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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" Much food for thought,and rightly so. Get the mind juices flowing. | |||
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"I’m mostly authentic. I water down the language though but actually that’s pretty usual. I water down my views on race . Other than that I’m pretty much all me. As annoying as I am in real life. " Oh I also water down the references | |||
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"I'm mostly exactly the same in person as I am on here ( I think ) " Ooh you are Grumpy | |||
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"It’s a bit like dating; people put their best foot forwards and try to be their best self in order to try to attract people and attention. That’s something that everyone does. I think that most people self regulate if they’re down or angry, plus not wanting a naughty step stint will force moderation. I think that it takes a level of will to portray yourself completely and as a rounded person with flaws and weaknesses on here and it can be a double edged sword. " The journey of self continues. We only should be in a battle with oneself,to be better than yesterday. All day on here,and life in reality we are pulled down. Have to keep getting up. | |||
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"I don't have to hide any flaws, hid foe long enough and that shot is painful." I totally understand this and I'm similar | |||
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"It’s a bit like dating; people put their best foot forwards and try to be their best self in order to try to attract people and attention. That’s something that everyone does. I think that most people self regulate if they’re down or angry, plus not wanting a naughty step stint will force moderation. I think that it takes a level of will to portray yourself completely and as a rounded person with flaws and weaknesses on here and it can be a double edged sword. " I get that you want to portray yourself in your best light. But it sometimes comes across as some people are perfect which simply isn't realistic. Nobody is perfect. Does it minimise how people view their insecurities as they shouldn't feel envy etc which are normal feelings? | |||
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"I have a habit of oversharing sometimes as weirdly this feels like an anonymous space to do that sometimes. I have many flaws, I'm a sensitive wee soul and over my too many years here, I've never hidden them. I understand why some people do though. " Is it oversharing or is it just you saying it as it is? Some could accuse me of oversharing but I actually don't know what it actually means. Don't we all share our life experiences if they are relevant to the conversation? | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind" That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. | |||
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"It’s a bit like dating; people put their best foot forwards and try to be their best self in order to try to attract people and attention. That’s something that everyone does. I think that most people self regulate if they’re down or angry, plus not wanting a naughty step stint will force moderation. I think that it takes a level of will to portray yourself completely and as a rounded person with flaws and weaknesses on here and it can be a double edged sword. I get that you want to portray yourself in your best light. But it sometimes comes across as some people are perfect which simply isn't realistic. Nobody is perfect. Does it minimise how people view their insecurities as they shouldn't feel envy etc which are normal feelings? " In short; yes it definitely does. People give the ‘correct’ answers on here, as opposed to their actual feelings and that can make others feel wrong for not being like that. Envy, jealousy, feeling low or sad are all natural feelings and don’t need to be cured or pushed away. Talking about them and understanding them is the important part | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. " I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" Oh there is only one like me Swimming in my own sea Like or it or not I don't give a twot no pretence here . | |||
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"It’s a bit like dating; people put their best foot forwards and try to be their best self in order to try to attract people and attention. That’s something that everyone does. I think that most people self regulate if they’re down or angry, plus not wanting a naughty step stint will force moderation. I think that it takes a level of will to portray yourself completely and as a rounded person with flaws and weaknesses on here and it can be a double edged sword. I get that you want to portray yourself in your best light. But it sometimes comes across as some people are perfect which simply isn't realistic. Nobody is perfect. Does it minimise how people view their insecurities as they shouldn't feel envy etc which are normal feelings? In short; yes it definitely does. People give the ‘correct’ answers on here, as opposed to their actual feelings and that can make others feel wrong for not being like that. Envy, jealousy, feeling low or sad are all natural feelings and don’t need to be cured or pushed away. Talking about them and understanding them is the important part " Totally agree with you about talking and understanding emotions is an important part of becoming a happy individual. | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true" This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening | |||
