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Insomnia - A Cure All or Old Wives Tale?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Siren's been having lots of trouble getting to sleep recently. She manages to doze off after two hours of tossing n turning, shoving various pillows under her 'bump' in a vain attempt to reach a modicum of comfort and then finally gets her head down until I come up two minutes later and start fiddling with her - this is usually about 3am after I've 'allowed' sufficient time for her to get to sleep, which seems a bit stupid to me coz I know I'll only wake her up when I do go up but then if I go up at the same time as her I'll probably start fiddling with her then neither of us will get any sleep....

~

I digress, ...aaaaaanyway, afdter one such night of fruitless slumbering last week, we were both lying there fully awake at 4am and as her sex drive has fucked off on holiday for 9 months we got to talking about sleep remedies.

There is counting sheep, which tbh is a load of baaallocks....

Then there is me massaging her back, good for her, not so good for me coz I know eventually my hands will wander then we're back to square one ffs!...

Then I came up with what I thought was a brainstorm!

I suggested that instead of counting sheep she should grasp my John Thomas firmly and then move her hand up and down and see if she could count to 100. I bet her she couldn't before falling asleep.

Alas, she didn't buy it.

I could have sworn it was old Granny Wishy who told me that was a good cure all for insomnia - or was it Paul the Perve from the Youth Club many moons ago... can't remember..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ha ha would love to be in your bedroom i would piss myself laughing at ya convos lol

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ok i will answer this seriously being a life long insominac. I do take medication but some natural rememdies are lavender on the pillow. Eating mango's and not having a husband interfere with you at 3am lol

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By *ebzStarWoman
over a year ago

Notting


"Ok i will answer this seriously being a life long insominac. I do take medication but some natural rememdies are lavender on the pillow. Eating mango's and not having a husband interfere with you at 3am lol"

NOT having a husband interfere at 3am!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"ha ha would love to be in your bedroom i would piss myself laughing at ya convos lol"

Hmm... TWO pregnant women in my bedroom at the same time? ... Fuck, Yeah!! Bring it on!... puuuuuuuurrrrrlease!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have sky in the bedroom get her to watch the shopping channel lol

(if it fails to make her sleep at least it will make her feel better pmsl just hide the credit card)

Im asleep in mins with that lol

Craig x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i listen to LBC every night, some nights it bores me to sleep and others i am in fits of giggles with the nutters calling in, it can be hit or miss lol

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By *orkshiremonkey1Man
over a year ago

Worksop


"Siren's been having lots of trouble getting to sleep recently. She manages to doze off after two hours of tossing n turning, shoving various pillows under her 'bump' in a vain attempt to reach a modicum of comfort and then finally gets her head down until I come up two minutes later and start fiddling with her - this is usually about 3am after I've 'allowed' sufficient time for her to get to sleep, which seems a bit stupid to me coz I know I'll only wake her up when I do go up but then if I go up at the same time as her I'll probably start fiddling with her then neither of us will get any sleep....

~

I digress, ...aaaaaanyway, afdter one such night of fruitless slumbering last week, we were both lying there fully awake at 4am and as her sex drive has fucked off on holiday for 9 months we got to talking about sleep remedies.

There is counting sheep, which tbh is a load of baaallocks....

Then there is me massaging her back, good for her, not so good for me coz I know eventually my hands will wander then we're back to square one ffs!...

Then I came up with what I thought was a brainstorm!

I suggested that instead of counting sheep she should grasp my John Thomas firmly and then move her hand up and down and see if she could count to 100. I bet her she couldn't before falling asleep.

Alas, she didn't buy it.

I could have sworn it was old Granny Wishy who told me that was a good cure all for insomnia - or was it Paul the Perve from the Youth Club many moons ago... can't remember.."

THe counting sheep thing is an urban myth as counting stimulates the brain and makes you more awake, as does watching TV interestingly enough.

I find that a warm, milky drink (boring fart I know) help as it contains chemicals which stimulate the release of seratonin (I think !!!! lol). Also try turning off the TV about 1/2 hour before bedtime and have a warm bath with a lavender bubblebath or something that relaxes.

Other than that, go for a few pints (a lot in some cases) and collapse on the sofa lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

....just woke up, I fell asleep reading this page, no word of a lie!

Not being cheeky, I have had difficulty sleeping for years and even sleeping pills have been known to fail.

I have found reading before sleep often sends me off to the land of nod as does a game of solitaire on my laptop...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find lavender is absolutely brilliant, although it will make you smell like an old lady. I do find that when i really can't sleep because somethings on my mind, counting back from 100 slowly and without concentrating too hard on the numbers helps. You have to let your mind wander, then when you realise you've stopped counting, carry on from the last number you remember thinking of. It works for me.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"I find lavender is absolutely brilliant, although it will make you smell like an old lady. I do find that when i really can't sleep because somethings on my mind, counting back from 100 slowly and without concentrating too hard on the numbers helps. You have to let your mind wander, then when you realise you've stopped counting, carry on from the last number you remember thinking of. It works for me."

