FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Cock measuring device

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So Mav is a bit of an inventor and has decided to make an official fab cock measuring machine.

Using a cross between the Clarkes foot measuring device and the blood pressure thingy the Dr's uses it will give you length, girth, mass and density.

He is also petitioning fab for an official 'pink tick' to be added to measured fab members and a filter people can use to find their desired cock length/girth/firmness.

He's fucking weird right? But what would you invent and why? Would it be for the benefit of the masses or just to make your life easier?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That'd see most of the 8 inch plus gang rapidly vanish.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

I'm still working on a teleportation machine.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability? "

Finger

Cucumber

2l bottle

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability? "

A set of those Russian dolls.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rincess-PeachWoman
over a year ago

irrelevant


"That'd see most of the 8 inch plus gang rapidly vanish."

This made me laugh a lot

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London | Belfast


"That'd see most of the 8 inch plus gang rapidly vanish."

To be fair women have no idea how big cocks are unless extreme on the spectrum. One things 4 inches are 6, the other thinks 8 inches are 5, some are spot on etc.

Heck, I once hooked up with the same woman twice but two years apart, and both times she guessed different sizes, which doesn#t really matter, but I found it interesting.

Honestly, if you're not tiny or huge, it doesn't matter. She will make herself believe you're the perfect size, if the sex is good enough

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That'd see most of the 8 inch plus gang rapidly vanish."

It's not a gang, it's just three guys in a corner

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

I can just envisage it now:

You both get to the bedroom, start kissing. She reaches down and caresses your cock.

Then goes down on her knees, unbuttons your trousers, pulls them down, then the underwear.

.

.

.

The next thing you know is there's a strange contraption strapped around your cock.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like a normal Wednesday night then, ChunkyGent..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

You can calculate your Adjusted Penis Size with the following formula:

((L*D)+(W/G))/(A^2)

Length times Diameter plus Weight over Girth divided by Angle of the tip squared

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Sounds like a normal Wednesday night then, ChunkyGent.. "

Just not so tight next time, hey.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilverfox for youMan
over a year ago

Hull

Apparently it’s the first 3to 4inch inside a woman that is the most sensitive anyway !!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That'd see most of the 8 inch plus gang rapidly vanish.

This made me laugh a lot "

Made me laugh too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability? "

I measure my cock by counting teeth it…..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London | Belfast


"You can calculate your Adjusted Penis Size with the following formula:

((L*D)+(W/G))/(A^2)

Length times Diameter plus Weight over Girth divided by Angle of the tip squared"

I understood that reference!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *apnDomMan
over a year ago

London | Belfast


"I can just envisage it now:

You both get to the bedroom, start kissing. She reaches down and caresses your cock.

Then goes down on her knees, unbuttons your trousers, pulls them down, then the underwear.

.

.

.

The next thing you know is there's a strange contraption strapped around your cock. "

Sounds like a cock cage?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nobyMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

I’ve already invented it! It’s invisibility machine. It works really well on Fab. It’s otherwise known as my profile.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nobyMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability?

A set of those Russian dolls. "

Haha!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hinstrapMan
over a year ago

Barnsley

I thought a standard lynx can was the measuring device of choice?.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I've got one to check the pH levels and moisture

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ear in the chairMan
over a year ago

yeah there


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability?

A set of those Russian dolls.

Haha!"

Not an echo meter then?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So Mav is a bit of an inventor and has decided to make an official fab cock measuring machine.

Using a cross between the Clarkes foot measuring device and the blood pressure thingy the Dr's uses it will give you length, girth, mass and density.

He is also petitioning fab for an official 'pink tick' to be added to measured fab members and a filter people can use to find their desired cock length/girth/firmness.

He's fucking weird right? But what would you invent and why? Would it be for the benefit of the masses or just to make your life easier? "

Cracking idea that!

I’d invent a sleep button for people so you can just press it and be instantly asleep

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Nowhere

Ive invented a 10 inch long ( any longer is just greed!!) which features a control Panel for initial measurement and coincidentally also controls my sky box!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"So Mav is a bit of an inventor and has decided to make an official fab cock measuring machine.

Using a cross between the Clarkes foot measuring device and the blood pressure thingy the Dr's uses it will give you length, girth, mass and density.

He is also petitioning fab for an official 'pink tick' to be added to measured fab members and a filter people can use to find their desired cock length/girth/firmness.

He's fucking weird right? But what would you invent and why? Would it be for the benefit of the masses or just to make your life easier? "
I'd invent an i love myself monitor for all those that love themselves it could range from ooooo you're sexy to omg you blew my socks off

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mandajane01TV/TS
over a year ago

Ballymena


"I'm still working on a teleportation machine.

"

Been there, done that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Apparently it’s the first 3to 4inch inside a woman that is the most sensitive anyway !!!"

I beg to to differ!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability? "

Easy we just try all the cocks to see which one fits best.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornyguyMan
over a year ago

Hillsborough, NI


"You can calculate your Adjusted Penis Size with the following formula:

((L*D)+(W/G))/(A^2)

Length times Diameter plus Weight over Girth divided by Angle of the tip squared

I understood that reference! "

South Park, yeah?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Surely we then need an answering vagina measuring device? Just to check compatability?

Easy we just try all the cocks to see which one fits best. "

Mine should fit nicely.

(Just saying).

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *rs-Naughty_Mr-CuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Nr coleford

Lynx average size

Lynn xl slightly bigger

Sky remote bigger again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top