read it all for free online.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

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By *oitering-With-intentMan
over a year ago

city of Lodon

I think in real life vs online things are very different.

Online you can portray yourself several different ways but in erosn it is harder to appear different to how you really are.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

80% of statistics are made up

Same difference.

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

"Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Language Timothy

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Language Timothy"

I’m not even being a Dick!

This is me exercising huge restraint

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Because 90% of men live in domestic Acscia Avenue and dream of moving on. 10% don’t live in Acadia Ave perhaps? ??

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

[Removed by poster at 23/09/23 12:05:07]

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By *thfloorCouple
over a year ago

Hove

For the people who want to share links:

Please post the title of the article or study you want to share, or a distinct sentence from it. Quotation marks around the title or quote will almost always return the intended link on Google.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

How do the sacrifices women make relate to attractiveness on dating apps? Or do you mean women choosing on the basis of wealth/status?"

It could be a multitude of things including physical attraction, common values and maybe wealth/status too. As for how it translates to attractiveness on dating apps, if a woman anyway has a choice to stay single(a choice many women didn't have in patriarchal societies), they would be more choosy. Even a small part of the profile that gives signal that the guy is potentially a douche bag would put them off. Women would rather stay single than to make sacrifices and put up with men like them.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct "

The only way you liberate your mind , my understanding how and it works that way, then you have real freedom to choose/change

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct

The only way you liberate your mind , my understanding how and it works that way, then you have real freedom to choose/change "

There’s a good book on this

The chimp paradox

Learning to separate your instincts and emotions from your higher thinking so that you can make the best choices for yourself

Would recommend

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By *itonthesideWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct

The only way you liberate your mind , my understanding how and it works that way, then you have real freedom to choose/change "

I don’t think anyone is denying the biological urge to pro create. We all know hormones exist. But the global birth rate has roughly halved in the last 50 years so I think its fair conclusion to draw that in current society, the standard rules of millions of years of evolution don’t necessarily apply with the same power they had before.

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By *thfloorCouple
over a year ago

Hove

The inherent flaw of daring apps like tinder is set on the premise of physical attraction. Here starts an inequality because women have been objectified through the centuries and men haven't. Men need to catch up and learn how to take a good selfie, that doesn't make them look like a murderer. Unfortunately there is no blueprint of how to display the male body.

To make things worse, typically women are not drawn to looks (nature/nurture, don't really care). Most women I know can't decide if a man is attractive to them just by looking at a couple of badly taken pics.

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By *oitering-With-intentMan
over a year ago

city of Lodon

Claus Wedekind did a study on pheromones.

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

"The inherent flaw of daring apps like tinder is set on the premise of physical attraction. Here starts an inequality because women have been objectified through the centuries and men haven't. Men need to catch up and learn how to take a good selfie, that doesn't make them look like a murderer. Unfortunately there is no blueprint of how to display the male body.

I have actually heard it from couple of women. Men tend to make terrible choices when it comes to pictures for dating apps. That might also explain the numerous men here thinking that sending dick picture as intro message is cool

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct

The only way you liberate your mind , my understanding how and it works that way, then you have real freedom to choose/change

There’s a good book on this

The chimp paradox

Learning to separate your instincts and emotions from your higher thinking so that you can make the best choices for yourself

Would recommend "

Heard mixed reviews. Sapiens is good but harder reading.

But I think in principle understanding through education, meditation. spirituality, then you know why you do what you do and can choose a different program

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

I could easily think that at least 50% of men effectively remove themselves from the running order. Look at all the profiles on here with a black silhouette, no photos or just photos of a penis over a toilet bowl, "will fill in later", and a name like Vag Splitter. Not just nothing to attract anyone, but good reasons to actively avoid.

Then go out to a pub or a restaurant. The vast majority of women are dressed to look good, wearing makeup, obvious effort no matter what type of style they are affecting (casual or smart, hollywood or punk, it's still a "look" that doesn't happen by accident). But too many of the men are wearing grey, baggy, first thing that came to hand, sportswear... Not necessarily scruffy or unclean, but no effort at looking good, no effort to be different, just interchangeable with all the others in the same socio-economic group. Absolutely nothing to make themselves more attractive a choice than any other man.

The men that do something to look different, that act apart, that have a style - at least they get noticed, whether for good or for bad. They might be seen as "wow" or as "urghh", but they are not just part of the background sea of indifference.

Just my view on things anyway. Polly xxx

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

men have unlimited supply of eggs and more years and can plant them easily in multiple women

I don’t believe everyone is like this personally , because you find many men that aren’t promiscuous and many women that are

We don't know the answers. There isn't enough data. The data hasn't been analysed properly. And its 2023, perhaps we can move on from "eggs are scarce"?

