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 If you’ve been a shit shag and had a complaint we’d love to hear about it.
Please discuss
Love and Peace  | |||
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"There must have been times I’ve been a crap shag. The poor women who experienced that have been far too nice to complain though." We’ve heard about your shit shagging  | |||
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"I’ve had a complaint before. It had to end.  "You can’t stop there, we ALL want the deets | |||
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"People complain about me all the time but fab are yet to ban me " It will come dude  | |||
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"Actually thinking about it he's had a few complaints - I'm a shit shag, avoid at all costs. Mrs " Too late | |||
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"I've had a complaint once, he told me during his debrief on what went well and what I could improve. And no I'm not joking." And……………………  | |||
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I quickly asked him to leave | |||
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"Dunno if it was as much a complaint as feedback, that it didn’t feel like the way his girlfriend did it.
I quickly asked him to leave"Holy shit | |||
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"I've had a complaint once, he told me during his debrief on what went well and what I could improve. And no I'm not joking." he's now your husband?  | |||
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"Wife did ask a guy to leave. He made zero effort, zero foreplay and just wanted to stick his big dick in dry. She stopped it there. Being asked to leave is probably the ultimate complaint but it’s only happened once so very unusual. " Waddling out the room like a penguin is never good  | |||
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"Dunno if it was as much a complaint as feedback, that it didn’t feel like the way his girlfriend did it.
I quickly asked him to leave"Good complaint | |||
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"I just provide the folloiwing caveat these days in advance of anything happening; "I identify as Microwave Dinner. I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my picture and I am just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you're desparate."" My knickers would be on the floor reading this | |||
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"Men never have shit shags. Over to you ladies!" Exactly this ^^ | |||
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"Wife did ask a guy to leave. He made zero effort, zero foreplay and just wanted to stick his big dick in dry. She stopped it there. Being asked to leave is probably the ultimate complaint but it’s only happened once so very unusual. " Try to explain why they would not go down a waterslide when it is not wet... they may understand. | |||
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"Unless it's so bad you never want any interaction with the person again who would say anything? My only yardstick is they always come back for more. But I'm sure sometimes I'm off my game and it wasn't that great. " I’m talking bad bad, the type of sex that’s so bad that you don’t sleep at night thinking about it | |||
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But I've had people say best sex of their life. So I stick with them | |||
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"Wife did ask a guy to leave. He made zero effort, zero foreplay and just wanted to stick his big dick in dry. She stopped it there. Being asked to leave is probably the ultimate complaint but it’s only happened once so very unusual. Try to explain why they would not go down a waterslide when it is not wet... they may understand." We, perhaps wrongly, assume that an experienced guy can use his wits, mouth or fingers to work out if a woman is ready for penetration but again Fab meets surprise you. Some women would just put up with a bad experience on the night but if someone is just so inept and ultimately lazy then why should you ? | |||
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"It wasn't a verbal complaint but a guy did fall asleep mid blow job once. " Actually, this rings a bell. Going waaay back to my art school days there was one time a girl fell asleep while giving me a handjob. In her defence it had been a big day, we had drünk a LOT and it was very, very late. | |||
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"It wasn't a verbal complaint but a guy did fall asleep mid blow job once. Actually, this rings a bell. Going waaay back to my art school days there was one time a girl fell asleep while giving me a handjob. In her defence it had been a big day, we had drünk a LOT and it was very, very late." I have no defence . We were sober, the three of us seemed to be having a good time when from above I heard the sound of gentle snoring. Mr and I looked at each other, I gently extricated myself from the rapidly deflating penis and we laid there silently giggling until the gentleman awoke, seemingly refreshed. I just didn't have the heart to continue after such a rave review though and we went home never to return | |||
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"Actually thinking about it he's had a few complaints - I'm a shit shag, avoid at all costs. Mrs " Could I be the judge of that? Lol | |||
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"My ex once told me not to use my hands when giving him a blow job…. which was ironic as he ended up using his own hand to finish himself off "Really?!! I love that. Don’t listen to him, that’s perfect technique | |||
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"I have ! I got called lazy in the middle of sex , I mean he wasn't wrong
But I've had people say best sex of their life. So I stick with them "Was you not in ‘the zone’? | |||
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"I just bet you would " | |||
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"It wasn't a verbal complaint but a guy did fall asleep mid blow job once. " You need to be more ‘enthusiastic’ next time | |||
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"We met a guy in a club after months of messaging, he came after around 15 seconds of foreplay - loudly proclaimed “well that was shit” & then disappeared. He was gone, profile was gone, blocked on telegram. We knew it meant himself (hopefully) "Ideal meet! | |||
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"I've had a complaint once, he told me during his debrief on what went well and what I could improve. And no I'm not joking." I hope you ripped off his dick and slapped him with it lol | |||
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"I've told people I don't wish to repeat the experience. " Very harsh feedback | |||
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"I have had good ones, excellent ones and ones that lay there like a bag of spuds. It not like any one post yelp reviews. " But you’ve had no complaints yourself?  | |||
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"My ex once told me not to use my hands when giving him a blow job…. which was ironic as he ended up using his own hand to finish himself off "It’s cause you weren’t doing it proper | |||
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"Getting literally kicked out of bed on to the floor one time. I think that has to be a form of complaint. Still not sure what I did wrong because its hard to focus with concussion and a bruised penis.
