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I have a dilema.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema?

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By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago

London


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Just look at the penis in depth and get to know it's soul

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By *t0600Man
over a year ago

elvedon


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Maybe try not getting to know them as much and just get freaky

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Get freaky with women instead.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema?

Maybe try not getting to know them as much and just get freaky "

If only it were that easy!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Get freaky with women instead."

Oh well yeah that solves everything! Never have the same issues there!

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Get to know better men

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By *orthcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle

Erm, what's 'the ick'?,.....

Asking for an older friend obviously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you’re getting to know them, then something is putting you off maybe you just aren’t that compatible?

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Erm, what's 'the ick'?,.....

Asking for an older friend obviously

"

Haha! Just means getting turned off, you look at them and do a little mouth sick! Lol.

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton


"Get freaky with women instead."

This lol

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

stick to women work for me x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ... "

I hear you! See a lot of my attraction comes from personality etc. But then I notice something in their behaviour and it just ruins it for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you’re getting to know them, then something is putting you off maybe you just aren’t that compatible? "

Very true.

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By *orthcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Erm, what's 'the ick'?,.....

Asking for an older friend obviously

Haha! Just means getting turned off, you look at them and do a little mouth sick! Lol. "

Ahhh! New words, but old familiar feeling ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok, sounds like I need to ditch the men and hook up with the ladies instead.

Now where to find them!? Lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok, sounds like I need to ditch the men and hook up with the ladies instead.

Now where to find them!? Lol. "

you not trued me lol

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton


"Ok, sounds like I need to ditch the men and hook up with the ladies instead.

Now where to find them!? Lol. "

Hello

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilemma? "

You don't, resign yourself to be celibate for the remainder of your life... Welcome to the club.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilemma?

You don't, resign yourself to be celibate for the remainder of your life... Welcome to the club."

Luckily the ladies have agreed to help me out!

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset


"Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ...

I hear you! See a lot of my attraction comes from personality etc. But then I notice something in their behaviour and it just ruins it for me "

thats good id be the same and bye bye im very picky in the first place i wont lower my standards (if thats the right word?) im lucky 30 years on the scene and you get to know a few real decent guys one of them ive know the whole 30 years lol but its friends and i still dont know the ins and outs of his life and i dont want to

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Ha ha I saw a clip the other day, comedian saying she had changed tactics, very funny!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ha ha I saw a clip the other day, comedian saying she had changed tactics, very funny! "

Ooo, where did you see that? I obvs need to change my ways too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ...

I hear you! See a lot of my attraction comes from personality etc. But then I notice something in their behaviour and it just ruins it for me

thats good id be the same and bye bye im very picky in the first place i wont lower my standards (if thats the right word?) im lucky 30 years on the scene and you get to know a few real decent guys one of them ive know the whole 30 years lol but its friends and i still dont know the ins and outs of his life and i dont want to "

See this is where it probably goes wrong for me. Due to my day job, I am very very easy to talk to, people tell me everything about themselves, even when I don't want to know!

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

Give them a cheat sheet beforehand.

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset


"Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ...

I hear you! See a lot of my attraction comes from personality etc. But then I notice something in their behaviour and it just ruins it for me

thats good id be the same and bye bye im very picky in the first place i wont lower my standards (if thats the right word?) im lucky 30 years on the scene and you get to know a few real decent guys one of them ive know the whole 30 years lol but its friends and i still dont know the ins and outs of his life and i dont want to

See this is where it probably goes wrong for me. Due to my day job, I am very very easy to talk to, people tell me everything about themselves, even when I don't want to know! "

lol i keep my job secret not that id be in trouble as im the boss

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By *ull_circleWoman
over a year ago

Brighton

The ick is so unfortunate and can happen without warning. No advice, just sympathy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Less i know about whom i meet the better i need to know i fancy them and i need to know ill get on with them whiles we have fun ....anything else no thanks and they get the same back private life is just that swinging is for fun ...

I hear you! See a lot of my attraction comes from personality etc. But then I notice something in their behaviour and it just ruins it for me

thats good id be the same and bye bye im very picky in the first place i wont lower my standards (if thats the right word?) im lucky 30 years on the scene and you get to know a few real decent guys one of them ive know the whole 30 years lol but its friends and i still dont know the ins and outs of his life and i dont want to

See this is where it probably goes wrong for me. Due to my day job, I am very very easy to talk to, people tell me everything about themselves, even when I don't want to know!

lol i keep my job secret not that id be in trouble as im the boss "

Oh I don't tell them what I do. Think it is just so natural in me that it just happens!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ick is so unfortunate and can happen without warning. No advice, just sympathy."

