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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions.  . | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."But it’s not right is it  Makes me quite a horrible person.
Not looking for sympathy just thinking out loud. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."Very much so. Certain situations can push us in different unexpected ways. Remember you need to look after yourself too. It's not selfish to also be doing that. | |||
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"Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."^ She’s right. Well put, Amber. | |||
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"As long as your husband is getting the attention and support he needs from you, nothing wrong with you enjoying some down time. It's only an issue if you've got your priorities wrong. " My focus & attention is solely on him. I’m not looking to meeting up with anyone for the foreseeable & I’ve expressly put that on my bio so I’m not misleading anybody. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing?" No he doesn’t. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. " If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread." Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself." I just think cheating on the one person that you’re supposed to love in his biggest moment of need is as low as you can go and that’s as polite as I can possibly be on this subject. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " You shouldn't feel down upon yourself or feel any type of way. Truthfully it's your escapism and distraction. Sometimes you need it to get away to help your state of mind especially when it's constantly worrying and over thinking it. At the end of the day you still care for him and support him. It just shows you have a good heart and intention. You could've been horrible and not care or even end leaving. But at the end of the day you are still there for him. Don't feel guilty and ashamed, or any kind of way. You being here and him not knowing maybe not the greatest but I'm sure you have your reasons. On which my guess you don't want to give him the stress | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread." Well said | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. You shouldn't feel down upon yourself or feel any type of way. Truthfully it's your escapism and distraction. Sometimes you need it to get away to help your state of mind especially when it's constantly worrying and over thinking it. At the end of the day you still care for him and support him. It just shows you have a good heart and intention. You could've been horrible and not care or even end leaving. But at the end of the day you are still there for him. Don't feel guilty and ashamed, or any kind of way. You being here and him not knowing maybe not the greatest but I'm sure you have your reasons. On which my guess you don't want to give him the stress" There’s no question of leaving him. Ever. I’m aware this thread stirs up strong opinions but I’m ok with that. I knew that when I posted. I’ve also admitted it’s wrong of me. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " Sorry to day this, but if your acknowledging how fucked up this is, it must mean you feel like your doing something wrong, so if you are acknowledging it as such, why are yiu doing it? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
But it’s not right is it Makes me quite a horrible person.
Not looking for sympathy just thinking out loud. "I read your profile. It sounds like he doesn't know and it sounds like you have been doing this for some time before he got sick. If you didn't feel horrible before then why now? But if you feel like a horrible person then examine what you are getting out of being here and see if you can find it else where in a way that won't make you or potentially your husband feel horrible. | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one." Why? | |||
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"You just do what you need to do. It’s nobody else’s business, although you’ve made it people’s business by posting it. Nobody knows what other people are going through. You’ll be judged on here of course you will. And for the record I think those who know me know I’d say exactly the same if it was a man who posted. Take care xx" Those in glass houses should sit down & shut up  I mean we all *think* we know what we’d do but until we’re in that position. I’m not saying it’s right,I know it’s not. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread." Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. | |||
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"You just do what you need to do. It’s nobody else’s business, although you’ve made it people’s business by posting it. Nobody knows what other people are going through. You’ll be judged on here of course you will. And for the record I think those who know me know I’d say exactly the same if it was a man who posted. Take care xx Those in glass houses should sit down & shut up I mean we all *think* we know what we’d do but until we’re in that position. I’m not saying it’s right,I know it’s not. "I’m a big believer, and always have been, that you cannot say exactly what you would do until you’re in a situation. | |||
