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By *am93ton OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Been with my partner going on five years now, and to cut a long story short we have always had a good sex life. I wouldn't say my partner is inexperienced but easily satisfied for example she is just pleased without having the need of trying extra things. ( boring for me but I've always respected that). How ever I have recently discovered old messages on her Facebook from years ago with a profile which is now blank but messages so guessing its wither her ex or a friend. I haven't questioned her on them because I don't want her to know I've been scrolling through her past. But basically the messages contained details on their sex life as i read into them and she was extremely more intimate. For example wearing different things for him and sucking which she has never done for me as she said she wasn't into it yet she has done in the past.

Question is to women or men have yous done or experienced this and why do you think she may not be interested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not cool going through her past.

If you wanna know why she isn’t interested, grow a pair and ask her.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Never experienced it

I think you probably know that the only person who can answer your question is your partner.

Why did you feel the need to go through her past?

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands


"Not cool going through her past.

If you wanna know why she isn’t interested, grow a pair and ask her. "

What he said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing the guy is just trying to process what's he's found despite how he's found it and is asking because he's scared of what she might say, so maybe asking here gives him a bit of a warning to what it might be and help him try and understand it.

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By *am93ton OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Thanks for the honest answers. I didn't feel the need at first, We have always trusted each other with our accounts we frequently use each others phones especially for Facebook for family etc, it was just out of curiosity as some were blank and I came across it, I could and maybe should of stopped but with her being my partner I couldn't help myself. Not going to lie reading some of it turned me on but at the same time a bit confused as to why. Just wondering if any women out there would do some stuff with one guy and not another.

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

She liked sucking his dick just not yours which is very odd! However it's wrong going through someone's private conversations, Especially if you are supposed to trust them. Maybe be more vocal to her? It might spice up your sex life as it sounds like it needs it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve never done it……. The past stays in the past…. If it’s bothering you OP then talk to your partner…. Be open and honest

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands


"Thanks for the honest answers. I didn't feel the need at first, We have always trusted each other with our accounts we frequently use each others phones especially for Facebook for family etc, it was just out of curiosity as some were blank and I came across it, I could and maybe should of stopped but with her being my partner I couldn't help myself. Not going to lie reading some of it turned me on but at the same time a bit confused as to why. Just wondering if any women out there would do some stuff with one guy and not another. "

Only person that can answer this is your partner OP, try explaining it like you did here to her about why you read them, maybe leave out the turned on bit, but she really is the only person who can answer this for you.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Thanks for the honest answers. I didn't feel the need at first, We have always trusted each other with our accounts we frequently use each others phones especially for Facebook for family etc, it was just out of curiosity as some were blank and I came across it, I could and maybe should of stopped but with her being my partner I couldn't help myself. Not going to lie reading some of it turned me on but at the same time a bit confused as to why. Just wondering if any women out there would do some stuff with one guy and not another. "

We could tell you all sorts but it won't give you any real idea of what *she* is thinking and why she's different with you.

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

I think you should be less concerned about what was in her past and more concerned about your present with her. That’s the bit to talk about, it doesn’t matter about what went before.

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

Talking about it doesn't necessarily mean she did it.... the only true way to know is to ask, but then that opens up the why you were reading the messages question from her.

I guess just find a way of bringing the situation up without being obvious is the way to go, for example a discussion about likes and dislikes

Tinder

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By *ent in BlackMan
over a year ago

Silsden


"Been with my partner going on five years now, and to cut a long story short we have always had a good sex life. I wouldn't say my partner is inexperienced but easily satisfied for example she is just pleased without having the need of trying extra things. ( boring for me but I've always respected that). How ever I have recently discovered old messages on her Facebook from years ago with a profile which is now blank but messages so guessing its wither her ex or a friend. I haven't questioned her on them because I don't want her to know I've been scrolling through her past. But basically the messages contained details on their sex life as i read into them and she was extremely more intimate. For example wearing different things for him and sucking which she has never done for me as she said she wasn't into it yet she has done in the past.

Question is to women or men have yous done or experienced this and why do you think she may not be interested.

"

Does she know you’re on fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Been with my partner going on five years now, and to cut a long story short we have always had a good sex life. I wouldn't say my partner is inexperienced but easily satisfied for example she is just pleased without having the need of trying extra things. ( boring for me but I've always respected that). How ever I have recently discovered old messages on her Facebook from years ago with a profile which is now blank but messages so guessing its wither her ex or a friend. I haven't questioned her on them because I don't want her to know I've been scrolling through her past. But basically the messages contained details on their sex life as i read into them and she was extremely more intimate. For example wearing different things for him and sucking which she has never done for me as she said she wasn't into it yet she has done in the past.

Question is to women or men have yous done or experienced this and why do you think she may not be interested.

"

Is she interested in you organising meets for her with men she doesn't know? Does she trust you? I know I wouldn't be having fun fucking someone I didn't trust. Snooping through my phone and private messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not cool going through her past.

If you wanna know why she isn’t interested, grow a pair and ask her.

What he said."

Plus you cannot ask her but put this out in a forum.. Where everyone will see. I am sure she does not appreciate you sharing her past here either op.

