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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

igniting your farts hurts. Don't do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There must be easier ways to get rid of clagnuts....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was a teenager and bunking off school a group of us went back to my house. One of the guys lit a fart and singed my mums carpet

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

was he sitting or standing ?

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By *am123Man
over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls...... "
thats so grimm how does lighting a fart impress a girl damm i was doing it all wrong growing up .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls...... thats so grimm how does lighting a fart impress a girl damm i was doing it all wrong growing up . "

Dunno,,, but oddly enough, the guy did alright for himself…

He moved to the east midlands to become an airline steward,,, (a straight one at that),,, and ended up living as a lone man in a house full of females stewardesses ….. seemed rather happy about life last time we spoke …..

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By *am123Man
over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls...... thats so grimm how does lighting a fart impress a girl damm i was doing it all wrong growing up .

Dunno,,, but oddly enough, the guy did alright for himself…

He moved to the east midlands to become an airline steward,,, (a straight one at that),,, and ended up living as a lone man in a house full of females stewardesses ….. seemed rather happy about life last time we spoke ….. "

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By *ady4ladyWoman
over a year ago

liverpool

oh no, another impression burned onto my eyes. it hurts, it hurts.

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By *am123Man
over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"oh no, another impression burned onto my eyes. it hurts, it hurts. "
lol thats what i thought

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By *ady4ladyWoman
over a year ago

liverpool


"oh no, another impression burned onto my eyes. it hurts, it hurts. lol thats what i thought "

Sits quietly in a dark room, with cold flannel on my eyelids.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

gRanny...perhaps if u shaved that fucking massive beaver and arse hari of urs. there wouldnt be any feedback from the flame...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"igniting your farts hurts. Don't do it."

Too late.

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By *xpresMan
over a year ago

Elland

Only if your hairs catch on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls...... "

Jebus. So much wrong with this.

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By *am123Man
over a year ago

essex chelmsford


"oh no, another impression burned onto my eyes. it hurts, it hurts. lol thats what i thought

Sits quietly in a dark room, with cold flannel on my eyelids. "
lmao ur funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

Jebus. So much wrong with this."

Hey don’t shoot the messenger….

I’m only reporting the facts…..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

Jebus. So much wrong with this.

Hey don’t shoot the messenger….

I’m only reporting the facts….. "
bet that was a damp squib to his night, or did he get the girl that was into scat

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By *agna Cum LaudeMan
over a year ago

Laudable


"igniting your farts hurts. Don't do it."
Dear God..................what am I doing here!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just as well ya reminded me. Was just about to warm a sausage. No money for the gas card.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just as well ya reminded me. Was just about to warm a sausage. No money for the gas card. "

That's made me chuckle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

Jebus. So much wrong with this.

Hey don’t shoot the messenger….

I’m only reporting the facts….. bet that was a damp squib to his night, or did he get the girl that was into scat "

Give the guy his due,,,, he laughed it off and spent the rest of the evening displaying the damp patch on the back of his jeans where he’d sponged off in the loos with a wetted down bar towel….

With no shame at all….

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

Jebus. So much wrong with this.

Hey don’t shoot the messenger….

I’m only reporting the facts….. bet that was a damp squib to his night, or did he get the girl that was into scat

Give the guy his due,,,, he laughed it off and spent the rest of the evening displaying the damp patch on the back of his jeans where he’d sponged off in the loos with a wetted down bar towel….

With no shame at all…. "

Did he fold or scrunch it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gwanny...I once saw a guy accidentally shit himself in a pub while trying to ignite his fart hoping to impress a group of girls......

Jebus. So much wrong with this.

Hey don’t shoot the messenger….

I’m only reporting the facts….. bet that was a damp squib to his night, or did he get the girl that was into scat

Give the guy his due,,,, he laughed it off and spent the rest of the evening displaying the damp patch on the back of his jeans where he’d sponged off in the loos with a wetted down bar towel….

With no shame at all….

Did he fold or scrunch it? "

I think he used a straddled polishing action ….

Like pulling the bar towel back and forth legs-akimbo....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Didn't Jasper Carrot do a sketch about this????

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