FabSwingers.com forum: Second chance to a time waster?

By *ingdang OP TV/TS
over a year ago

manchester

A year ago, I arranged a meet with this guy. I trusted him, did my make up, too, a shower ect. When the arranged time came, he didn’t show up, but sent me a message with some excuses. I would expect a message before the time so I don’t waste time preparing for it.

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Move on.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

No, not if the message first time around wasn't in advance, people know before the time of the meet if they can or can't make it.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give him a chance!!!!!

*I want to see something like this work out in a good way for both parties for once!

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

God no. Move on, you're worth more than someone who won't own their previous actions and doesn't value your time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A year ago, I arranged a meet with this guy. I trusted him, did my make up, too, a shower ect. When the arranged time came, he didn’t show up, but sent me a message with some excuses. I would expect a message before the time so I don’t waste time preparing for it.

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

If he had been in touch to arrange a meet again after a couple of weeks, yes. After a year, no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hell no.

(Unless he's really hot then I may give them a second chance)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/07/23 08:19:58]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This also happened to me very recently OP. Stood up them quite sone time later a message with excuses. I didn’t even open the message I just deleted it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op do not do it your worth more than that they had they chance they blow it

I understand ever one’s has stuff going on and stuff

But cancel a first meet and you never get another

If we meet before and you cancel without at lest 24 hours notice you never get another

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?

If he had been in touch to arrange a meet again after a couple of weeks, yes. After a year, no.

This..

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

It’s obvious you didn’t believe his excuses at the time, so you’ll probably not believe the new set when he lets you down again.

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

A year ago and now he’s back?

Hell no.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

You called him a timewaster; I don't think it bodes well.

Do you like him Op? Believe he won't? Think you'd have a brilliant time?

Then yes.

If you're wavering, not sure if he's telling the truth, don't do it. You don't need to be overthinking something that should be easy and straightforward.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

It sounds like he's been plucking courage up for some time and has eventually hit send. You should definitely paint the town red with him. It sounds like one of those leaps of faith but just reassure him and tell him how much you've missed him!

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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich

Go with your gut instinct

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

100% move on! Trust your gut!

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By *ent in BlackMan
over a year ago

Silsden

If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. Kick him to the kerb.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is where the block button should have been used for its intended purpose last year.

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

I wouldn’t even acknowledge him. Don’t give him the satisfaction of being blocked. Just pretend he doesn’t exist.

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

Ignore and move on especially since he dodged the question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've given second chances before and low and behold it's blown up in my face again and they are asking for a third chance. My mantra now is - never prioritise anyone that threats me as an option.

If they really wanted me then they would have met me.

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Got to follow gut instinct

There can be occasions when benefit of doubt should be given...

But 3 strikes and you're out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

No, definitely not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Block him and move on.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

No forgiveness?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

No definitely not. Especially as he dodged the question.

I've had someone ghost me for a week when they agreed to aiming for this weekend for a date. I kept the weekend for them. There will be no second chance. Why bother with someone who can't even communicate?

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"
give him another chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember the saying fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me

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By *eliciousDiva69Woman
over a year ago

Schitts Creek

Know your worth OP! If someone cancelled ahead of time and I felt the reasons were plausible, I might consider a second chance but at the time you are supposed to be meeting them - absolutely not!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No second chances! Waste my time once and that's you finished.

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By *oitering-With-intentMan
over a year ago

city of Lodon

Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Ignore him and move on

There's not many reasons someone can't let you know they're not meeting well in advance

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. "

Is that a challenge

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

Fuck what anyone else says, if you wanna give him a second chance then go for it.....

We've all had second chances in our lives, which people very conveniently forget....

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By *he_Libertines_69Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Why give a second chance to a timewaster when there are plenty of genuine guys who would probably love to meet and would turn up but can't get a meet.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

Think of the saying, "a leopard doesn't change its spots"

In this perspective, if the other person let you down once, it's possible they'll do it again!

If they even apologise, and make excuses etc, to me it would be a polite No Thanks then BLOCK them.

Harsh to some, but also hopefully, the other person may improve their communication on all levels.

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By *olf and RedCouple
over a year ago

Nr Cardiff or at Chams Darlaston

If he didn’t answer why he wasted your time before, I wouldn’t give him the time of day again.

Red

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

Meet him. Bonk him. Jettison him.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Move on. Plenty more fish in the sea

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

99% of the time I block people that don't turn up at pre arranged meetings, Especially if I've spent a lot of time getting ready and they give me a lame excuse at the last minute.

He might have just got nervous and jibbed out but if you do agree to meet him, try and get a plan B, ie arrange a meeting an hour and a half later with someone else so you're not totally wasting your time.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

I'm always willing to give someone a second chance, depending on the reason they cancelled before.

You say he didn't show up but messaged an excuse - if the excuse came after the no show, and he's now dodging the question, bin him off.

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By *ostindreamsMan
over a year ago

London

I would give a second chance if the vibe is good and he truly repents the mistake. But him dodging the question works against his favour.

Also, as he was the one who let you down in the first meet, this meet should be in a place closer to you than him.

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By *ezebel100Woman
over a year ago

Birmingham

No, he's dodged accounting for his previous behaviour so no second chances.

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By *vlizTV/TS
over a year ago

merseyside and anglesey

Nahh move on, I've had this done to me and again he came up with a lame excuse,

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis

1000% no.

From personal experience, on more than one occasion I've accepted an excuse/apology & agreed to arrange another meet, only to be let down again.

Now, if someone is a no-show or gives me a last minute excuse for cancelling, I simply tell them that I won't ever arrange to see them again, wish them all the best & block.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Hell no, there's plenty more people who will show up on here

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

"Hell no, there's plenty more people who will show up on here

Comtessa, do we all not deserve a second chance at times...

Good to see you last btw

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

He will repeat the behaviour. I had a similar situation.

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By *havedwareMan
over a year ago

Ware

'Time waster' and 'second chance ' don't belong in the same sentence.

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Delete, block and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Delete, block and move on."

It's funny how ruthless I am giving the advice, but I only managed two out of three myself.

Oddly, I really need help going full fuck you mode.

Thank god for friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do second chances...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

Not if he dodged the question or at least at the time apologised and gave you a proper explanation

We're all adults so we know that things do come up and things happen, it's all about how you communicate about such things

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

No never any second chances x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Second chance ??

..not a hope ...if a person makes a fool out of you once shame on them ...if they make a fool out of you twice shame on you..

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By *hatsWhatCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Are you prepared for the disappointment you will feel if they don’t show .

Plus the amount of “I told you so’s” if us lot get wind of it.

Always your choice, but have fun either way

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis

"Hell no, there's plenty more people who will show up on here

Exactly! You have to seperate the wheat from the chaff!!

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By *aptain VMan
over a year ago

Birstall, Leicester

anyway, this man approached me again yesterday asking for a second chance. I politely mentioned his behavior the first time, and he dodged question.

Would you give him another chance, or just ignore him and move on?"

No chance

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

No, never.

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

No! Crack on with someone else dear their is plenty more cock in thd world.

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

"A year ago and now he’s back?

Hell no."
Jog on after a year! Hahaha

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis

"No! Crack on with someone else dear their is plenty more cock in thd world.

Amen!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stick to clubs, much less of this bullshit to worry about

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

"No! Crack on with someone else dear their is plenty more cock in thd world.

Amen!!

"
*The world rather lol true though

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By *issToniLeicsTV/TS
over a year ago

Leicester

No I wouldn't meet with him if he's had his chance to meet and let you down.

But don't block him just put a note on his profile (TW) then he can see what he's missing out on and never going to get x

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