"Did you have a happy ending though? | |||
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"It was one of the most boring experiences of my life, I got so frustrated that I told him mid thrust and he agreed. We laughed it off and had cheese toasties instead Em x" This was your Mr wasn’t it? | |||
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"I’ve had a guy stop mid shag to go to the bathroom to get a towel to dry his cock. Apparently I was too wet. "Dripping like a St Bernard’s chin | |||
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"Hard to complain when you’re crying "In a cold shower | |||
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"I’ve had a complaint before. It had to end. "Wouldn't be a complaint I had with you | |||
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"We met a guy in a club after months of messaging, he came after around 15 seconds of foreplay - loudly proclaimed “well that was shit” & then disappeared. He was gone, profile was gone, blocked on telegram. We knew it meant himself (hopefully) "The best one yet | |||
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"When my hubby was a young pup he managed to dislocate his two middle fingers whilst fingering one of his mates aunties. It's actually quite a funny story. He was certainly complaining at the time and he said she was not best pleased haha, Mrs x" How long did it take to remove his hand from her bonus hole?  | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint" ^^ take note girls | |||
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"Heard a few sheep bleet in my time, if that's in complaint fook knows " Their back legs stuck in your wellies? | |||
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"Heard a few sheep bleet in my time, if that's in complaint fook knows Their back legs stuck in your wellies? " Velcro attached to my legs as well Rex, I aint no amateur | |||
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"I've had a few complaints actually. I'd like to say the problem was them not me but actually... " Just not into it? | |||
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"Heard a few sheep bleet in my time, if that's in complaint fook knows Their back legs stuck in your wellies? Velcro attached to my legs as well Rex, I aint no amateur " Is right | |||
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"I've had a few, last too long, cocks a bit fat and I'm sore, I'm dissapointed you don't live closer, it hurts when I sit since we had sex. There's more but I'll stop there or I'll never get a meet ever again "More, more | |||
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"I just provide the folloiwing caveat these days in advance of anything happening; "I identify as Microwave Dinner. I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my picture and I am just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you're desparate."" In that case I'm a Rustler Burger. The last thing you'd choose, go ding after 90 seconds and leave you filled with regret afterwards. | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls "I blame the drink | |||
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"Only complaint I’ve had was the fact there’s only one of me "Where's the pinocchio emoji?... | |||
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"Only complaint I’ve had was the fact there’s only one of me "I’d get a crossed eyed lady next time | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls
I blame the drink "How many pints in? | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls
I blame the drink
How many pints in? "Enough for her to take me home with her | |||
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"I had one complaint. Solely because I asked her to actually put some effort in. Not just be a sack of spuds " ^^ advice right here ladies | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls
I blame the drink
How many pints in?
Enough for her to take me home with her "I was talking about you not her | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls
I blame the drink
How many pints in?
Enough for her to take me home with her
I was talking about you not her "Not enough to forget it | |||
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"I've had a girl fall asleep during oral. I guess that's as good as any complaint ^^ take note girls
I blame the drink
How many pints in?
Enough for her to take me home with her
I was talking about you not her
Not enough to forget it "There’s a hint of a complaint in there | |||
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"No way I would complain but I have a ‘Top Gear’ style leaderboard at the side of my bed and I invite the lady to guess where she is on the leaderboard of Top Shags…. They always get it wrong… we have a laugh when they find out they’re pretty average…. Well one of us does anyway!! "I take it the bag of spuds is at the bottom | |||
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"I’ve had a complaint before. It had to end. "I certainly get that- WOW | |||
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"It was one of the most boring experiences of my life, I got so frustrated that I told him mid thrust and he agreed. We laughed it off and had cheese toasties instead Em x This was your Mr wasn’t it? "It actually wasn't you know
It was before I met him | |||
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"No way I would complain but I have a ‘Top Gear’ style leaderboard at the side of my bed and I invite the lady to guess where she is on the leaderboard of Top Shags…. They always get it wrong… we have a laugh when they find out they’re pretty average…. Well one of us does anyway!!