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"It’s mad isn’t it how men get absolutely slated for being on here behind their wives’ backs, but women - even a woman with a husband who has a fucking BRAIN TUMOR - get nothing but cuddles and reassurances and platitudes for cheating on their partners, hahahah!!! Fucking hell, the sexist double standards are insane!! Hahah" It’s always been like that on here | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one." • How often do the ones posted by men in a similar vein get removed? Rarely. Putting aside the moral compass, because it's not my business, I sincerely wish the OP well. I would do the same if a man had posted this thread. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. " Imagine being the husband. Seriously ill and your wife is cheating. Then she’s posting it all for everyone online to give her a pat on the back and tell her she’s amazing. I’m sorry but my brain tumour would be the last of her worries if that was the case. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " Love you!?? | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one. Why?" Because the OP may get some flack and maybe rightly so but I think this is a demon that she has to deal with in her own mind and shouldn't of been posted. P.s my wife has a brain tumour so I have some experience. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself. I just think cheating on the one person that you’re supposed to love in his biggest moment of need is as low as you can go and that’s as polite as I can possibly be on this subject." I echo this it’s really wrong especially now. | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one. Why? Because the OP may get some flack and maybe rightly so but I think this is a demon that she has to deal with in her own mind and shouldn't of been posted. P.s my wife has a brain tumour so I have some experience." I 100% knew I would get a lot of unsavoury responses & I'm ok with that. People have their opinions & who am I to disagree with them. I hope your wife is ok  | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. You shouldn't feel down upon yourself or feel any type of way. Truthfully it's your escapism and distraction. Sometimes you need it to get away to help your state of mind especially when it's constantly worrying and over thinking it. At the end of the day you still care for him and support him. It just shows you have a good heart and intention. You could've been horrible and not care or even end leaving. But at the end of the day you are still there for him. Don't feel guilty and ashamed, or any kind of way. You being here and him not knowing maybe not the greatest but I'm sure you have your reasons. On which my guess you don't want to give him the stress There’s no question of leaving him. Ever. I’m aware this thread stirs up strong opinions but I’m ok with that. I knew that when I posted. I’ve also admitted it’s wrong of me. " Well then your heart is in the right place and your intention is there. Truthfully what other peoples opinions/views shouldn't matter at the end of the day.No one should judge you. At the end of the day no one knows how you feel, what you are going and the whole story behind it. Your happiness and well being matters too. As long you are there for him and you give it your all that's what matters  | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. Imagine being the husband. Seriously ill and your wife is cheating. Then she’s posting it all for everyone online to give her a pat on the back and tell her she’s amazing. I’m sorry but my brain tumour would be the last of her worries if that was the case." I agree it's not about the husband it's all about the partner and how they feel | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. You shouldn't feel down upon yourself or feel any type of way. Truthfully it's your escapism and distraction. Sometimes you need it to get away to help your state of mind especially when it's constantly worrying and over thinking it. At the end of the day you still care for him and support him. It just shows you have a good heart and intention. You could've been horrible and not care or even end leaving. But at the end of the day you are still there for him. Don't feel guilty and ashamed, or any kind of way. You being here and him not knowing maybe not the greatest but I'm sure you have your reasons. On which my guess you don't want to give him the stress There’s no question of leaving him. Ever. I’m aware this thread stirs up strong opinions but I’m ok with that. I knew that when I posted. I’ve also admitted it’s wrong of me. Well then your heart is in the right place and your intention is there. Truthfully what other peoples opinions/views shouldn't matter at the end of the day.No one should judge you. At the end of the day no one knows how you feel, what you are going and the whole story behind it. Your happiness and well being matters too. As long you are there for him and you give it your all that's what matters "Except she is asking for other people's opinions. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
But it’s not right is it Makes me quite a horrible person.
Not looking for sympathy just thinking out loud. "The fact you feel guilty about it shows you have some empathy and are NOT a bad person at heart. Keep your spirits up. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
But it’s not right is it Makes me quite a horrible person.
Not looking for sympathy just thinking out loud.
The fact you feel guilty about it shows you have some empathy and are NOT a bad person at heart.