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"I'm mostly exactly the same in person as I am on here ( I think ) Ooh you are Grumpy " Aww ta chuck | |||
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"If say I'm pretty honest about myself and my flaws on here. Photos are very much a snapshot of a more perfected moment. I like to think my profile text balances it out with. In reality people will take what they want from comments or messages and form their own opinions based on the tone they think I'm using which can be misconstrued " That's a good point that regardless of what you post others may misconstrue what you mean | |||
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"Not really, I'm quite open about being a grumpy sometimes anxiety ridden bitch who's always tired. It's no different to what I say to someone face to face. As for other things IE jealousy, I'm genuinely not a jealous person especially not with anyone from here, I'm not saying the green eyed monster hasn't made an appearance in my relationship before but we have great communication and accept its just part of life and how much we love eachother. Its not something that's ever got in the way of anything just means we have a conversation about why one of us feels that way. " I've seen your post and your openness about it. Makes me feel a bit more human | |||
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"I'd like to think that what I am here, is just the same as what you'd get if you met me. What's not seen though is the plethora of thoughts and things I want to say. Not traits that I'm hiding but self doubt holding me back and that's just the same in the real world. Coming across quiet and subdued with the occasional little gem. " I get that insecurities can hold people back. And Nicecouple made a good point that it's more difficult for males to open up about feelings on here. | |||
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"I think most of us present how we want to be, rather than how we actually are. I don't think it's always intentional, although it can be. For example: my posts are generally more thought through than my mouth would be That's to do with the medium, with seeing it written down I think. Mrs TMN x " I can't type as fast as my brain thinks | |||
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"I am myself on here for the most part. If I'm in a bad mood I do tend avoid the conflict that goes on here at times ,because I couldn't be arsed having a row . Of course I'm envious of others from time to time,nobody can say they were never jealous whether it be on here or in day to day life. I know my flaws and if they show they show Em x " And I think that's how people genuinely are. We don't need to highlight our emotions but neither do we need to hide them if they show | |||
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"I also think it goes back to the competition aspect - what are you here for? If it's principally sex, I reckon you're more likely to present yourself with that aim in mind, especially if you're a straight man. If you're on the forums more for friendship/chatting shit/venting, you may present yourself differently. Again, I don't think it's always an entirely conscious decision. " The competition thread along with others recently inspired this thread. I guess you're right now you portray yourself varies depending on your goal. | |||
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"I'm just me here and real life! Not everyone's cuppa for sure! Been told so! But hey ho! This is me x" I get that vibe from you. You cond across as someone totally comfortable in their own skin. It's joyful to see | |||
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"I'm a fake, I confess." | |||
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"I don't really have anything to hide - it's just typing with randoms on the internet after all." This is a very good point | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles." Great stuff can you fix a bike I’ve got ? Or is that a lie ? | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles." Now those are skills | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles." I have neither a cock nor a bike..... so just the lies for me please... prob mixed with a bit of shite | |||
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"I don't really have anything to hide - it's just typing with randoms on the internet after all." I'm not a random. | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening " I think it ties in with authenticity. Loads of people will say that men should be able to open up more, express their feelings, we need to be aware of a mental health crisis among young men etc but very few step in when a guy has expressed albeit poorly, his distress at certain issues in his life and is being flamed. But I'm an old cynic | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles. I have neither a cock nor a bike..... so just the lies for me please... prob mixed with a bit of shite" Here we go again. | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles. Great stuff can you fix a bike