Sure you can deny the scientific explanations and read articles written by marketing graduates working for dating apps

Happy to read a scientific explanation if you share one here. If you just want to be a dick, move on.

Women's greater selectivity in mate choice ultimately stems from the sexual asymmetry in reproductive biology, which has remained constant for millions of years.

Sorry if it’s not what you want to believe !

I think upsetting to some to realise that “free will” might not be as free as they want to believe and all our thoughts and actions are influenced by millions of years of evolution and instinct

The only way you liberate your mind , my understanding how and it works that way, then you have real freedom to choose/change

Unfortunately evolution of the brain is far slower than societal change. These things remain constant over millions of years.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

For example, almost all people still eat in excess sugar and fat. Sugar is the energy fat is the warmth in winter. Storing it in our bodies used to be the best thing to do a very, very long time ago.

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By *oitering-With-intentMan
over a year ago

city of Lodon

There are tons of data online showing what to pit on your profile and what types of pictures to use.

Even percentages showing the differences.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"I could easily think that at least 50% of men effectively remove themselves from the running order. Look at all the profiles on here with a black silhouette, no photos or just photos of a penis over a toilet bowl, "will fill in later", and a name like Vag Splitter. Not just nothing to attract anyone, but good reasons to actively avoid.

Just my view on things anyway. Polly xxx"

Love this Polly

It’s so true

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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 23/09/23 12:36:28]

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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

"Probably over thinking this maybe ?"
This

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

Just my view on things anyway. Polly xxx"

I reluctantly agreee with it

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By *itonthesideWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

" Unfortunately evolution of the brain is far slower than societal change. These things remain constant over millions of years "

I don’t agree that they even need to keep pace for it to matter. I would argue that society and our peers are just as strong an influence on our decisions as evolution, if not more. And now with the way media works , what we perceive as society but its actually a curated algorithm echo chamber has an even stronger pull again.

Just look at how fast viral trends take off that are in conflict with our natural instincts. Throwing iced water over ourselves which is i guess just mildly uncomfortable but unusual for a species that seeks shelter and warmth. It’s not the type of thing you would see other mammals do. (Much like other mammals dont have sex for recreation)

And eating tide pods, and crisps hot enough to kill us, spoonfuls of cinnamon despite seeing the videos of people almost choking to death. These are all in conflict with evolution wanting us to survive.

These are all examples of stupidity sure, but also examples that we are more than just our base human instincts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are only 10 to 20% of men in relationships or having sex? That's the question I asked myself "

Even if they are, they are often on here looking for a fuck.

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

Is there a reverse stat that a percentage of men would chase a percentage of women?

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Maybe because 10% of men actually make an effort with their dating profiles so the ladies take interest over the other 90% of shite profiles.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a reverse stat that a percentage of men would chase a percentage of women? "

Yeah, 100% of men would chase 100% of women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because as far as we know, it's true.

As sallyforth pointed out it's called the Pareto principle, it doesn't only appear in dating, but all walks of life, economics, politics, physics, it's just one of those freaky things that keeps popping up, like the golden ratio.

Back to dating though, the claim is supported by statistics provided by Match . com in the 2000's and more recently by an aggregate of Tinder, Bumble and PoF, ( I think ).

80/20 is just a rough average, the figures can be higher or lower depending on the site. Interestingly, despite Bumble giving more power to women, Bumble's ratio was closer to 90/10.

*Why* this happens is much harder to say, some have pointed to studies on how men and women rate attractiveness in the opposite sex, with men plotting women on an almost perfect bell curve, whereas women tend to skew to to the top 10-20% of men. Others have suggested it's just natural selection at work.

There are some caveats though, we can't say it this phenomenon extends past dating app/ sites, and of course these companies don't know when people have actually had sex, only when they've matched. The data ( typically ) only applies to younger people looking mainly for sex ( teens to mid 40's say ) and not to when people are settling down and looking for a life partner. Plus these sites often withhold features behind a paywall, which only a certain percentage ( yes, you guessed it ) pay for.

Detractors may say this is just used by incels to make themselves feel better, or to justify shitty behaviour, and they may well do. Some say that they made it up entirely, but 1. Incels make up a insignificant percentage of the population, and 2. Incels don't get to create the statistics, literally... by definition!

Obviously I haven't given links because I can't, so your going to have to either believe / disbelieve me, or look it up for yourselves. Not that the sort of people who ask for peer reviewed papers have actually ever read one ( not that I blame them, they're often hard to get hold of and fucking boring to read ).