Keep your spirits up."What sort of logic is that? If I feel bad for roundhouse kicking a toddler does that make it ok? | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. Imagine being the husband. Seriously ill and your wife is cheating. Then she’s posting it all for everyone online to give her a pat on the back and tell her she’s amazing. I’m sorry but my brain tumour would be the last of her worries if that was the case." Again, that's not the part I'm focusing on. I'm neither condoning nor condemning directly on her choice of distraction. My initial response was before the information of the husbands knowledge was revealed. The advice/experience I shared there still stands and holds up regardless of the distraction being if she were to self harm, or go on shopping sprees, or get absolutely wasted etc. Regardless of it being a man or woman. How said person chooses to distract themselves is an issue within an issue. There are 2 very seperate issues within the context of this situation. I addressed one of them. | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one. Why? Because the OP may get some flack and maybe rightly so but I think this is a demon that she has to deal with in her own mind and shouldn't of been posted. P.s my wife has a brain tumour so I have some experience. I 100% knew I would get a lot of unsavoury responses & I'm ok with that. People have their opinions & who am I to disagree with them. I hope your wife is ok "My wife is fine, it did nearly kill her but was operated on and most of it removed, she has made a full recover as it was years ago but has to have regular yearly check ups and the fear of it growing again is always there. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. You shouldn't feel down upon yourself or feel any type of way. Truthfully it's your escapism and distraction. Sometimes you need it to get away to help your state of mind especially when it's constantly worrying and over thinking it. At the end of the day you still care for him and support him. It just shows you have a good heart and intention. You could've been horrible and not care or even end leaving. But at the end of the day you are still there for him. Don't feel guilty and ashamed, or any kind of way. You being here and him not knowing maybe not the greatest but I'm sure you have your reasons. On which my guess you don't want to give him the stress There’s no question of leaving him. Ever. I’m aware this thread stirs up strong opinions but I’m ok with that. I knew that when I posted. I’ve also admitted it’s wrong of me. Well then your heart is in the right place and your intention is there. Truthfully what other peoples opinions/views shouldn't matter at the end of the day.No one should judge you. At the end of the day no one knows how you feel, what you are going and the whole story behind it. Your happiness and well being matters too. As long you are there for him and you give it your all that's what matters
Except she is asking for other people's opinions."I don't think she is. I think she just wants some clarity and composure. At the end of the day she's being open and honest with herself. It's not she's hiding it on here and lying on fab. She knows her right and wrongs, in which she admits. But I do believe she's fighting own demons at the moment | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
But it’s not right is it Makes me quite a horrible person.
Not looking for sympathy just thinking out loud.
The fact you feel guilty about it shows you have some empathy and are NOT a bad person at heart.
Keep your spirits up."How is it sitting on the fence, not uncomfortable | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. " But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. Imagine being the husband. Seriously ill and your wife is cheating. Then she’s posting it all for everyone online to give her a pat on the back and tell her she’s amazing. I’m sorry but my brain tumour would be the last of her worries if that was the case. Again, that's not the part I'm focusing on. I'm neither condoning nor condemning directly on her choice of distraction. My initial response was before the information of the husbands knowledge was revealed. The advice/experience I shared there still stands and holds up regardless of the distraction being if she were to self harm, or go on shopping sprees, or get absolutely wasted etc. Regardless of it being a man or woman. How said person chooses to distract themselves is an issue within an issue. There are 2 very seperate issues within the context of this situation. I addressed one of them." Are you dropping the anchor and trying to turn the supertanker there? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " It’s probably a escape from real life. Probably keeping you sane with all that’s going on in your life. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread." I do have to agree with this ,I've seen a man post that he was looking for fun because his wife was terminal and he didn't get much empathy or support on here. I appreciate you're in a really difficult situation ,but is this really the right place/thing to do. Miss | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Yes, that changes certain aspects. But within the context of having a distraction of her own in such times (as to what that distraction is, is not my point nor business) I stand behind that. I'd say the same to a single man too. I've seen what such a situation can do to those around the person with the medical condition, if they don't keep other things to focus on along side it. Imagine being the husband. Seriously ill and your wife is cheating. Then she’s posting it all for everyone online to give her a pat on the back and tell her she’s amazing. I’m sorry but my brain tumour would be the last of her worries if that was the case. Again, that's not the part I'm focusing on. I'm neither condoning nor condemning directly on her choice of distraction. My initial response was before the information of the husbands knowledge was revealed. The advice/experience I shared there still stands and holds up regardless of the distraction being if she were to self harm, or go on shopping sprees, or get absolutely wasted etc. Regardless of it being a man or woman. How said person chooses to distract themselves is an issue within an issue. There are 2 very seperate issues within the context of this situation. I addressed one of them." Sorry I know I replied to you but it was directed at all the support shown in the thread when it wouldn’t be the same for a single man. If a bloke cheated because his wife was on her period he’d get absolutely demolished never mind a brain tumour. | |||
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"If ever there was a thread which sums up Fab, it is this one. " Yup | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it?" Wait a week. Post the exact same thread from your account and you’ll know what judgement really is. | |||
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"Are you dropping the anchor and trying to turn the supertanker there?" No. If you look my initial post was before the reveal of the husbands knowledge. My reaponse is on point and in character with all other comments I've made in serious tones on such subjects over the years of using this forum. Unlike a lot of people I have the ability to compartmentalise during a discussion. I don't simply view in black and white. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it? Wait a week. Post the exact same thread from your account and you’ll know what judgement really is. "
I would really love one of the men to do that - ultimate popcorn | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread." Whilst, as a single guy here, I'm tempted to agree with this last point, I also understand that we all have to navigate our way through our own particular circumstances as best we can just the get through them. Sometimes we all make decisions that don't stand up to the scrutiny of others who aren't party to the feelings we have coursing within us - isolation, frustration, loneliness, desperation, a need for something simple, yearning for relief, etc - and maybe also our own scrutiny in time. Yes sure, that might mean our actions don't accord with how others might act in the context of their own lives, but none of us know the full stories of others. I don't think more recrimination will help anything here, especially since your current circumstances seem more than enough for reflection - and yes, I'd say that equally to a man who'd been as open and so clearly contrite. Others have made their valid points, so I'm not going to heap any more of that onto you. I'm just going to wish you a path to whatever is best in your and your husband's lives. I hope he's going to be okay. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it?" It's life we all judge, those that don't say they do, are full of shit..judgement is an ingrained instinctual human behaviour, designed for survival....we judge everything, even if its on a subconscious level where your not aware of it | |||
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"Sorry I know I replied to you but it was directed at all the support shown in the thread when it wouldn’t be the same for a single man. If a bloke cheated because his wife was on her period he’d get absolutely demolished never mind a brain tumour." Oh without a doubt there are those that do not shy away from their double standards and sugar coating of things for a female poster. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it?" White knight alert | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? " That’s a bit unfair. There’s all kinds of mental health stuff posted on these forums. With loads of support. People on here even support people who have done the most horrendous things sometimes (because aww it could be a mental health issue). So what about this lady? How do you know she isn’t suffering mental health issues because of all this? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " As long as you're not intending to do anything about meeting your ex fwb, this is my take. This is just a website with words and pictures on - no different to most websites. I can understand the stresses and strains you may have looking after an ill partner, but every once in a while you need to ground yourself and take your mind off bad things for your own sanity. It doesn't mean you care any less, and allowing yourself a brief moment of pleasure is not wrong. Just don't take it too far. Bess x | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? That’s a bit unfair. There’s all kinds of mental health stuff posted on these forums. With loads of support. People on here even support people who have done the most horrendous things sometimes (because aww it could be a mental health issue). So what about this lady? How do you know she isn’t suffering mental health issues because of all this?" Well said | |||
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"Sorry to hear that you’re going through a tough time and I sincerely hope your husband is as comfortable as possible. However, being on Fab behind your husbands back whilst he so unwell is a pretty vile thing to do and whilst it may give you a distraction in the short term, it is an incredibly disloyal thing to do. I also feel if the worst should happen in the future, it will cause you an enormous amount of guilt knowing what you’ve done. As you have already aknowledged that you know the situation is fucked up and you know people will disagree with you, the fact that you’re still posting about it here is just blatant attention seeking. I would suggest you do yourself a favour and ask a Mod to take this post down. " The men who agree with women in an attempt to get their end away will really be conflicted by this post. | |||
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"Sorry to hear that you’re going through a tough time and I sincerely hope your husband is as comfortable as possible. However, being on Fab behind your husbands back whilst he so unwell is a pretty vile thing to do and whilst it may give you a distraction in the short term, it is an incredibly disloyal thing to do. I also feel if the worst should happen in the future, it will cause you an enormous amount of guilt knowing what you’ve done. As you have already aknowledged that you know the situation is fucked up and you know people will disagree with you, the fact that you’re still posting about it here is just blatant attention seeking. I would suggest you do yourself a favour and ask a Mod to take this post down. " She has. Maybe people can lay off now until it’s gone. | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? That’s a bit unfair. There’s all kinds of mental health stuff posted on these forums. With loads of support. People on here even support people who have done the most horrendous things sometimes (because aww it could be a mental health issue). So what about this lady? How do you know she isn’t suffering mental health issues because of all this?" I’ve never seen, for example, a woman support a cheating man on this forum - regardless of the mitigating circumstances. | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP " | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP "She made it the business of others by posting on here. | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
"She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she. | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she. "Would you support a man who had posted the same thing? If the answer is “yes” then I can’t fault you. If “no” then I have no time for you. She didn’t ask for attacks but she opened herself up to that possibility | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she. "I knew by posting I wouldn’t have an easy time. I know that people are entitled to their own opinions on things. I’ve admitted it’s not my best moment,not denied it. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it? White knight alert " No, just someone who accepts that sometimes our behaviour falls below society’s expected standards. Mine has. Yours? | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
She didn’t ask for attacks but she opened herself up to that possibility "I knew that it would provoke very strong opinions. | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
I knew by posting I wouldn’t have an easy time. I know that people are entitled to their own opinions on things. I’ve admitted it’s not my best moment,not denied it. "I admire you for your honesty and wouldn’t dream of judging anyone in your position | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
Would you support a man who had posted the same thing?
