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Accident with my remote control. I slipped

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By *anforkinkywomen OP   Man
over a year ago

Barwell

I just got out the shower and went down stairs. I slipped and fell back on my sofa. Unfortunately my TV remote was wedged between my two sofa cushions pointing upwards.

How do I get it out?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it for a Smart TV?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A strong sneeze should do it….

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

Try the dyson

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use a Lynx can to scoop it out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or an empty spam can

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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago

for a penny

If you can still change channels, I’d leave it at least until Monday. Then, if it hasn’t moved, I’m afraid it’s a trip to A&E. Tell them you were trying to do yourself with it: they would never believe the truth and would only give you a hard time. This way they might be lenient.

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

What ever you do I would do it quickly - if the licence fee van comes round then they charge you double if you can’t show them a working remote.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Press the red button

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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago

for a penny


"What ever you do I would do it quickly - if the licence fee van comes round then they charge you double if you can’t show them a working remote."

I hadn’t thought of that.

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

Chopsticks

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

Let's hope the batteries don't leak acid......

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?"

He must have an above average arsehole

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?"

His bumhole is very very slack

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your watching TOTP get it out when it’s finished

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?

His bumhole is very very slack "

And you know this because...?

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?

His bumhole is very very slack

And you know this because...?"

I’ve seen it

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By *anforkinkywomen OP   Man
over a year ago

Barwell


"Try the dyson"

Wouldn't that cause an implosion?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?

His bumhole is very very slack

And you know this because...?"

Most sphincters would be slamming shut in such circumstances. It doesn't seem an unreasonable guess.

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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago

for a penny


"Try the dyson

Wouldn't that cause an implosion?"

It might find new channels for him.

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By *uckMan
over a year ago

Scunthorpe DN15

Was it programmed to tune in to your favourite channel?

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By *olden PoleMan
over a year ago

London


"How firm is your couch to maintain the upright when the average arsehole isn't nearly ready to accommodate something that wide with no buildup?"

Interesting point

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By *he Kat 666Woman
over a year ago

Salisbury

Hurry up and cough before the bloody news comes on, ffs!!!

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

Sounds essentially similar in credibility to those classic Hoover Dustette excuses.

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