FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

On the sick

Jump to newest
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

Im just curious (and it will divide opinion)

How many people think its OK to go on the sick with stress people they are annoyed at their managers?

Im in NO WAY taking a knock at people who truly go off sick with stress.

More so people who get told off/disagree with their boss and then go off ok the sick with it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it has caused them enough stress to be ill, then yes.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Are they signed off by a doctor or self certificated?

I've known people physically collapse from stress, however it's caused

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me. "

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle Miss TinkerbellWoman
over a year ago

your head


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem."

How can you say if its genuine or not though?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle Miss TinkerbellWoman
over a year ago

your head


"Are they signed off by a doctor or self certificated?

I've known people physically collapse from stress, however it's caused"

Stress can cause all kinds of physical symptoms, it's quite scary the effect it can have.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

How can you say if its genuine or not though? "

If they do it a lot then I'd question if it was genuine

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

Well the people who im referring to and more than ones in my work at least are the ones who go off with stress for 6 months till half pay then come back use all their annual leave then when the probation has ended go back off which stress

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over

All companies with well developed HR policies have measures and procedures to suppory their stuff but also to challenge appropriately and that would normally involve an extermal assessment for long term stress issues.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Well the people who im referring to and more than ones in my work at least are the ones who go off with stress for 6 months till half pay then come back use all their annual leave then when the probation has ended go back off which stress"

If your company's HR policy is similar to the ones I've worked in it won't have gone unnoticed and they will be being monitored and offered help to deal with their problem, possibly advised that the job isn't for them. There are cases where other staff members are the cause of the stress and that needs addressing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me. "

Some of us make ourselves really, really sick by thinking of the extra work it causes others, to the point they're carted off to A&E. It's not helpful. If someone is too sick to work, then they're too sick. After 7 days, they need a medical professional to agree and unless we are said medical professional, we don't know.

This from someone who was off for 8wks in early 2023, 2.5 of them in hospital. When I was able to, I started replying to the WhatsApps asking me where things were and what to do about X etc. I was acutely aware of the burden on my colleagues, which further compounded my feelings of despair.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

If someone wants down time there is a reason behind it, usually overwork, something that’s should be a choice, not forced

Wether you personally agree with their reasoning is moot

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ove2pleaseseukMan
over a year ago

Hastings


"Im just curious (and it will divide opinion)

How many people think its OK to go on the sick with stress people they are annoyed at their managers?

Im in NO WAY taking a knock at people who truly go off sick with stress.

More so people who get told off/disagree with their boss and then go off ok the sick with it?"

Stress effects everyone diferant so I would never judge. When I was a manager the best way is to work with people off with stress not lable them. Let them do what they can when they can be as flexible as possible. Reduce hours and work load if needed.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Absolutely fine to take a break, due to psychological as well as physical ailments

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imisugarWoman
over a year ago

Rugby


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

How can you say if its genuine or not though? "

This. It's horrible when people speculate why you are off or make out you are a lesser person because they would cope with the stress just fine. I've heard some nasty things in the work place because of sick leave about so many colleagues.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ove2pleaseseukMan
over a year ago

Hastings


"Well the people who im referring to and more than ones in my work at least are the ones who go off with stress for 6 months till half pay then come back use all their annual leave then when the probation has ended go back off which stress"

So what line of work are you in.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"Well the people who im referring to and more than ones in my work at least are the ones who go off with stress for 6 months till half pay then come back use all their annual leave then when the probation has ended go back off which stress"

Maybe they're really stressed?

Have you tried to find out what's causing their stress and help them?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

Im not a manger lol just a colleague.

Again i want to make it clear im not against people taking time off for stress if they need it then they need it no argument here.

Just find in my job (hgv driver) in my depot if ever there is the slightest disagreement with the manager here or someone doesn't get something their own way they go on the sick with stress.

Again some im sure are genuine but im also think some are just thinking f u to the manger

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndycoinsMan
over a year ago

Whaley Bridge,Nr Buxton,


"Im not a manger lol just a colleague.

Again i want to make it clear im not against people taking time off for stress if they need it then they need it no argument here.