If the answer is “yes” then I can’t fault you. If “no” then I have no time for you.
She didn’t ask for attacks but she opened herself up to that possibility "Male or female my reply would be the same. "Thinking out loud" is what the OP put, not come at me with all the abuse possible to add to the shit already going through her head. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it? Wait a week. Post the exact same thread from your account and you’ll know what judgement really is. " I’ve posted and been judged for it severely. I took solace from the few posters that reached out without judgment and helped. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it? White knight alert No, just someone who accepts that sometimes our behaviour falls below society’s expected standards. Mine has. Yours? " Yes of course but I wouldn’t lay myself open on a forum like this one | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
I knew by posting I wouldn’t have an easy time. I know that people are entitled to their own opinions on things. I’ve admitted it’s not my best moment,not denied it. "Thats fine of course, but you don't deserve abuse because of it. | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
Would you support a man who had posted the same thing?
If the answer is “yes” then I can’t fault you. If “no” then I have no time for you.
She didn’t ask for attacks but she opened herself up to that possibility
Male or female my reply would be the same.
"Thinking out loud" is what the OP put, not come at me with all the abuse possible to add to the shit already going through her head.
"Ok if you say so - good for you | |||
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The mr | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread."  | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself. I just think cheating on the one person that you’re supposed to love in his biggest moment of need is as low as you can go and that’s as polite as I can possibly be on this subject." Totally agree, I've refrained from commenting on the subject, but your right if it we're a bloke that posted it he'd be ripped a new arsehole. Not down with it at all. Mrs | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
I knew by posting I wouldn’t have an easy time. I know that people are entitled to their own opinions on things. I’ve admitted it’s not my best moment,not denied it.
Thats fine of course, but you don't deserve abuse because of it.
"Can you point out any abuse? There’s been strong opinions but no abuse directed at the OP. | |||
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"It’s really easy to judge others, isn’t it? White knight alert No, just someone who accepts that sometimes our behaviour falls below society’s expected standards. Mine has. Yours? Yes of course but I wouldn’t lay myself open on a forum like this one " Because you're feared of responses like yours? Judge not less thee be judged. (Shrugs) | |||
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"Op, carry on doing what you need to do in life to get you through this as well. So often the attention from everyone is always directed towards the person that's sick and the person stood back watching (you) is the one that also takes a massive hit health wise because you end up in a state yourself. Not eating,not sleeping, not taking care of yourself etc etc...you end up breaking yourself. The fact you've already said you have no intentions of meeting anyone on here or are after anything sexual tells most people that you are here because you need someone to talk too and not meet. Someone to listen to you, whilst you rant,rave,scream or cry your eyes out. No one has the right to slag you off for trying to seek a way through. Your husband has a brain tumour that's very unfortunate, your own mental health needs to have a release as well. Looking at an ex fwb /fb on here is just the memories you had of previous happy times popping into your head. That's nothing to be ashamed of either. No ones marriage is anyone's business especially on fab that part isn't for anyone to comment on or judge either. They don't know the reason for you joining originally and it's none of their business. Take care of yourself OP
She made it the business of others by posting on here.
She never ended her post asking people to attack her personally though did she.
I knew by posting I wouldn’t have an easy time. I know that people are entitled to their own opinions on things. I’ve admitted it’s not my best moment,not denied it.
Thats fine of course, but you don't deserve abuse because of it.
