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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I'd have no idea if anyone from here was "stable" plus being stable would vary person to person under what they consider stable.

I'm after sex not someone's financial/settled/stable status.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd have no idea if anyone from here was "stable" plus being stable would vary person to person under what they consider stable.

I'm after sex not someone's financial/settled/stable status.

Mrs "

As am I

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…"

^ This. If someone could fill in a ticksheet and say if they display signs of paranoia, jealousy, unhinged behaviour, anger issues, gaslighting etc etc that would be great.

I don't mind so much financial stability as long as it's not expected that I'll pay for everything.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…"

Yeah I’d question the mental stability of some haha but also from browsing forums there are hints to advertising wealth and stature of individuals through their words hence brain dump

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…

^ This. If someone could fill in a ticksheet and say if they display signs of paranoia, jealousy, unhinged behaviour, anger issues, gaslighting etc etc that would be great.

I don't mind so much financial stability as long as it's not expected that I'll pay for everything."

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh "

Stable just means un-changing... they could be stable and still be a complete train-wreck in every way.

Cal

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

I’m not sure if this counts but if there are signs of drama, I’m off.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m not sure if this counts but if there are signs of drama, I’m off."

Ditto, I don’t do drama or BS

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh "

You'll never tell from a bio. Often you won't even be able to tell from a message, an ongoing chat or even an initial F2F meet.

It takes time for people to get to know each other and for you to establish any potential issues.

So if all you're looking for is a quick meet for physical interaction, then I guess it matters less. You'll have parted ways soon enough and if any of those concerning characteristics rear their head moving on you can easily block (on and off site) and avoid.

And if you like things to move slowly you've time enough to make a decision on what becomes apparent and cut ties if necessary.

Depends entirely on your approach to Fab I guess.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh

You'll never tell from a bio. Often you won't even be able to tell from a message, an ongoing chat or even an initial F2F meet.

It takes time for people to get to know each other and for you to establish any potential issues.

So if all you're looking for is a quick meet for physical interaction, then I guess it matters less. You'll have parted ways soon enough and if any of those concerning characteristics rear their head moving on you can easily block (on and off site) and avoid.

And if you like things to move slowly you've time enough to make a decision on what becomes apparent and cut ties if necessary.

Depends entirely on your approach to Fab I guess."

Oh my approach to fab is as it is for many which is meet lovely people and possibly find a unicorn in the process

I just had a thought and decided to dump it here for the fab world to see

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By *oecutterMan
over a year ago

Clonakilty


"

You'll never tell from a bio. Often you won't even be able to tell from a message, an ongoing chat or even an initial F2F meet.

"

I disagree. The line of work I’m in means there are red flags for many of the character traits (often mental health issues) people present immediately - enough to tell me I don’t want to engage with them.

Word choice, attitudes, stuff like that.

Is it perfect? No. But it’s pretty accurate after 20 years.

And the same experience works here (and experience is all it is).

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Bios tell me what They want me to know. I have no control over it and I guess that's where the risk factor comes into play, all I can do is try to safe guard myself x

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"

You'll never tell from a bio. Often you won't even be able to tell from a message, an ongoing chat or even an initial F2F meet.

I disagree. The line of work I’m in means there are red flags for many of the character traits (often mental health issues) people present immediately - enough to tell me I don’t want to engage with them.

Word choice, attitudes, stuff like that.

Is it perfect? No. But it’s pretty accurate after 20 years.

And the same experience works here (and experience is all it is).

"

And that's fine.

I refer to my experiences, nobody else's. I've generally made good decisions over the time I've been here, but still been surprised by how people have turned out to be further down the line.

You can think you're a good judge of people and still be wrong, because people are good at hiding things they don't want you to see or know.

That's the same in real life as it is on Fab, and always will be.

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

How would you know just from a profile and a few messages if they are stable in life as you put it.

As I/we are not looking to start a relationship with anybody we meet we are just looking for attraction and a like mindedness. That is probably going to mean we are attracted to those who are more financially stable and settled in life but you never can tell.

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By *oecutterMan
over a year ago

Clonakilty


"

and still be wrong, "

Which is why I said it wasn’t perfect.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to think they were mentally stable to a degree. The rest doesn't bother me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…

^ This. If someone could fill in a ticksheet and say if they display signs of paranoia, jealousy, unhinged behaviour, anger issues, gaslighting etc etc that would be great.

I don't mind so much financial stability as long as it's not expected that I'll pay for everything."

As always gorgeous Meli has said it for me!

Yep I agree. I think I'm a fairly compassionate person. But getting caught up in someone else's drama/jealousy/paranoia is just plain scary! And the longer I'm actively having meets, the narrower my boundaries are for putting up with anything that even wiffs of red flag now!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bios tell me what They want me to know. I have no control over it and I guess that's where the risk factor comes into play, all I can do is try to safe guard myself x

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hahaha what a question!

I must say I’ve assumed most on here are mentally stable and then seen comments on threads that made me think otherwise… financially, economically, house stability doesn’t matter on here. Mental stability tho? That matters…

^ This. If someone could fill in a ticksheet and say if they display signs of paranoia, jealousy, unhinged behaviour, anger issues, gaslighting etc etc that would be great.

I don't mind so much financial stability as long as it's not expected that I'll pay for everything.

As always gorgeous Meli has said it for me!

Yep I agree. I think I'm a fairly compassionate person. But getting caught up in someone else's drama/jealousy/paranoia is just plain scary! And the longer I'm actively having meets, the narrower my boundaries are for putting up with anything that even wiffs of red flag now! "

Makes sense

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By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford


"Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh "

Not sure what you mean, or why it would matter, really. I imagine most folk are a little unstable in some aspects of their lives. I'm happy to go with the face they offer me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sway your decision to message someone or arrange a meet if the person of interest was stable in life?

By stable I mean mentally, financially and socially

But how indeed would you know Can’t tell from a bio and some pics lol bit deep for a Friday morning eh

Not sure what you mean, or why it would matter, really. I imagine most folk are a little unstable in some aspects of their lives. I'm happy to go with the face they offer me. "

It doesn’t matter I just wanted to ascertain the forums responses so you do you

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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich

In terms of a fwb, I most definitely prefer them to have some emotional and financial stability.

In terms of a one nighter, I am just looking for sex

They all start out as one- nighters. Reading their energy during sex mostly causes them to remain just a one-nighter

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