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"Nope and if they did I’d open the door for them. "That beard game is strong | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that? | |||
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"Nope and if they did I’d open the door for them.
That beard game is strong "Cheers mucka. Us beardos need to stick together. | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " Lots of people. Some still leave and some stay. Some that leave come back a fortnight later. Almost to the day. As if they created a new profile 2 minutes after leaving.......  
A | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that?" Suicide, I dunno | |||
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"I've never threatened to leave but I have considered it occasionally. I've seen people threaten and their gender influences the reaction they get usually. I just think that they're frustrated by some aspect of the site and everyone needs a little attention. There's no harm in it. If course there are people for who the site isn't suitable either for their mental health or their requirements and it's best if they do go" Articulated it a lot better than me. | |||
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"There's better ways to reach out than threaten to leave. " Maybe but when all else fails that's their only option | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough " Put a pic of their face??? A pic of their elbow would be enough for some men to be begging to meet | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Put a pic of their face??? A pic of their elbow would be enough for some men to be begging to meet" You replied to my quote. Meet me? .... I see that a lot | |||
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"There is no need for the drama " A LOT of peeps in here thrive in it!  | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Put a pic of their face??? A pic of their elbow would be enough for some men to be begging to meet" You don't even needs pics when you're a woman on here , when I first joined and I hadn't found the message filters, I had no pic up for a few days and was told loads of times how sexy I was and did I want to meet when I had a blank profile .
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways " I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally. | |||
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally." Fair enough but I suspect you get a lot of attention anyway as a very attractive couple. How about the people who feel marginalised? | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Put a pic of their face??? A pic of their elbow would be enough for some men to be begging to meet You don't even needs pics when you're a woman on here , when I first joined and I hadn't found the message filters, I had no pic up for a few days and was told loads of times how sexy I was and did I want to meet when I had a blank profile .
"And how beautiful us ladies all are when we don't even have visible face photo | |||
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally. Fair enough but I suspect you get a lot of attention anyway as a very attractive couple. How about the people who feel marginalised?" Will take the compliment, thanks, but we don’t see ourselves like that. Solid 6/7. I wouldn’t be comfortable taking pity/fake attention regardless, it would make things worse imo. Plus there’s PLENTY of likeminded folk, lots of different shapes & sizes etc. I always tell people that if their self worth/confidence is that low this REALLY isn’t the site to be hopping on. | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough " This is very true! X | |||
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"People who threaten aren't going to leave, they are just looking for someone to notice. If I want to leave I just do quietly out the back door like most people." ,,,this | |||
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"People who threaten aren't going to leave, they are just looking for someone to notice. If I want to leave I just do quietly out the back door like most people.,,,this" I'm leaving right now....look at me, I'll be gone but not today | |||
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"“ I’m not fuckin leavin “ " I’M NOT FUCKIN LEAVIN!!!!!! | |||
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"It depends who, it’s nice having eye candy around. "I knew I had a reason to hang around | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " me  | |||
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"“ I’m not fuckin leavin “ I’M NOT FUCKIN LEAVIN!!!!!!" | |||
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"Reminds me of people threatening to leave in a relasionship just to get the attention, to gain control or to make themselves empowered. You want to go then go. " Oh yes that's a power game. Or the ones that tell you leave and then kick off when you do. If you go now don't ever come back! You just told me to leave? | |||
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"Lots who post those I'm leaving threads get plenty asking them to stay .I've rarely seen one that has no one asking them to stay. A lot of times they don't leave. Is it attention seeking or just someone wanting to say goodbye because they were actually thinking of leaving,well only the op who posts knows that. Plus I suppose it's easier to say goodbye in a thread if they are forum users because all messages get deleted when they leave so maybe that's why some who do leave post them. " I don’t think anyone has asked me to stay before.
I think people in those posts generally just wish people well and say goodbye. | |||
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"Nah if I’m leaving I usually post to let people know. I keep in contact with people but only who want to. " Don’t go. Stay! | |||
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"Lots who post those I'm leaving threads get plenty asking them to stay .I've rarely seen one that has no one asking them to stay. A lot of times they don't leave. Is it attention seeking or just someone wanting to say goodbye because they were actually thinking of leaving,well only the op who posts knows that. Plus I suppose it's easier to say goodbye in a thread if they are forum users because all messages get deleted when they leave so maybe that's why some who do leave post them. I don’t think anyone has asked me to stay before.