Can you point out any abuse? There’s been strong opinions but no abuse directed at the OP."I knew by posting this thread I’d provoke strong opinions. I knew I wasn't going to get an easy time because of it. People have differing opinions. It’s what makes everyone unique. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " you still with him?  | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. you still with him? "Husband yes absolutely. | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one. Why?" No answere yet. It would be my question too. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. you still with him?
Husband yes absolutely."do you love him? | |||
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"If there was ever a forum post that needs to be removed then it is this one. Why? No answere yet. It would be my question too." It's been answered, you'll just have to scroll to find it. | |||
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"This thread was always going to go this way, the OP was prepared for it From my perspective, I would hate to be in the position of the OP, and no way would I cheat, especially at this stage. However, if I was in the position of the husband, I'd completely understand if my partner found relief this way. Fortunately, I've not had to walk in any of those shoes. " I’ve made it expressly clear in my bio that I’m not going to meet anybody for the foreseeable future. That doesn’t mean I can’t still chat to people. I knew it would get heated. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " sympathise with you OP. we humans are strange beings, we do things that could hurt the ones we love the most. ignore the haters, concentrate on supporting your hubby at this time and keeping your own spirits up, try and stay sane, and don't overthink things. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. "  | |||
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"This thread was always going to go this way, the OP was prepared for it From my perspective, I would hate to be in the position of the OP, and no way would I cheat, especially at this stage. However, if I was in the position of the husband, I'd completely understand if my partner found relief this way. Fortunately, I've not had to walk in any of those shoes. I’ve made it expressly clear in my bio that I’m not going to meet anybody for the foreseeable future. That doesn’t mean I can’t still chat to people. I knew it would get heated." That was my point, I'd be understanding if my partner felt she needed the relief to remain strong for me. I couldn't do it though, because I would feel it's cheating. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. "There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. "Don't worry about what they think its your life | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. "Yes are and it's their own business and not everyone else's just like yours | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life "It’s not like I’ve killed anyone | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life
It’s not like I’ve killed anyone"exactly | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. "Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it 
Mrs
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
"Never said it was ok. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life
It’s not like I’ve killed anyone"It's ok killing people is an instinctive survival mechanism, don't worry about it. I've known many carers, for ill partners who have faced these kinds of dilemmas and conflicting emotions. Sometimes they are able to talk to their partners other times they aren't. Walk a mile in your shoes first is my opinion. And even then how I would handle it doesn't mean that's right for you. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life
It’s not like I’ve killed anyone"Please don't justify it with this....you've already acknowledged how fucked up you think it is.. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
"nothings black and white | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white "I'm logging off before I can't keep my mouth closed. And before anyone says "haven't walked in her shoes" I have! With dignity, respect and loyalty. Mrs | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white
I'm logging off before I can't keep my mouth closed.
And before anyone says "haven't walked in her shoes" I have! With dignity, respect and loyalty.
Mrs " | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white "Casablanca is. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white
Casablanca is."the film or the place? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."Hear hear | |||
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"Yeah pull yourself together woman! The best answer to someone going through a terrible time with mixed emotions and untold stress. " Mad as it sounds it probably is. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " If anyone on here dares to judge you, well, fuck them. We all have to deal with our own shit in our own way. I wish you both well. | |||
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"At the end of the day. You do whatever you need to do, to get you through this. Don't see any harm in you chatting with others. Even if it's only to vent your thoughts or just get a break for your problems. Because God knows its not an easy road your walking. So fuck the begrudgers. You do what you need to do. You are not Alone. Best wishes to you and your family. " | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white
I'm logging off before I can't keep my mouth closed.
And before anyone says "haven't walked in her shoes" I have! With dignity, respect and loyalty.
Mrs "Well thats good for you, illness is a difficult thing and caring is a difficult thing, also people cheat, people come on here and aren't honest about their situation, I'm not saying i agree with cheating but it doesn't bother me either, shes been fairly honest I'd say | |||
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"At the end of the day. You do whatever you need to do, to get you through this. Don't see any harm in you chatting with others. Even if it's only to vent your thoughts or just get a break for your problems. Because God knows its not an easy road your walking. So fuck the begrudgers. You do what you need to do. You are not Alone. Best wishes to you and your family. "Exactly | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."This just this!!!!!! | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white
Casablanca is.the film or the place? "I couldn't say, I've never been to the place. Do you think it would be like the Wizard of Oz and suddenly become a technicolour dream world? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. " No one should think they have the right to judge or force their opinion on anyone.. Sending hugs x | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know.
