FabSwingers.com forum: The oracle is open

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

Hi, when will the Oracle next be visiting the North West of England

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Hi, when will the Oracle next be visiting the North West of England

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi, when will the Oracle next be visiting the North West of England

Well, she's still in the bath so it won't be tonight. Sparkle might tempt her his summer though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago

london stratford

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)"

Hail Jennie the omniscient,

Ohhh one of almighty knowlegde.

when in my matrix will a bi couple fancy me?

I need to know. so that I can take my blue pill!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Dearest Jennie,

If celibacy is the answer, what was the question?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dearest Jennie,

If celibacy is the answer, what was the question?"

question - What happens when your a man on fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?"

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual."

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)

Hail Jennie the omniscient,

Ohhh one of almighty knowlegde.

when in my matrix will a bi couple fancy me?

I need to know. so that I can take my blue pill!"

In YOUR matrix plenty already do.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Dearest Jennie. Kind of a twofer.

Will I manage to make it through the entirety of May without reaching a blank canvas? And will I get to have that inflicted by both of my favourite artists?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Jennie,

If celibacy is the answer, what was the question?"

What is Jennie's current state.

That is the question.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication"

Well take some you twonk!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Jennie. Kind of a twofer.

Will I manage to make it through the entirety of May without reaching a blank canvas? And will I get to have that inflicted by both of my favourite artists?"

Your canvas will be adorned during May.

But only by one of the two.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!"

i dont have any

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]"

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

Is fate real?

is it all just a bunch of random shit and we try to make some sense out of it?

Or is that a false dichotomy?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open."

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

All hail the Jennie

Will I get to go on the road trip I'm hoping for soon

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

Wonko the Uumellmahaye

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Sidebar...

Did they come from 30 individuals or 15?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is fate real?

is it all just a bunch of random shit and we try to make some sense out of it?

Or is that a false dichotomy?"

It's all predetermined... obvs ... thats how the Oracle knows everything that will come to pass

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

No.

Because once the head is severed you won't be able to find the jar.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

Wonko the Uumellmahaye"
huh?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"All hail the Jennie

Will I get to go on the road trip I'm hoping for soon

Yes.

But not as soon as you are hoping for

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

No.

Because once the head is severed you won't be able to find the jar."

surely i just sit it in front of me when i put my head in the guillotine?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

Hey Jennie...

What's 6ft long and wrapped around a twat?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple
over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

Wonko the Uumellmahaye huh?"

It's the surname of the brain in a jar in The Man With Two Brains. I need to watch that again soon.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

No.

Because once the head is severed you won't be able to find the jar.

surely i just sit it in front of me when i put my head in the guillotine?

You don't have a guillotine.

Jennie knows these things.

At keast you don't have one chonky enough ho cut through your neck

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)"
I am still waiting on our movie script

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"All hail the Jennie

Will I get to go on the road trip I'm hoping for soon

Yes.

But not as soon as you are hoping for"

I just ran the full gamut of emotion

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey Jennie...

What's 6ft long and wrapped around a twat? "

My lycia cat suit

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey Jennie...

What's 6ft long and wrapped around a twat?

My lycia cat suit"

*lycra

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!) I am still waiting on our movie script

.... its in the post....

And its a mini series.

Movies are so last year dahling

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"All hail the Jennie

Will I get to go on the road trip I'm hoping for soon

Yes.

But not as soon as you are hoping for

I just ran the full gamut of emotion"

Jennie is the mere font of the truth. It is for you to interpret

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

If baths provide wisdom, then do raisins provide them as well?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

No.

Because once the head is severed you won't be able to find the jar.

surely i just sit it in front of me when i put my head in the guillotine?

You don't have a guillotine.

Jennie knows these things.

At keast you don't have one chonky enough ho cut through your neck"

maybe your not so all knowing after all

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If baths provide wisdom, then do raisins provide them as well?"

No.

They give you the squits and make dogs poorly

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"will get any sleep tonight or will the back pain keep me awake?

The pain killers will help a little. You will eventually drift off but it will take longer than usual.

i need to get some then. i hate taking medication

Well take some you twonk!

i dont have any

Get some.

The garage down the road is still open.

can i just cut my head off and put it in a jar instead?

No.

Because once the head is severed you won't be able to find the jar.

surely i just sit it in front of me when i put my head in the guillotine?

You don't have a guillotine.

Jennie knows these things.

At keast you don't have one chonky enough ho cut through your neck

maybe your not so all knowing after all

We both know I am.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

DJ,

Should I get a fringe?

LDH x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?"

