FabSwingers.com forum: What do you think?

By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

As it's probably happened to a few maybe many men and women including myself.

It brings me to ask forumites, what do you think happens to people that stand people up?

You get dressed up, make your way to meet a person that then just end up not answering calls and don't show up at arranged locations

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

Please keep replies in here

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By *ertie basset all sortsMan
over a year ago

Portsmouth

I hate this it let's genuine people down then you may have missed someone else to meet,, why can't people just say that they just want to chat, at least you know where you are etc xx sorry to hear this x s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure it must feel awful been stood up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get dissapointed and become more guarded for the next time

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

"I hate this it let's genuine people down then you may have missed someone else to meet,, why can't people just say that they just want to chat, at least you know where you are etc xx sorry to hear this x s"

Absolutely, the shitty people ruin it and make it harder for the genuine people

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

"I get dissapointed and become more guarded for the next time"

What do you think happens to people that do it?

I'm a strong believer in karma

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get dissapointed and become more guarded for the next time

What do you think happens to people that do it?

I'm a strong believer in karma"

Hopefully they get similar back and then see how it feels

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People still need to remember that their beautiful. I hate hearing people put themselves down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got stood up for the first time this year, on the train wondering why I’m suddenly blocked on everything and calls aren’t going through, feels absolutely awful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I imagine the people that do the standing up laugh, think it's OK as they may see it as not a big deal and possibly get off on it, especially if the person that's been stood up has made it known they are excited and got dressed up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I imagine the people that do the standing up laugh, think it's OK as they may see it as not a big deal and possibly get off on it, especially if the person that's been stood up has made it known they are excited and got dressed up "

Cruel people

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By *ertie basset all sortsMan
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Absolutely, the shitty people ruin it and make it harder for the genuine people

Especially when it is a woman who is let down as there are safety concerns etc.. You then have to build up your trust again x

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By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

Omg that’s the worst feeling.

Along with finding out about being a plan B.

I have no answer to your question OP but hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This must be why it's so hard to chat with women online.

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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London | Belfast

What happens to them? nothing. They just write the next guy as you're still tapping your fingers waiting around for them.

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By *ohntall123Man
over a year ago

Biggleswade

"As it's probably happened to a few maybe many men and women including myself.

It brings me to ask forumites, what do you think happens to people that stand people up?

You get dressed up, make your way to meet a person that then just end up not answering calls and don't show up at arranged locations

It’s cruel, just be honest . What’s the point in leading someone on .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they are about to leave and then they drop their phone and keys down a drain and need to try and recover it all but can’t communicate that with the person they’re meeting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hugs sorry this happened can be frustrating

Speaking for myself personally in the past when it’s happened

I have just flown the meet now flag and took the first or a if multiple come in at the one time best off the bunch so to speak

To not waste all the time and length that I put in to a meet

Has lead me to take meets wouldn’t normally have

Usually fallowed by that didn’t happen just forget wtf was I thinking

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I just assume that they had no intention of ever meeting me

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By *ohntall123Man
over a year ago

Biggleswade

"I just assume that they had no intention of ever meeting me "

I’m sorry to hear that , they missed out then . It’s not on you it’s on them

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By *ames250122Man
over a year ago

Worcester

"As it's probably happened to a few maybe many men and women including myself.

It brings me to ask forumites, what do you think happens to people that stand people up?

You get dressed up, make your way to meet a person that then just end up not answering calls and don't show up at arranged locations

I’ve had some truly awful experiences with time wasters and no shows. The one that sticks with me the most was traveling some distance to meet with a couple at night after chatting with them for a few days and a lot during the day of meeting. Very keen to meet me so agreed to drive to meet them at theirs. Single guy, on my own in a strange place , meeting a couple I’ve not meet in person before ( not sensible looking back). Gave me a street near them so we could meet there but never showed. More than anything, not time or money wasted bothered me but tbh its the fact that it’s just as intimidating meeting a couple on your own if not more as it is for them until you’ve meet and not such an easy thing to do as people make out on here. I know as single blokes we’re not meant have those kind of feelings cos single blokes can’t be vulnerable. However that lack of simple consideration of what it took for me to show up and not even have the kindness to message or call to cancel and not just ghost me has had a very negative impact on my experience here.

As for what happens to them, nothing I imagine they carry on remorseless and do it to other people until they get board and leave fab or actually meet with someone they are actually serious about meeting and not instigate and string people along to meet with them when they’re commitment to meet is flaky at best. I’d rather they just tell, either by message, phone or in person when I arrived that they wish to bail. At least they’ve shown some small consideration.

Any boo, sorry for the rant and long post. Fingers crossed fab gets better lol x

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By *host1100Man
over a year ago

Near Falkirk

I think KARMA is about it !! You can announce it on Forum and an Update but I don’t think it would help x

Why bother organising if you’re not gonna go, that would piss me off, it does actually because you’re right, it’s then harder for us genuine guys x

Rob x

ps can you report to admin ?

