FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Conversational skills

Jump to newest
 

By *os_Goddessofdawn OP   Woman
over a year ago

In the clouds

It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

You can be as picky as you want to be

If someone doesn't excite you, why waste your time?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andadbodMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Nope that’s perfectly normal, it’s the guys who aren’t too picky, the message you get will have been fired over to a dozen other women in hope one will reply.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eus n EuropaCouple
over a year ago

louth

We agree your not too picky at all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os_Goddessofdawn OP   Woman
over a year ago

In the clouds


"You can be as picky as you want to be

If someone doesn't excite you, why waste your time?"

Exactly!! I want the excitement and anticipation

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os_Goddessofdawn OP   Woman
over a year ago

In the clouds


"No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with. "

Absolutely..there needs to be rapport mentally before physically

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nope that’s perfectly normal, it’s the guys who aren’t too picky, the message you get will have been fired over to a dozen other women in hope one will reply."

A hundred more like

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os_Goddessofdawn OP   Woman
over a year ago

In the clouds


"Nope that’s perfectly normal, it’s the guys who aren’t too picky, the message you get will have been fired over to a dozen other women in hope one will reply."

Yes and they often send the same cut and paste message to me again and again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

No.

Always put yourself in control of the situation.

You have boundaries for respect and wish to be spoken to like a human being instead of a piece of meat.

Always block and forget, if they not for you what's the harm? Do not tolerate any bad behaviour.

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os_Goddessofdawn OP   Woman
over a year ago

In the clouds


"Nope that’s perfectly normal, it’s the guys who aren’t too picky, the message you get will have been fired over to a dozen other women in hope one will reply.

A hundred more like "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with.

Absolutely..there needs to be rapport mentally before physically "

100%

The way to excite me is to brainfuck me first!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

Yes meet now less talk.

Give. Immediately.

Something like that yeah?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Simply use it as a blocking filter, you can choose whomever you like to meet, your right.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

You're just not compatible with people who don't want conversation.

Everyone has their criteria for meeting even the 'meet now' people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I used to block messages like that. Nothing to do with being picky

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andadbodMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Nope that’s perfectly normal, it’s the guys who aren’t too picky, the message you get will have been fired over to a dozen other women in hope one will reply.

Yes and they often send the same cut and paste message to me again and again "

The issue is, and has been for a while is guys join this site thinking it’s instashag. No clue of the swinging lifestyle so don’t really know how they’re suppose to compose themselves.

From my experience every women I’ve met I’ve had long conversations with, socials etc and talked about anything and everything, and not really been about sex, you have to engage in the mind, find out if they’re the right person you want to explore with, and enjoy the company of, most don’t seem to want to put that kind of effort in, they just want to blow their load, a copy of penthouse and 3 minutes can do that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uckMan
over a year ago

Scunthorpe DN15


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

Certainly not...

You're looking to invite someone into "your space".

From conversation you can get the feel of a possible meet.

I'd carry on using your intuition if you get a blank canvas with no colour.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *egDaySkipperMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

What makes you think they're not respectful?

Some people are here just for pure NSA sex. They don't want to get to know somebody it's their preference

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *razy_KatCouple
over a year ago

London

Certainly not hunny. There's to many chancers on here trying there luck creating profiles after profiles chancing it. I feel your pain hun xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Definitely not.

I do like to wind them up sometimes (the meet me now) especially when they're ridiculously far away

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline


"No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with.

Absolutely..there needs to be rapport mentally before physically

100%

The way to excite me is to brainfuck me first!!! "

On a Friday? Huh, kinky

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

No...you can be as picky as you want. Or have standards in approach ( or any other standards) as you want.

Your not obliged to respond

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with.

Absolutely..there needs to be rapport mentally before physically

100%

The way to excite me is to brainfuck me first!!!

On a Friday? Huh, kinky "

You know me!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

It's all about being enthused and energised by someone's conversational skills. I keep in touch with some of the menfolk of the fora and I'm rarely disappointed in the quality of their dialogue.

Surprisingly - and rather unfortunately - I find some (but not all) of the women quite lugubrious and unexciting when it comes to reciprocal dialogue and momentum in the chat. Certainly so when it's the woman who has instigated the conversation or made first contact!

The situation isn't helped when their profiles dictate 'chatting extensively' before meeting. They've clearly fallen foul of their own caveats.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

I don't reply to single word/emoji messages here or elsewhere as it shows lack of effort.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *akingMemoriesMan
over a year ago

Toronto

I feel your pain. I received an introductory message from a ‘couple’ at 6:15am this morning-the message said ‘Yes please’. Who introduces themselves like that? What does

It even mean? What do I say to something like that?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

Converse with those who want to converse

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I feel your pain. I received an introductory message from a ‘couple’ at 6:15am this morning-the message said ‘Yes please’. Who introduces themselves like that? What does

It even mean? What do I say to something like that?"

“I’ll see you at 8pm, get the Lambrini ready?”

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornypair300Couple
over a year ago

scottish borders

No your not too picky we have experienced the same type of thing with text talk in messages and people simple seemingly unable to hold a conversation for more than a message or two , we couldn’t jump into bed with people we don’t find attractive or that have no conversational skills at all .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Certainly seems to be a dying art - especially on fab.

