FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Hi fatty

Jump to newest
 

By *ayHaych OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)

I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

It's extremely rude is what it is...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

Seems a bit odd to me in all honesty ..We’ve been on and off here and other sites for over 20 years and have never once had a message that starts with hi fatty ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Personally I'd tell them to fuck off.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iasubTV/TS
over a year ago

Ilkeston

Noooooo huge red flags:

1 thats just horrible to say to someone. Would people say that at a bar? Probably not so why on here

2 if degradation is there kink they should know limits, boundaries and CONSENT. Which being in the first message isnt there

3 if thats all they got to say to begin with wheres it likely to stop in terms of name calling

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

For lots it's a positive kink and many don't take the word fat/chubby etc in any negative way.

It's actually a good filter for a first message, as the ones they are looking for, would respond in kind, or say get lost

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I'd say it's more often along slut line of derogatory terms, but there's the occasional chubby chaser appears with apparently no idea of how to approach people either.

None of them get a positive response from me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nkyCplCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Ignore, delete and block. Not worth the energy and certainly not worth getting upset by.

Why some people feel the need to intentionally upset others is beyond me. I always think they must be going through a really shitty time, down on themselves, miserable etc as there’s know other reason (prefer to assume no one’s just a complete cunt for no reason).

Anyway mucka don’t give it any thought and have the best bank hols.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *athers123Man
over a year ago

Harpenden

Seems rude.

I suppose most messages are like fishing. The person sending it may want a kind of Dom relationship with a "fatty". If they send enough messages like that then they'll get responses from the type of person they're looking for. So it's not aimed at you personally more at the person they're looking for.

Still fucking rude and inconsiderate though but that doesn't stop a lot of people these days.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nkyCplCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"For lots it's a positive kink and many don't take the word fat/chubby etc in any negative way.

It's actually a good filter for a first message, as the ones they are looking for, would respond in kind, or say get lost "

I never considered that actually.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *cotCouple666Couple
over a year ago

Central Belt

Bit weird I certainly wouldn't be happy with or respond to an opening message like that. I'm very aware that I'm on the chunky side, but I'd hate a complete stranger pointing it out.

Beth x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss_Juicy79Woman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Block and move on I've had my fair share of the fat comments over the years they ain't worth your time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oofy321Man
over a year ago

moon base zero

Strange way to start a message, sure that message wasn't for me?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

It wouldn't bother me if someone said hello fatty as my fat gives me a thick skin

I might be tempted to look at their profile and pick something to respond back with.

If there's nothing there I might say something like wassup numbnuts

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ayHaych OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)


"Seems a bit odd to me in all honesty ..We’ve been on and off here and other sites for over 20 years and have never once had a message that starts with hi fatty .."

I’ve been on fab since I was 18 and it’s only in the past few months haha. One way of measuring weight gain over time!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

rude tbh block and move on

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ayHaych OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)


"For lots it's a positive kink and many don't take the word fat/chubby etc in any negative way.

It's actually a good filter for a first message, as the ones they are looking for, would respond in kind, or say get lost "

That’s what I was thinking tbh.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them to fuck off. If they think that it is acceptable to use those terms when they don't know you how the fuck would they speak to you when they do?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ocksareoffMan
over a year ago

Out n About

Maybe as a greeting from a close/long term friend. But it's certainly not acceptable from a stranger, it's just bloody cheeky.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep... I second this. I don't think it would ever be ok to start a conversation like this with someone you do not know and are not familiar with

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Rude!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get this all the time fab is fab

You’re dammed if you show pics

You’re dammed if you don’t

Think it’s outright rude what they said to you

Say thank you instant block

I know we hear for only one reason

But there is no need for comments such as this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Not acceptable. I hope you ignored them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never ever had any type of abusive messages here, and that’s with some ending up blocked for being pushy

Straight out block them they shouldn’t be doing that it’s definitely abusive

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But it may be seen by some as a term of endearment, but it takes a lack of empathy to realise not all see it that easy. So imo not on unless something in your profile suggested it was okay

(I have "hi shortie" to someone who mentioned height)

But a useful filter of miss matching views.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilthyParamedicMan
over a year ago

Lancaster

I can't say I have tbh—just a big no from me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ycanNightsMan
over a year ago

Workington

Tell them to fuck off and block.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights


"For lots it's a positive kink and many don't take the word fat/chubby etc in any negative way.

It's actually a good filter for a first message, as the ones they are looking for, would respond in kind, or say get lost

I never considered that actually."

There's a guy on here that does it on the threads, he absolutely adores bbw, and half the thread will be full of people who don't see it from his eyes, and the other half who love it

Different things offend different people in different ways

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

My response would be 'why don't you fuck right off'. Not being funny fella, but that's just disrespectful to you, and you don't need that.

If you're in a relationship and that's a bit of fun you've got going, then OK, but as an opening gambit, nah

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

Just reply with 'alright saggy tits, hows it hanging?', should filter out those that give, but can't take

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women? "

Its obviously affected you you've hidden your pics but introducing themselves by saying " Hi fatty" is extremely rude hope you blocked them all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

Awful behaviour. I'm sorry to hear that you've had such uncharitable messages, OP.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time someone attacks your appearance, it's with malicious intent whether they put it in a nice tone or not. Save your time for good people OP, move on from those conversations.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even if it was someone's fetish, they've no right to assume you share it. It's liking writing to me and saying "Hi sub". And those men who do that get blocked because they're not respecting my boundaries. And not are those who write to you like that. Block.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

Odd and frankly unacceptable behaviour.

