FabSwingers.com forum: FWB dilemma

By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she's into swinging I dare say she'll have access to the fora and you've outed yourself publicly, so, good luck brother

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By *onlywishiMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Maybe talk to her and have a break ? As it can be quite hurtful if things either get too personal or it’s an instant split ?

Big step to go from being together to playing together as a couple ?

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

She just goes to clubs , not online

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

You getting too close or your Mrs?

Separate issues entirely.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

If you can't handle her meeting others ,then yes probably be best to stop meeting her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd speak to her vs asking any of us

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

Think your right ..!

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation

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By *appy HoHolly DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

From my own experience there’s very much likely potential of you two being not so compatible you must have thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation"

Thing is... Their situation will not necessarily be your situation. Because it's about how both you and your fwb view it? It doesn't really matter how anyone else has dealt with it as they're not the pair of you

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs "

When I see this statement made on a profile or in a forum comment its always a massive red flag for me.

Especially if someone is looking for couples.

It shows a fundamental lack of understanding of couples and women on Fab and in the scene as well as coming across as disrespectful. As if being on a swingers site is all about filling a gap and getting access to sex as a means to an end rather than anything else.

Also shows a controlling aspect of not allowing someone to do something they may want to.

Just a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah what a site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

If you're referring to her as your 'Mrs' I'd suggest that you're already past that point

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation

Exactly this.

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

Why would you allow a fwb to be non monogomous, but not a partner?

Is it a case of double standards, or jealousy?

Too late for whom?

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

"I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation

I agree, though with a small factor of advice on the situation is helpful. It won't predict the outcome but experience of being in said situation goes a long way regardless.

Advice based on past experience is great, so long as it is taken as advice and not as a solution.

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

It is already too late.

Her claws began to descend long ago and now form the bars of a cage from which you can never escape.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

"It is already too late.

Her claws began to descend long ago and now form the bars of a cage from which you can never escape.

Is that why so many women have claws instead of nails now? Makes sense!

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

The reason im on here is a simple one , for sex!

Being a widow for two years now , this site seemed an uncomplicated one

Obviously not one from people who judge

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs

When I see this statement made on a profile or in a forum comment its always a massive red flag for me.

Especially if someone is looking for couples.

Also shows a controlling aspect of not allowing someone to do something they may want to.

Just a thought.

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

Fear of loss !

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late?

Why would you allow a fwb to be non monogomous, but not a partner?

Is it a case of double standards, or jealousy?

Too late for whom?"

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

You fear losing her, so you want to dump her first?

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I'd say she's your fwb and not your Mrs and she likes swinging so if you don't want to get hurt by her having sex with someone else you should probably stop seeing her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my opinion, you either need to go from a FWB situation to asking her to commit to you. Whole point of FWB is it's casual.

Be prepared to be knocked back though, she might be happy with her current situation and it's completely her choice to not be exclusive.

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By *lexanderSupertrampMan
over a year ago

Gourock

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

I'd probably just talk to her about it

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

"She just goes to clubs , not online"

If she goes to clubs she knows about fab like you (who goes or doesn't). It's a bit poor you have demands on what she does, when she's essentially a free agent and not your Mrs just a fb (if I'm reading it right).

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
over a year ago

Markfield

Think of you with pipe and slippers

Think of her in bed

Laying there just watching telly

Then think of me instead

I'll never grow so old and flabby

That could never be

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And your love light shines like cardboard

But your work shoes are glistening

She's a PhD in "I told you so"

You've a knighthood in "I'm not listening"

She'll grab your sweaty bollocks

Then slowly raise her knee

Don't marry her, f*ck me

When the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay

And you know that you can't have it anyway

You gotta wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me

Those lovely Sunday mornings

With breakfast brought in bed

Those blackbirds look like knitting needles

Trying to peck your head

Those birds will peck your soul out

And throw away the key

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the kitchen's always tidy

And the bathroom's always clean

She's a diploma in "just hiding things"

You've a first in "low esteem"

When your socks smell of angels

But your life smells of Brie

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay

And you realize you can't make it anyway

You have to wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay

And you realize you can't make it anyway

You have to wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me

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By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

"I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation"

Yes I’ve been in that situation, they wanted exclusivity from me who’s poly, they wanted what they could make me into, not who I am

We do not speak anymore, they’re now alone and I’m not being controlled by anyone, a horrible feeling I gladly ran from

If you’re not a swinger, don’t date swingers

It’s never ok to try to change people to suit your own needs

Move on and let them free, if it was meant to be they’ll come back of their own accord

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"I'd say she's your fwb and not your Mrs and she likes swinging so if you don't want to get hurt by her having sex with someone else you should probably stop seeing her"

This pretty much sums it up, especially if you knew she was into swinging before you became FWB. Expecting her to change now would be unfair, but you need to chat to her about whether you both want an exclusive relationship...