Just find in my job (hgv driver) in my depot if ever there is the slightest disagreement with the manager here or someone doesn't get something their own way they go on the sick with stress.

Again some im sure are genuine but im also think some are just thinking f u to the manger "

You will know the difference between the genuine and the piss taker when you see it.I've seen three friends with genuine work pressure stress that has crossed the line,the leadswingers stand out a mile.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I've worked with people who have genuinely played the system. One took the six months off with stress, came back for long enough to qualify again then went sick again. The entire time they were working another job.

After lockdown when doctors were still doing phone consultations someone I know convinced a gp that they couldn't work due to stress, was signed off for a month and prescribed anti depressants (which they didn't take because they didn't need them). They did it because there was work coming up that they didn't enjoy.

It happens and unfortunately throws doubt on the genuine people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Sure it's ok

Stress can cause either stroke/heartattck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndycoinsMan
over a year ago

Whaley Bridge,Nr Buxton,


"Sure it's ok

Stress can cause either stroke/heartattck"

Or suicide.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Sure it's ok

Stress can cause either stroke/heartattck

Or suicide."

Even murder

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hristopherd999Man
over a year ago

Brentwood


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

How can you say if its genuine or not though? "

That's the problem

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Tbh I wouldn't let it bother me, I get that long term sick impacts the business, but that's what HR is for

The majority of the fake ones use it to procure/test another employment, so the end result will be them leaving their employment anyway

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

How can you say if its genuine or not though?

That's the problem"

I think it's best left to management and HR to decide if it's genuine or not. I wasn't paid enough to worry about it. If it caused extra work and I was able to fit it into my schedule I did it, if not I didn't and explained why. One thing I learned early in my career was that quietly knocking yourself out trying to meet unrealistic targets e.g. doing the work of two people was what leads to stress. It also leads managers to believe it's achievable.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ritishguyMan
over a year ago

chatburn

You're very much mistaken by your comments. Of course you can go off with stress from work, but if your stress caused from work you will not get paid for it. Stress from home life, sure but not stress from work.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"You're very much mistaken by your comments. Of course you can go off with stress from work, but if your stress caused from work you will not get paid for it. Stress from home life, sure but not stress from work. "

Do you mean me?

I have known people who have been signed off with work related stress and been paid.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading


"For people who just don't want to cone into work, they need to think about the extra work/pressure it puts on their colleagues.

For those who are genuinely stressed, absolutely no problem. I've been one of those when my boss was harassing me.

Totally agree if genuine then no problem.

How can you say if its genuine or not though?

That's the problem

I think it's best left to management and HR to decide if it's genuine or not. I wasn't paid enough to worry about it. If it caused extra work and I was able to fit it into my schedule I did it, if not I didn't and explained why. One thing I learned early in my career was that quietly knocking yourself out trying to meet unrealistic targets e.g. doing the work of two people was what leads to stress. It also leads managers to believe it's achievable. "

That is such good advice. Everyone should take it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading


"You're very much mistaken by your comments. Of course you can go off with stress from work, but if your stress caused from work you will not get paid for it. Stress from home life, sure but not stress from work. "

That's just incorrect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *octor ProdMan
over a year ago

working Overseas

Two sides to this discussion:

1. People who are genuinely suffering from stress,who need time away from work to recover and on their return need to change roles to stop them experiencing it again

2. People who use the "stress" excuse because they are unable to the job they are paid for and have their performance questioned. These take time off and on return expect to have the same role, but with reduced duties for the same pay. These are the people who have stigmatised work place stress and who make life harder for those who have to work along side them.

I have worked with both types and fully support the genuine ones, but having worked with a manager who went off with "stress" a month into a big project, who then spent the 6 months they were off on various holidays and came back on the last 2 weeks to get the praise. I won't have the 2nd type on my teams

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

I really like this last post. Feel like that's someone in my work.

They went off work with stress TODAY actually. The job they do is about 1/2 of what everyone else does so they really couldn't have their role reduced when they come back lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes


"Im just curious (and it will divide opinion)

How many people think its OK to go on the sick with stress people they are annoyed at their managers?

Im in NO WAY taking a knock at people who truly go off sick with stress.

More so people who get told off/disagree with their boss and then go off ok the sick with it?"

For myself it's unacceptable never take time off my work

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

Best bit now is one of said person who is on the sick is constantly texting me for info about work and sending me jokey messages.... starting to doubt the sincerity of his 'sickness'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"Im just curious (and it will divide opinion)

How many people think its OK to go on the sick with stress people they are annoyed at their managers?

Im in NO WAY taking a knock at people who truly go off sick with stress.

More so people who get told off/disagree with their boss and then go off ok the sick with it?"

If I understand the question. If youre struggling enotionally, that can be as much an illness as anything more visible. I think people need to take care of their emotional well being much better than we currently do.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *obilebottomMan
over a year ago

All over

You had lots of good replies OP. Not sure what your personal issue is really. If people suffer stress or whatever, they need help as many said and the right approach tobr recovery. If you are not the right petson for that you are also not the one to judge them imo.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Best bit now is one of said person who is on the sick is constantly texting me for info about work and sending me jokey messages.... starting to doubt the sincerity of his 'sickness'"

Why?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

In my profession stress and mental health is taken very seriously. If you have stuff going on in your head you don't come to work, end of. Sickness is paid for by the company and they also can provide professional assistance. Because if your mind is not on the job you're potentially endangering lives of 100s. So it is a serious matter.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *octor ProdMan
over a year ago

working Overseas


"In my profession stress and mental health is taken very seriously. If you have stuff going on in your head you don't come to work, end of. Sickness is paid for by the company and they also can provide professional assistance. Because if your mind is not on the job you're potentially endangering lives of 100s. So it is a serious matter."

Totally agree. However, there are an increasing number of people in the workplace using "stress" for time off and on their return to work having restrictions put on theor duties by frankly useless HR teams. It is these people who are the problem

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff

Again I don't have issues with people going on the sick with stress. Known many people who have needed to.

As per the last post I have more issue with those who just use it as an excuse to get time off because I think its insulting for those who do genuinely need time off for stress

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"Again I don't have issues with people going on the sick with stress. Known many people who have needed to.

As per the last post I have more issue with those who just use it as an excuse to get time off because I think its insulting for those who do genuinely need time off for stress"

You're going to stress yourself thinking about this.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Again I don't have issues with people going on the sick with stress. Known many people who have needed to.

As per the last post I have more issue with those who just use it as an excuse to get time off because I think its insulting for those who do genuinely need time off for stress"

Some people do fake it. I know of one.

Sending jokey messages and wanting to know about work doesn't mean they are though. I do think you can get a feeling for who's genuine though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *illan-KillashMan
over a year ago

London/Sussex/Surrey/Berks/Hants


"Im just curious (and it will divide opinion)

How many people think its OK to go on the sick with stress people they are annoyed at their managers?

Im in NO WAY taking a knock at people who truly go off sick with stress.

More so people who get told off/disagree with their boss and then go off ok the sick with it?"

As an outsider looking in, one of the biggest challenges to recognising stress is actually recognising stress.

If I turn up for work with an arm in a sling or my leg in a cast everyone can see there's an injury.

Mental health isn't so clear, unless you know what to look for and have an interest in seeing it.

Anyone who thinks stress is trivial, or something you can "just get over" by "pulling yourself together" has never been around a sufferer and definitely not when they're at their lowest point.

Even today I hear people I work with trivialising or joking about mental health.

Sometimes it's like being in the dark ages.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Depression/ stress is the new bad back.

The mr

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff


"Depression/ stress is the new bad back.

The mr "

Lol got one of those in my work too.

Though he is a guy who refuses help so I think he really has hurt his lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I had six months straight off work with a bad back.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *vd061987 OP   Man
over a year ago

cardiff


"I had six months straight off work with a bad back.

"

I knew someone who was off for a year with it. Needed an op but waiting times

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"Depression/ stress is the new bad back.

The mr "

I've been off work with both.

Probably because, as the woman in the relationship I was expected to do everything, and there's only so much one body can do.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I had six months straight off work with a bad back.

I knew someone who was off for a year with it. Needed an op but waiting times"

Yep I needed a titanium implant in my spine. I was able to return to work before the surgery by using a tens machine while I was there.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top