FabSwingers.com forum: Cycling Cattle Grid Chaos

By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

For hundreds of years we have seen cows grazing in open spaces in Cambridgeshire. Tradition meant that Cattle grids were used to keep them safely on their green grassy havens. Then well meaning but idiotic councillors installed cycle friendly cattle grids at a huge cost so that cyclists no longer needed to dismount to cross the grid. Guess what. They were no longer cattle grids and the cows swiftly legged it and escaped. Are cyclists to blame here. What is going on here guys. It's all over the news

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the cyclists fault the cows got away. They should round them up and keep them in a shed. Let the cows be free.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How are normal cattle grids not cyclist friendly? You just ride over them.

What are these cyclists doing? Trying to over them sideways?

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By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

It sounds like the council cocked up.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

"How are normal cattle grids not cyclist friendly? You just ride over them.

What are these cyclists doing? Trying to over them sideways?"
Health and Safety gone mad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought the whole reason to cycle was so you could swap the seat for a dildo and ride over cattle grids?

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"I thought the whole reason to cycle was so you could swap the seat for a dildo and ride over cattle grids?"

Two nun were cycling through the old part of the city. One said 'I've never came this way before' The other replied 'it's the cobblestones'

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

Dismount ,walk across the cattle grid with your bike ,remount and ride away ,simples

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Riding over normal cattle grids isn't difficult, as long as you slow down and go in a straight line. The only problem I've ever had is the cows standing in front of the grids and not letting me through.

Cal

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By *929Man
over a year ago

newcastle

Should be put back the way they were immediately. Cunts

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

It doesn't look *very* chaotic

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-65925909.amp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's simple to just ride over a normal cattle grid. Don't see the issue. Bet the farmers happy!

Council seriously lack common sense.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Puy the old cattle grids back to stop rampaging herds of cows from wandering the high street, taking up all the seats in Costa and to stop them forming organised protests outside Maccies.

Then put small ramps each side of the grids for cyclists to use to jump over the grids, Eddie Kidd style.

They'll just have to pedal a little faster.

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"It doesn't look *very* chaotic

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-65925909.amp"

C'mon this is life trough a tabloid headline. They squeezed a lot into this story. Old and ancient ways upended, the uselessness of local government and all for the benefit of bloody cyclists.

mooo!

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Were the cattle on bicycles? Is that how they got across?

Council clearly at fault. Level cattle grids don't really pose a problem to cyclist although they can be a bit dodgy when wet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tom’s stirring shit against cyclists is what’s going on here.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

We have the wiggle traverse across numerous cattle grids across the forest, without the need for any cycle safety amendments. Council are clearly at fault...

NB. Cows rolling across cattle grids, to reach tasty delights are a pain

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Why can these buggers just get off their bikes for a cattle grid

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Cattle grids are a bugger to cross in a wheelchair. Unless there's a pedestrian gate at the side that's wide enough, not a style or kissing gate, then fine, but if there are obstacles at the side, then the cattle grid is also probably a step too far (pun intended).

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

The cows literally crossed the cattle grid because of making them cycle friendly...

What's going on here guys ?

It's all over the news

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a cyclist... Road and mountain biker. Cyclists are an absolute pain.

They ride on the roads and complain that a car is there. Ride side by side when cars are behind. Wear cameras for "gotcha" moments. It never stops.

Combining cyclists whining with health and safety cultist councillors... The cows escape.

Rant over

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

You’ve got beef with cyclists?

How dairy they!

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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago

Chelmsford

These cyclists think they have a divine right.. they need to obey the rules of the road

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By *ustme34Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Why cant cyclists just ride over cattle grids like cars and motorbikes do . Why would they have to dismount. Why do they cause so much drama. And why do they have to take up so muvh room on roads . Its like they get a cycle . Automaticaly Have to wear lycra and become an ass

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By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

"The cows literally crossed the cattle grid because of making them cycle friendly...

What's going on here guys ?

It's all over the news"

I'm surprised noone has said "It's all over the moos".

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By *ust a little bit moreWoman
over a year ago

kendal

Tbf cyclists are to blame for everything

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"Why cant cyclists just ride over cattle grids like cars and motorbikes do . Why would they have to dismount. Why do they cause so much drama. And why do they have to take up so muvh room on roads . Its like they get a cycle . Automaticaly Have to wear lycra and become an ass

Because there's a particular technique to crossing them, you don't want to get it wrong though.

As to your other points. lol lolol

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By *lay 4 your plessureMan
over a year ago

Wigan

Just out of curiosity, if all cycling got banned, what group of people would everyone turn their irrational hatred to next?

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"Just out of curiosity, if all cycling got banned, what group of people would everyone turn their irrational hatred to next? "

Everyone hates cyclists?

They'll hate whoever they're told to hate. Trans people maybe teachers. Environmental activists are in with a good chance too

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By *lay 4 your plessureMan
over a year ago

Wigan

"Just out of curiosity, if all cycling got banned, what group of people would everyone turn their irrational hatred to next?

Everyone hates cyclists?

They'll hate whoever they're told to hate. Trans people maybe teachers. Environmental activists are in with a good chance too "

Sorry, everyone wasn't the best word for me to use there, I meant all those on the anti cyclist bandwagon.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Just out of curiosity, if all cycling got banned, what group of people would everyone turn their irrational hatred to next?

Everyone hates cyclists?

They'll hate whoever they're told to hate. Trans people maybe teachers. Environmental activists are in with a good chance too

Sorry, everyone wasn't the best word for me to use there, I meant all those on the anti cyclist bandwagon.

Is the bandwagon cattle-grid proof?

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By *lay 4 your plessureMan
over a year ago

Wigan

"Just out of curiosity, if all cycling got banned, what group of people would everyone turn their irrational hatred to next?

Everyone hates cyclists?

They'll hate whoever they're told to hate. Trans people maybe teachers. Environmental activists are in with a good chance too

Sorry, everyone wasn't the best word for me to use there, I meant all those on the anti cyclist bandwagon.

Is the bandwagon cattle-grid proof?"

Yes, I believe they are, rather ironically though, the horses that pull them are not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cycled all my life. Don't wear lycra or helmet. Polite to motorists even when they're aggressive and always pedal over cattle grids.

Oh, and I save the NHS money by being so healthy. I'm one less car on the road too.

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