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By *estSussexGuy76Man
over a year ago

copthorne

Luckily I have never been stood up but I did have a date where she was over a hour late.

Only reason I stayed was the footy was on but the date was crap as I thought it was rude.

Explanation for being late was she wasn't sure what to wear and train times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most the time men bottle it, going from talking to in person is a big jump and some people prefer a screen. Or they had no intention of meeting at all.

Whatever the reason, you don't need to know. Just block, move on and give no second chance.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Nothing I don't think ,

That's probably why there's profiles that do it several times.

Some people get nervous and bottle it,but there are others who get off on leading people on,who never intended to meet.

Sadly I don't believe in karma ,I've seen too many unsavoury people who never seem to get their cumuppence .

Miss

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Not bothered, the evening becomes my own. Their loss.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This makes my piss boil!

Pardon my French!

Happened to me twice.

My downtime is precious to me so if I make the effort etc etc.

As for what happens to them….may their private part be infected by the flees of a thousand camels!

Now one does not rush in

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"...

It brings me to ask forumites, what do you think happens to people that stand people up?

...

What do I think happened to them?

Simple: They stayed at home doing what their other half had unexpectedly asked them to do.

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Just move on and put it down to experiance x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What happens to them?

Nothing, they’re free to go and do it to the next person.

What can realistically be done to stop out? Pretty much nothing.

People have been standing others up since the dawn of time. This internet has just made it easier for them to do it, and for those stood up……having a platform let others know.

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By *archelCouple
over a year ago

A field somewhere

Had a ghosting a very short while ago, it turned the night to crap for me (mr). Which in turn turned it in to a crap night for Mrs _archel.

Definitely won't be making the same mistake again.

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Remember one he kept it up to the last minute! I was at the agreed place! I messaged he had just left his place 5 mins away 10 mins go past I txt again he is just parking up! 10 more mins and his walking up to place! 10 more mins as the car park he was parking was maybe 3mins away! Suddenly dawned on me I've been played! Sent a message saying ha ha! Then blocked him! What he got from that I have no idea! We had been talking weeks as well! X

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

They have turned in to mobile phone zombies !! (See my other post)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They have turned in to mobile phone zombies !! (See my other post)

The mystery is clearing

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

"Maybe they are about to leave and then they drop their phone and keys down a drain and need to try and recover it all but can’t communicate that with the person they’re meeting? "

Erm no I saw him show up on whats app and not open my message to him when I arrived at agreed location phone calls were unanswered too

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

Thank you everyone

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By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago

Fairytale Wood

"I think most the time men bottle it, going from talking to in person is a big jump and some people prefer a screen. Or they had no intention of meeting at all.

Whatever the reason, you don't need to know. Just block, move on and give no second chance."

I agree with this to some extent, re other threads especially guys feel the need to compete, any say otherwise.

They big themselves up and all the bravado to such extent because the feel they have to. They finally get the illusive meet, feeling excited soon makes way for insecurities, trepidation real worry about actually how they will be compared to other meets. ladies we don't always help with that. So they get cold feet. Doesn't help when its raised in the forums also.

So not all non shows have nefarious reasons for not showing, could be as simple as lack of confidence, lets be honest guys are made to feel they have a lot to live upto. Not condoning it but i understand it.

Dont forget women can be just as bad especially for 1 2 1.

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By *lueDressWoman
over a year ago

Bath

Ive turned up but wished I hadn't..

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's going to depend on the reason they stood you up. Some may not be the people they claim to be, so couldn't attend, unless to view you.

Others may get caught out by a partner and may be in trouble and near impossible to make contact, due to their crime.

Others, may have a genuine emergency, life or death.

Some of these will feel ashamed I'm guessing. Others may also move to a different meet and not care.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"I think KARMA is about it !! You can announce it on Forum and an Update but I don’t think it would help x

Why bother organising if you’re not gonna go, that would piss me off, it does actually because you’re right, it’s then harder for us genuine guys x

Rob x

ps can you report to admin ?"

Yes, you can report no shows to Admin. It's partly helped if all confirmations are done in fab too.

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By *andycandy88 OP Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

"I think most the time men bottle it, going from talking to in person is a big jump and some people prefer a screen. Or they had no intention of meeting at all.

Whatever the reason, you don't need to know. Just block, move on and give no second chance.

I agree with this to some extent, re other threads especially guys feel the need to compete, any say otherwise.

Dont forget women can be just as bad especially for 1 2 1.

When an individual speaks to a person before they arrange to meet they have the time and chances to use their own initiative and know what kind of individual they are meeting.

Is the woman laid back down to earth or is she the type that's weighing him up?

To waste a person's time is the worst thing to do and there's no excuse for it.

We don't get time back

Money and material stuff are replaceable but our time isn't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fab gods makes them disappear and also deletes their profile shortly after

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By *ecky124TV/TS
over a year ago

Middlewich

So meany letdowns on here I just block them now not worth the time or the effort I use to get disappointed but now I expect it will be a no show so it doesn’t bother me anymore.

Sad really

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