FabSwingers.com forum: Burglar

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

All the chargers

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Wi-Fi router

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

The plugs from all the appliances.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ildmanYorksMan
over a year ago

Doncaster & Bembridge

"Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

I would steal you as you wouldn't be inconvenienced at all and would be highly pleasured

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unchalMan
over a year ago

Dartford

"Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

One sock from every pair.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *addad99Man
over a year ago

Rotherham /newquay

All the remote controls and toilet rolls

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

One sock from every pair. "

Someone’s already done that in this house!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

Have you ever seen the rage some women go on when they don't have batteries for their vibe? Warpath!

That's more than a mild inconvenience.

A single shoe and sock from each pair

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

The electric drill/screwdriver.

I can't live without mine.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

The light bulb from the fridge.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uietguy689Man
over a year ago

Abingdon

The tea towels and hand towels. Mrs steals them all to wash them but doesn't replace them and you only notice when you've just washed your hands...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

The front door.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

toilet roll

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

All his shoes

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For the ladies-

1 stocking from each pair

1 piece from matching lingerie whether it be panties, bra or suspender belt.

1 false nail so there are only 9

1 false eyelash.

For the gents-

TV remote

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Dental floss

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *.T.Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I'd take one of each kind of battery from remote controls, leaving you 1 AAA and 1 AA battery short and having to swap batteries around.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago

Gosport

[Removed by poster at 29/08/23 14:08:13]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago

Gosport

The spring that causes the doorbell to turn off again when you take your finger off the button.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

If it's inconvenience you're after, then I'd swap the full battery in your smoke detector for one that's nearly run down.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"For the ladies-

1 stocking from each pair

1 piece from matching lingerie whether it be panties, bra or suspender belt.

1 false nail so there are only 9

1 false eyelash.

For the gents-

TV remote

Ah Fred, you can be our burglar. Zero inconvenience to me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

The HDMI cable from their Sky etc box to the tv so they’re left with Freeview channels only.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tanley FunseekerMan
over a year ago

stanley

"Wi-Fi router "

Evil!!! Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

All the teaspoons. It always seems to annoy people in work when there's none.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The toilet seat

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *0nnyMan
over a year ago

walsall

The lightbulb out of every room

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andycandy88Woman
over a year ago

Northolt

Toothbrushes and toothpastes

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Spoons, let them eat soup with a fork

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

The left hand heating element out of each toaster slot.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *.T.Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"The left hand heating element out of each toaster slot. "
That is evil. And genius.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wi-Fi router "

Ouch

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The toilet seat"

No no no

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Pillow's

All the tea spoons

All the pens

Toilet roll

Tea towels

Bath towels.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d take all the labels from their tins.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The car keys

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The inside handle on the bedroom door. Then I can come back and steal the rest when they’re locked in.

Work smart don’t work hard.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eartsmanMan
over a year ago

southeast , midlands, southern France

Easy. Your phone

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

Has to be mobile phones

Just the wire for every appliance that you have.

Think of what you use and thats why

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon

The cardboard inner tubes from the toilet rolls, and the plugs from the sinks and bath..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The plugs from all the appliances. "

Thats just mean

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *enSiskoMan
over a year ago

Cestus 3

Their games console

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

Tissue rolls

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

One shoe or trainer from every single pair.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *dventurousSexplorersCouple
over a year ago

Fantasy Land

I’d take the base off their kettle and the curtain hooks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to practise saying the word burglar firstly lol

A shoe

Phone charger

Kettle

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

I'm stealing: her heart

taking: her breath away

embezzling: every minute that she can hold from me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *jphotMan
over a year ago

Stourbridge

All the mugs apart from the shit one that no one likes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm stealing: her heart

taking: her breath away

embezzling: every minute that she can hold from me."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abtastic Mr FoxMan
over a year ago

A den in the Glen

The rubber seal from the washing machine.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Steal the switches, or remote control sensors from each eletrical item.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *archelCouple
over a year ago

A field somewhere

Since washing on the line uses, in general, only 2 pegs, I would take every second peg.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

The milk and all the spoons

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *valanche1001Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Every second bulb in each lighting circuit

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

The keetle....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For the ladies-

1 stocking from each pair

1 piece from matching lingerie whether it be panties, bra or suspender belt.