I’ve got ? Or is that a lie ? " It's a lie. I'm honestly full of it. | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles. Great stuff can you fix a bike I’ve got ? Or is that a lie ? It's a lie. I'm honestly full of it. " That’s a lie that | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles. I have neither a cock nor a bike..... so just the lies for me please... prob mixed with a bit of shite Here we go again. " Wher've we been ? Where are we going ? | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening I think it ties in with authenticity. Loads of people will say that men should be able to open up more, express their feelings, we need to be aware of a mental health crisis among young men etc but very few step in when a guy has expressed albeit poorly, his distress at certain issues in his life and is being flamed. But I'm an old cynic " A fact amongst us in our time. Still a massive stigma to it all. Takes years to pull down the walls that have been built to control society and de masculine men. | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening I think it ties in with authenticity. Loads of people will say that men should be able to open up more, express their feelings, we need to be aware of a mental health crisis among young men etc but very few step in when a guy has expressed albeit poorly, his distress at certain issues in his life and is being flamed. But I'm an old cynic A fact amongst us in our time. Still a massive stigma to it all. Takes years to pull down the walls that have been built to control society and de masculine men. " What?? | |||
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"I'm not an authentic person. I am full of shit and lie seven times out of ten because I am not perfect even though I like to pretend I am perfect but I am very good at giving blowjobs and fixing broken bicycles. Great stuff can you fix a bike I’ve got ? Or is that a lie ? It's a lie. I'm honestly full of it. " All teeth I bet. | |||
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"What I type is what you get, I'm honest I don't care less if people like me or not if I disagree I'll say it, if I agree I'll say it, if I think someone is a prick I'll say that too. What's rh point in pretending to be something you're not, it's just setting unrealistic expectations to others that you will never be able to keep up in person. I'll continue being my awkward self. Mrs " Awkward self this resonates with me a lot. I'm rather socially awkward and I think that shows on here a lot. Are people hiding themselves for gain on here all the time though or do they do it without realising. Or maybe to hide their past traumas, I certainly used to do the later a lot when I was younger. | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening I think it ties in with authenticity. Loads of people will say that men should be able to open up more, express their feelings, we need to be aware of a mental health crisis among young men etc but very few step in when a guy has expressed albeit poorly, his distress at certain issues in his life and is being flamed. But I'm an old cynic " But now you've highlighted it to me it's totally accurate. There is a vibe of saying the right thing not then not following it up. | |||
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"Unfortunately you get what you see " I may not agree with all your points but totally appreciate that you're open about them. | |||
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"I already come across as a negative bitch I think, best not be any more authentic! " Careful there's a mod on the thread. But yeah I get you I can be an argumentative moo on here sometimes, within the rules of course | |||
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"I don't hide, I choose not to reveal certain aspects of myself. This is in effect a room full of strangers. I'm not about to reveal the innermost workings of my mind That's fair enough and I appreciate that. But I also notice you don't say I'm never envious of others etc. I think there's a bit of a difference between not sharing information and portraying you don't have negative feelings or emotions. I agree. I think people feel that presenting yourself as human might work against you. Especially if you're a man. It's sad but true This is interesting and something I hadn't connected the dots with. But I do think I have an easier time about expressing my emotions here versus a male. Which is disheartening I think it ties in with authenticity. Loads of people will say that men should be able to open up more, express their feelings, we need to be aware of a mental health crisis among young men etc but very few step in when a guy has expressed albeit poorly, his distress at certain issues in his life and is being flamed. But I'm an old cynic " Wait.. You mean people will bullshit the #bekind shit until it no longer suits them. Often those who choose to chant it the loudest are the first to dismiss it when it doesn't fit their view. | |||
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"I already come across as a negative bitch I think, best not be any more authentic! Careful there's a mod on the thread. But yeah I get you I can be an argumentative moo on here sometimes, within the rules of course " If I'm getting het up, I log out, but I've never felt Fab deals very well with women who speak their minds. | |||
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"WYSIWYG with me " I'll have to admit I had to look that that up | |||
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"And that other one is hiding it very well. Thank you." Haha. Fab is like the local pub. Where we all go to get away from real life for a bit. | |||
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"And that other one is hiding it very well. Thank you." | |||
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"WYSIWYG with me I'll have to admit I had to look that that up " I’ve always used it. I’m not sure where I heard it but I love it | |||
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"And that other one is hiding it very well. Thank you. Haha. Fab is like the local pub. Where we all go to get away from real life for a bit. " What kind of pub do you go to? My local is always full of drama | |||
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"Virtue signalled responses are all too common on here and have been for a very long time. Folk are scared to say what they actually think in case of potentially jeopardising a potential meet. I prefer the people who say it as it is. These are my people. People who are true to themselves. People who don’t blow smoke up the arses of complete strangers on the internet in a thinly veiled attempt for their acceptance. Be yourself. Be you " I do and I always end up getting fucked - it's great. | |||
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"What I type is what you get, I'm honest I don't care less if people like me or not if I disagree I'll say it, if I agree I'll say it, if I think someone is a prick I'll say that too. What's rh point in pretending to be something you're not, it's just setting unrealistic expectations to others that you will never be able to keep up in person. I'll continue being my awkward self. Mrs Awkward self this resonates with me a lot. I'm rather socially awkward and I think that shows on here a lot. Are people hiding themselves for gain on here all the time though or do they do it without realising. Or maybe to hide their past traumas, I certainly used to do the later a lot when I was younger. " Yeah I'm socially awkward too but there's no point hiding it all always be honest I'd rather people didn't like me because they genuinely don't like me & that's fine rather than like me for something I'm not. Mrs | |||
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"WYSIWYG with me " Does this mean Forrest Gump wrong in saying "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get." | |||
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"Nope I'm pretty transparent about what I want you all to know about me, and that matches with what people see when they meet me " | |||
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"Virtue signalled responses are all too common on here and have been for a very long time. Folk are scared to say what they actually think in case of potentially jeopardising a potential meet. I prefer the people who say it as it is. These are my people. People who are true to themselves. People who don’t blow smoke up the arses of complete strangers on the internet in a thinly veiled attempt for their acceptance. Be yourself. Be you " I hold back , sadly Rex. I am sharper than I make out but gradually prohibited myself from being authentic because of the whining masses that garner popularity by building up a thinly veiled appeal for sympathy behind a totally fabricated wall of supposed slight and hurt ....... fuck them. That kind of feeble mindedness and total lack of character is taking over society, social media FAB n all. | |||
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"Virtue signalled responses are all too common on here and have been for a very long time. Folk are scared to say what they actually think in case of potentially jeopardising a potential meet. I prefer the people who say it as it is. These are my people. People who are true to themselves. People who don’t blow smoke up the arses of complete strangers on the internet in a thinly veiled attempt for their acceptance. Be yourself. Be you I hold back , sadly Rex. I am sharper than I make out but gradually prohibited myself from being authentic because of the whining masses that garner popularity by building up a thinly veiled appeal for sympathy behind a totally fabricated wall of supposed slight and hurt ....... fuck them. That kind of feeble mindedness and total lack of character is taking over society, social media FAB n all. " Amen to Granny | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" Swinging without acknowledging emotions is to forget that we are humen. | |||
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"And that other one is hiding it very well. Thank you. Haha. Fab is like the local pub. Where we all go to get away from real life for a bit. What kind of pub do you go to? My local is always full of drama " We all wear pyjamas in mine. | |||
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"Virtue signalled responses are all too common on here and have been for a very long time. Folk are scared to say what they actually think in case of potentially jeopardising a potential meet. I prefer the people who say it as it is. These are my people. People who are true to themselves. People who don’t blow smoke up the arses of complete strangers on the internet in a thinly veiled attempt for their acceptance. Be yourself. Be you I hold back , sadly Rex. I am sharper than I make out but gradually prohibited myself from being authentic because of the whining masses that garner popularity by building up a thinly veiled appeal for sympathy behind a totally fabricated wall of supposed slight and hurt ....... fuck them. That kind of feeble mindedness and total lack of character is taking over society, social media FAB n all. " Do you mean we're becoming a more homogeneous as people? | |||
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"WYSIWYG with me Does this mean Forrest Gump wrong in saying "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get." " Go Forrest! | |||
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"I think that I've got all my flaws and problems on view to everyone here. I post at times when I'm sad, when I feel damaged, when I'm low, just as much as when I'm happy (in fact got to be more when I'm low as it's not that often that I'm the other way). I'm a flawed human being, and apart from a slight error in the age on my profile, everything I write is just me. [In my defence on age, I do have pretty good genes age wise, and I think that most people meeting me for the first time would guess me to be even younger than what my profile says. And I don't use any beauty filters on my pics, what you see there is what you get. And if you ask me privately what my age and actual birthday are, you'll get a truthful answer, but I'll be disappointed if you don't then send me a card and prezzie on the day ] I guess that I just don't see the point of lying or boasting, or even of trying to show myself in a better light than I deserve. Maybe means that I'm not knee deep in fanny every night, but that would probably get a bit tiring after a while anyway..." Polly I love it when you have shared you journey. Your honesty has really helped educate me on something I have little experience of. So thank you. But I'm not sure you are supposed to put your knee in fannies. | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent" Oh yes. | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent due to our inability to honestly express ourselves entirely for the fear of upsetting others or political correctness or other reasons. It seems the norm. nowadays to act like this which we know is wrong and yet we do it. Some of us more than others due to gain popularity, laws, etc. Claim culture we live in doesn't help. We can but try to be the genuine article (real deal). Not easy when faced with risk of persecution. Hell, I dress up to look like a woman and it works but I'm under no illusion of who I am and can play in either mode and never ever out to deceive anyone of who I really am. I'm me, with all my faults (& I have many) you either like me or you don't - it really doesn't matter to me or should it to you." I think I would call that kindness or empathy tbh. I think radical honesty is utter bullshit and just an excuse to be an arsehole. Sure tell me that I have my dress tucked into my knickers but I would rather you didn't tell me that I'm ugly. | |||
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"Fuck I'm far from perfect. But I would argue that authenticity doesn't exist. We all adopt personalities to fit the situation we are in. They are authentic for that situation. Pickle was talking about code switching the other day and that's part of it. Swearing is a typical example. Here and in a lot of my life I swear a lot. I don't at work. That's not being inauthentic that's just being appropriate. Now I have some faults that I wouldn't admit to on a site in which I'm trying to attract people. So sure you could call that disingenuous." Goffman’s presentation of self comes to mind. #SociologyNerdBrain | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent due to our inability to honestly express ourselves entirely for the fear of upsetting others or political correctness or other reasons. It seems the norm. nowadays to act like this which we know is wrong and yet we do it. Some of us more than others due to gain popularity, laws, etc. Claim culture we live in doesn't help. We can but try to be the genuine article (real deal). Not easy when faced with risk of persecution. Hell, I dress up to look like a woman and it works but I'm under no illusion of who I am and can play in either mode and never ever out to deceive anyone of who I really am. I'm me, with all my faults (& I have many) you either like me or you don't - it really doesn't matter to me or should it to you. I think I would call that kindness or empathy tbh. I think radical honesty is utter bullshit and just an excuse to be an arsehole. Sure tell me that I have my dress tucked into my knickers but I would rather you didn't tell me that I'm ugly. " | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent due to our inability to honestly express ourselves entirely for the fear of upsetting others or political correctness or other reasons. It seems the norm. nowadays to act like this which we know is wrong and yet we do it. Some of us more than others due to gain popularity, laws, etc. Claim culture we live in doesn't help. We can but try to be the genuine article (real deal). Not easy when faced with risk of persecution. Hell, I dress up to look like a woman and it works but I'm under no illusion of who I am and can play in either mode and never ever out to deceive anyone of who I really am. I'm me, with all my faults (& I have many) you either like me or you don't - it really doesn't matter to me or should it to you." I agree that everyone is a hypocrite. I mean I know who I strive to be, but I fail constantly to be that person. But I'm working on it constantly and am a work in progress. Is there a difference between the person you want to be to the person you are in reality. Or are they versions of the same thing? And kind of a normal human thing to do? | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" I genuinely post how i feel my profile doesn't reflect how i am but I'm genuine oh and a like minded professional | |||
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"Fuck I'm far from perfect. But I would argue that authenticity doesn't exist. We all adopt personalities to fit the situation we are in. They are authentic for that situation. Pickle was talking about code switching the other day and that's part of it. Swearing is a typical example. Here and in a lot of my life I swear a lot. I don't at work. That's not being inauthentic that's just being appropriate. Now I have some faults that I wouldn't admit to on a site in which I'm trying to attract people. So sure you could call that disingenuous. Goffman’s presentation of self comes to mind. #SociologyNerdBrain " It’s not a long book. Worth it! But here’s the famous Stephen Fry to explain it: https://youtu.be/6Z0XS-QLDWM | |||
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"Fuck I'm far from perfect. But I would argue that authenticity doesn't exist. We all adopt personalities to fit the situation we are in. They are authentic for that situation. Pickle was talking about code switching the other day and that's part of it. Swearing is a typical example. Here and in a lot of my life I swear a lot. I don't at work. That's not being inauthentic that's just being appropriate. Now I have some faults that I wouldn't admit to on a site in which I'm trying to attract people. So sure you could call that disingenuous. Goffman’s presentation of self comes to mind. #SociologyNerdBrain It’s not a long book. Worth it! But here’s the famous Stephen Fry to explain it: https://youtu.be/6Z0XS-QLDWM" Thank you, I'll add it to my podcast list I working through | |||
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"Fuck I'm far from perfect. But I would argue that authenticity doesn't exist. We all adopt personalities to fit the situation we are in. They are authentic for that situation. Pickle was talking about code switching the other day and that's part of it. Swearing is a typical example. Here and in a lot of my life I swear a lot. I don't at work. That's not being inauthentic that's just being appropriate. Now I have some faults that I wouldn't admit to on a site in which I'm trying to attract people. So sure you could call that disingenuous. Goffman’s presentation of self comes to mind. #SociologyNerdBrain It’s not a long book. Worth it! But here’s the famous Stephen Fry to explain it: https://youtu.be/6Z0XS-QLDWM Thank you, I'll add it to my podcast list I working through " You’ll be disappointed when you get to this one and it’s only 2 minutes long | |||
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"Fuck I'm far from perfect. But I would argue that authenticity doesn't exist. We all adopt personalities to fit the situation we are in. They are authentic for that situation. Pickle was talking about code switching the other day and that's part of it. Swearing is a typical example. Here and in a lot of my life I swear a lot. I don't at work. That's not being inauthentic that's just being appropriate. Now I have some faults that I wouldn't admit to on a site in which I'm trying to attract people. So sure you could call that disingenuous. Goffman’s presentation of self comes to mind. #SociologyNerdBrain It’s not a long book. Worth it! But here’s the famous Stephen Fry to explain it: https://youtu.be/6Z0XS-QLDWM Thank you, I'll add it to my podcast list I working through You’ll be disappointed when you get to this one and it’s only 2 minutes long " Lol I just added to my list, 2 minutes though may need to find a longer explanation | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" I think my posts over the last few weeks have been pretty honest and shown I've plenty of flaws. No point in only ever posting when things are going great and it's been beneficial to recieve support from virtual strangers online at times. I've never seen the forums as just being for happy, innocuous, random timewasting threads. They can, and do provide so much more. A | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent due to our inability to honestly express ourselves entirely for the fear of upsetting others or political correctness or other reasons. It seems the norm. nowadays to act like this which we know is wrong and yet we do it. Some of us more than others due to gain popularity, laws, etc. Claim culture we live in doesn't help. We can but try to be the genuine article (real deal). Not easy when faced with risk of persecution. Hell, I dress up to look like a woman and it works but I'm under no illusion of who I am and can play in either mode and never ever out to deceive anyone of who I really am. I'm me, with all my faults (& I have many) you either like me or you don't - it really doesn't matter to me or should it to you. I agree that everyone is a hypocrite. I mean I know who I strive to be, but I fail constantly to be that person. But I'm working on it constantly and am a work in progress. Is there a difference between the person you want to be to the person you are in reality. Or are they versions of the same thing? And kind of a normal human thing to do? " I'm by no means an expert but I believe we are all to a certain extent the same, we are human beings, we rely on the same air we breathe to live, we all have a soul, we are all special in our own way. My advise would be to simply continue being you, do what makes you feel happy, be kind to others and to yourself. Don't look to be like others in order to please them, etc. You are divine, we all are. It's just that sometimes other forces come into play (ego, etc.) and we don't always make the right choices in life; for sure we never stop to learn. Enjoy life doing what makes you happy. Kindness is the best trait to have, but it doesn't mean to say we let others walk all over us. | |||
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"In truth, I believe we're "ALL" a bunch of hipocrytes to a certain extent due to our inability to honestly express ourselves entirely for the fear of upsetting others or political correctness or other reasons. It seems the norm. nowadays to act like this which we know is wrong and yet we do it. Some of us more than others due to gain popularity, laws, etc. Claim culture we live in doesn't help. We can but try to be the genuine article (real deal). Not easy when faced with risk of persecution. Hell, I dress up to look like a woman and it works but I'm under no illusion of who I am and can play in either mode and never ever out to deceive anyone of who I really am. I'm me, with all my faults (& I have many) you either like me or you don't - it really doesn't matter to me or should it to you. I agree that everyone is a hypocrite. I mean I know who I strive to be, but I fail constantly to be that person. But I'm working on it constantly and am a work in progress. Is there a difference between the person you want to be to the person you are in reality. Or are they versions of the same thing? And kind of a normal human thing to do? I'm by no means an expert but I believe we are all to a certain extent the same, we are human beings, we rely on the same air we breathe to live, we all have a soul, we are all special in our own way. My advise would be to simply continue being you, do what makes you feel happy, be kind to others and to yourself. Don't look to be like others in order to please them, etc. You are divine, we all are. It's just that sometimes other forces come into play (ego, etc.) and we don't always make the right choices in life; for sure we never stop to learn. Enjoy life doing what makes you happy. Kindness is the best trait to have, but it doesn't mean to say we let others walk all over us." This is good advice | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. " you’re the only one who sees it | |||
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"… Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. " you are not. | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you’re the only one who sees it" Thanks for letting me know. | |||
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"… Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you are not. " Now I’m confused….. | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. " This is only a small example of forum behaviour. I've seen lots of it as well as people who present a very different face and attitude in private to the public forum one. The unfortunate thing is that far too many people are drawn in by the nice pics and lovely forum personas and completely miss the chaos being created in the background. | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. " Hypocritical behaviour abounds here! | |||
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"I'm me on here, within the rules. I do self-censor sometimes but otherwise, what you read is me. " Although I don’t always agree with you, you are never disrespectful or rude. | |||
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"I'm autistic and have to spend a lot of everyday life pretending not to be for the comfort of others. It's relentlessly exhausting. I'm on Fab to relax and have fun, and so I mostly don't mask here. A lot of people don't seem to like that (based on the angry replies I get in my inbox!), but I don't see that as a problem. I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and I'm fine with that - I'm not going to spend my leisure time pretending to be anything/anyone other than me. " I get the exhaustion of masking and wanting rest bite from it on here. | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you’re the only one who sees it Thanks for letting me know." I was just seeing if I could tell you. That’s all | |||
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"The subbing in this thread is so funny " You're talking about football now right? | |||
