FabSwingers.com forum: What are you rubbish at

By *ruceyy OP Man
over a year ago

London

Sexually?

Let's mix it up from 'i can make you cum in 2 mins'

I have no patience so mix it up lots until I lose energy and care so just flip the woman over and pound until I'm done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kissing!!! I’m awful!!!!!! And I do a lot of it seeing as I’m married

I only ever kissed two of the men I’ve met, and I got the giggles each time so that kinda covered up for my failings

I need a teacher

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy."

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing. I’m awesome at the sexy sex…

Oh yes, I’m rubbish at describing how good I am.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?"

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

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By *apidaryMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Toe sucking. As appealing to me as ordering chicken feet in a Chinese restaurant (which I'm willing to accept might be delicious if you got used to them). With a toe between my lips, the overpowering feeling is not revulsion but sheer emotional disbelief that the owner of the toe could be getting any pleasure from my attentions. And somehow if you can't bring yourself to believe someone is receiving pleasure, it kills the joy in giving it. The whole thing makes me want to snort with laughter and demand to know of the owner of the toes is simply kidding me about.

A failure of imagination on my part, I am content to admit.

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By *unx2019Couple
over a year ago

Moray

Cuck rubbish at erections and not stopping at playing with himself, that's why cage him 24/7

Lxx

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By *uicy 2020Woman
over a year ago

London

Being on top. I just get into my head too much, am i doing it right, how do i look etc etc etc. I just cant relax and enjoy it. Plus my knees are about the only part of me that feels my age, so that doesnt help x

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Frigging female partners. I am totally rubbish at bringing a woman off mith my hands. My poor wife suffered years of me losing the spot, pressing too hard, not pressing hard enough, going too fast, going too slow, etc. etc.

Sigh.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x"

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

Literally, everything.

Took me a while to realise that I am the problem, before blaming someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

Role play. No, I can't pretend to be a Viking space alien. I don't do AmDram.

Truth be told, I'll probably assume I'm terrible at everything unless you tell me otherwise!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/06/23 10:21:27]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dirty talk- specifically degradation. Makes me feel uncomfortable if I actually like the person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting hard from a blowjob. It very rarely happens and I prefer they use their hand while kissing to get me hard first

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By *he love catsCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also being on top, you’ve got about 1 solid minute of pleasure until my check engine light comes on and my knees start smoking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward."

This is what makes me feel worried about meeting couples. This part specifically

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By *educing_EmCouple
over a year ago

Tipperary

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

I had always thought of it as a looks good in porn thing but thats all. Doesn't do much for me.

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward.

This is what makes me feel worried about meeting couples. This part specifically

When they stay and cuddle together and you go home alone? Me too.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Also being on top, you’ve got about 1 solid minute of pleasure until my check engine light comes on and my knees start smoking."

I can’t even begin to describe how much this post has amused me. You’re amazing Mrs Shiv. Never change.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Literally, everything."

This *really* isn’t true, Dee.

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By *d4fun73Man
over a year ago

Shipley

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward.

This is what makes me feel worried about meeting couples. This part specifically

When they stay and cuddle together and you go home alone? Me too."

Literally this! And then them just talking and debriefing straight away together about me and I’ve got to do the train home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also being on top, you’ve got about 1 solid minute of pleasure until my check engine light comes on and my knees start smoking.

I can’t even begin to describe how much this post has amused me. You’re amazing Mrs Shiv. Never change.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Oh, add roleplay to that list. Odd, considering I have been a roleplayer (D&D and LARP) my whole adult life. Somehow it's just awkward and silly when sex is involved.

Truth be told, I'm a bit boring in bed.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Also being on top, you’ve got about 1 solid minute of pleasure until my check engine light comes on and my knees start smoking."

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By *he love catsCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

"Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward.

This is what makes me feel worried about meeting couples. This part specifically

When they stay and cuddle together and you go home alone? Me too.

Literally this! And then them just talking and debriefing straight away together about me and I’ve got to do the train home

It's worse for us we have days of reclaim sex to get through

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m rubbish at recognising when someone fancies me.

I can never read the clues or take a hint when someone is flirting with me (consequently I have a gift for friend zoning people).