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

When the dog barks twice and the two owls hoot in the old yew tree.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"DJ,

Should I get a fringe?

LDH x"

Hmmm.

Yes but not too short and go for a rougher cut ... nothing too severe.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

When the dog barks twice and the two owls hoot in the old yew tree."

There's hope then!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Also...

When will I learn?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]"

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

When the dog barks twice and the two owls hoot in the old yew tree.

There's hope then!

I have the dog, just trying ho round up the owls now!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Also...

When will I learn?"

You wont

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ilkstressWoman
over a year ago

Drasnia

O omniscient Jennie, most glorious Oracle.

I have just been invited to visit a man in his garage this weekend. Given it's a bank holiday weekend, how long should I allow for traffic to get there?

Many thanks.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would"

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"O omniscient Jennie, most glorious Oracle.

I have just been invited to visit a man in his garage this weekend. Given it's a bank holiday weekend, how long should I allow for traffic to get there?

Many thanks."

Allow an additional 45 minutes.

And if when you get there the garage is lined with polythene sheets, leave immediately

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ilkstressWoman
over a year ago

Drasnia

"Allow an additional 45 minutes.

And if when you get there the garage is lined with polythene sheets, leave immediately "

Thank you - apparently the floor is padded for comfort so I don't anticipate polythene sheets.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Allow an additional 45 minutes.

And if when you get there the garage is lined with polythene sheets, leave immediately

Thank you - apparently the floor is padded for comfort so I don't anticipate polythene sheets.

And ribbed for pleasure

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

When the dog barks twice and the two owls hoot in the old yew tree.

There's hope then!

I have the dog, just trying ho round up the owls now!"

Right, got the owls.

On my way. Have your canvas ready!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future"

The ancient Greeks recommended finding where goats trip balls and hanging out there

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Also...

When will I learn?

You wont"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?"

Physically yes.

But not safe for work

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *omad_SolMan
over a year ago

Cheshunt

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)"

Can The Oracle please tell me when Penguins and Pandas will finally mate and create the new super species that will finally displace humanity upon this Earth?

Tho not sure if the name would be Panguins or Penda's as both are pretty lame tbf

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future

The ancient Greeks recommended finding where goats trip balls and hanging out there"

The Ancient Greeks were twonks

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future

The ancient Greeks recommended finding where goats trip balls and hanging out there

The Ancient Greeks were twonks "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jennie the omniscient knows all and is in her bath of wisdom.

Come to the oracle and ask your question. The great all seeing and all knowing will provide your answer.

(She's a bit rusty on Quantum Physics though!)

Can The Oracle please tell me when Penguins and Pandas will finally mate and create the new super species that will finally displace humanity upon this Earth?

Tho not sure if the name would be Panguins or Penda's as both are pretty lame tbf"

Never.

The genetics will mean that the panguin egg shells will be too weak to be viable and so the new species will be lost before it is found.

Sad but true.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future

The ancient Greeks recommended finding where goats trip balls and hanging out there

The Ancient Greeks were twonks "

^^^She knows

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 02/05/23 22:27:29]

^^^Twonk.

Dear Jennie,

Will the 30-odd kidneys in my fridge be defrosted in time?

Yes.

But only just.

But.

Do you really want to cook urine filters?

Oh, we have no intention of cooking them!

Er ... yeah... I knew that

Cos I know everything dont I?

[Nicely done Jennifer ... no one noticed]

They shall be dissected for edu-ma-cational purposes of the 'morrow

Yeah yeah. I knew that too.

I've just organised them into bags for each class. They smell like sheep piss

Well.

They would

They smell better than the ox heart I dissected (and live streamed) last year, to be fair. My camming and everyone else's is a little different

Slicing into offal is not the most effective way of divining the future

The ancient Greeks recommended finding where goats trip balls and hanging out there

The Ancient Greeks were twonks

^^^She knows

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?

Physically yes.

But not safe for work"

Good job I don't work then

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

Why do people push away the ones they love?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?

Physically yes.

But not safe for work

Good job I don't work then

.where ere ye be, let yer wind blow free

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I'm gonna have a go at making a low FODMAP aubergine curry and eggplant parmigiana this week.

Will they taste shit?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?

Physically yes.

But not safe for work

Good job I don't work then

.where ere ye be, let yer wind blow free"

It's not the wind I'm worried about

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do people push away the ones they love? "

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm gonna have a go at making a low FODMAP aubergine curry and eggplant parmigiana this week.

Will they taste shit?

Fry off the aubergine first go give it come colour. Asafoetida is good in a curry to give an oniony taste without using onions. You'll be fine x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x"

Dam you good

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Jen, will my next fart be "safe"?