Well of others do it it's all ok isn't it
Mrs
nothings black and white
Casablanca is.the film or the place?
I couldn't say, I've never been to the place.
Do you think it would be like the Wizard of Oz and suddenly become a technicolour dream world?"naaaa tin mans made of tin | |||
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"The double standards, argh, they burn! I understand that some people are on here without their partner's knowledge but I will never knowingly meet with them. J" The collective moral code of fab is very difficult to understand. It's a real head scratcher. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself. I just think cheating on the one person that you’re supposed to love in his biggest moment of need is as low as you can go and that’s as polite as I can possibly be on this subject." Being on here and not meeting is in no way the same as cheating . Surely there’s a massive difference between thinking and doing … We all have reasons for being here | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? That’s a bit unfair. There’s all kinds of mental health stuff posted on these forums. With loads of support. People on here even support people who have done the most horrendous things sometimes (because aww it could be a mental health issue). So what about this lady? How do you know she isn’t suffering mental health issues because of all this?" How is asking the question unfair Nora? She hasn’t addressed her reasons for starting the thread even though she has posted since. I’m not judging her… she is judging herself and perhaps her judgment is leading to mental health issues. Whatever your views, everyone can agree she is in a shit place. Still, she is getting a lot of support here, even if it’s possibly not the best place to look for it. I’d still like to know her reasoning for posting the thread. My judgment is reserved for the fab double standard at play here. We all know that a married man on fab, playing without his wife’s consent, mentioning an ex FWB while discussing their wife’s brain tumour wouldn’t find a sympathetic ear. | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life
It’s not like I’ve killed anyone
Please don't justify it with this....you've already acknowledged how fucked up you think it is.."Horrendous ain't it  | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t.
There are a lot of people on here who are married & their spouses don’t know. Don't worry about what they think its your life
It’s not like I’ve killed anyone
Please don't justify it with this....you've already acknowledged how fucked up you think it is..
Horrendous ain't it "Yeah it is, acknowledge what your doing is fucked up, dont justify the back end of it, if your being a dick be a dick but don't pretend otherwise | |||
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"Being on here and not meeting is in no way the same as cheating . Surely there’s a massive difference between thinking and doing … We all have reasons for being here " She mentioned her ex FWB who she perves over, so we can assume she has had meets. | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."This | |||
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"Being on here and not meeting is in no way the same as cheating . Surely there’s a massive difference between thinking and doing … We all have reasons for being here She mentioned her ex FWB who she perves over, so we can assume she has had meets." You assume wrong. Since I joined here 4 weeks I’ve not met up with anybody. I’ve made it crystal clear I’m not meeting for the foreseeable future. It’s there on my bio. | |||
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"Being on here and not meeting is in no way the same as cheating . Surely there’s a massive difference between thinking and doing … We all have reasons for being here She mentioned her ex FWB who she perves over, so we can assume she has had meets. You assume wrong. Since I joined here 4 weeks I’ve not met up with anybody. I’ve made it crystal clear I’m not meeting for the foreseeable future. It’s there on my bio. " Let me ask are you on fab when your with your husband | |||
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"Does he know you’re on here and is he happy with what you’re doing? No he doesn’t. If I told you what I really thought I’d get a ban. Put your husband first and just know that most of these nice replies are by people who would absolutely flame a single man for posting this exact same thread. Totally respect your opinion. I get that it’s not for everybody. I’ve admitted it myself. I just think cheating on the one person that you’re supposed to love in his biggest moment of need is as low as you can go and that’s as polite as I can possibly be on this subject. Being on here and not meeting is in no way the same as cheating . Surely there’s a massive difference between thinking and doing … We all have reasons for being here " But she has been cheating previously and mentions looking at her ex fwb regularly. I think people are divided because many of us have lost people ourselves & wouldn't really think to be on fab during a partners illness , especially when they don't know and until recently the op had lots of identifying face pics up. People's views will vary due to their own experience ie there are several married people ,whose partners don't know offering support on the thread.Their opinions are going to be significantly different to those who don't cheat or have been cheated on in the past. Yes people judge ,we all judge others ,often through own experiences. Posting this sort of thread is going to invite people to criticize and comment. I hope you find the right support op & that your husband is comfortable. Miss | |||
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"Not my proudest moment. But you couldn’t resist tell everyone in the forum about it. What is the purpose of the post OP? To gain approval or condemnation? You’ll get approval from this who think it might help them get a leg over, and condemnation from those who know it’s royally fucked up. Which one are you after? That’s a bit unfair. There’s all kinds of mental health stuff posted on these forums. With loads of support. People on here even support people who have done the most horrendous things sometimes (because aww it could be a mental health issue). So what about this lady? How do you know she isn’t suffering mental health issues because of all this? How is asking the question unfair Nora? She hasn’t addressed her reasons for starting the thread even though she has posted since. I’m not judging her… she is judging herself and perhaps her judgment is leading to mental health issues. Whatever your views, everyone can agree she is in a shit place. Still, she is getting a lot of support here, even if it’s possibly not the best place to look for it. I’d still like to know her reasoning for posting the thread. My judgment is reserved for the fab double standard at play here. We all know that a married man on fab, playing without his wife’s consent, mentioning an ex FWB while discussing their wife’s brain tumour wouldn’t find a sympathetic ear. " It looks like Nora is 'out' and if you haven't got what you want from the OP by now it seems unlikely you will to me. Is this really the place to bring up gender unfairness? Reading above, it sounded like the OP knew there we was always going to be some sugar and some medicine from this thread. These situations scatter a lot of people, and the best advice is to look for bespoke help. It will help to pull things together. Because a lot of people who struggle with a situation like this focus on the effect it has on themselves rather than the reality itself. I always understand why people post personal stuff like this on Fab, but maybe a forum based on fellow sufferers/carers will offer more focused help here. pt | |||
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"You assume wrong. Since I joined here 4 weeks I’ve not met up with anybody. I’ve made it crystal clear I’m not meeting for the foreseeable future. It’s there on my bio. " In that case, allow me to pose a new question. Did you meet your ex fob on an older fab profile, and were those meetings with the knowledge and approval of your husband? | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. ."Exactly this OP sometimes we just need to | |||
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"You just do what you need to do. It’s nobody else’s business, although you’ve made it people’s business by posting it. Nobody knows what other people are going through. You’ll be judged on here of course you will. And for the record I think those who know me know I’d say exactly the same if it was a man who posted. Take care xx Those in glass houses should sit down & shut up I mean we all *think* we know what we’d do but until we’re in that position. I’m not saying it’s right,I know it’s not.
I’m a big believer, and always have been, that you cannot say exactly what you would do until you’re in a situation. "I’ve been in this position and am going to keep my thoughts to myself J x | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
Exactly this OP sometimes we just need to
"No we don't need to we tell ourselves we need to, it's all about, the want of escapism...Big difference between need and want | |||
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"That my husband has a brain tumour & I’m on here & not to mention that I’m still perving over my ex fwb. Not my proudest moment. Sometimes in the hardest moments you need the biggest distractions. .
Exactly this OP sometimes we just need to
No we don't need to we tell ourselves we need to, it's all about, the want of escapism...Big difference between need and want "Agree | |||
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"It’s mad isn’t it how men get absolutely slated for being on here behind their wives’ backs, but women - even a woman with a husband who has a fucking BRAIN TUMOR - get nothing but cuddles and reassurances and platitudes for cheating on their partners, hahahah!!! Fucking hell, the sexist double standards are insane!! Hahah" This thread is a good filter though | |||
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"There’s no defending this tbh. Don’t know why people are doing gymnastics to try "Because its the fab forums | |||
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"There’s no defending this tbh. Don’t know why people are doing gymnastics to try "Because boobs and flaps Pickle. Boobs and flaps. J | |||
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"It’s not just the cheating for me or the fact that her partner is unwell, it’s that, even TO HER, it’s wrong and yet she’s doing it and posting a thread about perving on an ex. Only with a gun to my head would I confess this" Only with a gun to my head would I do this | |||
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"There’s no defending this tbh. Don’t know why people are doing gymnastics to try "Because the whole ‘be kind’ thing has made some people feel they shouldn’t call someone out, even for the shittiest behaviour. | |||
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"It’s not just the cheating for me or the fact that her partner is unwell, it’s that, even TO HER, it’s wrong and yet she’s doing it and posting a thread about perving on an ex. Only with a gun to my head would I confess this" It's wrong on so many levels. | |||
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