Ah thanks babe. Nice to know I am not alone in this!

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

It's meh not ick for me. But I feel your pain.

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By *hunkyBuggaMan
over a year ago

Devon

Is it a certain level of ‘knowingthemness’ that gives you the ick or is it just that something about that guy ends up giving you the ick?

If it’s the former then maybe try and cut to a meet a bit earlier.

If it’s the latter you’re doing nothing wrong and if he gives you the ick you don’t want that dick! (Trademark)

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset


"Ha ha I saw a clip the other day, comedian saying she had changed tactics, very funny!

Ooo, where did you see that? I obvs need to change my ways too."

It was on FB, black woman, but she basically said the same about not jumping into bed and getting to know men first. I'll try and find it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is it a certain level of ‘knowingthemness’ that gives you the ick or is it just that something about that guy ends up giving you the ick?

If it’s the former then maybe try and cut to a meet a bit earlier.

If it’s the latter you’re doing nothing wrong and if he gives you the ick you don’t want that dick! (Trademark)"

Haha, love that!

A bit of both I guess. Sometimes I'll get to know them, get the dick and then they'll do or say something and I am like... oh no!

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

https://youtu.be/-kMER0mPLTs

Easier than I thought lol

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By *hunkyBuggaMan
over a year ago

Devon


"Is it a certain level of ‘knowingthemness’ that gives you the ick or is it just that something about that guy ends up giving you the ick?

If it’s the former then maybe try and cut to a meet a bit earlier.

If it’s the latter you’re doing nothing wrong and if he gives you the ick you don’t want that dick! (Trademark)

Haha, love that!

A bit of both I guess. Sometimes I'll get to know them, get the dick and then they'll do or say something and I am like... oh no! "

Yes you have a severe case of being normal. Just do what you feels right. If you want to jump on him early doors do it, if you want to get to know them first do that. The ick can appear at anytime without warning and don’t think you can plan for that.

Trust me as someone one who oozes ick

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke


"Get freaky with women instead."

This

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"https://youtu.be/-kMER0mPLTs

Easier than I thought lol"

Lol, I relate too much to this!!

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
over a year ago

Portstewart

Get freaky with couples then you can have some alone sessions with the lady if you both wanted and I'm sure the guy would either leave you to it or watch

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

·

How does one navigate this dilemma? "

You are sailing in the wrong sea of expectations and against unfavourable trade winds.

Follow your charts and survey your maps and you shall disembark onto a land-lubbing gentleman of your dreams.

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you think you absolutely need peen in your life? I think if you can live without it you should. I do and I’m so much happier than those that get it.

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Do you think you absolutely need peen in your life? I think if you can live without it you should. I do and I’m so much happier than those that get it. "

Down with the peen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Choose better men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you think you absolutely need peen in your life? I think if you can live without it you should. I do and I’m so much happier than those that get it.

Down with the peen. "

Solidarity

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Do you think you absolutely need peen in your life? I think if you can live without it you should. I do and I’m so much happier than those that get it.

Down with the peen.

Solidarity "

Keep your peen down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you think you absolutely need peen in your life? I think if you can live without it you should. I do and I’m so much happier than those that get it.

Down with the peen.

Solidarity

Keep your peen down. "

I will. In solidarity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely don't look at me then

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By *okoloshCouple
over a year ago

cardiff

100% go for women!!!

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By *okoloshCouple
over a year ago

cardiff


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

I know how you feel! The ick is real

Also wanted to DM about the group chat mentioned in your profile but don't fit the parameters.

I'd love to be included though

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema?

Choose better men."

Lol, thing is we don't know if they are better/decent til we get to know them. They might start off good but then.... ick!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What works for me is checking myself a little bit. We're all human and it's impossible to like every trait in someone. I usually remind myself that I'm not dating them so can bypass the small icks if they don't impact the playmate side. But if it's a big red flag then yeah just move along from that one.

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I think men are charming and women delightful. All is marvellous in this, the best of all possible worlds. Just tilt your perspective, OP, and see that appalling, perspective-altering character flaw become a refreshing idiosyncracy.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

That's what makes the one who doesn't give you the ick special

9/10 will give me the ick over something, but the special one, I hold onto for a long time, and we are on our 4 year fwb anniversary now

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Maybe only your head is Demi sexual but your body likes the opposite.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

This is exactly my problem trying to meet couples, I need to get to know the male half but when I do they generally put me off.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That's what makes the one who doesn't give you the ick special

9/10 will give me the ick over something, but the special one, I hold onto for a long time, and we are on our 4 year fwb anniversary now "

Aw that's amazing!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Maybe only your head is Demi sexual but your body likes the opposite."

