FabSwingers.com forum: Is sex...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think the answer to that is different for each individual

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

For outside our relationship me sex is sex, it's just something I enjoy.

With the Mr it's deeper it's intimate, loving and just different.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

Deep psychological question. To answer that is to know yourself. I know why I've used sex in the past, what sex means to me today, and what I get out of it. A part from instant gratification rhat makes me feel good

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

Depends how big it is.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

The only other need is to do it again or to have anal

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always. "

The second I hit “post message” I came to that realisation

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always. "

Snap!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

Snap!"

Jinx!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think the answer to that is different for each individual"

Yes and it varies at different times too.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

Snap!"

We clearly both own a wand.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

I like it deep

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

I like it deep

Legs over shoulders deep. Tongue punching deep

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *_hot_hornyCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

We've always believed you get out what you put in

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on you, or oneself I should say. For some it's simply;

a) A physical release for a primal urge, i.e. come, doesn't matter who with/any hole's a goal, etc.

b) For others, they want a connection, a meeting of minds, even if only on outlook, humour, values, shared intimacy, companionship and human contact.

c) The ultimate will be actual l*ve, that commitment to a life partner. All the elements of b) but you would die for them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *heExcommMan
over a year ago

Llantrisant

It can be just about sex if that's what you're after, otherwise it can be so much more

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

I like it deep

Legs over shoulders deep. Tongue punching deep

A tongue doesn't really go what I'd call deep...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

I like it deep

Legs over shoulders deep. Tongue punching deep

A tongue doesn't really go what I'd call deep..."

Still deeper than some

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unpopular opinion here but I think some people do use sex as a gateway to intimacy, affection even.

I don't think it's always bad thing to use sex for unmet needs (whatever they might be) if you are honest with yourself about your needs and your boundaries so you don't get hurt.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always. "

That's a sad indictment

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

Ses is sex really..

bit it's more enjoyable if there is connection and trust.can push on each others boundaries etc...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

"
its so deep....... Its just sex a bodily function that we have a need to requite, now love and sex thats another question

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I don't think there's a right or wrong answer to it, as long as you're not hurting yourself or others.

Sex can be a simple fuck, a delight in sharing your body with another for that moment in time, a primal lust fuelled fuck where you need that other.

It can be the act of two people discovering more about each other, exploring their compatibility without it becoming a Big Thing. Friends sharing that experience, enjoying it for what it is.

It can be an expression of love, of care, of intimate feelings for each other.

It can reclaim, remind, represent how you feel about another person, intertwining bodies a signifier of intertwining feelings. A bond.

I think the best sex is one where there are feelings involved, reciprocated and transferred through touch. Whether that's lust, friendship, desire or love.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

….

I like it when it’s deeper

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

In some circumstances and with some people, sex is just sex, a happy source of endorphins and catharsis. Sometimes it's more.

The times I need something else but sex would help, I deal with the something else first.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, on here. It’s just sex most of the time. Sometimes you can meet someone where it’s a little more than that, friends maybe but I don’t look for anything more. I’m not looking for feelings to be involved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Sometimes it about sex, other its about a loving bond, others exploration, others power, other control, others for the energy, others for the need of the affection fom other, others it about leting go...etc.....etc.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *herry delightWoman
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

For me sex is just sex a very enjoyable activity.

I can see that to some sex is a substitution for something and can be more then just sex. If you are this is not the place you should be, you should be do some wellbeing.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?"

My best wank rarely eclipses anything other than a really shit shag so having expectations of sex with a partner lower than with yourself doesn't say much about some of your previous partners or maybe your interaction with them. All said in a non judgemental judgy way of course

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

It can be either. It very much depends on the circumstances and people involved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??"

That’s why I think I’d always want to only share myself with someone I think knows me, would now where to touch me, exploring where is most sensitive, where the most arousal is found.

You mentioned the other day about if people would do something for someone without wanting to be touched themselves. No? That’s how it becomes better than self satisfaction, because I think I could enjoy myself a lot more pleasing a woman I think is sexy, a lot more than I can have a wank and get myself off.

Wanking is pointless to me (I still do it) , the same way some say it’s “just sex”. Sex with someone you like is important.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

That’s why I think I’d always want to only share myself with someone I think knows me, would now where to touch me, exploring where is most sensitive, where the most arousal is found.

Wanking is pointless to me (I still do it) , the same way some say it’s “just sex”. Sex with someone you like is important. "

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b."

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Sex can be just sex but it can also be a lot more depending on if you feel a connection to them or not.

It's also essential to live and I reckon I got about 6 months before my body says you've had enough time and you blew it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??"

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

It can be a great number of things even in a relationship I think. Sometimes it's a cuddle that evolves into sex, others you just got to have them there and then.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For outside our relationship me sex is sex, it's just something I enjoy.

With the Mr it's deeper it's intimate, loving and just different.

Mrs "

Absolutely agree 100%

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

I think for me it can be both, but not concurrently.

If I need instant ravishing and gratification then it does indeed boil down to just peripheral sex. However - and more likely - when I'm yearning for something deep, meaningful and with substance then sex just complements the other important 'stuff'.

I don't associate sex as a replacement for "other needs not being met", whatever they may be. I would rather address those needs in their rightful way and not use sex as a 'less suitable' alternative.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking."

Then close your eyes, pucker up and just snog me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though "

Yes and you said we wouldn't mention that again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking.

Then close your eyes, pucker up and just snog me.

You used 2

words.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though

Yes and you said we wouldn't mention that again.