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"I think that I've got all my flaws and problems on view to everyone here. I post at times when I'm sad, when I feel damaged, when I'm low, just as much as when I'm happy (in fact got to be more when I'm low as it's not that often that I'm the other way). I'm a flawed human being, and apart from a slight error in the age on my profile, everything I write is just me. [In my defence on age, I do have pretty good genes age wise, and I think that most people meeting me for the first time would guess me to be even younger than what my profile says. And I don't use any beauty filters on my pics, what you see there is what you get. And if you ask me privately what my age and actual birthday are, you'll get a truthful answer, but I'll be disappointed if you don't then send me a card and prezzie on the day ] I guess that I just don't see the point of lying or boasting, or even of trying to show myself in a better light than I deserve. Maybe means that I'm not knee deep in fanny every night, but that would probably get a bit tiring after a while anyway... Polly I love it when you have shared you journey. Your honesty has really helped educate me on something I have little experience of. So thank you. But I'm not sure you are supposed to put your knee in fannies." Possibly a slightly inappropriate simile. Face deep in clunge? Drowning in lady cum? No, I think more my style would be "cosy cuddling with bountiful bosom buddies". | |||
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"The subbing in this thread is so funny You're talking about football now right? " No he’s not. | |||
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"The subbing in this thread is so funny You're talking about football now right? No he’s not. " I'm getting too old for new fandangled meanings for words grr. | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you’re the only one who sees it Thanks for letting me know. I was just seeing if I could tell you. That’s all" How did it go? | |||
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"The subbing in this thread is so funny You're talking about football now right? " The proper football though, not the stuff that’s on the telly now | |||
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"The subbing in this thread is so funny You're talking about football now right? No he’s not. " My remora | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you’re the only one who sees it Thanks for letting me know. I was just seeing if I could tell you. That’s all How did it go?" There was a knock at the door after but I didn’t answer | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" Good post op. I think many folks (not all) type what they think is going to get them what they want.. Whether that is true to self or not. Bit judgy i know as nobody really knows what others are thinking | |||
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"I see a lot of non authentic behaviour on these forums, usually by people telling others to be kind and respectful but in the next thread they’re berating posters, body shaming and the like. Of course this is not all forum users, but you can’t tell me that I’m the only one who sees it. you’re the only one who sees it Thanks for letting me know. I was just seeing if I could tell you. That’s all How did it go? There was a knock at the door after but I didn’t answer " Crashed and burned…. | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe?" It doesn't matter tbh , if am interested in a thread or post l give my tuppence worth , l did get banned by admin for asking a question on a couples forum post ..the question..why ? ..didn't think l'd get banned for asking that ..but l did.. | |||
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"I'm me on here, within the rules. I do self-censor sometimes but otherwise, what you read is me. Although I don’t always agree with you, you are never disrespectful or rude. " Thanks for that, feels like a compliment, even if we do disagree on some things. Ta | |||
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"I think I have spilled out the whole range of my flaws in my time here. I am quite possibly a little more dirty minded than I show on here. But, I have to keep something back to flood the messages or face to face meetings with. It's hard to be truly authentic in the flatness of a forum . I would hope there is more to all of us than what we could show here. " I would imagine there is much more to people than they are willing to type out on the forum, which is totally understandable. Think what I was trying to get at that some not all present a maybe idealised version of themselves. Which I don't think is a particularly healthy environment for others and can't make themselves feel good when those standards slip. Because nobody is perfect and that's ok I think | |||
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"Some of the threads on here recently have got me thinking. Do you normally hide your personality flaws on here? I mean if I look at some threads on here (only some mind) we live in a perfect utopia where people aren't jealous or envious of others. Are we really this perfect? Or are we typing out what we'd ideally like to be? How authentic are you in your postings on here? Or do you only post when you're in a good place maybe? It doesn't matter tbh , if am interested in a thread or post l give my tuppence worth , l did get banned by admin for asking a question on a couples forum post ..the question..why ? ..didn't think l'd get banned for asking that ..but l did.. " I'm sure you know it's against site rules to discuss bans and the reasons behind them. It will lead to a follow up ban. | |||
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