I've lost count of the number of times I've sent a well stuctured message, asking a few questions only to get a single word response. And when trying to get some communication happening it feels like trying to get blood out of a stone most of the time, until the point where I just feel like I'm wasting my time and give up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *akingMemoriesMan
over a year ago

Toronto


"I feel your pain. I received an introductory message from a ‘couple’ at 6:15am this morning-the message said ‘Yes please’. Who introduces themselves like that? What does

It even mean? What do I say to something like that?

“I’ll see you at 8pm, get the Lambrini ready?”

"

Perfection.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *apidaryMan
over a year ago

Chipping Norton

I stand ready to receive messages from women wanting to meet me immediately based on my profile, but ready chiefly to question their intent, taste, sense and sanity.

Even if it's only a mute one of glances and gasps, sex has to be part of a conversation. The reality is one can achieve the mechanical side of excitement and orgasm alone. Sex is about the contact and exchange with another person. Or persons, as I've learnt since finding this site.

Obviously if there's an offer of Lambrini then all bets are off and nothing else is needed. Make the event extra posh by putting the mugs away and pouring it into glasses.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Certainly not, I love conversation and getting to know a person before arranging to meet up. It’s part of the foreplay,

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

You’re not too picky at all OP. You do you. How you want when you want.

I personally love a good conversation about all sorts of topics. But then I’m here to make friends as well as friends with benefits.

We’re all different

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mf123Man
over a year ago

with one foot out the door

I like to talk bubbles

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Why would you be picky OP?

No, I don't think you are.

I think it comes down to compatibility and how interested someone is in you as a person. I love talking, learning more about a person - I find people fascinating. But sometimes if the conversation is a bit stunted it means they're either not that interested or not one for talking online. Or maybe they don't have that headspace.

It's not picky to want people who you're compatible with.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

I need to have a good conversation with someone over a few days before I even meet them for a ‘normal’ date, let alone a good old fashioned ruinin’.

All too often I’ve matched with a woman on a dating app based on a few pictures and a short bio, only to realise after a chat that we’re not compatible. No point going on the date, then.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ravelling_WilburyMan
over a year ago

Beverley

I've found that a lot of people who state they want conversation have no fucking idea how to converse

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've found that a lot of people who state they want conversation have no fucking idea how to converse "

Exactly this. It tends to be the profiles that specifically state 'no one word messages' that send one word messages

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Nope i don't get it either ,when we havent even seen each others faces.Or they have no pics & not much text.

I just delete anyone who asks to meet in a first message,makes me think anyone would do.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *con7Man
over a year ago

BARNET

Nothing wrong with being particular in who you’d like to meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Must mean i'm a fussy git too.

I love a good old laugh, natter and flirt. Bouncing messages back and forth about the most daft of things, intertwined with subtle (and not so subtle) flirty little messages. Seeing a connection forming between us both.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely not, it's a basic requirement to converse with someone before letting them put their penis in me. It's bizarre that people don't get this but I guess to most people I'm just a talking pussy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think some people fall down here because their written skills are not as good as their face to face interactions. That's part of this medium, though, and it's not like you don't know that going in.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Absolutely not, it's a basic requirement to converse with someone before letting them put their penis in me. It's bizarre that people don't get this but I guess to most people I'm just a talking pussy."

On bad days here, I've felt like holes with optional pulse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

I'm sure there are people on here who do respond to the FAF type messages otherwise people wouldn't keep sending them..? however for the rest of us, conversation and a mental connection with people is just as important as a physical connection.

As for whether you're being picky? Absolutely not. You're entitled to your opinion and standards, just block, delete and move on!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No! You’re not too picky. I couldn’t sleep with someone I didn’t like. I wouldn’t want to meet someone I couldn’t chat happily with whether social or anything more. There’s got to be a connection, and quite frankly if people aren’t willing to explore it/nurture it they aren’t someone I want to spend time with.

Absolutely..there needs to be rapport mentally before physically

100%

The way to excite me is to brainfuck me first!!! "

This haha... Brain fucked is definitely the way!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

Wuu2?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

i think you'd get a much better idea in person, can you not do socials

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ezebel100Woman
over a year ago

Birmingham

This morning I got a message saying "Why no photo" I looked at their profile which turned out to be hidden. I messaged back saying "Why hidden profile?" He messaged back "Wrong answer" and blocked me, which just made me laugh.People are strange for sure.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"This morning I got a message saying "Why no photo" I looked at their profile which turned out to be hidden. I messaged back saying "Why hidden profile?" He messaged back "Wrong answer" and blocked me, which just made me laugh.People are strange for sure.

"

I think the answer was supposed to be "because I was waiting for you and only you to blow me away sexually. Thank you!"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

gretna


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

They probably font want a conversation when they meet xx some people on here lie… shocking I know x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ezebel100Woman
over a year ago

Birmingham


"This morning I got a message saying "Why no photo" I looked at their profile which turned out to be hidden. I messaged back saying "Why hidden profile?" He messaged back "Wrong answer" and blocked me, which just made me laugh.People are strange for sure.

I think the answer was supposed to be "because I was waiting for you and only you to blow me away sexually. Thank you!"

"

Lmao

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's quite frustrating on here at times. I don't understand people who send a message and ask to meet without even having had a conversation! So many on here I don't even reply to, because they have such lack of respect or care for who they're even speaking to.

Am I too picky?"

No, you are definitely not too picky. People assume us ladies have an instantly dripping noonie when their opening message is along those lines! It's an instant block from me on those ones.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top