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

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By *evilmancoolMan
over a year ago

london

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because as far as we know, it's true.

Back to dating though, the claim is supported by statistics provided by Match . com in the 2000's and more recently by an aggregate of Tinder, Bumble and PoF, ( I think ).

80/20 is just a rough average, the figures can be higher or lower depending on the site. Interestingly, despite Bumble giving more power to women, Bumble's ratio was closer to 90/10.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

I’ve read loads of peer reviewed papers

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

"Is there a reverse stat that a percentage of men would chase a percentage of women?

Yeah, 100% of men would chase 100% of women

That's not true!

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

Mods should publish these stats for fab

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By *oitering-With-intentMan
over a year ago

city of Lodon

The lobster research that Jordan Perterson talks about could explain the pareto principle when it is applied to dating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve read loads of peer reviewed papers

Sorry, that wasn't aimed at anyone on the thread, please don't think I was having a go at you.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

"Because as far as we know, it's true.

Back to dating though, the claim is supported by statistics provided by Match . com in the 2000's and more recently by an aggregate of Tinder, Bumble and PoF, ( I think ).

80/20 is just a rough average, the figures can be higher or lower depending on the site. Interestingly, despite Bumble giving more power to women, Bumble's ratio was closer to 90/10.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

I’ve read loads of peer reviewed papers

I read The Bridport and Lyme Regis News, does that count

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

As Tinder is only new being only 10 years old and it takes at least 3 years to get research published (which many studies is too long for technology research), the figures may still be relevant.

None the less I fear this will be another "95% of all people who diet fail". This Spunkmyer et al research was in 1950s in an obesity clinic in the state of NY, with 100 participants.

It essence in the modern day the research is no longer relivent. But yet had gained an mythos and aura all of its own.

I fear that the '80% of women chase 10% of men' will gain this mythos well beyond the research (if it is at all scientific fact) relevancy.

Pareto 80/20 rule appears ,so often it can’t be ignored, it’s often more like 99/1.

I don't think social science has agenda but I do belive that grevence studies a section of so ial justice studies do h she. Which is not a negative providing that a full scientific riggor has been applied.

Hello pluckrose a Femernist who has with male colleagues looked to show caces

in this field where bad science is evidently rampart.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

It's possibly relatively true in situations like Fab and Tinder where there are considerably one sided gender representation and a bias for physical based attractions rather than personality based.

Cal

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

" Unfortunately evolution of the brain is far slower than societal change. These things remain constant over millions of years

These are all examples of stupidity sure, but also examples that we are more than just our base human instincts. "

There are some big differences of these influences , if you think how the storing of excess fat and sugar in our bodies materialises - we know we don’t need it, we know the cupboard or supermarket is a much better place to keep it safe for winter now, but the brain hasn’t evolved it doing it’s own thing in spite of seeing the fridge, cupboard and supermarket daily , it’s still playing safe and storing fat for winter inside us !

How ? it uses ‘taste’ buds to trick us. There’s a reason cake and ice cream tastes so good to us - it’s not flavourings - it’s that’s it made of fat and sugar.

Outs tastes are often controlled by things we can’t fathom

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I’ve read some bollocks in my time and this is right up there

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Do women actually chase men?

I'm going to hazard a guess that a small percentage of women chase the 10% of men, because the men are extremely handsome and/or rich.

Fuck knows how humanity is still going strong if we're all chasing the same men.

So, when these women fail to bag one of the top 10% of men are they settling for second, third, fourth etc best?

I think it's a load of crap if the data is from dating sites.

They should state that On dating sites it's 80% of women swiping right on 10% of men.

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

"Stick on lippy and heels.

The ratios get proper messed up then! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The lobster research that Jordan Perterson talks about could explain the pareto principle when it is applied to dating. "

Wasn't that Phoebe Buffay.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"The lobster research that Jordan Perterson talks about could explain the pareto principle when it is applied to dating.

Wasn't that Phoebe Buffay."

I think he discredits science tbh having a phd doesn’t make you a good scientist , he brakes so many principles, the Jain not not acknowledging his own bias or doing anything about it in his own research

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

"The lobster research that Jordan Perterson talks about could explain the pareto principle when it is applied to dating.

Wasn't that Phoebe Buffay."

You sure? The paper had the name Regina Phalange on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The lobster research that Jordan Perterson talks about could explain the pareto principle when it is applied to dating.

Wasn't that Phoebe Buffay.

You sure? The paper had the name Regina Phalange on it."

exquisite execution here

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By *oxesMan
over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

It's possibly relatively true in situations like Fab and Tinder where there are considerably one sided gender representation and a bias for physical based attractions rather than personality based.

Cal"

You kind of see it in gorrila behaviour where there is really one male who autocratically decides who mates with who.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

It's possibly relatively true in situations like Fab and Tinder where there are considerably one sided gender representation and a bias for physical based attractions rather than personality based.

Cal

You kind of see it in gorrila behaviour where there is really one male who autocratically decides who mates with who."

We're not gorillas though.

Or lobsters, prawns, horny toads or head lice.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

It's possibly relatively true in situations like Fab and Tinder where there are considerably one sided gender representation and a bias for physical based attractions rather than personality based.

Cal

You kind of see it in gorrila behaviour where there is really one male who autocratically decides who mates with who.

We're not gorillas though.

Or lobsters, prawns, horny toads or head lice."

Head lice!

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist?

It's possibly relatively true in situations like Fab and Tinder where there are considerably one sided gender representation and a bias for physical based attractions rather than personality based.

Cal

You kind of see it in gorrila behaviour where there is really one male who autocratically decides who mates with who.

We're not gorillas though.

Or lobsters, prawns, horny toads or head lice."

Oh I don't know. I sometimes doubt evolution has happened reading some posts...

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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London

Why does it not go away you mean? Simply because it's true. Women are way more selective than men. Proven over and over and over again. Nothing wrong with that, but it's just how things are.

Men need to impress and stand out to get laid, and women need to make sure they don't pick psychos and liars from the lot.

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By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

I only get chased these days they get a shock when i stop running and the fly right by before i put a rocket up there anus

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the other way around here!!

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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London

"It's the other way around here!!

Ehhh 100% not

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By *Bag69Man
over a year ago

Derby

I'm absolutely willing to get caught. I'm not even pretending to run anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankfully, some will settle for the lower 20%. God bless the sammich maker.

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

It sounds like someone heard of the Pareto Principle and tried to apply it to this site. Sounds like pure guesswork by whoever came up with the numbers though, because how could this idea even be measured? Do you really think the owners of this site are attempting such deep data analysis?

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

"Do women actually chase men?

I'm going to hazard a guess that a small percentage of women chase the 10% of men, because the men are extremely handsome and/or rich.

Fuck knows how humanity is still going strong if we're all chasing the same men.

So, when these women fail to bag one of the top 10% of men are they settling for second, third, fourth etc best?

I think it's a load of crap if the data is from dating sites.

They should state that On dating sites it's 80% of women swiping right on 10% of men.

Imagine that, like the health warnings on cigarettes. Just above the subscribe and pay button, WARNINGS 80% OF WOMEN SWIPE 10% OF GUYS

It sounds like some more research is definitely needed. But even if things aren't a dramatic as this study states I think anecdotally there's some truth in the dating trends that most of us recognise. Which is only logical really. Although taste is subjective there's always going to be traits that are commonly more desirable than others. Some men have these more than others (or at least are good with advertising). Mixed with women being like likely to settle (or settle again).

Also I think online dating changes and distorts the game some what. I think there are guys who get over looked by women who if they bumped into them in person would actually find some chemistry. The swipe left/right method is incredibly superficial. Likewise there's guys out there who know the winning formula online but in the real world turn out not to be all they were cracked up to be. When you remove that personal interaction and make it a game of an online sales pitch it changes the inputs that someone has to go off when making a decision. There's a similar element to this in the fab world too. I think it would be better for everyone if they would make the effort to seek others in the real world rather than from behind a phone screen (get it not that simple).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tinder and fab are quite different apps, so while the quote is cute it's not exactly applicable here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are only 10 to 20% of men in relationships or having sex? That's the question I asked myself "

Those are the ones I generally attract especially in the dating world

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sorry peeps, had a short holiday

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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London

"It sounds like someone heard of the Pareto Principle and tried to apply it to this site. Sounds like pure guesswork by whoever came up with the numbers though, because how could this idea even be measured? Do you really think the owners of this site are attempting such deep data analysis?"

Well, the way they measured this was by various polls and then also the swiping habits on tinder

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tinder and fab are quite different apps, so while the quote is cute it's not exactly applicable here

And yet, I see it cited a lot on Fab. It was cited the day that I started this thread - that's what prompted me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just read the rules on sites you can post links to. Under recognised news outlets it has News of the World...

When was this last updated. NOTW ceased in 2011.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…"

Yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just read the rules on sites you can post links to. Under recognised news outlets it has News of the World...

When was this last updated. NOTW ceased in 2011."

I think you have your answer

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

Yes "

If we believe the theory!

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

Yes "

Just asking I used to be in the percentage that women were attracted to .can I have my place back .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

Yes

Just asking I used to be in the percentage that women were attracted to .can I have my place back ."

If you pay fluffy a large sum of cash...

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Sorry peeps, had a short holiday

Welcome back

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

Yes

Just asking I used to be in the percentage that women were attracted to .can I have my place back .

If you pay fluffy a large sum of cash..."

Fluffy like me any chance of discount

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry peeps, had a short holiday

Welcome back

Cheeky

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law "

I believe the figure is 1 in 10 children cannot be their legal father"s child, based on blood types.

I think the adjustments for matching blood groups makes it 1 in 7

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I believe the figure is 1 in 10 children cannot be their legal father"s child, based on blood types.

I think the adjustments for matching blood groups makes it 1 in 7"

I know my father was my real father every time I look in the bathroom mirror at the age I am now he's bleedy starring back out at me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I believe the figure is 1 in 10 children cannot be their legal father"s child, based on blood types.

I think the adjustments for matching blood groups makes it 1 in 7

I know my father was my real father every time I look in the bathroom mirror at the age I am now he's bleedy starring back out at me."

Are you French?

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"So are these 10/20% of men rushing about helping these 80% of women out or are loads of women giving up and settling for second best? I need to know these things

The idea is they’ll settle for the best they can get but they’ll jump ship for more

Why that’s any different to men I dunno

Weirdly, France has made private paternity tests illegal to “preserve the peace of families”. How many people are raising kids that aren’t there’s that France had to make a law

I believe the figure is 1 in 10 children cannot be their legal father"s child, based on blood types.

I think the adjustments for matching blood groups makes it 1 in 7

I know my father was my real father every time I look in the bathroom mirror at the age I am now he's bleedy starring back out at me.

Are you French? "

Some days I can be some days

I can be Irish other days I'm just me depends on what amuses the lady at the time oh ee ho oh ee ho

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I see this quoted such a lot here. Based on some Tinder data from donkeys years ago.

Why does it persist? "

Is there any reason to suspect that women have changed their behaviour since the Tinder data was published? Tinder is a relatively modern invention, so any change would have to be very recent if the data no longer applies.

I am not familiar with the Tinder data. However, I am aware of data published by one of the other very large online dating platforms. This data has been reported to indicate that 'women rate an incredible 80% of guys as worse-looking than medium'. Of course that doesn't automatically mean that women would never give those 80% of men a chance, but it does indicate who they are most and least likely to chase or respond positively to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Further to my recent post, the same dataset shows that male appraisal of female attractiveness is similar in shape to a symmetrical bell curve (a 'normal distribution', for those who are into statistics). That is to say, the majority of females are rated as medium level of attractiveness, and females rated as low and high attractiveness are the minorities.

The female appraisal of male attractiveness does not follow a normal distribution. Rather, it is like one half of a normal distribution, as 80% of males are considered by females to be medium or lower attractiveness. It's like the females shifted the entire bell curve leftwards, so that medium attractiveness males are a minority, least attractive males are the majority, and highly attractive males are an extreme minority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's against forum rules to post links, so I hope it will be acceptable to state that anyone who wants to view the data analysis I mentioned in the previous two posts should search for 'Your Looks and Your Inbox Christian Rudder'.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's against forum rules to post links, so I hope it will be acceptable to state that anyone who wants to view the data analysis I mentioned in the previous two posts should search for 'Your Looks and Your Inbox Christian Rudder'."

I'm reading it now, but I also saw this article which is...intriguing. Christian Rudder acknowledging that OkCupid experimented on users.

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/jul/29/okcupid-experiment-human-beings-dating

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You can post from news sites and YouTube.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does this mean that 90% of men are undesirable to 80% of women?…

Yes "

Thank goodness that’s only a fab women thing..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm reading it now, but I also saw this article which is...intriguing. Christian Rudder acknowledging that OkCupid experimented on users.

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/jul/29/okcupid-experiment-human-beings-dating"

At universities, social science experiments have to be passed by some kind of ethics board before research can begin.

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By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

"Sorry peeps, had a short holiday

"
girls in shorts is no bad thing

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London

Damn being at the 11th percentage!

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

I'm on tinder and there are thousands of women. I think the most common thing the 40 plus are looking for is honesty reliability and shared interests.

If the pareto rule applies maybe it's because only 20 per cent of guys have those attributes and 80 per cent of woman want them..

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