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
over a year ago

Markfield

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

Just out of interest, the little devil in me has asked if, when you do acquire a “mrs” is it your intention to remain faithful to her whilst she remains monogamous? Not calling you out, it’s a genuine question x

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Have a chat with her about monogamy and feelings first, then you both can make a valid decision

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late? "

Who has the FWB? You or her?

Do you still fuck your wife?

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I love wearing your wife’s ring OP

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

"What would you advise , if you think your getting close to a FWB

Id never have another man have sex with my mrs, But as she is into swinging

Shall i finish it before its too late?

Who has the FWB? You or her?

Do you still fuck your wife?"

She’s dead through the first wave of covid

So no i dont

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow it all got a bit deep on here

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

"I was wondering if anyone may of been in same situation

Yes I’ve been in that situation, they wanted exclusivity from me who’s poly, they wanted what they could make me into, not who I am

We do not speak anymore, they’re now alone and I’m not being controlled by anyone, a horrible feeling I gladly ran from

If you’re not a swinger, don’t date swingers

It’s never ok to try to change people to suit your own needs

Move on and let them free, if it was meant to be they’ll come back of their own accord "

Thanks

Probably best bit of advise on here

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

"You fear losing her, so you want to dump her first?

Yeah , while feelings are not strong

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By *iya2311 OP Man
over a year ago

maidstone

Dumped

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

"Dumped"
you dumped her?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I just make sure I’ve got this right. You’ve a fwb and you’re getting feelings for her. You don’t wanna be in a relationship with her because she’s into swinging and you don’t want her to be?

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

"Can I just make sure I’ve got this right. You’ve a fwb and you’re getting feelings for her. You don’t wanna be in a relationship with her because she’s into swinging and you don’t want her to be? "

Yes. He doesn't want his bird at home to swing

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

...

I'd advise finding potential partners somewhere other than swinging clubs and swinging websites in future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dumped"

She binned you off then...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. He doesn't want his bird at home to swing"

Right. Is he still allowed to swing or will he hang up his swinging pants too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why wouldn't you let your mrs have sex with someone else if she wants to, given that you already are? isnt that double standards?

As for your fwb sounds like its turning more into an affair than anything else, will you reach a point where you dont want her to be sleeping with anyone else while you try finding another fwb to fuck?

sounds like an ongoing cycle to me that you need to break in some way!

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By *onlywishiMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

When I enjoyed a fwb situation it was solely to enjoy each other’s company and explore sexually what ever each other wanted to try ? This meant we enjoyed being together as well as other couples and both single guys and girls ?

This was great for us both but as feelings started to come into it the time came to stop as that wasn’t what it was about ! Don’t regret a second have some amazing memories and hope she still has them too

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

She’s dead through the first wave of covid

Seems soon to me to be calling a random shag your Mrs

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By *ohndom2023Man
over a year ago

Hastings/Greenwich

"Think of you with pipe and slippers

Think of her in bed

Laying there just watching telly

Then think of me instead

I'll never grow so old and flabby

That could never be

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And your love light shines like cardboard

But your work shoes are glistening

She's a PhD in "I told you so"

You've a knighthood in "I'm not listening"

She'll grab your sweaty bollocks

Then slowly raise her knee

Don't marry her, f*ck me

When the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco Bay

And you know that you can't have it anyway

You gotta wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me

Those lovely Sunday mornings

With breakfast brought in bed

Those blackbirds look like knitting needles

Trying to peck your head

Those birds will peck your soul out

And throw away the key

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the kitchen's always tidy

And the bathroom's always clean

She's a diploma in "just hiding things"

You've a first in "low esteem"

When your socks smell of angels

But your life smells of Brie

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay

And you realize you can't make it anyway

You have to wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me

And the Sunday sun shines down on San Francisco bay

And you realize you can't make it anyway

You have to wash the car

Take the kiddies to the park

Don't marry her, f*ck me"

Love the beautiful south

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