FabSwingers.com forum: Being a non drinker

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was reading an article in the metro today about a young lady who gave up drinking at 22. Before she finally did she said that she was worried about losing friends if she did not drink.

I get this totally and think part of my lack of social life, especially when growing up was because I did not drink. It was not something I ever enjoyed yet most of my peers were going out getting smashed at the weekend. I just saw it as a waste of money.

Later in my working life I know I was not invited on work dos because I did not drink. They thought I was looking down on them or would remember everything stupid they said or did. Of course it would have been completely different if I could have driven.

I tried drinking in occasions to fit in but it never really sat well with me and I didn't enjoy taste. I felt the pressure to try and fit in. Often felt that my lack of drinking affected my enjoyment as I did not fully understand the fun people got out of it or the lack of inhibitions it gave them.

When I was in university I had planned to get d*unk one night and end my life due to bad exam results. A friend talked me out of it.

As time went on I didn't want to drink as was afraid would tell a few people what I really thought of them or I would out myself as a kinkster. Being involved in the kink world helped as was never a good idea to mix drink and play.

Friends are used to me not drinking but I know many do a lot more sociable things with each other that I am not asked to because it involves drink. I will go to birthday drinks but not stay for long as watching others get d*unk has no enjoyment for me.

There are times I want to get pissed out of my head but that's usually when my demons are kicking in and I think I should experience it once before I give into my demons. I have bought alcohol before to get d*unk at home but never could go through with it.

Considering the amount of time I spend in spoons it's good for my bank balance and health that I don't drink.

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By *elloWoman
over a year ago

alpha centauri

One of my closest friends wont touch a drop, she gave up several years back. She won't even have one of those apparent alcohol free beers which have a small percentage, if it's not 100% zero she won't have it. When we go out she drives us and she joins in with every mad d*unkenness that we get up to that others don't believe she's totally sober, she is fun to be with without booze,

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By *thfloorCouple
over a year ago

Hove

That was quite the essay OP and a bit of a rollercoaster read. You've covered so many points and yeah the gist is, much of socialising is tied to alcohol consumption and it is very difficult to unpick. I'm pleased to see sobriety gaining popularity (we have sober raves here and an alcohol free bar too) but also see how tricky it is for business, it's such a big industry. I actually love alcohol as one of the legal highs but it is a drug after all and we don't always show it the respect it should command.

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By *cottish guy 555Man
over a year ago

London

Like you I have never dru nk alcohol and have never liked the taste. It never really had any impact on going out with friends or work colleagues or on socialising in general.

I wouldn't let it bother you too much. As has been mentioned there's a lot of people these days who don't. We just have to accept that we're really cheap dates.

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By *annGentMan
over a year ago

With a cracking view

Be yourself, don't be someone you think others will like.

I used to drink lager shandy's in my late teens, but as I had to drive to meet up with my mates, this was few and far between, and I ended up going off the taste of alcohol before I was 20.

Then in my late 20's and early 30's, my friends couldn't understand why I didn't drink, and felt the need to find me a drink so I could join in their fun. They couldn't get that every alcoholic drink has alcohol in it, and that was the bit I didn't like !

I enjoyed it as I could remind them about what they'd been like through their hangover the next day

I don't need anything extra to enjoy life, and sometimes feel sad for those that do, but that wears off very quickly !!! lol

What I don't get is those folk who go out with the intention to get d*unk !

If I'm out with friends, and it's good food, good conversation, the drinks flow and folk get tipsy, I've no problems with that.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

I am not much of a drinker.

I can never understand the British fascination with having to get absolutely smashed everytime we go out.

It's not an enjoyable sensation and who the hell can afford it these days anyway?

People who mix heavy drinking with playing scare me,if we attend a party and people are drinking heavily we make a quick exit.

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By *tylebender03Man
over a year ago

Manchester

I stopped drinking earlier this year. I still go out with friends I’ll drink or a few non alcoholic lagers. If someone buys me a drink I’ll just down it. It’s usually only once or twice on the night. I still enjoy going out and have fun. Also for once in my life I’m the responsible one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I done 7 months sober once due to illness will never do that again ever

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By *ealMissShadyWoman
over a year ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Good for you, Sobriety is a great feeling

I don't drink either. It was devastating seeing a close family member pass from pancreatic cancer which spread to other organs and cirrhosis caused by alcoholism and having lived with someone who is alcohol dependant it's not my idea of a great time.

I can have loads of fun on nights out, I love to dance and can walk away from the night sober able to drive myself home and keep the brilliant memories....I don't care if people think that's boring, give me boring anyday mif it means I get to keep my liver

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

It’s easier said than done OP. But I would say, don’t ever worry about what people think. Life is too short, and why do something you not comfortable with

And personally I do not drink. I get an allergic reaction and I go bright red from my face to my stomach and I don’t like the taste or the feeling. And it has never stopped me, and I always can have fun.

Well done to you op

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

My father was alcoholic's I don't drink hate the smell of it .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never drank and also never used to go on nights out with friends. I've been to the pub with them and enjoyed that but I think they assumed I wouldn't enjoy a night out in clubs and to be honest, part of me did think like that as well, especially as I thought I preferred to stay home and not be out too late.

But I decided to give it a go and absolutely loved just being out with my friends and they never pressured me to drink or took the piss out of me and I just enjoyed being part of the memories. I hope it becomes more accepted but I've never felt less for not drinking and I give huge credit to my mates for helping me feel that way

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I've never once tasted alcohol not even out of curiosity.

Every one of my friends were drinkers but I never felt the need to fit in despite one of them telling me once that I wasn't a real man unless I took a drink.

My reply was that it took a bigger man to make his own decisions and say no.

My lack of social life over the years had nothing to do with being teetotal and more to do with personal circumstances.

When I went out with work colleagues they wouldn't allow me to buy a round and always insisted that they should cover all my drinks as long as I looked after the kitty.

I've never seen the point of it to be honest and not drinking has never been an impediment.

I've grown up in a warzone and seen things that would drive people to drink but it's never been a conversation I've had with myself.

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By *myAndScottCouple
over a year ago

Tamworth

6 years alcohol free in November.

I think the point of living is to experience. Preferably positive experiences.

I didn't experience much positive when I drank.

If I could go back 6 years and explain to that me what I would go on and get up to in the next 6 years there is no way I would have believed it.

I like my life now. I didn't like it before.

Respect op. Do your thing man.

Scott.

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