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Women: Advice for a man on how to present yourself in a dating app?

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield

I've said before I have basically zero luck on dating apps and believe it's because I'm not attractive enough, but people always say that's not the case. So what am I doing wrong? What kind of photos and bio attracts you, if it's not all about looks?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Photos of you smiling, where you look happy and as if you're having fun.

That's just what I like personally.

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By *eily2020TV/TS
over a year ago

Manchester

Nice photos of you alone not other people

A bio that's not clichés, empty or'fill in later'

Confidence is sexy

Describe a first date

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I think it’s standard for a man to be pictured holding a fish…

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Can't say what your doing wrong on dating apps as I don't use them but on here your profile is very bland. It says absolutely nothing about you or what you are looking for.

Women (most not all) love shopping. Picture your profile like a shop window...is there anything on it that would entice the ladies to want to step inside???

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"Can't say what your doing wrong on dating apps as I don't use them but on here your profile is very bland. It says absolutely nothing about you or what you are looking for.

Women (most not all) love shopping. Picture your profile like a shop window...is there anything on it that would entice the ladies to want to step inside???"

Yeh my profile on here's not very detailed as pretty much given up on ever getting anything on here. My dating app profiles are more detailed and obviously have more pictures but I still don't get any matches, which leads me to believe, despite what people on here and friends may say, that I'm just completely undesirable to the opposite sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Just be yourself which is important, trying to be something that doesn't relate to you really doesn't make sense. You're a grown man whom knows what makes you tick and interests

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates. "

How come some men do really well on them though?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates.

How come some men do really well on them though? "

Where are these men? I’ve not met them?

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline


"Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates.

How come some men do really well on them though? "

Do they? Concentrate on yourself bud. Be you, not someone else

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates.

Guy I did a TEFL course with last year. He was 38, bald and lackey, but was getting matches with 30/40 women, most of them in their early 20s and good looking

How come some men do really well on them though?

Where are these men? I’ve not met them? "

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline


"Do not base your attractiveness on dating apps.

Dating apps were designed to get money from you not give you dates.

Guy I did a TEFL course with last year. He was 38, bald and lackey, but was getting matches with 30/40 women, most of them in their early 20s and good looking

How come some men do really well on them though?

Where are these men? I’ve not met them? "

I think he was talking out of his arse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I recently had huge amounts of matches. I was on here moaning about it because whilst I was getting the matches most of them were catfish, bitcoin sellers or porn sellers.

So what if he gets matches. If he’s still on the dating app then he’s still single and it’s not doing it’s job is it.

Good well written profile, be positive. Write about you, who you are. Do not have a fish picture. Do not list all the things you hate about women.

Clear face shots and full length shots.

Have thick skin and persevere.

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline


"I recently had huge amounts of matches. I was on here moaning about it because whilst I was getting the matches most of them were catfish, bitcoin sellers or porn sellers.

So what if he gets matches. If he’s still on the dating app then he’s still single and it’s not doing it’s job is it.

Good well written profile, be positive. Write about you, who you are. Do not have a fish picture. Do not list all the things you hate about women.

Clear face shots and full length shots.

Have thick skin and persevere. "

Wise words . Be yourself fella

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"…… What kind of photos and bio attracts you, if it's not all about looks?"

It’s not about looks, it’s about attraction.

In other words, it’s not you op, it’s them.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Pics of you out and about, in a park or by a lake.

Normal pics, and smile, or look towards something in the distance with a serene smile on your face.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not about your looks perhaps what you're giving off is some sort of desperate vibe to get a match without realising it.

I think I probably was on my last dating attempts.

So I deleted my profile and focused on living my life and enjoying it for me without thinking about dating. I think that in itself actually made me more appealing

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

Well written profile that displays your character..

And some natural photos

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By *allMeBeeMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

Don't compare yourself to others; you're not them. Just present yourself as you are, some people will be interested, some won't. The ones that aren't are not for you.

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

Think D did pretty well on a dating app.. He met me!

Bluntly pics of you smiling, avoid sunglasses, a macho bio.... No

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

If you believe you’re not attractive enough, why I should I believe you are attractive enough?

There’s a lot to be said about confidence.

I wanna date someone who knows what they bring to the table and won’t accept less than what they are worth

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading


"Photos of you smiling, where you look happy and as if you're having fun.

That's just what I like personally."

This times 10. Do what we women do. Take a whole bunch of selfies and then choose the best. Try different smiles.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth


"…… What kind of photos and bio attracts you, if it's not all about looks?

It’s not about looks, it’s about attraction.