Yeah, I think I am realising I am far more Demi than I thought.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema?

This is exactly my problem trying to meet couples, I need to get to know the male half but when I do they generally put me off.

Mrs "

Oh exactly this!

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

Oh crumbs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What *kind* of behaviour do you always eventually uncover in men that turns you off?

I mean for it to happen once or twice is understandable. But all the time?

What (or who? ) is the common denominator in all of this?

Maybe it’s some kind of projection on your behaviour that makes men (eventually) react in a certain way?

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

You could try meeting us and then you have a spare in the event of getting the ick with Luke.

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By *tooveMan
over a year ago

belfast


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Stop reading mumsnet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema?

Choose better men.

Lol, thing is we don't know if they are better/decent til we get to know them. They might start off good but then.... ick! "

Ahem.

I'm fucking delightful.

Even I think so.

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

·

How does one navigate this dilemma?

You are sailing in the wrong sea of expectations and against unfavourable trade winds.

Follow your charts and survey your maps and you shall disembark onto a land-lubbing gentleman of your dreams."

What my erudite friend is trying to say is, only have sex with men on P&O cruises.

(nerodot) (nerodot)

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

·

How does one navigate this dilemma?

You are sailing in the wrong sea of expectations and against unfavourable trade winds.

Follow your charts and survey your maps and you shall disembark onto a land-lubbing gentleman of your dreams.

·

What my erudite friend is trying to say is, only have sex with men on P&O cruises.

(nerodot) (nerodot)

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What *kind* of behaviour do you always eventually uncover in men that turns you off?

I mean for it to happen once or twice is understandable. But all the time?

What (or who? ) is the common denominator in all of this?

Maybe it’s some kind of projection on your behaviour that makes men (eventually) react in a certain way?

"

Lol... a man trying to tell me that I am the problem... yep, that's icked me!

Literally something different every time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take a chance on me

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry


"What *kind* of behaviour do you always eventually uncover in men that turns you off?

I mean for it to happen once or twice is understandable. But all the time?

What (or who? ) is the common denominator in all of this?

Maybe it’s some kind of projection on your behaviour that makes men (eventually) react in a certain way?

Lol... a man trying to tell me that I am the problem... yep, that's icked me!

Literally something different every time. "

I'm not saying it is but is it possible that its a you problem?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Help a girl out!

I seem to need to get to know men a little bit before getting freaky with them.... however.... as soon as I get to know men I totally get the ick!

How does one navigate this dilema? "

Don't be a swinger

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry


"Take a chance on me "

Jeez man, after that thread yesterday. Have a drink if you're thirsty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Take a chance on me

Jeez man, after that thread yesterday. Have a drink if you're thirsty."

after the thread yesterday I will not be meeting anymore

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry


"Take a chance on me

Jeez man, after that thread yesterday. Have a drink if you're thirsty.after the thread yesterday I will not be meeting anymore "

You're too young, I'm too old and the OP finds too easy to find reasons to reject men.

I think we should be just drawing names from a hat by this point.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Take a chance on me "

Listening to ABBA again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Take a chance on me

Listening to ABBA again "

Here I go again!

Or am I watching Mamma Mia!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Take a chance on me

Jeez man, after that thread yesterday. Have a drink if you're thirsty.after the thread yesterday I will not be meeting anymore

You're too young, I'm too old and the OP finds too easy to find reasons to reject men.

I think we should be just drawing names from a hat by this point. "

I’d play that game

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I also think there is a happy medium between meeting too soon and too late which is what I think may be happening. There are so many ways for messaging to go wrong. So yes I find if i message for weeks something will go wrong at some point. Better to meet them and feel their vibe. Less chance of misinterpreting tone that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What *kind* of behaviour do you always eventually uncover in men that turns you off?

I mean for it to happen once or twice is understandable. But all the time?

What (or who? ) is the common denominator in all of this?

Maybe it’s some kind of projection on your behaviour that makes men (eventually) react in a certain way?

Lol... a man trying to tell me that I am the problem... yep, that's icked me!

Literally something different every time. "

Well there you go then. Another man, another ick. Only one constant …

Yet you’re the one saying it’s the men that’s the problem. Touché

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"If you’re getting to know them, then something is putting you off maybe you just aren’t that compatible? "

This. Eleventy billion percent.

You won't know them til you get to know them and if you get to know them and don't like them - move on to someone else.

A

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