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My bloody mother

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By *iamondsmiles. OP   Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Nearly 79 and was caught by a neighbour up a ladder taking the summer house down. Neighbour saw her and did it for her.

She's had a bollocking of me and my sister but she takes no notice. She forgets how old she is.

How have you got your parents to slow down as they get older. She's bloody 80 in 18 months she will end up really hurting herself

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By *andadbodMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Cancer has slowed my mum down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Their bodies will stop them. Aches and stiffness etc. My 80 plus grandmother still rides a bike, sews and many other things. It's a generation of very self sufficient people heh.

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By *lexanderSupertrampMan
over a year ago

Gourock


"Nearly 79 and was caught by a neighbour up a ladder taking the summer house down. Neighbour saw her and did it for her.

She's had a bollocking of me and my sister but she takes no notice. She forgets how old she is.

How have you got your parents to slow down as they get older. She's bloody 80 in 18 months she will end up really hurting herself"

I have to say, I admire her spirit

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By *iamondsmiles. OP   Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Cancer has slowed my mum down "
Really sorry to here that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d say let her crack on, inactivity does the most harm

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By *andadbodMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Cancer has slowed my mum down Really sorry to here that"

it’s fine, she’s totally prepared for the inevitable, but as you say, they’re so proud and stubborn they won’t let anyone else do things for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dad is 78 and won't slow down. He single handedly built himself an extension on the back of his house last year. He just doesn't know how to retire.

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

My dad will be 80 in January. The other week I had to stand at the bottom of the ladder while he was on the garage roof. We disagreed regularly about what he does. But he always says if he stops he may not move again. The compromise is I'm actually there while he does it rather than doing it on his own like he would otherwise.

So I will be standing at the bottom of ladders freaking out until he decides it's time to change roles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine are in their early eighties and still charging around the World. They’re currently on a six month driving trip around Australia. They’re far more active than I. My mother spends her entire day pottering about in her garden, planting and digging up all sorts and my father is forever tinkering with mechanical bits and bobs.

It’s why I left home. I couldn’t keep up with them and still can’t.

M

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By *iamondsmiles. OP   Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"My dad will be 80 in January. The other week I had to stand at the bottom of the ladder while he was on the garage roof. We disagreed regularly about what he does. But he always says if he stops he may not move again. The compromise is I'm actually there while he does it rather than doing it on his own like he would otherwise.

So I will be standing at the bottom of ladders freaking out until he decides it's time to change roles "
Yes I think that is the answer. But they are such a bloody worry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cancer has slowed my mum down Really sorry to here that

it’s fine, she’s totally prepared for the inevitable, but as you say, they’re so proud and stubborn they won’t let anyone else do things for them. "

That’s hard. All the best to you and your mum.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Sadly both mine are gone ,

I'd probably be worrying like you too if either of them was still here .

I guess it's a bit like when we when were younger and did what we wanted,despite what our parents told us.

Just be there for her & keep checking up on her ,try to give her a bit of independence as much as you can .I know its difficult.

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By *uer MalusMan
over a year ago

Narnia

Cancer and dementia can fuck off right now.

Love older people seriously not giving a fuck and grabbing what remaining time they have by the horns and riding the hell out of it.

Yes, for us who were the children to become the parental figure is hard but I would rather they live than simple exist.

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By *londebiguyMan
over a year ago

Southport


"Nearly 79 and was caught by a neighbour up a ladder taking the summer house down. Neighbour saw her and did it for her.

She's had a bollocking of me and my sister but she takes no notice. She forgets how old she is.

How have you got your parents to slow down as they get older. She's bloody 80 in 18 months she will end up really hurting herself"

There are 20 year old that hardly move themselves these days.

That generation and others before are an absolute inspiration.

They just get on with things that they need to do.

I understand your worry but it's amazing the energy and attitude still.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

My great Nan was going up a ladder cleaning her windows into her mid 90's she was as tough as nails Geordie lass with hand's the size of shovels and still used to give my grandad a clip round the ear in his 60's Lol.

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By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

Is that what I have to come?! I’m caring for my father in his 60’s and he keeps starting big jobs leaving me to finish them

It’s paining and grouting the bathroom this month

Damn it it’s like having another kid

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I made a deal with mine, he won't climb anything he can fall off and I take him and his mate to the football once a month

My worst fear for him is that he breaks a hip and never makes it back out of hospital

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By *iamondsmiles. OP   Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Sadly both mine are gone ,

I'd probably be worrying like you too if either of them was still here .

I guess it's a bit like when we when were younger and did what we wanted,despite what our parents told us.

Just be there for her & keep checking up on her ,try to give her a bit of independence as much as you can .I know its difficult."
I do give her her independence. Even when my stepdad was alive she was independent. The worst thing is she looks about 65 so it's hard to realise how old she is. But it really worried me her being up a ladder

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By *rsPricklePantsWoman
over a year ago

Room 237 at The Overlook Hotel, Suffolk

I understand where you are coming from just be glad you still have her and she wants to be active, mine only made it to 64 she would be 70 now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I completely get what your saying but my nan and grandad where on the go and doing stuff until the end. I definitely think this is gonna be me. The kids are gonna get fed up with me disapearing on adventures.

Seriously, if she feels capable a compromise to let you help is a good one, and bonus you get to spend time with her and having a laugh together.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

My dad's 96 and lives alone folks daily, is a member of several clubs and goes out nearly every day for coffee.

He wanted a new shed last year, the suppliers were going to erect it but needed a level base to put it on. So he built it. In March we arrived to find him helping the gardener put a fence up.

I think it's difficult to not worry about elderly parents but a mistake to tell them they can't do things.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

*cooks daily

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By *eanorWoman
over a year ago

?


"Cancer has slowed my mum down "

I know what you are going through, big hugs to to you

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"I’d say let her crack on, inactivity does the most harm "
This, it's when people stop doing things that the body will start to slowdown.

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

Obviously it’s not my place to say what other’s parents should or shouldn’t be doing.

But my mum died at 63 just as she and my dad retired and my dad has never really done anything since.

I feel so sorry for him, expecting the fun retirement for which he worked so hard, and deserved, but now just existing every day.

For what it’s worth, if I’m still alive and not suffering from some terrible debilitating condition when I’m in my 70s/80s/90s, I’ll be making a nuisance of myself all over the place!

Bugger sitting in an armchair waiting to die. Lettem do what they want, they are grown ups!

Just my humble opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Up until his recent death my 87 year old dad was independent and more tech savvy than I was

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough


"I’d say let her crack on, inactivity does the most harm "

This is so true.

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By *untimes wantedMan
over a year ago

Huddersfield

my mum is nearly 80 caught her other day knelt on the kitchen worktop cleaning the inside of the window behind the sink.

She still chops all her own firewood for the log burner.

The only thing she allows me to help with is doing the shopping for the heavier items and mowing the lawns.Does the rest of the garden herself

when i say anything to her all i get is 'what you want me to do just sit here waiting until i die'

She has always been active and worked all her life.

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