In other words, it’s not you op, it’s them. "

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By *lay 4 your plessureMan
over a year ago

Wigan

I find it's much better to put your efforts into the real world instead of the online world,thats where more of the magic happens. Get yourself out and about and actually talk to people. Maybe look for local social clubs, night school classes that interest you and see if making new friends can lead to something more. Too many people put in too much effort online hoping for instant success, but in reality it's actually putting yourself out there and letting things progress naturally that works best.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I've said before I have basically zero luck on dating apps and believe it's because I'm not attractive enough, but people always say that's not the case. So what am I doing wrong? What kind of photos and bio attracts you, if it's not all about looks?"
you don't have a bio and only one pic..... Sell yourself, your profile is your advert

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

A smile can change a view from a fuck no, to a fuck yes

I'm all about facial attraction, so not much more help than that, I'm afraid OP

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By *rlandoMan
over a year ago

Lincolnshire


"I've said before I have basically zero luck on dating apps and believe it's because I'm not attractive enough, but people always say that's not the case. So what am I doing wrong? What kind of photos and bio attracts you, if it's not all about looks?"

lots of pics with your cock in one hand and a can of carling in the other

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry


"I find it's much better to put your efforts into the real world instead of the online world,thats where more of the magic happens. Get yourself out and about and actually talk to people. Maybe look for local social clubs, night school classes that interest you and see if making new friends can lead to something more. Too many people put in too much effort online hoping for instant success, but in reality it's actually putting yourself out there and letting things progress naturally that works best. "

Honestly I think this is the best advice here. The apps can be soul destroying. Get out and talk to people, say hello please thanks & goodbye. Smile. Ask questions and practice listening. Baby Steps at first. Have you thought about some voluntary work.

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell. "

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

Have you considered a speed dating event? Personally I never thought I could really get my personality across in just a couple of photos and a bio. But when I actually got on dates I found things went so much better in real life. You just can't fully communicate without eye contact and body language. So I always figured speed dating would be a good option. However I never got round to it because I found Mrs Misfit on here instead. To be fair I've found the same to be true in swinging too. Can't beat meeting people in real life to put yourself (and their self) across properly.

Mr

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?"

Are you interested in people's answers or do you just want someone to confirm what you're thinking?

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?"

I’m on every dating app and yet to find one based purely on looks.

It sounds like the only person obsessing over looks is you.

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield

Thanks for everyone's advise. I'll try and get more natural looking photos and photos smiling more and create an interesting bio. As I say though it just seems fruitless. As a poster above said studies show if you're not attractive enough you won't get anything, that's just the harsh truth. For all the people that have said in previous threads that I'm not ugly or that dating apps aren't good for any men and not to care about results on them, I'm sorry but that's just denying reality. A lot of men do well on dating apps and they're not lying. They're just better looking. As for meeting people in real life, that's massively undermined by the fact that the people you talk to in real life will also be on dating apps and get better options there. And before anyone says you've got to love yourself before others can, that has nothing to do with results on dating apps. No one can tell from a few pictures and a bio if you love yourself or not, unless you're profile literally says I'm depressed and hate myself. It's one look at your picture and if you're not good looking enough you're not getting a match

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?

I’m on every dating app and yet to find one based purely on looks.

It sounds like the only person obsessing over looks is you. "

Tinder, hinged, bumble, feeld. All the research shows it has very little to do with what's in your profile

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?

I’m on every dating app and yet to find one based purely on looks.

It sounds like the only person obsessing over looks is you.

Tinder, hinged, bumble, feeld. All the research shows it has very little to do with what's in your profile "

So why are you on them?

If you know they don’t work, why waste your time?

I’m on all of them. Have no set type and talk to lots of different people.

As I said above, the only person who seems hung up on looks is you.

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By *osephSamuel90 OP   Man
over a year ago

Warfield


"On all the dating sites I tried over a decade (most of them) I never found the right profile or pictures. Tried lots of advice. Fact is if you're not attractive enough it's a waste of time. The OKC and Tinder research from a few years ago was spot on as far as I can tell.

See much I'd like to say it's not the case, the reality seem to be that it is. For all the talk of getting the right profile picture and having a bio that expresses yourself, ultimately research shows that people decide who to swipe on based purely on whether they find the person good looking. If I was good looking I could have the same sort of profile as I do on here, one picture and fairly generic bio, but I'd still get matches and women messaging me. So the whole just find the right picture and have a bio that shows who you are just seems like an ultimately fruitless task if you're below average looks wise. I still appreciate people's advise but just think ultimately its not going to compensate for how I look. As for the 'it's the energy you give out'thing again I'm sorry but how does that work on a dating app based purely on looks?

I’m on every dating app and yet to find one based purely on looks.

It sounds like the only person obsessing over looks is you.

Tinder, hinged, bumble, feeld. All the research shows it has very little to do with what's in your profile

So why are you on them?

If you know they don’t work, why waste your time?

I’m on all of them. Have no set type and talk to lots of different people.

As I said above, the only person who seems hung up on looks is you. "

Because people I'm not ugly, but as I say results prove otherwise, so will probably delete them all again. My profile on things like Hinge and Tinder has more pictures than on here, and has a fairly detailed bio, but I still don't get any matches, and I'm not being picky or having too higher standards. So the most likely outcome is most women don't find me attractive enough to swipe yes on

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