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"Saying goodbye when they are leaving the hotel room it's so so awkward.

This is what makes me feel worried about meeting couples. This part specifically

When they stay and cuddle together and you go home alone? Me too.

Literally this! And then them just talking and debriefing straight away together about me and I’ve got to do the train home

And this too.

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By *tsJustKateWoman
over a year ago

London

Role play and dirty talk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??"

It’s not we think we’re crap, we just don’t have the facilities for it

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

I’m just rubbish at the sex…

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"Literally, everything.

This *really* isn’t true, Dee."

I know it probably isn’t but I hate the fact how successfully peri menopause has managed to convince me it is.

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By *d4fun73Man
over a year ago

Shipley

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??

It’s not we think we’re crap, we just don’t have the facilities for it

They look ok to me! Have you tried dangling them..!!

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??

It’s not we think we’re crap, we just don’t have the facilities for it

I mean, I do, these babies can flop around a dong, but what is the point? Might as well fuck two really big stress balls, it'd be easier to get the angle right then I could have a break for a cuppa whilst you're doing it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??

It’s not we think we’re crap, we just don’t have the facilities for it

I’m a tiny bit jealous right now

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

We should start a support group you'd honestly get a better tit wank from a man than me. There's just nothing there

Can I join your group! It doesn't matter how crap you think you are I love it ??

It’s not we think we’re crap, we just don’t have the facilities for it

I’m a tiny bit jealous right now

No, don't be! Tit jobs are uncomfortable and awkward.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also being on top, you’ve got about 1 solid minute of pleasure until my check engine light comes on and my knees start smoking."

Ha ha wait until you get to my age, you look fantastic !

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By *elsh-guyMan
over a year ago

The land of the Dragon and loads of sheep

Cumming. Can't cum on que struggle to cum while wanking infront of others n all that stuff.

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By *ezebel100Woman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Tit jobs. Like trying to pick up a hot dog with two deflated water balloons.. not sexy.

Oh yeah this as well

Like am I meant to be enjoying it? Do I moan? What do I do?

It is a weird one! I never know if I'm doing it right. Basically I just lie there squishing my boobs together. Is that it?

Mrs TMN x

Joins the shit at tit wanks party. It feels like they could be awesome if... they were slippier, less slippy, different position...

We've tried so many times because the idea is great but the reality, not so much.

Another vote for the tit wank. You’d be surprised how many times I’ve been requested to do this knowing fine well I lack enough boobage to secure the penis. It’s just embarrassing

I'm joining too, just no good with small boobs

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By *aughty_Nat69Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Arranging meets…

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Sorry OP. This appears to have become the "nobody likes tit wanks" thread

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Arranging meets…"

I can help with this...

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Oral sex. It's not something I've ever been that great at sadly.

I also don't hate tit wanks. Are they my favourite thing ever to do? No.

Wait... I can say this!

I guess I'm not like other women on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry OP. This appears to have become the "nobody likes tit wanks" thread

You’ve just given him an idea for his next thread

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Oral sex. It's not something I've ever been that great at sadly.

I also don't hate tit wanks. Are they my favourite thing ever to do? No.

Wait... I can say this!

I guess I'm not like other women on here. "

We found one! Gents, step this way, Meli's giving out tit wanks and bloody loving it.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Sorry OP. This appears to have become the "nobody likes tit wanks" thread

We’ve got a whole separate thread for that now!

"What are you rubbish at sexually?"

Consistency, I think. Sometimes I feel like I’m pretty good at this sex stuff. Sometimes we’ll spend all night in and out of different positions taking each other from one orgasm to the next and it’s amazing. Then other times things start off well but just don’t go how we hoped. Maybe I’ll cum too soon. Maybe you will. Maybe we just don’t fit together as perfectly and there’s an awkwardness to the rhythm no matter what position we try.

I dunno. I feel like things can be AMAZING but not all the time. So I’m inconsistent.

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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago

for a penny

Role play.

I don’t know what to say or do. It all seems silly to me, I just can’t get into it.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Oral sex. It's not something I've ever been that great at sadly.

I also don't hate tit wanks. Are they my favourite thing ever to do? No.

Wait... I can say this!

I guess I'm not like other women on here.

We found one! Gents, step this way, Meli's giving out tit wanks and bloody loving it. "

I mean... giving them away? Yeah fair.

I mainly wanted an excuse to use that crap line

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Another vote for being rubbish on top. It hurts my knees and my boobs.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

My biggest weakness is that I'm too much of a perfectionist

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"My biggest weakness is that I'm too much of a perfectionist

This isn’t a job interview, you know …

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
over a year ago

Stourbridge

Maths

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"My biggest weakness is that I'm too much of a perfectionist

This isn’t a job interview, you know …

Isn't it? Oh. Better strike professional from my bio.

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

69.

If you are any good with me, I'm incapable of concentrating on giving head, so your blow job will be shit!

If you arent, its just doing nothing, while I give a blowie in an uncomfortable situation, and I wont pretend its good if it isnt!

I much prefer taking turns!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Oh. Better strike professional from my bio. "

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

Anything that requires creativity. Role playing, dressing up, dirty talk, imaginative pôsition de sex. Useless!

Luckily my 23” cock can cum 2 litres five times a session so everything else is just gravy. Not literally.

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Anything that requires creativity. Role playing, dressing up, dirty talk, imaginative pôsition de sex. Useless!

Luckily my 23” cock can cum 2 litres five times a session so everything else is just gravy. Not literally."

Says he lacks creativity but throws circumflexes around with panache. Pah, I'm not buying it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably everything

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Quickies. I take far too long to get going, and even longer to get anywhere.

Definitely not the right person to be first up to bat in a group situation!

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By *ruceyy OP Man
over a year ago

London

Being crap at titwanks is like being crap at giving at toothy blowjobs anyway so stop fretting ladies!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

69 I'm shit, I can either concentrate on giving good head or on enjoying it myself not both at once.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anal sex. Jab it in, give it a wiggle, game over.

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

Rubbish at getting BJ's...after a minute i want my go at her, I get too impatient getting them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm shit at chatting up

In daily life I hate random people/colleagues hugging me or touching me.

I have restrain from choking them out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Er, meeting people on Fab

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

"Er, meeting people on Fab"

But particularly this one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably bad at quite a lot of things but it really depends on the situation or who I'm with.

I think my biggest issue is my own thoughts. I can be very self conscious and so sometimes struggle to get out of my head and just enjoy. Or it prevents me being a bit more adventurous.

I don't think I'm particularly graceful or elegant and can be a little clumsy and awkward sometimes. Sexy doesn't come naturally to me very often.

I think with most things there's always room for improvement but sometimes the right person brings out the inner sex goddess briefly and that can be wonderful.

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By *amesBeelzebubMan
over a year ago

norwich

"Sexually?

Let's mix it up from 'i can make you cum in 2 mins'

I have no patience so mix it up lots until I lose energy and care so just flip the woman over and pound until I'm done

Sexually?

Sex...I'm rubbish at sex

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By *rumswingersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

Lying back and receiving oral. I start to feel guilty that I’m not giving!

Really need to practice receiving pleasure.

Oh, and housework. I’m shit at housework.

Thankfully I make up for that with other things

Mrs BS x

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

My feet I have the most ridiculously sensitive feet. I could be a salivating, snarling mess - tickle the bottom of my feet and I will snap out of it and start giggling like a little girl instantly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Taliking to nobody. Pretty much all on here lol.

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By *atnayCouple
over a year ago

STEVENAGE

"69 I'm shit, I can either concentrate on giving good head or on enjoying it myself not both at once.

Mrs "

Ns response

I'm the oppersite. I give more when I'm getting more.

But can't deep throat. Just gag and rech.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I've never had any complaints...so must be doing it right

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By *c_FingersMan
over a year ago

Stoke On Trent

Getting replies on fab..

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By *ruceyy OP Man
over a year ago

London

"I've never had any complaints...so must be doing it right

Fine I'll bang you!

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By *KloganMan
over a year ago

Ramsbottom

That nice brew in bed after… the one where you’re both laying together all entwined and slightly sweaty, holding each other..

That brew… the one where you can kick back and talk about the last two minutes.

I’m rubbish at it, it looks and tastes like gravel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No complaints from anyone.

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