I think people in those posts generally just wish people well and say goodbye. "Lies. | |||
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"Nah if I’m leaving I usually post to let people know. I keep in contact with people but only who want to. Don’t go. Stay!" I’m off it’s too late!! | |||
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally. Fair enough but I suspect you get a lot of attention anyway as a very attractive couple. How about the people who feel marginalised? Will take the compliment, thanks, but we don’t see ourselves like that. Solid 6/7. I wouldn’t be comfortable taking pity/fake attention regardless, it would make things worse imo. Plus there’s PLENTY of likeminded folk, lots of different shapes & sizes etc. I always tell people that if their self worth/confidence is that low this REALLY isn’t the site to be hopping on." And yet there are often threads from men asking for their wives who currently have doubts about their attractiveness to be reassured and a legion of men ready to do it, threads from women saying they feel fat/ugly/old followed by replies telling them they're gorgeous. I agree that genuine approbation is rare and the kind you get here is like filling up on Mars bars when you're really hungry, it satisfies for a short while but in the long run gives you spots and rots your teeth | |||
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"Nah if I’m leaving I usually post to let people know. I keep in contact with people but only who want to. Don’t go. Stay! I’m off it’s too late!! " *watches you leave in a melancholy fashion | |||
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"If someone wants to leave it’s up to them, but sometimes they might just genuinely need to chat with someone. And just not feel confident enough to ask for help. So saying they’re leaving might just need someone to say “don’t go, stay… you’ll be missed” or a DM to see if they’re ok. "  | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us." Most of the daily updates are the same needy people supplying their narcissistic feed. Daily updaters are a red flag to me. | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough " Women don't need to put up any pics or text and they can get offers. | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Most of the daily updates are the same needy people supplying their narcissistic feed. Daily updaters are a red flag to me." How would anyone be successful on fab without seeking at least some attention? | |||
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"It depends who, it’s nice having eye candy around.
I knew I had a reason to hang around "Exactly, this is why there’s more men than women on here……. | |||
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"It depends who, it’s nice having eye candy around.
I knew I had a reason to hang around
Exactly, this is why there’s more men than women on here……. "Fuck, your right...I'm off then | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that? Suicide, I dunno" A threat does NOT imply damage to someone. The O.P. said , ' Who has ever made the threat to leave the site.' Nothing to do with harm to others or the self. | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " I occasionally consider leaving and let friends know in a message - there is a lot of pressure to just let my profile be dormant for a while... But it doesn't resolve the yo-yo of being here, so I can see why people do it in a thread - if you put it in a thread you are more likely to go through with it maybe? Some are flouncing or want attention, but some are genuinely hurting and low. | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough " Oh no they don't ..... | |||
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally. Fair enough but I suspect you get a lot of attention anyway as a very attractive couple. How about the people who feel marginalised? Will take the compliment, thanks, but we don’t see ourselves like that. Solid 6/7. I wouldn’t be comfortable taking pity/fake attention regardless, it would make things worse imo. Plus there’s PLENTY of likeminded folk, lots of different shapes & sizes etc. I always tell people that if their self worth/confidence is that low this REALLY isn’t the site to be hopping on. And yet there are often threads from men asking for their wives who currently have doubts about their attractiveness to be reassured and a legion of men ready to do it, threads from women saying they feel fat/ugly/old followed by replies telling them they're gorgeous. I agree that genuine approbation is rare and the kind you get here is like filling up on Mars bars when you're really hungry, it satisfies for a short while but in the long run gives you spots and rots your teeth" Wow we'd have to close the lounge forum, there would just be tumble  | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Oh no they don't ..... " Oh yes they do… | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Oh no they don't ..... Oh yes they do…" On NO they DON'T!  | |||
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"Men have it rough tbf They have to put in so much work just to be in with a sniff. Women only need to put a pic of their face and that's enough Oh no they don't ..... Oh yes they do… On NO they DON'T! "
At least you’re fun, Granny. Even if you’re clearly a fake | |||
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"Aren't we all here for attention? People just seek it on different ways I’d prefer it in a non pity/fake way personally. Fair enough but I suspect you get a lot of attention anyway as a very attractive couple. How about the people who feel marginalised? Will take the compliment, thanks, but we don’t see ourselves like that. Solid 6/7. I wouldn’t be comfortable taking pity/fake attention regardless, it would make things worse imo. Plus there’s PLENTY of likeminded folk, lots of different shapes & sizes etc. I always tell people that if their self worth/confidence is that low this REALLY isn’t the site to be hopping on. And yet there are often threads from men asking for their wives who currently have doubts about their attractiveness to be reassured and a legion of men ready to do it, threads from women saying they feel fat/ugly/old followed by replies telling them they're gorgeous. I agree that genuine approbation is rare and the kind you get here is like filling up on Mars bars when you're really hungry, it satisfies for a short while but in the long run gives you spots and rots your teeth" Yup I’ve commented on a few. The “Rate my wife” threads baffle me. No one wants a genuine answer and if someone dare say “2/10” they’d get lambasted and if they put something like “bit rough” likely a ban. | |||
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"If you’re a forum regular & female then generally the reaction will be a positive one. If you’re not a regular / single man, then brace yourself for incoming piss-take comments." I’m a forum regular and get the opposite as don’t sugar coat things and don’t give out false praise. | |||
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"If you’re a forum regular & female then generally the reaction will be a positive one. If you’re not a regular / single man, then brace yourself for incoming piss-take comments." Roxi
I love it when you come back.