Now everyone knows it was you

I'm sure it was just a coincidence that it happened both times

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking.

Then close your eyes, pucker up and just snog me.

You used 2

words."

I'm sure he meant to say, lay on your stomach, watch the ipad and let me do my thing and I'll leave when I finish without saying anything

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking.

Then close your eyes, pucker up and just snog me.

You used 2

words."

I know.

Snog + Me.

It’s hard to imagine. That’s why I said to close your eyes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though

Yes and you said we wouldn't mention that again.

Now everyone knows it was you

I'm sure it was just a coincidence that it happened both times "

Its not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy and it is a big deal!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though

Yes and you said we wouldn't mention that again.

Now everyone knows it was you

I'm sure it was just a coincidence that it happened both times

Its not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy and it is a big deal!!"

Don't tell me we only have 5 minutes and 45 seconds next time

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *estarossa.Woman
over a year ago

Flagrante

"...just about sex, or is it something deeper?

What I mean is, is it really just sex or is there another need not being met that makes us feel like sex is the answer?

Impossible to say.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lexanderSupertrampMan
over a year ago

Gourock

I think it all depends on your mood at the time and who you are with.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It can definitely just be about sex. As long as there is chemistry and sexual tension, then it is super hot. Doesnt need to be anything deeper.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking."

Talking???

WTAF?

Different kind of oral sex I suppose!!!

Not really one for talking myself - more a silent lover - but fucking deadly!! For me action speaks louder than words and generally speaking a wibbling mess is the end result.

Yes I know it comes across as conceited and full of shit. I actually don't care - so there

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I …….

….

Having to explain to someone what you like and stuff, or switch the wand on?

I'm going option b.

You have to explain?!?!

that explains a lot!

You just said someone that knows you. To know you would involving talking and talking about what you like.

That's too much talking.

Talking???

WTAF?

Different kind of oral sex I suppose!!!

Not really one for talking myself - more a silent lover - but fucking deadly!! For me action speaks louder than words and generally speaking a wibbling mess is the end result.

Yes I know it comes across as conceited and full of shit. I actually don't care - so there

That wasn't really my point.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean, it’s better than a wank innit

Not always.

That's a sad indictment

Why?

Of course

Or maybe I just think I know my body better than anyone else, well I hope I would!

Also I don't have to rely on others for my pleasure, or anything really.

I win yes??

I wish I was as happy to just please myself as you're, you don't know the struggle

I don't have the struggle. Take sex out the equation and life's good.

Life is better with sex, I have only had bad sex on 2 occasions though

Yes and you said we wouldn't mention that again.

Now everyone knows it was you

I'm sure it was just a coincidence that it happened both times

Its not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy and it is a big deal!!"

I knew it!…..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having read through this thread again, I’m going to buy myself a wand.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex with my husband is deeper.

Sex with people off here is just sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oly Fuck Sticks BatmanCouple
over a year ago

here & there

"For outside our relationship me sex is sex, it's just something I enjoy.

With the Mr it's deeper it's intimate, loving and just different.

Mrs "

This is spot on same for us

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For outside our relationship me sex is sex, it's just something I enjoy.

With the Mr it's deeper it's intimate, loving and just different.

Mrs "

F is that you?

Almost word for word what she says!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the person. Many moons ago, sex was just sex to me, it was the only way I could feel close to someone (been to counselling and gone into the why’s etc).

With Hubby, it’s 100% different, it’s loving, whether it’s hard/soft/kink. There’s just something special about it.

We’re all different.

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For outside our relationship me sex is sex, it's just something I enjoy.

With the Mr it's deeper it's intimate, loving and just different.

Mrs

F is that you?

Almost word for word what she says! "

Sorry husband, I was just enjoying a cuppa with KnightsoftheCoffeeTable earlier and must have commented via their profile! Forgive me for not inviting you but it was a.. Ahem.. Ladies meet

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nandwet69Couple
over a year ago

cwmbran

Even though I know sex can just be two people enjoying each others bodies . Enjoying the pleasure that it brings . No need for feeling or emotions .

I don’t need another man , hubby sends me while and can definitely keep up .

Question is that weird . Or have you met other the same .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rMs.NeekCouple
over a year ago

Worcestershire

Entirely depends. Can be anything you want it to be. Can be the physicality of an orgasm with nothing else. Can be about owning and being owned. Can be about the connection. Can just be because.....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That’s a complicated question, and one I spend a lot of time thinking about.

I’ve recently discovered that the main reason that (although I’ve had a lot of sex with many different people) I always feel disconnected and uncomfortable with one night stands is because I’m demisexual. I NEED an emotional connection and trust to enjoy sex.

I don’t need “love” in a romantic sense, but I do need to feel safe and have a level of intimacy with the person.

So for me, yes, sex is more than just sex. It has to be emotionally fulfilling or for me it is empty.

Which is one of (not the only) reason I don’t meet. I can’t imagine anything I want less than one night stands or worthless sex with someone I don’t know.

I’d rather climb the walls in sexual frustration for the rest of my life than have meaningless sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like it had been said, sex will mean different things for different folks.

-Sex can be mechanical and therefore transactional. An orgasm for an orgasm (or several for those with vaginas)

-Sex can be fulfilling or leaving you empty (pun intended for those owners of bollocks)

-Sex can be transcendental

Yet, for the sake of the argument, I’d say that sex is a substitute for intimacy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

I've come to the conclusion a wank is the most satisfying sex ever........ Sod you lot I'm off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread