FabSwingers.com forum: I’ve just heard

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?

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By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

He looks like a bag of milk i do like

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Your presence here is like a fork in a bowl of soup ..

Not required

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A pussy like a bag of smashed crabs haha

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By *iscreetAndFreakyMan
over a year ago

walsall

as sharp as a marble they are

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Your life has been a huge waste of sperm and egg

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

"A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?"

Not yet but I know its coming lol

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

North West

If he was any thicker, he'd clot.

Is a favourite of mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I heard the expression "a new personal worst" for something done in a particularly slow time.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

If wit was shit you'd be constipated...

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

On an army officers appraisal:

His men will follow him anywhere if only out of curiosity.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

When insulting other drivers who pull out without indicating.... just pull out why don't you, it's a pity your father didn't.... came up with that one myself lol

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

Now Fluffly as you might know I try nit to offend but I know a few insults.

Here you go

You’re the reason God created the middle finger.

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

"If wit was shit you'd be constipated...

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

This is the one I save for the most needed occassion.

You’re a gray sprinkle on a rainbow cupcake.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hanging around like a fart in a space station!!

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

Lol

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Now Fluffly as you might know I try nit to offend but I know a few insults.

Here you go

You’re the reason God created the middle finger."
omg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“He’s as useful as a chocolate teapot” is a personal favourite of mine

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

He's 10lb of shit in a 5lb bag.

I'm going to call him 'thrush' from now on, cos he's an irritating c_#t!

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

How many licks until I get to the interesting part of this conversation?

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

"Now Fluffly as you might know I try nit to offend but I know a few insults.

Here you go

You’re the reason God created the middle finger.omg

I know

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"He's 10lb of shit in a 5lb bag.

I'm going to call him 'thrush' from now on, cos he's an irritating c_#t!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Fuckinell I’m crying here

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By *m NormalMan
over a year ago

Telford

Semi useful junction that I and no one else wants. Just cannot bring myself to bin it

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"Fuckinell I’m crying here

I'm trying my damndest not to look like a loony on the bus laughing to myself

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail."

Lmfao

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

"A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?"

My dad used to describe the Police as so low they could crawl under a

snake's belly in a top hat.

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

"You have so many gaps in your teeth it looks like your tongue is in jail.

Lmfao "

**takes a bow** I could fill this thread. I have so many bottled up

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?

My dad used to describe the Police as so low they could crawl under a

snake's belly in a top hat. "

I want to know who was wearing the top hat, the police or the snake

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

She looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp, was a favourite of mine

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

Wow, your maker really didn’t waste time giving you a personality, huh?

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

One of my faves I learned recently:

‘He’s that unlucky he’d fall into a bag of tits and come out sucking his thumb’

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By *illan-KillashMan
over a year ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants

"A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?"

1 - When the good lord was dealing out looks, he thought he said books and asked for something by Stephen King.

2 - Looks like he's been bobbing for chips in a deep fat fryer.

That the kind of thing?

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

I also like:

‘Looks like he brushed his hair with a pork chop’ and ‘a shirt that looks like it’s been ironed with a wok’

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

The next time you roll your eyes can you look for your brain

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By *1966Man
over a year ago

horsham

"He is as useful as an handbrake in a canoe"

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

Grab a straw, because you suck

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By *1966Man
over a year ago

horsham

A face only a mother can love

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

If I had a face like yours I’d stand on my hands and teach my arse to speak.

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

He could eat an apple through a letterbox

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By *eliciousDiva69Woman
over a year ago

Schitts Creek

I don’t have the time or crayons to explain it to you

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

He was at the front of the queue when they were handing out good looks.

Look what he got for pushing in.

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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

I would prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed.

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By *ohnywrongunMan
over a year ago

Epping

Ringpiece like a rusty bullet hole

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By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

I'm not saying you're fat but it looks like you were poured into your clothes and forgot to say "when"

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

You’re a useful as a glass hammer

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

I quite like the age old

What does your village do for an idiot when you’re out of town.

And the simplicity of

Don’t be a c*nt all your life.

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By *ee04Man
over a year ago

Essex

You can’t fixe stupid.

About as useful as,

Tits on a nun.

Hand break on a speed boat.

An ash tray on a motorbike.

Well when you fell out the ugly tree you must have hit every branch on the way down.

Oxygen thief.

Hey I thought I saw a loaf of bread named after you in the supermarket the other day, but then when I looked closely it said “Thick cut”

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I generally don't hurl insults at people

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By *coobyABCMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

If you want my cum back, get it from your mums teeth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I generally don't hurl insults at people "

not worth the hastle and achieves nothing

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Your mother should’ve swallowed you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I also like:

‘Looks like he brushed his hair with a pork chop’ and ‘a shirt that looks like it’s been ironed with a wok’

Used the pork chop one on my son This morning

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By *ullmanMan
over a year ago

hull

About as much use as an ashtray on a motor bike

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By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON

"One of my faves I learned recently:

‘He’s that unlucky he’d fall into a bag of tits and come out sucking his thumb’

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By *r Black 85Man
over a year ago

nottingham

He couldn't play dead in a horror movie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I generally don't hurl insults at people "

Neither do I but we all think them quietly.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"The next time you roll your eyes can you look for your brain

Lmao!

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"I would prefer a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed."

Your on form today _nitter.

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Google searching 'best cricket sledges' will bring up some good ones.

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By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Looks like mutton dressed as lizard always made me chuckle

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By *cotsguyyMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I heard someone describe Rishi Sunak as a turtle on a fence post.

Noone knows how he got there but you know for sure he has no idea what to do next.

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"A face like a hat full of arseholes."

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By *oot toyMan
over a year ago

Portchester

One I like to use is….”you’re a crusty cum stain”

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Thunder cunt is my personal favourite this week

It suited the person perfectly

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

Fuck when you fell out ugly tree even the roots kick you

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

If that cunt had dynamite as brains he would not have enough to blow his nose

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

Mirrors can't talk lucky for you they can't laugh either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An old lady friend of mine one day turned to me and pointed to a man walking down the street:

She said:

"See that bastard there; he really sickens my pish".

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By *orYourThighsOnlyMan
over a year ago

Midlands

He’s that mean he’s take the butter off your bread. And milk out your tea. Lol

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I loved Terrance Stamp in Priscilla Queen of the Desert when he said, "Why don't you light up your tampon and blow up your box, 'coz that's the only bang you'll ever get!"

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

The people that tolerate you on a daily basis are true hero's

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By *aughtyLisa341Woman
over a year ago

Ripley

But my simple one is .

Sorry earth's full go home

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

"A great insult: ‘an overused teabag of a man’

Anyone else heard anything creative lately?"

I love that, but been wracking my brain about how I could use it in conversation without sounding like Julian Clarey, which is okay if you are him.

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

"There's a village out there somewhere that's missing its idiot"

LvM

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

"I also like:

‘Looks like he brushed his hair with a pork chop’ and ‘a shirt that looks like it’s been ironed with a wok’

These made me laugh out loud. Who said them?

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

You must have hit every branch falling down the ugly tree!!

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

"I generally don't hurl insults at people

Neither do I but we all think them quietly.

I'm an unc*nsci*us eye-roller. I just can't stop it.

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

Rough as a badgers crotch.

As pretty as a sack of mouldy tatoes.

Oxfordshire country bumpkin phrases. Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I heard someone describe Rishi Sunak as a turtle on a fence post.

Noone knows how he got there but you know for sure he has no idea what to do next.

That’s a clear winner

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