FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

You aren't for us if you...

Jump to newest
 

By *winging Sally Sean OP   Couple
over a year ago

Warks / Northants Border

Whilst creating a new profile bio, I was mulling over how to explain the sort of people we are looking for. There was nothing I came up with, which was light-hearted enough. However, I think I came close with the below.

Forgetting the usual bland and boring elimination sentences we all read on profiles, does anyone else have a humorous 'You are not for me/us if you..." sentence?

Our is... You are not for us if you watch EastEnders and think "This is so realistic", this is just how my friends and family behave"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are not for me if you take relationship advice from Love Island.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was going to reference love island, but I was too slow!

You’re not for me if you’re likely to discuss the latest escapades of Meghan and Harry or any other such irrelevance.

*or vote Tory

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Whilst creating a new profile bio, I was mulling over how to explain the sort of people we are looking for. There was nothing I came up with, which was light-hearted enough. However, I think I came close with the below.

Forgetting the usual bland and boring elimination sentences we all read on profiles, does anyone else have a humorous 'You are not for me/us if you..." sentence?

Our is... You are not for us if you watch EastEnders and think "This is so realistic", this is just how my friends and family behave" "

very good actually and eastenders isn't a reflection of London or Londoners

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

You are not for me if your dick leaks cheese

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

You aren’t for me if your favourite dildo is fire extinguisher sized

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *leasureseekers123Couple
over a year ago

Hythe

You’re not for us if on your profile photos your house looks like you’re about to star in “hoarders” or “life of grime”

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *annybrowneyesMan
over a year ago

Paddock Wood

You aren't for me if you leave bread crumbs in the butter

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are not for me if you’re for the sake and the rest is not the best.

*I let my middle button decide.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

You are not for us if I can see your insides on your pics.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *winging Sally Sean OP   Couple
over a year ago

Warks / Northants Border

Some of these are brilliant!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You are not for me if you take relationship advice from Love Island."

But Maya Jama man. She could tell me to do anything and I’d do it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’re not for me if you liked Arya Killing the night king.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rumswingersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

You aren’t for us if you spell gorgeous “gawjus”.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You aren't for us if you don't have a south facing garden and don't enjoy fish finger sandwiches

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley


"You aren't for us if you don't have a south facing garden and don't enjoy fish finger sandwiches "

With tomato ketchup or tartar sauce?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"Whilst creating a new profile bio, I was mulling over how to explain the sort of people we are looking for. There was nothing I came up with, which was light-hearted enough. However, I think I came close with the below.

Forgetting the usual bland and boring elimination sentences we all read on profiles, does anyone else have a humorous 'You are not for me/us if you..." sentence?

Our is... You are not for us if you watch EastEnders and think "This is so realistic", this is just how my friends and family behave" "

But all people from East London behave like that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

You ain't fa me if ya don't eat pie mash n liquor for breakfast, smovvad in salt n vigenar

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *valanche1001Man
over a year ago

Leeds

You are not for me if perusing your gallery feels like flicking through Gynaecologist’s Weekly

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

You aren’t for me if you wear white socks with black shoes….

Or you think the idea of a nice meal out is at a Toby carvery.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

You're not for me if you have a long whiny profile and a foot fetish

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You aren't for us if you don't have a south facing garden and don't enjoy fish finger sandwiches

With tomato ketchup or tartar sauce?"

Jeez we are not that fussy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

You are not for us if the windows of your sitting room face full west.

B

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading


"Whilst creating a new profile bio, I was mulling over how to explain the sort of people we are looking for. There was nothing I came up with, which was light-hearted enough. However, I think I came close with the below.

Forgetting the usual bland and boring elimination sentences we all read on profiles, does anyone else have a humorous 'You are not for me/us if you..." sentence?

Our is... You are not for us if you watch EastEnders and think "This is so realistic", this is just how my friends and family behave" "

What about if you watch Downton Abbey?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth


"You’re not for us if on your profile photos your house looks like you’re about to star in “hoarders” or “life of grime”"

Omg... I saw the grimiest bathroom ever the other day

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

You are all for me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

You aren't for me if you keep your socks on

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *untogetherCouple
over a year ago

Malaga, Spain, Not in U. K.

You aren't for us... if your toenails look like you could swoop up a fish from a lake.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittleRed18Woman
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"You are not for me if perusing your gallery feels like flicking through Gynaecologist’s Weekly "

Agreed!

Or if your pics gallery has more flag poles than a UN building

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *winging Sally Sean OP   Couple
over a year ago

Warks / Northants Border

There's some interesting profiles commenting on this thread. It has certainly made me a chuckle reading them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’re not for me if you don’t treat retail/hospitality staff like actual human beings.

Been on too many dates where the person was rude to the waiter or bar staff.. no second date

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkedKuntsCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

You aren't for us if you like tighty whiteys

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I covered things pretty well in my profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

You are not for me if you dont like haribos

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lueDressWoman
over a year ago

Bath

You're not for Me if you don't like horror movies.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

You're not for me if you keep calling me 'hun'... I'm not German, okay!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

Your not for me if you won't lick my athletes foot....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Silver FuxMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

You’re not for me if this is your first rodeo

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *cnugatugMan
over a year ago

Chatham

You are not for me if you use the term bae

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top