Gives me new hope that this could be the time I get to shag you. | |||
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"If you’re a forum regular & female then generally the reaction will be a positive one. If you’re not a regular / single man, then brace yourself for incoming piss-take comments. I’m a forum regular and get the opposite as don’t sugar coat things and don’t give out false praise. "Couples = mixed response - depends on who they think is doing the chatting (based on the pics) Start a “I’m leaving thread”, see how it goes | |||
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"If you’re a forum regular & female then generally the reaction will be a positive one. If you’re not a regular / single man, then brace yourself for incoming piss-take comments. I’m a forum regular and get the opposite as don’t sugar coat things and don’t give out false praise.
Couples = mixed response - depends on who they think is doing the chatting (based on the pics)
Start a “I’m leaving thread”, see how it goes "Would get cheered as I cried myself out the door. | |||
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"Nope, but the OP of such threads probably need therapy "I'm having 3 sessions a week already, there's only so much I can do a week as a therapist  | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " Majority of the time I ignore and think 'off you fuck then' It's horrible when you see people being bullied off the site, but then people who have just tend to leave they don't announce it Makes me laugh when people quit, come back, quit, come back, quit, come back.... ad infinitum. | |||
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"If you’re a forum regular & female then generally the reaction will be a positive one. If you’re not a regular / single man, then brace yourself for incoming piss-take comments. I’m a forum regular and get the opposite as don’t sugar coat things and don’t give out false praise.
Couples = mixed response - depends on who they think is doing the chatting (based on the pics)
Start a “I’m leaving thread”, see how it goes
Would get cheered as I cried myself out the door. " | |||
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" As soon as you ask them why they're going or don't go then you could end up feeling an obligation to them and the party in question will form a connection to you. " Exactly this. They’re invariably looking for an ally or someone to latch onto and I’m too slippy for latching onto | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people..." Absolutely agree with this. Or y'know, you could pile on and tell them to stop attention seeking. | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people..." If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too | |||
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"People will have their reasons to leave and sometimes might be the tight thing for them. What can be upsetting is when you hear either from them or others that their reason was the abusive behaviour of other people on here. You can never assume what may have happened, but sadly there are some inconsiderate, selfish, aggressive people even in the forums that can get to someone after a while. Best of course to ignore them or even report if warranted as sometimes is the case. " The site is overrun with pests and liars. That's invariably the risk you run being here | |||
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"Not everyone does it for attention, not at all. Recently someone did it who seems to get plenty of love here - so why not carry on just being here instead? Some are quite sad, and some will surely be positive leaves too (esp on Fabguys I found - I remember one where, after quite a lot of men said "don't go" - though not me I'm proud to say - he literally went back to the woman he loved!). Last year on here I made a thread that said something like 'sod this I'm off for the sun', and was happy with the two replies I got! (yes of course I looked, most people will). One was from gentleman Jim and another saying I'm right I think. So no harm in saying when you're buggering off for me, nor in coming back some later date. pt" Alternatively just leave and come back when you fancy. | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too " Here's the typical response that I've become accustomed to over thr many years that I've been on fab. I never said that you have responsibility for people's rejection issues or how they recieve that. My point still stands that empathy and thought for others goes along way.. We all gain validation from off fab. You show me someone who says they don't and I'll show you lier. When some one shows us that attention then that makes us feel good. So I.e validating someone's feelings. It's nice to be nice remember that | |||
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"I expect when most people leave they need the break and don't envisage coming back. It's not demeaning anyone else, so people should be able to do it if they want. Just noticed the OP said 'threatening' to leave. I have seen that on FG, but tbh I don't think I have on FS. I think most people have decided they need to do it (ie they need the break from here) and are just saying bye. It's a natural thing to do when you have put a lot into a place like this imo. pt" You’re right, people can do what they want, but it just screams attention seeking. Imo it’s not overly mature, and if you’re seeking validation from randoms on a swinging site, you should probably work on your self confidence. I’m very aware I come across cold, rude and unnecessarily blunt on here, but I’m very genuine and will do anything for anyone that’s struggling. A brilliant example will be one of the regs on here that got torn to shreds in the forum and was struggling. Took him out for coffee & cake (the cake was amazing) and had a nice chat. | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Here's the typical response that I've become accustomed to over thr many years that I've been on fab. I never said that you have responsibility for people's rejection issues or how they recieve that. My point still stands that empathy and thought for others goes along way.. We all gain validation from off fab. You show me someone who says they don't and I'll show you lier. When some one shows us that attention then that makes us feel good. So I.e validating someone's feelings. It's nice to be nice remember that " Is fake validation really nice though? | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? " I’ve had someone beg me to go, is that the same? | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? I’ve had someone beg me to go, is that the same?" I hope you went full petty and showed your face more often? | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Here's the typical response that I've become accustomed to over thr many years that I've been on fab. I never said that you have responsibility for people's rejection issues or how they recieve that. My point still stands that empathy and thought for others goes along way.. We all gain validation from off fab. You show me someone who says they don't and I'll show you lier. When some one shows us that attention then that makes us feel good. So I.e validating someone's feelings. It's nice to be nice remember that Is fake validation really nice though?" Problem is as humans we tend to fix an internal problem with external solutions. So any external validation is all ultimately fake. What it comes down to is the meaning that we attach to it.....anyway thats me now going into work mode...so fuck that and just fab my pics as I'm.needy as fuck | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too " Just from the forum angle though, is a Lounge forum (or a Politics one for that matter) just about sex? I think people use this site for all kinds of reasons. I remember arguing this point on FG in the middle of the pandemic, with a guy who had completely forgotten the lockdown was on! I used to get asked for meets almost every day during the pandemic over there, a lot of young people esp were gagging for it. I wondered about the sense in keeping it open, but in general FG was a place people could go to I think. The forum there actually went from really small to huge during that time. People got really connected to it. But if this is more about people saying "Is this site really worth it, I've had enough of x and am thinking no" if I reply I tend to be positive about what Fab can offer, as a lot of people don't use it to its full potential I think. You have to build a skin here for sure, but there is no harm in informing someone of that. So I suppose, to answer your question from that angle, people do get advised to 'stick around' and give it more of a go! pt | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? I’ve had someone beg me to go, is that the same? I hope you went full petty and showed your face more often? "I figured it was a veiled request for graphic cock pics from multiple angles so I obliged. | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Here's the typical response that I've become accustomed to over thr many years that I've been on fab. I never said that you have responsibility for people's rejection issues or how they recieve that. My point still stands that empathy and thought for others goes along way.. We all gain validation from off fab. You show me someone who says they don't and I'll show you lier. When some one shows us that attention then that makes us feel good. So I.e validating someone's feelings. It's nice to be nice remember that Is fake validation really nice though? Problem is as humans we tend to fix an internal problem with external solutions. So any external validation is all ultimately fake. What it comes down to is the meaning that we attach to it.....anyway thats me now going into work mode...so fuck that and just fab my pics as I'm.needy as fuck "Ooo I like that, great point! P.s You’re an awesome human and have my genuine validation  | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Here's the typical response that I've become accustomed to over thr many years that I've been on fab. I never said that you have responsibility for people's rejection issues or how they recieve that. My point still stands that empathy and thought for others goes along way.. We all gain validation from off fab. You show me someone who says they don't and I'll show you lier. When some one shows us that attention then that makes us feel good. So I.e validating someone's feelings. It's nice to be nice remember that Is fake validation really nice though? Problem is as humans we tend to fix an internal problem with external solutions. So any external validation is all ultimately fake. What it comes down to is the meaning that we attach to it.....anyway thats me now going into work mode...so fuck that and just fab my pics as I'm.needy as fuck
Ooo I like that, great point!
P.s
You’re an awesome human and have my genuine validation "Thats kind thank you  | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Just from the forum angle though, is a Lounge forum (or a Politics one for that matter) just about sex? I think people use this site for all kinds of reasons. I remember arguing this point on FG in the middle of the pandemic, with a guy who had completely forgotten the lockdown was on! I used to get asked for meets almost every day during the pandemic over there, a lot of young people esp were gagging for it. I wondered about the sense in keeping it open, but in general FG was a place people could go to I think. The forum there actually went from really small to huge during that time. People got really connected to it. But if this is more about people saying "Is this site really worth it, I've had enough of x and am thinking no" if I reply I tend to be positive about what Fab can offer, as a lot of people don't use it to its full potential I think. You have to build a skin here for sure, but there is no harm in informing someone of that. So I suppose, to answer your question from that angle, people do get advised to 'stick around' and give it more of a go! pt" That’s very fair and a great point. Shall adjust my attitude a wee bit, thanks. | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? I’ve had someone beg me to go, is that the same? I hope you went full petty and showed your face more often?
I figured it was a veiled request for graphic cock pics from multiple angles so I obliged. "I salute your petty! | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? I’ve had someone beg me to go, is that the same? I hope you went full petty and showed your face more often?
I figured it was a veiled request for graphic cock pics from multiple angles so I obliged. "Felix... please go | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that? Suicide, I dunno" Direct them to their GP, Community Mental health Team and Mental Health Crisis team. That's crazy talk....I can say that because I'm crazy... Any suicidal thoughts, I call my local mental health crisis line to talk me off a ledge. Doesn't happen too often these days because I've had intensive therapy. I think people often interpret my statements as threats but it's actually me needing to disconnect from people for my own sanity.....what limited sanity that I actually have. I know the average person views this as intentional attention seeking but it's actually a sign of a person not having a basic mental need met and not being able to communicate that need in an appropriate and coherent and effective way. In a way, it is attention seeking but I encourage everyone to set boundaries and state clearly if you cannot meet that person's need for attention. It's a fallacy that one person can meet all of our needs all of the time. Some people have a built-in support network. Some people like me do not. I had to create my own support network and I use my disability money to pay £430 for support this month. ( nothing sexual/romantic) Set your boundaries to protect yourself and direct the person making any threats to the appropriate professional support. Cheers MM | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too " Let's just say the site is a hook-up site for you only in particular OP. As I've stated before and will state again, Being neurodivergent, being a swinger is part of my recovery and relapse prevention plan, acknowledged, validated, sanctioned, and appraised by my mental health professionals and mental health peer support. I actually go to them if I need complex advice. People do make friends/ make relationships and have a social connection in the swinging lifestyle out of Fab. I love nothing more than sitting nude in the jacuzzi meditating alone in a club. Lol! No hook up necessary. if a hook-up occurs that's icing on the cake for me. We all have boundaries but we don't need to drop those brick walls on people's heads in the first instance. | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that? Suicide, I dunno Direct them to their GP, Community Mental health Team and Mental Health Crisis team. That's crazy talk....I can say that because I'm crazy... Any suicidal thoughts, I call my local mental health crisis line to talk me off a ledge. Doesn't happen too often these days because I've had intensive therapy. I think people often interpret my statements as threats but it's actually me needing to disconnect from people for my own sanity.....what limited sanity that I actually have. I know the average person views this as intentional attention seeking but it's actually a sign of a person not having a basic mental need met and not being able to communicate that need in an appropriate and coherent and effective way. In a way, it is attention seeking but I encourage everyone to set boundaries and state clearly if you cannot meet that person's need for attention. It's a fallacy that one person can meet all of our needs all of the time. Some people have a built-in support network. Some people like me do not. I had to create my own support network and I use my disability money to pay £430 for support this month. ( nothing sexual/romantic) Set your boundaries to protect yourself and direct the person making any threats to the appropriate professional support. Cheers MM " Fab could consider making a referral page for that kind of information perhaps. Something that's just one click away. pt | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too " Taking rejection is one thing but can't you see how constant rejection can wear away at a person's self confidence leaving them frustrated and needing to vent? Whenever something in your life doesn't go your way; job, money, family etc. do you not feel the need to vent? How would you feel if someone just told you to take it on the chin and move on? Essentially... Stop telling people what they can and can't do on here. | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!!" And why does that affect your use of the site? | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! And why does that affect your use of the site?" Second time I've asked this btw... | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!!" The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with. | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us." Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up. | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up." And why does that affect your use of the site? | |||
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Not often I pause before diving in head first! | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! "I do a scratch and sniff test first  | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! "DO IT! | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first!
I do a scratch and sniff test first "Legit used to do that in my army days! | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! DO IT!"Don’t encourage me ffs | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up. And why does that affect your use of the site?" Other than using it as another filter, you mean? I just eyeroll at those statuses and carry on, no time for or interest in drama llamas. | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up. And why does that affect your use of the site? Other than using it as another filter, you mean? I just eyeroll at those statuses and carry on, no time for or interest in drama llamas. " That is so dramatic | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up." | |||
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"This site is all about the dignity lol" The joy of a humiliation kink. | |||
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" Genuine question, who's ever made this threat and had someone beg them not to go? A threat implies damage to someone, how would leaving the site ever cause that? Suicide, I dunno Direct them to their GP, Community Mental health Team and Mental Health Crisis team. That's crazy talk....I can say that because I'm crazy... Any suicidal thoughts, I call my local mental health crisis line to talk me off a ledge. Doesn't happen too often these days because I've had intensive therapy. I think people often interpret my statements as threats but it's actually me needing to disconnect from people for my own sanity.....what limited sanity that I actually have. I know the average person views this as intentional attention seeking but it's actually a sign of a person not having a basic mental need met and not being able to communicate that need in an appropriate and coherent and effective way. In a way, it is attention seeking but I encourage everyone to set boundaries and state clearly if you cannot meet that person's need for attention. It's a fallacy that one person can meet all of our needs all of the time. Some people have a built-in support network. Some people like me do not. I had to create my own support network and I use my disability money to pay £430 for support this month. ( nothing sexual/romantic) Set your boundaries to protect yourself and direct the person making any threats to the appropriate professional support. Cheers MM Fab could consider making a referral page for that kind of information perhaps. Something that's just one click away. pt" We ( the Fab neurodivergent community) have tried to no avail. They do not want the liability.  | |||
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"Some empathy goes a long way, whether they do it out of self seeking behaviour looking for a bit of validation or reassurnace. Please bear in mind these are human beings not human doings, so people with feelings, and insecurities just like the rest of us. Some kindness and a bit of love goes along way with people... If they're not getting the attention they're seeking then maybe they should reevaluate there choices to be on this site Let's not forget what this site is for.... Sex, not politics, love or even friendship. It's a hook up site pure and simple You wouldn't buy an item from the shop if you didn't want it would you? Or test drive every car? People need to take rejection or leave We are not responsible for those we aren't attracted too Taking rejection is one thing but can't you see how constant rejection can wear away at a person's self confidence leaving them frustrated and needing to vent? Whenever something in your life doesn't go your way; job, money, family etc. do you not feel the need to vent? How would you feel if someone just told you to take it on the chin and move on? Essentially... Stop telling people what they can and can't do on here." Uh oh... I take rejection pretty hard but....that's what my therapist and support groups are for to help me through it .....but I recognise not everyone has this....or family and friends who can help with this. It's a tough life. Not telling anyone what to do per se....just a different perspective that they may or may not want to consider... according to their current capability and capacity. | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with." That's you slipping back into work mode again...
I actually expect people to be horrible after what I've been through and what I've seen and heard other people go through so I'm learning and intend to keep learning to protect myself psychologically and physically.
It might be paranoia but it is definitely based on evidence I've been witness too. As my FWB says people suck.
They don't care about other people's struggles. They don't have the capacity to hear it. they are often too wrapped up in their own struggles and as my therapists used to say their mentalization capacity is reduced...they don't have space to think about what others are thinking and why.
When they put mentalization like that I realize people only have so many spoons as they say in the autistic community.
My Dad is 75 and he still lashes out when his capacity is reduced. You have to pick your moment and your words carefully with him. | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! "Lol! I'm too bloody honest. Sorry all. Not seeking attention....right now...maybe later....My leg needs more attention than me...right pain in the...leg... | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first!
I do a scratch and sniff test first "I might get triggered if I sniff. Perils of sensory sensitivity. there are a few customers at work that send me running for the loo due to their....odour.. | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! DO IT!"The peer pressure. | |||
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"Nope and if they did I’d open the door for them. "and close it behind them | |||
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"Hmm do I, or don’t I engage in the debate…
Not often I pause before diving in head first! DO IT!
Don’t encourage me ffs "Twiddles finger innocently and sips rum and cola. | |||
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"Just scream’s attention seeking to us. Absolutely. Either go with dignity or stay and shut up. And why does that affect your use of the site? Other than using it as another filter, you mean? I just eyeroll at those statuses and carry on, no time for or interest in drama llamas. " Did someone say drama? Pops up my head. Did someone say Llama? Pops down my head. Everything about me is dramatic unfortunately....I'm not for the faint of heart.....or anyone without a psychology degree..probably.. | |||
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"People would cheer if I left " We would not.....I mean where else would I get my light entertainment? | |||
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"This site is all about the dignity lol" I think I left my dignity back in 2013 when I had a mental breakdown, unaliving attempt and 6 police officers had to carry me out of my marital flat..I swear back then I only weighed like 150 lbs. Dignity is not something this neurodivergent gets a lot of. Rejection, invalidation, abuse, unfairness, judgment and unsupportive comments? Now that I'm an expert of being on the receiving end of. | |||
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"This site is all about the dignity lol The joy of a humiliation kink. "I haven't gotten far enough to trust someone enough to humiliate me.....um...on purpose.....without me retaliating....Lol! Dangerous liaison....I am not the one for amateurs. plenty of amateurs on Fab.
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" This site is all about the dignity lol The joy of a humiliation kink.
I haven't gotten far enough to trust someone enough to humiliate me.....um...on purpose.....without me retaliating....Lol!
Dangerous liaison....I am not the one for amateurs. plenty of amateurs on Fab.
"A lot of trust and building slowly, or failing that let you retaliate and then punish you for it. Roxy x | |||
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"A guy i had been talking to recently suddenly told me he thought he was going to leave. He got quite aggressive asking for my number to keep in touch. I found it quite amusing as he kept saying "quick, I'm deleting my profile now". He's obviously still on fab! " The art of dealing with desperate man I guess, good you found it amusing I think. pt | |||
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" Fab could consider making a referral page for that kind of information perhaps. Something that's just one click away. pt We ( the Fab neurodivergent community) have tried to no avail. They do not want the liability. :-
("I can kind of see that sadly. They are as hands-off as they can be here really. pt | |||
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" This site is all about the dignity lol The joy of a humiliation kink.
I haven't gotten far enough to trust someone enough to humiliate me.....um...on purpose.....without me retaliating....Lol!
"You know that's a kink in itself? lol pt | |||
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"I just say to people that no one is holding a gun to your head making you stay… and if this place isn’t making you happy or is affecting your mental health then why are you doing it is it’s self destructive… You don’t have to go… you don’t have to announce it you are going… Just hide the profile and recharge the batteries! If you want to come back when you are in a better place then cool… if not.. at least you can say you tried and it wasn’t for you " When I go I'm going to announce it. Tell me why I shouldn't. | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! And why does that affect your use of the site?" And I said that when?? | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with." We all have personal struggles, I tend to keep mine to myself. | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with. We all have personal struggles, I tend to keep mine to myself." | |||
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"My Dad is 75 and he still lashes out when his capacity is reduced. You have to pick your moment and your words carefully with him. " Sounds like dementia management. Well worth learning the skills. I knew a guy who just wouldn't go near his once-loved grandad because he got so angry with him just the once and he (the grandson) couldn't handle it. I heard the old fella died the other day, hope he managed to made the effort in the end. 1) never take it personally 2) be ready to change the subject 3) try and be prepared in advance what to say. pt | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with. We all have personal struggles, I tend to keep mine to myself.
"Why should others do the same though? All these kind of threads are easy to spot, just resist the schadenfreude (if you guys actually can ) and pass by!
pt | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with." Absolutely. If ever we get caught up thinking we're a part of an open minded community, just pop into the forums to remind ourselves that we're just as closed minded as those that judge this lifestyle. *Shrugs* | |||
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"The thing is, when people feel the need to announce their departure it smacks of attention seeking. If you're going to leave, then leave!!! The levels of humanity on fab forums never fails to amaze me. So dismissive of others and what they may be struggling with. We all have personal struggles, I tend to keep mine to myself.
Why should others do the same though?
All these kind of threads are easy to spot, just resist the schadenfreude (if you guys actually can ) and pass by!
pt "I do not take pleasure in others peoples misfortune. People have opinions and are entitled to air them. | |||
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