My understanding is people are lacking communication skills nowadays and and can’t tell the difference between supposedly “funny” and harmful way of talking.

Sorry to hear that happened to you OP, I use block button excessively for this reason.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women? "

that's an odd one ..I think to just randomly say that to anyone is rude ....was it accompanied with a wink emoticon or anything ?

My ex used to call me 'fatty' but it was more of a term of endearment as I was really really skinny in my younger years and I tried really hard to put weight on...so when it finally stayed on I was over the moon ...so it was like hi there fatty wink wink

Either way though OP don't let what ppl say affect your confidence ( I know easier said than done) .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ed MartinMan
over a year ago

Shefford

Could that be 1 arsehole who keeps getting banned and is starting new accounts?

I know there’s many unpleasant people out there, but there’s something about multiple accounts but using the same insult, that makes me think it could be the same person.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hyme2020Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow Scotland

Never acceptable, totally uncalled for and I’m thinking possibly a man posing as a woman or some kind of multiple fake accounts just out to cause trouble x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Blimey... It a heck of a opener... I'd expect that kind of joking familiarity from someone i know well

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ayHaych OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)


"I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women? Its obviously affected you you've hidden your pics but introducing themselves by saying " Hi fatty" is extremely rude hope you blocked them all "

Oh no I just didn’t want any public pics on at the moment. Wasn’t because of their comments

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women? Its obviously affected you you've hidden your pics but introducing themselves by saying " Hi fatty" is extremely rude hope you blocked them all

Oh no I just didn’t want any public pics on at the moment. Wasn’t because of their comments "

ok well a positive reaction why burn bridges

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ayHaych OP   Man
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)


" Its obviously affected you you've hidden your pics but introducing themselves by saying " Hi fatty" is extremely rude hope you blocked them all

Oh no I just didn’t want any public pics on at the moment. Wasn’t because of their comments ok well a positive reaction why burn bridges "

I didn’t, I kept chatting to some of them. the messages were polite and pleasant but that’s why it was confusing haha.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


" Its obviously affected you you've hidden your pics but introducing themselves by saying " Hi fatty" is extremely rude hope you blocked them all

Oh no I just didn’t want any public pics on at the moment. Wasn’t because of their comments ok well a positive reaction why burn bridges

I didn’t, I kept chatting to some of them. the messages were polite and pleasant but that’s why it was confusing haha. "

never allow people to be rude, check them on it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being a big woman and the fact that I'm very honest about it on my profile, I've had my fair share of guys asking to meet and when I (politely) say no thank you,the fat comments start. I simply block and thank my lucky stars I never need to set eyes on them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton


"I’m really curious to peoples thoughts on this.

Over the past few months I have got messages from a handful of women and couples (maybe 4 in total) which have started off with “Hi fatty” or “Hi chubby”. At the time nearly all my photos were public.

The thing is, the messages actually seem like their genuinely interested in chatting and not with any malicious intent. They haven’t mentioned anything to do with degradation fetishes, and even if so, that’s not in my profile so I would assume people wouldn’t dive straight in.

Interested in peoples thoughts on this or if people have experienced this? I’m comfortable and confident in myself but that could be upsetting to some people. Made me think, if it’s seen as alright for men but not for women? "

Bloody hell that's so rude.! If someone opened a message to me with that I'd tell them to fuck off... body shaming is never acceptable no matter the gender

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I would only do that with someone when I knew that everyone was ok with it. I wouldn't accept it from a stranger, and I don't think people with other gender presentations/ identity should* either.

* People can, of course, do what they want.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Instant block.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

I just privately replied to someone who posted on this thread so that ‘hi fatty’ comes up in the subject line.

If I don’t make it to see 6pm, it’s been a pleasure knowing you all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Woah! I find that extremely rude and I’d probably block them straight away. Fair enough if it’s someone you’re already comfortable around and they know your humour etc but not a complete stranger. That’s not ok.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds rude, but on the other hand, I'd actually be chuffed that people want to talk to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

Id bin 'em

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The messages would be deleted without response and the sender blocked

As an opening gambit, 'Hi Fatty' is just too much from a stranger

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford


"The messages would be deleted without response and the sender blocked

As an opening gambit, 'Hi Fatty' is just too much from a stranger"

Absolutely this btw!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Like others said messages like that would not even be opened,they would just get deleted unread and either a note on the profile saying what they said and to ignore any more messages or a block. More than likely the first option though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nkyCplCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"I just privately replied to someone who posted on this thread so that ‘hi fatty’ comes up in the subject line.

If I don’t make it to see 6pm, it’s been a pleasure knowing you all "

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha well played

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World


"I just privately replied to someone who posted on this thread so that ‘hi fatty’ comes up in the subject line.

If I don’t make it to see 6pm, it’s been a pleasure knowing you all "

You play dangerous games Gatekeeper, you may find that key shoved up your arse in 2 weeks time!

Thats another Malibu you owe me...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top