1 false nail so there are only 9

1 false eyelash.

For the gents-

TV remote

Ah Fred, you can be our burglar. Zero inconvenience to me

Anytime J

Would Beef be upset?

No remote

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

"Spoons, let them eat soup with a fork "

Or serve soup in a mug.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *implymeABCMan
over a year ago

Taunton

The fuses from the plugs of all the appliances

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

All the chocolate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ooking4othersMan
over a year ago

Here ...

Take their wife

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of every sock.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he Silver FuxMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

I’d take the bottom bit of the cordless kettle, the shower hose and all the phone charging cables

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *azzasMan
over a year ago

Swillington

TV remote n shit roll

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm taking all the chargers phone/tablet/vibrator etc and I'm putting all the dildos, butt plugs etc in the freezer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

All the forks..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London | Belfast

I use a scissor to cut off all the little flaps on the milk so you won't be able to open them. Also you'd be pretty inconvenienced without your phone, television, car and cash at home

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ady CurvaceousWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I'd empty the coffee jar.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

I've come back for your computer mouse.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Washers from taps, so you get a constant annoying drip.

Remote control

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The toilet seats.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tissue rolls"

No no. It has so many uses

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Washers from taps, so you get a constant annoying drip.

Remote control

Nope I'd not be able to cope. Can't even have a clock that ticks. Drives me nuts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

All the toilet seats

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the teaspoons. Try getting stuff out of jars with those big dessert spoons!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm stealing: her heart

taking: her breath away

embezzling: every minute that she can hold from me."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The spring that causes the doorbell to turn off again when you take your finger off the button."

Love it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the toilet roll and their favourite pillow

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spoons, let them eat soup with a fork

Or serve soup in a mug.

Good point

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"One shoe or trainer from every single pair."

I'd be back before you'd managed to do that... We're a household of 4 adults including 2 women

Nita

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ifeIsntSeriousMan
over a year ago

Rugby

All the forks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/08/23 22:53:49]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *amesy8519Man
over a year ago

Hampshire

Handles from the wardrobes / chest of drawers etc.

The plastic base with the wheels that the playe from the microwave sits on.

Brush / cloth to wash the dishes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *unthum62Man
over a year ago

Benidorm

The vowel keys from every keyboard..

Th t w ll f ck th m.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Handles from the wardrobes / chest of drawers etc.

The plastic base with the wheels that the playe from the microwave sits on.

Brush / cloth to wash the dishes.

Oh handles. That's a good one.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aughtywifeandhimCouple
over a year ago

bedford

Tv remote and bath plug ??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the keys

doors, windows, cars and or motorbikes

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ester.jamesMan
over a year ago

birmingham

"Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

I use these as insults to my mates or to be cheeky

The nails holding up picture frames and clocks

All the left shoe laces

A single battery out of everything

Ten percent of the carpet

The corks or tops of lids to drinks especially alcohol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ischief ManagedCouple
over a year ago

manchester

The contents of the throw anything in draw , because at somepoint they will want that little plastic stopper or spare ikea screw.

That'll screw them over

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ester.jamesMan
over a year ago

birmingham

"The contents of the throw anything in draw , because at somepoint they will want that little plastic stopper or spare ikea screw.

That'll screw them over

Evil but very puny

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago

Leigh-on-Sea

Door handles

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago

Leigh-on-Sea

"Door handles"

And maybe the lock from the bathroom door

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d take all the labels from their tins."