I take it the bag of spuds is at the bottom "that actually made it 4th from bottom… im not naming any names who did worse | |||
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"I've had the odd d*unken two pumps & a squirt and admit I was shit but certainly made up for the disappointment the morning after "That’s what you think | |||
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"It was one of the most boring experiences of my life, I got so frustrated that I told him mid thrust and he agreed. We laughed it off and had cheese toasties instead Em x This was your Mr wasn’t it?
It actually wasn't you know
It was before I met him "I’m a shit shag as well you know if you’re offering cheese toasties | |||
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"My ex was called Karen. I’ve had loads of complaints." I know Karen | |||
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"No way I would complain but I have a ‘Top Gear’ style leaderboard at the side of my bed and I invite the lady to guess where she is on the leaderboard of Top Shags…. They always get it wrong… we have a laugh when they find out they’re pretty average…. Well one of us does anyway!!
I take it the bag of spuds is at the bottom that actually made it 4th from bottom… im not naming any names who did worse "No don’t | |||
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"My ex was called Karen. I’ve had loads of complaints. I know Karen "You banged her too? | |||
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"My chat up line to Penny was 'Ever had a shit shag? No? Want one?'" Till death do us part | |||
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"My ex was called Karen. I’ve had loads of complaints. I know Karen
You banged her too? "I got the shit veri from Karen. Wait. All my veri’s don’t paint a good picture of me | |||
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"I've had the odd d*unken two pumps & a squirt and admit I was shit but certainly made up for the disappointment the morning after
That’s what you think "
Well she didn't complain again & came back for lots more | |||
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"My chat up line to Penny was 'Ever had a shit shag? No? Want one?'" Brilliant!! | |||
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"I've had the odd d*unken two pumps & a squirt and admit I was shit but certainly made up for the disappointment the morning after
That’s what you think
Well she didn't complain again & came back for lots more "So you’ve had no complaints then? | |||
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"Nope never. Compliments always. Cum back for more " You’ve never gave a shit blow-job? | |||
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"I had one complaint. When I didn’t catch the cum with my mouth. I’ve never got over being disappointed with myself for this "That's a really poor show LB.
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"I had one complaint. When I didn’t catch the cum with my mouth. I’ve never got over being disappointed with myself for this
That's a really poor show LB.
"I know darling. I can’t get over it | |||
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But seriously - for me it takes 2 people. We feed off each other, respond to each other. If I’ve been shit, so have they & vice versa.
But no-one has ever actually complained. Yet. | |||
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J | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. " Has that been your feedback? | |||
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"I had one complaint. When I didn’t catch the cum with my mouth. I’ve never got over being disappointed with myself for this "And you’ve never missed a drop since  | |||
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"I once was such a crap lay for a guy that the arsehole loomed over me shouting at me while I sat in my bra and stockings in the middle of the bed. It was sudden, unexpected, and very unpleasant. I left. Quickly. "Was it not roll play? | |||
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"I don’t stick around long enough for a review
But seriously - for me it takes 2 people. We feed off each other, respond to each other. If I’ve been shit, so have they & vice versa.
But no-one has ever actually complained. Yet."Me neither, the only complaint I can see me getting is ‘the twat wiped his knob on my curtains when he left’ | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback? "Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me | |||
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"They didn't complain but did go UNLOS by morning.
J"There’s no greater compliment on here | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me "I suppose someone has to | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me
I suppose someone has to "Not really. I could become a nun | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me
I suppose someone has to
Not really. I could become a nun "Yes Sister KC | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me
I suppose someone has to
Not really. I could become a nun
Yes Sister KC "Careful calling me that, I might get a stiffy | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me
I suppose someone has to
Not really. I could become a nun
Yes Sister KC
Careful calling me that, I might get a stiffy "Do you have some love rosery bead eggs? | |||
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"I had one complaint. When I didn’t catch the cum with my mouth. I’ve never got over being disappointed with myself for this
And you’ve never missed a drop since "Absofuckinglutely | |||
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"I'm wheely, wheely shite. 1/10 would not recommend. Has that been your feedback?
Yup. Best avoided, really. Mr KC just does me out of a sense of obligation and because he feels sorry for me
I suppose someone has to
Not really. I could become a nun
Yes Sister KC
Careful calling me that, I might get a stiffy
Do you have some love rosery bead eggs? "Yes and I say my hail Marys religiously ever night | |||
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