Talk to her yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for the honest answers. I didn't feel the need at first, We have always trusted each other with our accounts we frequently use each others phones especially for Facebook for family etc, it was just out of curiosity as some were blank and I came across it, I could and maybe should of stopped but with her being my partner I couldn't help myself. Not going to lie reading some of it turned me on but at the same time a bit confused as to why. Just wondering if any women out there would do some stuff with one guy and not another. "

No. I would not. In your profile says she does not want to be here because of privacy. Is this not invading her privacy op?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Been with my partner going on five years now, and to cut a long story short we have always had a good sex life. I wouldn't say my partner is inexperienced but easily satisfied for example she is just pleased without having the need of trying extra things. ( boring for me but I've always respected that). How ever I have recently discovered old messages on her Facebook from years ago with a profile which is now blank but messages so guessing its wither her ex or a friend. I haven't questioned her on them because I don't want her to know I've been scrolling through her past. But basically the messages contained details on their sex life as i read into them and she was extremely more intimate. For example wearing different things for him and sucking which she has never done for me as she said she wasn't into it yet she has done in the past.

Question is to women or men have yous done or experienced this and why do you think she may not be interested.

"

Firstly, when it comes to oral sex - if a woman avoids that could it be a hygiene issue?

Secondly, perhaps she doesn’t feel very sexy with you - with him she might have made more of an effort because she was younger and felt prettier / slimmer, he complemented her more, or life was just less of a chore. From what I can tell a lot of women’s sex drives get affected negatively because life is so full on - it’s easier just doing wham, bam, no frills sex then dressing sexy and playing for hours when you are tired and stressed. It’s also hard to make an effort for a partner in bed if you feel resentful because they don’t make an effort for you - including helping with chores!

But whatever the reason is - these messages are years old, does it matter what she did with him? Rather focus on what’s going on between you 2 now.

And for heavens sake don’t snoop on your partner and read private things!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Been with my partner going on five years now, and to cut a long story short we have always had a good sex life. I wouldn't say my partner is inexperienced but easily satisfied for example she is just pleased without having the need of trying extra things. ( boring for me but I've always respected that). How ever I have recently discovered old messages on her Facebook from years ago with a profile which is now blank but messages so guessing its wither her ex or a friend. I haven't questioned her on them because I don't want her to know I've been scrolling through her past. But basically the messages contained details on their sex life as i read into them and she was extremely more intimate. For example wearing different things for him and sucking which she has never done for me as she said she wasn't into it yet she has done in the past.

Question is to women or men have yous done or experienced this and why do you think she may not be interested.

"

Plus you are looking for a lad to take things further with her after a social but you said she does not want to be here.

Do you think she messaged someone on social media to take things further as you say, looking for a lad to take things further after a social op?

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By *andycandy88Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

One thing I learnt from early teens don't go searching because you won't like what you will find.

Trust is hard to give and easy to break so give trust to be trusted back.

Communicate to understand not just to respond which a lot of people can get wrong.

Most people listen to respond back instead of listening to understand

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By *orthernJayMan
over a year ago

LHR

Hmm, my sex life is crap! I know, lets snoop around my partners messages and see if I can find the reason why!

If you’re mature enough to have sex and be in a relationship then ‘reciprocity’ is the only answer you seek!

Instead of wasting your time on here, procrastinating why your partner did or didn’t; put all of your efforts into her and your relationship!

Listen to every word she says, look at her, genuinely “look”, don’t look past her, see her for what she is instead of pondering on what she isn’t!

I’m telling you, if women could procreate without us men, we’d be fucking consigned to history!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chances are she did things to please him that perhaps she wasn’t really that into herself and now she’s older she has more confidence to say no. I had a more colourful sex life in my past but I did a lot just to please my partners or was a case of experimenting and now I’ve been there don’t that bit interested in doing it again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Chances are she did things to please him that perhaps she wasn’t really that into herself and now she’s older she has more confidence to say no. I had a more colourful sex life in my past but I did a lot just to please my partners or was a case of experimenting and now I’ve been there don’t that bit interested in doing it again. "

*not interested in doing it again.

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By *orthernJayMan
over a year ago

LHR


"She liked sucking his dick just not yours which is very odd! However it's wrong going through someone's private conversations, Especially if you are supposed to trust them. Maybe be more vocal to her? It might spice up your sex life as it sounds like it needs it. "

Why is it “very odd”

There’s 101 reasons why she’s no interest in oral with OP vis-a-vis anyone in her past!

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"She liked sucking his dick just not yours which is very odd! However it's wrong going through someone's private conversations, Especially if you are supposed to trust them. Maybe be more vocal to her? It might spice up your sex life as it sounds like it needs it.

Why is it “very odd”

There’s 101 reasons why she’s no interest in oral with OP vis-a-vis anyone in her past! "
? Odd that she doesn't wanna with her partner.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I've enjoyed different things with different partners, not all are the same for example I absolutely love sucking the Mr so much so I border on cock worship, in the past cox sucking has been very meh.... Take it or leave it, it's partly down to his reactions his legs shaking the moaning etc.

Other people I've done the sex as quick as possible to get it over with others I haven't.

Sex for me definitely varies person to person, I don't think that's unusual well not in my case anyway.

I've tried things in the past I wouldn't again because I tried and disliked them it doesn't mean because I don't want to again I think any less of the Mr it's because I want to enjoy our sex and I know I've been there, done it and disliked it.

Maybe speak to her if it's bothering you I know that means admitting to snooping but you may get the answers your looking for.

Mrs

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Bloody typos CBA to fix, apologies

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By *ark_SalfordMan
over a year ago

salford

My wife chwated on me, i found out by looking at mesages as well, one ofvthe things ipset me was like the op the messages cleary showed that she did things for them that didnt with me, like sucking and swallowing, i confrionted her with the messages, and asked why cheated and why did these things with him

She said it made her feel naughty doing that with other guys, like she was a different person acting a fantasy

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