Actually that kinda sounds like fun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toilet paper

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he night owlMan
over a year ago

East Midlands

Bottle openers, corkscrews and anything that tells the time

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

I'm changing there WiFi password

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *onnie 90Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

The rod that goes between both handles on a door. I'd take all of them except the doors to street/garden so they could get in their house but not into any rooms.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ingleguyforfunswMan
over a year ago

Cornwall

Panties

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the laces from shoes/runners

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

"Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Because I stole your ability to!

Mildly inconvenience at its best

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

"Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Because I stole your ability to!

Mildly inconvenience at its best

Ok that actually made me laugh

I needed that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Because I stole your ability to!

Mildly inconvenience at its best

Thats one of my favourite posts this year lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The paper from the teabags

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

"Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Because I stole your ability to!

Mildly inconvenience at its best

Ok that actually made me laugh

I needed that "

Glad I could help good sir!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bottle openers, corkscrews and anything that tells the time "

Please not the bottle openers. How would I open my wine.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oco_marsWoman
over a year ago

Stockport

Labels off all of the cans! And the microwave plate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ingu and The ApeCouple
over a year ago

The Igloo

Given the current heat, the keys to the locked windows.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nitterWoman
over a year ago

the land of tall tales and yarn

The butter

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *annabarberaCouple
over a year ago

Staffs

Batteries out of vibrators

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please, I can’t even pronounce Burglar

Because I stole your ability to!

Mildly inconvenience at its best

Ok that actually made me laugh

I needed that "

It was funny to be fair

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aximus2589Man
over a year ago

st.helens

Door handel

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rAitchMan
over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

The tongue from their belt buckle.

The scroll wheel from their mouse.

The power on/off buttons from their remotes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago

Leigh-on-Sea

The fuses from all the plugs in the house

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

The bath n shower taps

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Given the current heat, the keys to the locked windows. "

Oh good idea. Everyone inside would have to get naked then to cool down

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The bath n shower taps"

Not at the minute please

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuses from all the plugs. Nobody ever has spares.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ester.jamesMan
over a year ago

birmingham

"The bath n shower taps

Not at the minute please

Lmao just mid relaxation haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ester.jamesMan
over a year ago

birmingham

"Given the current heat, the keys to the locked windows.

Oh good idea. Everyone inside would have to get naked then to cool down

On this note I believe the handles to all wardrobes and draws with clothes will be my theft. Just to help x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Fuses from all the plugs. Nobody ever has spares."

That's true. I only ever buy them as needed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aleforfun22Man
over a year ago

Lancashire

Mobile phone charger .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Photo editing software off of laptops would be a good one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illy IdolMan
over a year ago

Midlands

I'm stealing the clothes hangers

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ohnny4playMan
over a year ago

Kinross

Handles off wardrobes, drawers and cupboards.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ohnny4playMan
over a year ago

Kinross

The end of forum threads!

Can we continue with holiday pt2 please OP

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Ethernet lead plugs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inAndTonic21Couple
over a year ago

Merseyside

Wi-Fi password

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reland8Man
over a year ago

sandyford

I would steal the next instalment of “the holiday” story

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't take anything but I would unwind the feet of every appliance in the kitchen so they're all tippy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *immyinreadingMan
over a year ago

henley on thames

"Your a burglar but you can only steal things that mildly inconvenience your victim. What are you taking ?

I'm taking the plate that goes in the microwave and the battery from a vibaratior

The ice cream maker

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rungeguyMan
37 weeks ago

leeds

The woman’s innocence

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he turned me GreyCouple
37 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

Their sex toys

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *r TriomanMan
37 weeks ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

I wouldn't steal anything, I'd just hide their car key in the fridge; it would amuse me knowing that when they eventually find it, they'd be wondering what how the hell they did that.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
37 weeks ago

Central

The inner springs, that allow some of their switches to work

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ools and the brainCouple
37 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

I'd replace all their shoes with ones exactly the same but one size smaller.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread