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"I'm assuming a lack of "manners and respect" in this context means "not replying"" Either that or a response being “thank you, you’re not my type”. | |||
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"If someone has been abusive to you in private messages then you should block them and report to admins." Not necessarily abuse but I just don't appreciate rude and ignorant folks. I always block abusive people. Not reported anyone yet. Let's hope I should not have to.. | |||
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"I am curious that some ladies on their profiles ask for manners and respect but then don't give the same back? I am curious as I am always a gentleman..." In what way are you saying we do not give respect OP | |||
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"If someone has been abusive to you in private messages then you should block them and report to admins. Not necessarily abuse but I just don't appreciate rude and ignorant folks. I always block abusive people. Not reported anyone yet. Let's hope I should not have to.. " How were they being rude or ignorant? By not replying? | |||
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"I'm assuming a lack of "manners and respect" in this context means "not replying"" No you are assuming that's the case. It's not.  | |||
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"Not necessarily abuse but I just don't appreciate rude and ignorant folks. I always block abusive people. Not reported anyone yet. Let's hope I should not have to.. " What do you consider rude and ignorant though OP? | |||
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"I'm assuming a lack of "manners and respect" in this context means "not replying" No you are assuming that's the case. It's not. "Context may help. | |||
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"In what way are they not? Please don't tell me this isn't another no response thread "When folks put in their profile that manners cost nothing and then don't have any manners themselves...thats what I mean. | |||
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"If someone has been abusive to you in private messages then you should block them and report to admins. Not necessarily abuse but I just don't appreciate rude and ignorant folks. I always block abusive people. Not reported anyone yet. Let's hope I should not have to.. How were they being rude or ignorant? By not replying? " Again you are assuming it's about not replying... It's not. | |||
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"In what way are they not? Please don't tell me this isn't another no response thread
When folks put in their profile that manners cost nothing and then don't have any manners themselves...thats what I mean."Jesus it's like pulling teeth. What do you mean? What are these people doing or saying that is so very impolite? | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all "So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person? | |||
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"If someone has been abusive to you in private messages then you should block them and report to admins. Not necessarily abuse but I just don't appreciate rude and ignorant folks. I always block abusive people. Not reported anyone yet. Let's hope I should not have to.. How were they being rude or ignorant? By not replying? Again you are assuming it's about not replying... It's not." I wouldn't sweat it. You can't control what other people do/say. Block and move on, and report them if it's abusive. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all "Sorry but you just contradicted yourself. So you need manners and respect to approach me but if i do that correctly then you can be rude and just ignore me? That does not make any sense and does not show any empathy for the other person. Just putting my thoughts out. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all
So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person?
"If I'm walking along minding my own business and someone I've never seen before in my life asks me a question? Depends what it's about. Where did you get those shoes, can you tell me where to find X place, actual questions will usually get a response. How are you will get a complete blank, strangers don't need to know how I'm feeling. Can I buy you a drink or questions I consider rude or intrusive would also be completely ignored. | |||
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"Sorry but you just contradicted yourself. So you need manners and respect to approach me but if i do that correctly then you can be rude and just ignore me? That does not make any sense and does not show any empathy for the other person. Just putting my thoughts out." Where's the contradiction? If I'm initiating contact and approaching someone then I will use appropriate manners. But, same as I don't personally call up every takeaway that posts leaflets through my door to let them know they're not for me, if I didn't request the contact and the content doesn't interest me, it just goes on the bin pile. Though, to be fair, I usually do send a No thanks on here. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all
So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person?
If I'm walking along minding my own business and someone I've never seen before in my life asks me a question?
Depends what it's about. Where did you get those shoes, can you tell me where to find X place, actual questions will usually get a response. How are you will get a complete blank, strangers don't need to know how I'm feeling. Can I buy you a drink or questions I consider rude or intrusive would also be completely ignored."I absolutely agree with you 100%. But small talk like hi, how are you etc. Is how conversations usually start. I think with online communication people forget that there is actually human being on the other end of that keyboard.. | |||
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"I absolutely agree with you 100%. But small talk like hi, how are you etc. Is how conversations usually start. I think with online communication people forget that there is actually human being on the other end of that keyboard.." Maybe usually. Not for me. My profile isn't unclear that I despise small talk, so on here it's less excusable than someone approaching that way on a night out. | |||
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"So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person? " Sorry it may seem we are all ganging up on you OP but .... If someone came up to you on the street and say "wanna fuck?" (the kind of messages I get) then yes, I would ignore them on the streets too... | |||
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"We usually try to be respectful and have manners but sometimes people just don't listen and have to be told in the bluntest terms possible " I can totally understand that. Yes sometimes people don't get the message first time and you need to be more blunt. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all
So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person?
If I'm walking along minding my own business and someone I've never seen before in my life asks me a question?
Depends what it's about. Where did you get those shoes, can you tell me where to find X place, actual questions will usually get a response. How are you will get a complete blank, strangers don't need to know how I'm feeling. Can I buy you a drink or questions I consider rude or intrusive would also be completely ignored.
I absolutely agree with you 100%.
But small talk like hi, how are you etc. Is how conversations usually start.
I think with online communication people forget that there is actually human being on the other end of that keyboard.."So it is about someone not replying to what you think is a polite message that you’ve sent? To play devils advocate there’s a human on the other end of the message you’ve sent and if you’re sending a “hi how are you” type message, what if that person has already received 20 of those messages already that day? And every time they tried to reply to say no thanks they received “why not” or worse abuse back then it makes it easier to just delete and not reply to future messages. But good luck OP; getting involved in the forums and blethering to folk in here or looking at going to socials tend to work a bit better on fab for some | |||
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"We usually try to be respectful and have manners but sometimes people just don't listen and have to be told in the bluntest terms possible I can totally understand that. Yes sometimes people don't get the message first time and you need to be more blunt." I think that’s the point entirely OP. The recipient doesn’t NEED to be anything. That isn’t rude or ignorant. It’s simply a fact of life. Unrequited advances of any type either online or in real life are just that. Unrequited. Please do think about that. And good luck to you  | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all "The whole “unsolicited” thing… I’m not sure I agree that you can have an unsolicited message on fab as by having a profile on here, visible, and with filters not used, then you are by participation soliciting messages. Messages received are often considered similar to junk mail. I disagree. It’s not like you’re walking down the street and you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. It’s more like you’ve entered an overseas property exhibition and as you walk the halls you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. To you get my comparison? In any case, that isn’t what the OP is talking about. If it’s double standards, then I’ve experienced this here, and in some unexpected situations. | |||
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" The whole “unsolicited” thing… I’m not sure I agree that you can have an unsolicited message on fab as by having a profile on here, visible, and with filters not used, then you are by participation soliciting messages. Messages received are often considered similar to junk mail. I disagree. It’s not like you’re walking down the street and you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. It’s more like you’ve entered an overseas property exhibition and as you walk the halls you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. To you get my comparison? In any case, that isn’t what the OP is talking about. If it’s double standards, then I’ve experienced this here, and in some unexpected situations." Honestly it's more like walking through a butchers street market looking for a nice sirloin, and getting repeatedly slapped in the face by mediocre scraps being hurled at you from vendors operating out of a carrier bag of offal. But if you want to think of it as a timeshare thing, it should still be obvious when someone is not your target market for the product you're actually selling, and if the product offered is obviously incompatible then is it worth acknowledging at all? Most people will start out with a polite no thanks, but after the 300th or so obviously incompatible one, it's natural to give up and just keep walking until you find a suitable timeshare. Unfortunately there isn't a filter for actually interesting people. My profile text would say enough to work as a filter, if there was a way to filter out people who haven't read it. By leaving filters open for the rare person of interest, I don't owe the 600 unwanted noodles who didn't bother to read the basic information available to them anything at all. But, again, I do actually usually reply. The point is that no-one has to. Add in that the site rules and FAQ outright say that no response is a no thanks, there really is no room to argue that anyone owes anyone a response on here. | |||
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"So if someone asks you an unsolicited question in the streets for example you would completely ignore that person? Sorry it may seem we are all ganging up on you OP but .... If someone came up to you on the street and say "wanna fuck?" (the kind of messages I get) then yes, I would ignore them on the streets too..." Someone saying that on the street is neither manners or respect,it's sexual harassment. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all "This has nowt to do with me, but thank you for your response. | |||
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"In what way are they not? Please don't tell me this isn't another no response thread "Thank you. | |||
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"https://m.fabswingers.com/articles/FAQ#noreply Or do you mean they didn’t say please/thank you and we’re rude that way? If you’re not going to elaborate a bit then we can’t respond to your specific dilemma "Not respond, but rather berate. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all "The rules state you don't but its basic good manners | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all
Sorry but you just contradicted yourself.
So you need manners and respect to approach me but if i do that correctly then you can be rude and just ignore me? That does not make any sense and does not show any empathy for the other person.
Just putting my thoughts out."my man if he has noticed then the count is 2 so far today. | |||
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"Best not to send messages or respond to lack of manners op. Join in with forum/cam room chat and treat fab as a social club. Good luck!" agreed. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners "Trouble is some if not most women get 100s of messages and it's impossible for the to read them all let alone respond to them, I've seen it first hand and I can understand how over whelming it can be.... Plus I've read some of the messages she got sent and believe me if you said that to someone in public you'd be arrested so why do some people think it's ok to say it here?? | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
Trouble is some if not most women get 100s of messages and it's impossible for the to read them all let alone respond to them, I've seen it first hand and I can understand how over whelming it can be.... Plus I've read some of the messages she got sent and believe me if you said that to someone in public you'd be arrested so why do some people think it's ok to say it here?? "And when I say 100s than can literally be with in 20 minutes. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners "That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum  ) | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum )"lol thats not good use of your time | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum )lol thats not good use of your time "What if I meet my forever guy here?  | |||
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" The whole “unsolicited” thing… I’m not sure I agree that you can have an unsolicited message on fab as by having a profile on here, visible, and with filters not used, then you are by participation soliciting messages. Messages received are often considered similar to junk mail. I disagree. It’s not like you’re walking down the street and you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. It’s more like you’ve entered an overseas property exhibition and as you walk the halls you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. To you get my comparison? In any case, that isn’t what the OP is talking about. If it’s double standards, then I’ve experienced this here, and in some unexpected situations. Honestly it's more like walking through a butchers street market looking for a nice sirloin, and getting repeatedly slapped in the face by mediocre scraps being hurled at you from vendors operating out of a carrier bag of offal. But if you want to think of it as a timeshare thing, it should still be obvious when someone is not your target market for the product you're actually selling, and if the product offered is obviously incompatible then is it worth acknowledging at all? Most people will start out with a polite no thanks, but after the 300th or so obviously incompatible one, it's natural to give up and just keep walking until you find a suitable timeshare. Unfortunately there isn't a filter for actually interesting people. My profile text would say enough to work as a filter, if there was a way to filter out people who haven't read it. By leaving filters open for the rare person of interest, I don't owe the 600 unwanted noodles who didn't bother to read the basic information available to them anything at all. But, again, I do actually usually reply. The point is that no-one has to. Add in that the site rules and FAQ outright say that no response is a no thanks, there really is no room to argue that anyone owes anyone a response on here." Good riposte, though not quite along the same line. What we can agree on is that there is no quality filter. Personally, when I do send an initial message (and that’s becoming quite rare now) I will only message those profiles of genuine interest to me, with whom I appear to be compatible and I match what they are looking for. Given that I write a unique message each time, it is in my own interest that I only message profiles where the above is true. If an opening message is simply “Hi” or a single short sentence and if the profile of the sender is of no interest then replying can hardly be expected. (But if you were passing someone in the street and they acknowledged you with “Good morning” would you not respond?) If on the other hand your profile said a lot about you, and you received an initial message that was clearly unique, showed that your profile was read fully, and the message addressed that, what they liked about you, and how they felt you were a good match… would that deserve a response? So the “rules” state no reply is no interest (a natural assumption of mine regardless of “rules”). You can forgive people who after a while of tailoring messages they simply stop putting in the effort. But always remember, wether sending or receiving messages, a profile is a person (or persons) and if you can be nothing else, be kind. | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum )lol thats not good use of your time
What if I meet my forever guy here? "Really you're looking for a forever guy here omg i could be it, him, the person | |||
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"Good riposte, though not quite along the same line. What we can agree on is that there is no quality filter. Personally, when I do send an initial message (and that’s becoming quite rare now) I will only message those profiles of genuine interest to me, with whom I appear to be compatible and I match what they are looking for. Given that I write a unique message each time, it is in my own interest that I only message profiles where the above is true. If an opening message is simply “Hi” or a single short sentence and if the profile of the sender is of no interest then replying can hardly be expected. (But if you were passing someone in the street and they acknowledged you with “Good morning” would you not respond?) If on the other hand your profile said a lot about you, and you received an initial message that was clearly unique, showed that your profile was read fully, and the message addressed that, what they liked about you, and how they felt you were a good match… would that deserve a response? So the “rules” state no reply is no interest (a natural assumption of mine regardless of “rules”). You can forgive people who after a while of tailoring messages they simply stop putting in the effort. But always remember, wether sending or receiving messages, a profile is a person (or persons) and if you can be nothing else, be kind. " As I said, I do actually reply in most cases. You say that after a while of tailoring messages and not getting a positive response it's natural to stop bothering to put in the effort. How is that different to sliding down to follow the site FAQs of no response is no thank you? Particularly when replying with even a polite no thanks often results in either whining and coercion or insults, and means that if you ever do choose to utilise the message filters for that group that person is now immune because you've sent them a message previously. It's nice to be nice. It's not nice to place expectations on strangers who have not initiated contact with you. | |||
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" The whole “unsolicited” thing… I’m not sure I agree that you can have an unsolicited message on fab as by having a profile on here, visible, and with filters not used, then you are by participation soliciting messages. Messages received are often considered similar to junk mail. I disagree. It’s not like you’re walking down the street and you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. It’s more like you’ve entered an overseas property exhibition and as you walk the halls you get stopped to see if you’re interested in buying a timeshare. To you get my comparison? In any case, that isn’t what the OP is talking about. If it’s double standards, then I’ve experienced this here, and in some unexpected situations. Honestly it's more like walking through a butchers street market looking for a nice sirloin, and getting repeatedly slapped in the face by mediocre scraps being hurled at you from vendors operating out of a carrier bag of offal. But if you want to think of it as a timeshare thing, it should still be obvious when someone is not your target market for the product you're actually selling, and if the product offered is obviously incompatible then is it worth acknowledging at all? Most people will start out with a polite no thanks, but after the 300th or so obviously incompatible one, it's natural to give up and just keep walking until you find a suitable timeshare. Unfortunately there isn't a filter for actually interesting people. My profile text would say enough to work as a filter, if there was a way to filter out people who haven't read it. By leaving filters open for the rare person of interest, I don't owe the 600 unwanted noodles who didn't bother to read the basic information available to them anything at all. But, again, I do actually usually reply. The point is that no-one has to. Add in that the site rules and FAQ outright say that no response is a no thanks, there really is no room to argue that anyone owes anyone a response on here. Good riposte, though not quite along the same line. What we can agree on is that there is no quality filter. Personally, when I do send an initial message (and that’s becoming quite rare now) I will only message those profiles of genuine interest to me, with whom I appear to be compatible and I match what they are looking for. Given that I write a unique message each time, it is in my own interest that I only message profiles where the above is true. If an opening message is simply “Hi” or a single short sentence and if the profile of the sender is of no interest then replying can hardly be expected. (But if you were passing someone in the street and they acknowledged you with “Good morning” would you not respond?) If on the other hand your profile said a lot about you, and you received an initial message that was clearly unique, showed that your profile was read fully, and the message addressed that, what they liked about you, and how they felt you were a good match… would that deserve a response? So the “rules” state no reply is no interest (a natural assumption of mine regardless of “rules”). You can forgive people who after a while of tailoring messages they simply stop putting in the effort. But always remember, wether sending or receiving messages, a profile is a person (or persons) and if you can be nothing else, be kind. " Yes totally agree with this approach and i generally don't send introductory messages, how after all that effort of typing out a tailored message based on the target profile (which is asked for by many) can he not expect a reply even a no thanks not for us followed by a block | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum )lol thats not good use of your time
What if I meet my forever guy here? Really you're looking for a forever guy here omg i could be it, him, the person "Where else am I going to find my kinky other half... And yeah it could be you  | |||
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"Because if someone is approaching you, respect and manners are a pretty basic request. If someone is contacting you unsolicited, you don't owe them a response at all The rules state you don't but its basic good manners
That's your perception. I couldn't care less that a person who sent me a message here thought I was rude for not responding. I have better things to do with my time )like be present in the forum )lol thats not good use of your time
What if I meet my forever guy here? Really you're looking for a forever guy here omg i could be it, him, the person
Where else am I going to find my kinky other half... And yeah it could be you "ahhh see | |||
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Trustpilot review from Prey | |||
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"If people are rude in response, all you can do is block them OP. Still waiting for your elucidation of what "rude" means to you. " Don't tell her she'll use it against you | |||
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"If people are rude in response, all you can do is block them OP. Still waiting for your elucidation of what "rude" means to you. Don't tell her she'll use it against you "Three guesses what "rude" means to me. | |||
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"It's nice to be nice. It's not nice to place expectations on strangers who have not initiated contact with you." There’s the rub… The “expectation” as you describe it isn’t unique to Fab, rather how we behave in polite society. That Fab is online should be irrelevant. Excusing one side of behaviour was the OPs original point… and then messages just become FAF? We all should treat each other with courtesy and respect. No nasty initial messages, no abusive responses. Wouldn’t that make Fab a nicer place for all? | |||
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"If people are rude in response, all you can do is block them OP. Still waiting for your elucidation of what "rude" means to you. Don't tell her she'll use it against you
Three guesses what "rude" means to me. "lol | |||
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"It's nice to be nice. It's not nice to place expectations on strangers who have not initiated contact with you. There’s the rub… The “expectation” as you describe it isn’t unique to Fab, rather how we behave in polite society. That Fab is online should be irrelevant. Excusing one side of behaviour was the OPs original point… and then messages just become FAF? We all should treat each other with courtesy and respect. No nasty initial messages, no abusive responses. Wouldn’t that make Fab a nicer place for all?" I don't disagree. Aside from the simple fact that no response is a perfectly valid reaction to undesirable messages. | |||
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""honestly it's more like walking through a butchers street market looking for a nice sirloin, and getting repeatedly slapped in the face by mediocre scraps being hurled at you from vendors operating out of a carrier bag of offal." Trustpilot review from Prey "omg its a joy to read your posts | |||
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"I am curious that some ladies on their profiles ask for manners and respect but then don't give the same back? I am curious as I am always a gentleman..." as a gentleman, I respect others peilel time so believe it is good manners to give without expecting to receive. See what is did there ?  | |||
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