Read a book but hold the book above your eyeline so that you have to look up to read it ...this makes the eyes tired very quickly and triggers a sleep response ...its why hypnotists used to swing a watch or something in front of the eyes they would hold it high to trigger the early sleep stage

give it a go ...works for me in 10 mins

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"I find lavender is absolutely brilliant, although it will make you smell like an old lady. I do find that when i really can't sleep because somethings on my mind, counting back from 100 slowly and without concentrating too hard on the numbers helps. You have to let your mind wander, then when you realise you've stopped counting, carry on from the last number you remember thinking of. It works for me.

Read a book but hold the book above your eyeline so that you have to look up to read it ...this makes the eyes tired very quickly and triggers a sleep response ...its why hypnotists used to swing a watch or something in front of the eyes they would hold it high to trigger the early sleep stage

give it a go ...works for me in 10 mins "

I was hypnotised once lol...no don't even ask what the guy made me do

I can never fall aseep straight away and always lay there thinking about the most unimportant things that somehow turn into very important things and whats worse is that Rob will fall asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow grrrr

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"I find lavender is absolutely brilliant, although it will make you smell like an old lady. I do find that when i really can't sleep because somethings on my mind, counting back from 100 slowly and without concentrating too hard on the numbers helps. You have to let your mind wander, then when you realise you've stopped counting, carry on from the last number you remember thinking of. It works for me.

Read a book but hold the book above your eyeline so that you have to look up to read it ...this makes the eyes tired very quickly and triggers a sleep response ...its why hypnotists used to swing a watch or something in front of the eyes they would hold it high to trigger the early sleep stage

give it a go ...works for me in 10 mins

I was hypnotised once lol...no don't even ask what the guy made me do

I can never fall aseep straight away and always lay there thinking about the most unimportant things that somehow turn into very important things and whats worse is that Rob will fall asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow grrrr"

tell us what you did and what it felt like ...were you aware ?....did you remember ? i am studying hypnotism now ...i find it facinating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gotta ask now honeypot, what did he make you do?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Gotta ask now honeypot, what did he make you do?"

If I tell ya I gotta kill ya lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Gotta ask now honeypot, what did he make you do?

If I tell ya I gotta kill ya lol"

its worth it i would die a happy man ....did you snort like a pig on all 4s ...pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Pmsl...I was aware of everything but others could'nt remember a thing and some could'nt be hypnotised at all

At one point I had to look at the person next to me and imagine that he was the most gorgeous man id ever seen!

this was before my swinging days which was lucky as what was family entertainment could have turned horribly wrong lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Pmsl...I was aware of everything but others could'nt remember a thing and some could'nt be hypnotised at all

At one point I had to look at the person next to me and imagine that he was the most gorgeous man id ever seen!

this was before my swinging days which was lucky as what was family entertainment could have turned horribly wrong lol "

LOL....imagine if you had of jumped him on stage ...were you aware of his true looks ?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Pmsl...I was aware of everything but others could'nt remember a thing and some could'nt be hypnotised at all

At one point I had to look at the person next to me and imagine that he was the most gorgeous man id ever seen!

this was before my swinging days which was lucky as what was family entertainment could have turned horribly wrong lol

LOL....imagine if you had of jumped him on stage ...were you aware of his true looks ?"

OMG yes but I could'nt stop myself from wrapping myself around him and kissing his neck!!! its all on film as well lol

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Pmsl...I was aware of everything but others could'nt remember a thing and some could'nt be hypnotised at all

At one point I had to look at the person next to me and imagine that he was the most gorgeous man id ever seen!

this was before my swinging days which was lucky as what was family entertainment could have turned horribly wrong lol

LOL....imagine if you had of jumped him on stage ...were you aware of his true looks ?

OMG yes but I could'nt stop myself from wrapping myself around him and kissing his neck!!! its all on film as well lol"

LOL so funny ....but what compeeled you if you saw his true looks

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Pmsl...I was aware of everything but others could'nt remember a thing and some could'nt be hypnotised at all

At one point I had to look at the person next to me and imagine that he was the most gorgeous man id ever seen!

this was before my swinging days which was lucky as what was family entertainment could have turned horribly wrong lol

LOL....imagine if you had of jumped him on stage ...were you aware of his true looks ?

OMG yes but I could'nt stop myself from wrapping myself around him and kissing his neck!!! its all on film as well lol

LOL so funny ....but what compeeled you if you saw his true looks "

sorry compelled

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