FabSwingers.com forum: Joke of the day

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why don't vegans moan during sex?

Because they don't want to admit that some meat makes them happy.

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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

"Why don't vegans moan during sex?

Because they don't want to admit that some meat makes them happy."

2 tomatoes running. the one in front said to the other one....ketchup

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone finds Cleopatra attractive…

But that’s how Julius Caesar.

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

I'm glad we have a joke thread tonight, really cheering me up after my experience today.

I paid £400 for a limousine but it didn't come with a driver.

All that money spent and nothing to chauffeur it.

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By *91kMan
over a year ago

Maidstone

What did the nut say as he was chasing the other nut?

I'm a cashew.

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

I saw a dwarf climbing down the wall of a prison. Thought to myself, that's a little condescending.

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By *alvenieMan
over a year ago

Bouncing Between Swindon and Weston

Two fish in a tank, one says to the other, do you know how to drive this thing

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By *yronutMan
over a year ago

St Austell

Two Parrots sitting on a perch……. One say to the other…. ‘Can you smell fish??’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw a dwarf climbing down the wall of a prison. Thought to myself, that's a little condescending.

XX "

I heard that was a psychic dwarf that escaped. So there's a small medium at large.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was going to tell a carpentry joke

But you wooden get it

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Why can't owls mate when it's raining?..

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

... because they're too wet to woo.

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By *isfun2023Couple
over a year ago

wakefield

What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before getting married?

Feyonce

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By *egabristolsCouple
over a year ago

penarth

Do you want to know my opinion of windmills?

Big fan.

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By *issy_named_cTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I was reading a book about anti gravity, and it was impossible to put down

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

Did you hear about the explosion at the French cheese warehouse?

There was nothing left but debris

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

I like the Swiss flag

Which is a big plus

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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago

for a penny

I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange pop.

It was a Fanta sea.

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By *aucasian GhandiMan
over a year ago

from my dad's left nut (Warwick)

What do you call an with no shins

TOE KNEE

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a parrot?

A walkie talkie

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By *exySwitches203Couple
over a year ago

Felixstowe

Two fishes were swimming along a river

One swam into a wall - turned to the other and said….

Dam…

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70?

Because every time she gets to 69 she gets a little frog stuck in her throat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who spent hours lyong awake in bed each night wondering if there really was a dog?

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

What do you say to someone who steals your cheese?

“Hey - that’s nacho cheese!!”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What should you do if you come across a Lion?

Wipe it off and say sorry

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

"What should you do if you come across a Lion?

Wipe it off and say sorry"

First one that made me laugh out loud!! Bravo, sir

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

A man was having premature ejaculation problems so he went to the doctor. The doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself." That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol and ran home to his wife. That night the two were having sex and found themselves in the 69 position. The man felt the urge to ejaculate and fired the starter pistol. The next day he went back to the doctor who asked how it went. The man answered, "Not well. When I fired the pistol, my wife pooped on my face, bit three inches off my penis, and my neighbor came out of the closet with his hands in the air."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A nun was taking a bath when she heard a knock at the door.

'Who is it?' She asked.

'Blind man' came the reply.

So, not feeling the need to cover herself, she opened the door

'Nice tits' said the man, 'where do you want your blinds?'

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "How do you breathe through that tiny thing?"

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