Physically yes.

But not safe for work

Good job I don't work then

.where ere ye be, let yer wind blow free

It's not the wind I'm worried about

I predict your pants will remain pebble dash free

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

Dam you good"

Jennie knows all.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x"

You are spot on but for true oracle status... How do you make someone realise that it hurts everyone more?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

You are spot on but for true oracle status... How do you make someone realise that it hurts everyone more? "

Patience.

Kindness.

Time.

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

You are spot on but for true oracle status... How do you make someone realise that it hurts everyone more?

Patience.

Kindness.

Time."

Thank you for your wisdom.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Why do people push away the ones they love? "

Is everything okay?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will I ever enjoy my job again?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I'm gonna have a go at making a low FODMAP aubergine curry and eggplant parmigiana this week.

Will they taste shit?

Fry off the aubergine first go give it come colour. Asafoetida is good in a curry to give an oniony taste without using onions. You'll be fine x"

I have asafoetida in my cupboard. I'm getting Garlic infused olive oil too.

Thank you x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

You are spot on but for true oracle status... How do you make someone realise that it hurts everyone more?

Patience.

Kindness.

Time.

Thank you for your wisdom. "

This has helped me in the past:

'God (or whatever higher power works for you) grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference, living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; taking this world as it is and not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life'

Bless you.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Will I ever enjoy my job again?"

Only once Maureen from HR stabs your boss

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

Dear Jennie, (loving your work btw)

Can I do it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, (loving your work btw)

Can I do it?"

Never in doubt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Will I ever enjoy my job again?

Only once Maureen from HR stabs your boss"

Pahahahaha x thank you oh wise one

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

"Dear Jennie, (loving your work btw)

Can I do it?

Never in doubt"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"Why do people push away the ones they love?

To avoid intimacy, a defence mechanism against getting hurt.

Sometimes a feeling of low self worth x

You are spot on but for true oracle status... How do you make someone realise that it hurts everyone more? "

You can't make someone realise. You can be someone who appreciates and accepts them for who they are. Sometimes, with a little luck that can help them start doing the same for themselves.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie, May I ask if you know when my canvas will be adorned? (Inspired by Prey)

When the dog barks twice and the two owls hoot in the old yew tree.

There's hope then!

I have the dog, just trying ho round up the owls now!

Right, got the owls.

On my way. Have your canvas ready!"

Oops!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

Hello Jennie. I know you're probably out of your bath of wisdom by now, but can you tell me just what I should do with my hairy growler?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Why do people push away the ones they love? "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hello Jennie. I know you're probably out of your bath of wisdom by now, but can you tell me just what I should do with my hairy growler? "

Take it for regular walks.

Don't over feed it.

Teach it to fetch.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hello Jennie. I know you're probably out of your bath of wisdom by now, but can you tell me just what I should do with my hairy growler?

Take it for regular walks.

Don't over feed it.

Teach it to fetch."

Oh, and keep its claws clipped!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello Jenny the orical

Did you predict I would me a return

And also how long I will stay

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hello Jenny the orical

Did you predict I would me a return

And also how long I will stay

Your triumphant return was never in doubt. You will now stay forever, it is ordained.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hello Jenny the orical

Did you predict I would me a return

And also how long I will stay

Your triumphant return was never in doubt. You will now stay forever, it is ordained."

Awww thank you so much Jenny hope all is well

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Dear Ms TV

I recently kindly matched my friend up with a desperate, I mean sad, I mean lovely man, as I know she's in need of a bit of you-know-what. Notwithstanding my excellent promotion of her charms, she didn't seem impressed.

So, my question is, should I find a better class of friend?

Also, will I still be married in black and honeymoon on the Nile?

Yours,

Skinny B

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Hello Jenny the orical

Did you predict I would me a return

And also how long I will stay

Your triumphant return was never in doubt. You will now stay forever, it is ordained."

This is The Way.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Dear Auntie Jennie,

I’ve heard that eating fish is good for one’s brain.

How many portions of cod and chips will I have to eat to develop the intelligence levels of the late Stephen Hawking or Albert Einstein?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Ms TV

So, my question is, should I find a better class of friend?

Also, will I still be married in black and honeymoon on the Nile?

Yours,

Skinny B"

My answer to the first is yes. But finding friends to match your stellar class will be no easy task.

My answer to the second is I hope so x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Auntie Jennie,

I’ve heard that eating fish is good for one’s brain.

How many portions of cod and chips will I have to eat to develop the intelligence levels of the late Stephen Hawking or Albert Einstein? "

None.

They are both dead.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Dear Auntie Jennie,

I’ve heard that eating fish is good for one’s brain.

How many portions of cod and chips will I have to eat to develop the intelligence levels of the late Stephen Hawking or Albert Einstein?

None.

They are both dead."

So….technically, I am even more intelligent than both of these sagacious luminaries…

I am suddenly feeling blooming well awesome!

Thank you Jennie

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Auntie Jennie,

I’ve heard that eating fish is good for one’s brain.

How many portions of cod and chips will I have to eat to develop the intelligence levels of the late Stephen Hawking or Albert Einstein?

None.

They are both dead.

So….technically, I am even more intelligent than both of these sagacious luminaries…

I am suddenly feeling blooming well awesome!

Thank you Jennie

I can indeed confirm, you are more intelligent than the average corpse

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Dear Ms TV

So, my question is, should I find a better class of friend?

Also, will I still be married in black and honeymoon on the Nile?

Yours,

Skinny B

My answer to the first is yes. But finding friends to match your stellar class will be no easy task.

My answer to the second is I hope so x"

Dear Ms TV,

Yours,

Skinny B (Miss)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

In what country is it illegal to own only one guinea pig I'm thinking about buying one

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"In what country is it illegal to own only one guinea pig I'm thinking about buying one

It's perfectly legal in Torquay. You'll be fine x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear Jennie

Will I ever get to the bottom of the laundry basket?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Oracle

If 1 plus 1 really did make 3 would that break the universe.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie

Will I ever get to the bottom of the laundry basket? "

Sadly no.

Dirty washing gremlins will always drop an additional item in the basket every time you think you are done.

Gremlins are evil

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oracle

If 1 plus 1 really did make 3 would that break the universe.

A threesome will never break the universe

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do i keep coming back to fab?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

O glorious luminary,

Why is it that the most incompetent worry least about their competence?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"O glorious luminary,

Why is it that the most incompetent worry least about their competence?"

Because if they did they would seek to address the incompetence and thus no longer be the most incompetent

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do i keep coming back to fab?

To make us all suffer!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do i keep coming back to fab?

To make us all suffer!"

well thats no fun then is it

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is Fab.

Nothing to do with fun!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My car has given up the ghost

Kevin is going to the big scrapyard in the sky

Advice on new car !

Please

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

"
your the satnav voice????

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My car has given up the ghost

Kevin is going to the big scrapyard in the sky

Advice on new car !

Please

1955 Chevrolet Bel Air.

All the girls love anyone who drives one of those. Clunge magnet.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

They all live south of Oxford!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is t safe for a man of my age to have more than one wank a week?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Dear Jennie,

Is it really bad to fancy lots of the sweets in the sweet shop?..

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"is t safe for a man of my age to have more than one wank a week?"

It's healthy. Very good for your prostate!

Thrap away to your heart's content

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

They all live south of Oxford!"

Well time for me to sort some playlists and get driving then!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Dear Jennie,

Is it really bad to fancy lots of the sweets in the sweet shop?..

"
yes your teeth will fall out and you'll need dentures

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie,

Is it really bad to fancy lots of the sweets in the sweet shop?..

Its the whole point of sweet shops

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"Dear Jennie,

Is it really bad to fancy lots of the sweets in the sweet shop?..

Its the whole point of sweet shops"

Yay!

Thank you

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"Dear Jennie,

Is it really bad to fancy lots of the sweets in the sweet shop?..

yes your teeth will fall out and you'll need dentures

I'll just stay gummy. I'll make a fortune from giving sloppy BJs..

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

Jennie dearest,

Why does no one get my humour? I fear I have been pigeon holed as not a funny person, yet I think I’m hilarious

Marc

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jennie dearest,

Why does no one get my humour? I fear I have been pigeon holed as not a funny person, yet I think I’m hilarious

Marc"

You are joking, right?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

can i skip work tomorrow and just go home?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *endricks321Couple
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

Dear Jennie,

We have our first fab meet on Friday. How will it go?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

They all live south of Oxford!"

Hang on... *I* live south of Oxford. Southern Oxfordshire in fact. This isn't revenge for me referring you as a BJ expert to that rando, is it?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"can i skip work tomorrow and just go home?"

Yes

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

"Jennie dearest,

Why does no one get my humour? I fear I have been pigeon holed as not a funny person, yet I think I’m hilarious

Marc

You are joking, right?"

Maybe that’s the problem

Marc

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie,

We have our first fab meet on Friday. How will it go?"

You will be nervous ous and excited in equal measure. So will they.

You will spend ages getting ready but still be ready way earlier than you need to.

You will be obsessively checking for messages all day.

There will be moments when you doubt the whole process.

Then the meet will happen. After some brief slightly awkward seconds the conversation will start and there will be no stopping you.

It will be a very enjoyable time x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

They all live south of Oxford!

Hang on... *I* live south of Oxford. Southern Oxfordshire in fact. This isn't revenge for me referring you as a BJ expert to that rando, is it?

But you spoke the truth.

The oracle bears no grudges

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jennie dearest,

Why does no one get my humour? I fear I have been pigeon holed as not a funny person, yet I think I’m hilarious

Marc

You are joking, right?

Maybe that’s the problem

Marc"

The oracle reveals the truth in many and varied ways

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *endricks321Couple
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

Exactly what I was hoping for!! Thank you Gorgeous xx

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Oh Jennie the Omniscient how to I become more desirable in able to trap, I mean entice the men I desire

You do nothing.

The men worthy of you will desire you as you are.

The rest are just wankers.

Oh Jennie the Omniscient thank you for your wisdom!

Could you tell me if they have got lost of something though?? I'm quite good at directions if needed

They all live south of Oxford!

Hang on... *I* live south of Oxford. Southern Oxfordshire in fact. This isn't revenge for me referring you as a BJ expert to that rando, is it?

But you spoke the truth.

The oracle bears no grudges"

Ahhh fabulous. I *knew* the Oracle would know the truth of the matter.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

I reserve the right to change my mind if Cede turns up innan Oracle-induced frenzy of lust and tries to ravish me in front of the neighbours. For one thing, once they've seen that, they'll want some too, and then I'll get no peace!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I reserve the right to change my mind if Cede turns up innan Oracle-induced frenzy of lust and tries to ravish me in front of the neighbours. For one thing, once they've seen that, they'll want some too, and then I'll get no peace!

I predict

She won't.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Dear Jennie,

We have our first fab meet on Friday. How will it go?"

I don’t have any questions for the Oracle, I’m just stopping by to wish you two the very best of luck for Friday.

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By *endricks321Couple
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

"Dear Jennie,

We have our first fab meet on Friday. How will it go?

I don’t have any questions for the Oracle, I’m just stopping by to wish you two the very best of luck for Friday.

Aww thanks so much xxx

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

I predict

She won't."

Yeah. Fair.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

It's a great image though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's a great image though.

Half of it is!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC "

Clinical waste bin!

And wash those hands before touching any vegetarians

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC

Clinical waste bin!

And wash those hands before touching any vegetarians "

What about vegans?

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC

Clinical waste bin!

And wash those hands before touching any vegetarians

What about vegans? "

No one touches vegans. They're on Vega.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"It's a great image though.

Half of it is! "

No need to be uncharitable to the neighbours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC

Clinical waste bin!

And wash those hands before touching any vegetarians

What about vegans? "

Wash your hands after!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Dearest Oracle,

What do I do with the splodged up kidneys now?!

*Holds purple slushy at arm's length*

Yours,

Mrs KC

Clinical waste bin!

And wash those hands before touching any vegetarians

What about vegans?

Wash your hands after!"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear Jennie,

how to stop being so caring about everything and everyone?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear Jennie..what time can i start drinking, errr... Officially toasting the new king on Saturday??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie..what time can i start drinking, errr... Officially toasting the new king on Saturday?? "

Now!

O-Ficially

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A store has 150 apples.

Adam eats 13.5 apples, Jennie eats 7.25 apples, Sam eats 90 apples. How many apples are left? Give your answer to 1 decimal point. Please show your working out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A store has 150 apples.

Adam eats 13.5 apples, Jennie eats 7.25 apples, Sam eats 90 apples. How many apples are left? Give your answer to 1 decimal point. Please show your working out."

150 - 13.5 = 136.5

136.5 - 7.25 = 129.25

129.25 - 90 = 39.25

39.25 to one dp = 39.2

Jennie likes apples

Sam is a greedy bastard

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie,

how to stop being so caring about everything and everyone?

Work out who and what is worth caring about.

Work out what you can change and what you cannot.

Accept the above.

Above all accept you.

You are great.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Jennie predicts she will be the last poster on this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dear Jennie..what time can i start drinking, errr... Officially toasting the new king on Saturday??

Now!

O-Ficially "

Fuck yes! My kinda oracle!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is being an arse hole the best way to attract women on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why did granny set us a challenge to answer 10 Qs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It would appear the thread has run out of space.

But Wonko ... being nice is always best with the ladies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And Midnight.

She didn't... you were only supposed to answer one of the questions

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