FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Quitting job without another one

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi!

I’m just mulling something over and would be interested to see if anyone else has been where I’m at.

I have had a life changing few months which was sadly triggered by something really traumatic. I have had the breakdown had lots of support from people around me, had a month off sick from work, had therapy , done a load of really hard work on myself and I genuinely feel happier and more confident in myself than I ever have.

I’ve been off sick for a month and been back for two weeks, currently half way through a 2 week holiday I had booked prior to sick time and this is partly why I wnt back when I did.

I really want to continue to look after myself after what has felt like being in a war. I would realistically be ok with my life style not changing for about three months, maybe four or five with making some changes and maybe selling some stuff I genuinely don’t care about

Every cell in my body is telling me I just need a month where I don’t even think about getting another job and I can just sleep and not be around anyone , go to the gym etc.

I’ve spent so much time being honest and communicating and feeling like I’ve been under observation by everyone, I’m just so tired and I feel like as a human not having a job for a bit is what I need, and I’ve never felt like this.

Genuinely not worrying or thinking about the logistics of getting another job or claiming anything etc because I know I would get so bored I would do whatever I needed to do before I ran out of savings,

It just doesn’t feel like a thing people do hmmm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If you can do it...do it!

There is so much more to life than work. I know it's not a thing people do but I suspect that's mostly because they can't afford to and partly because as you say it's just not something people do.

Do it! I say

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

^^ and I apologise for the number of times I wrote 'do'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi!

I’m just mulling something over and would be interested to see if anyone else has been where I’m at.

I have had a life changing few months which was sadly triggered by something really traumatic. I have had the breakdown had lots of support from people around me, had a month off sick from work, had therapy , done a load of really hard work on myself and I genuinely feel happier and more confident in myself than I ever have.

I’ve been off sick for a month and been back for two weeks, currently half way through a 2 week holiday I had booked prior to sick time and this is partly why I wnt back when I did.

I really want to continue to look after myself after what has felt like being in a war. I would realistically be ok with my life style not changing for about three months, maybe four or five with making some changes and maybe selling some stuff I genuinely don’t care about

Every cell in my body is telling me I just need a month where I don’t even think about getting another job and I can just sleep and not be around anyone , go to the gym etc.

I’ve spent so much time being honest and communicating and feeling like I’ve been under observation by everyone, I’m just so tired and I feel like as a human not having a job for a bit is what I need, and I’ve never felt like this.

Genuinely not worrying or thinking about the logistics of getting another job or claiming anything etc because I know I would get so bored I would do whatever I needed to do before I ran out of savings,

It just doesn’t feel like a thing people do hmmm

"

Your last sentence is the nail on the head one. We are all so forced into the mindset of work work work. If you can afford to take time out then bloody well do it!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tephanjMan
over a year ago

Kettering

The best thing to do is go with your gut. I have been in a place where I just gave up my job , with out having another one to go to. I survived and started again. I doubt this has been helpful but good luck with whatever you decide

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have savings and can afford to do it, and finances won’t effect your mental health then just do it.

Mental health should come first.

When applying for your next job if they question an area of non working in your dates just say you where having a career break or went travelling.

Take care

Xxxxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I've resigned without a clear path ahead - TWICE.

Best decisions I ever made.

The biggest changes only happen when there's room for opportunities.

It sounds like you're in need of something different, OP. Go with your gut, and enjoy liberating your future!

C

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hi!

I’m just mulling something over and would be interested to see if anyone else has been where I’m at.

I have had a life changing few months which was sadly triggered by something really traumatic. I have had the breakdown had lots of support from people around me, had a month off sick from work, had therapy , done a load of really hard work on myself and I genuinely feel happier and more confident in myself than I ever have.

I’ve been off sick for a month and been back for two weeks, currently half way through a 2 week holiday I had booked prior to sick time and this is partly why I wnt back when I did.

I really want to continue to look after myself after what has felt like being in a war. I would realistically be ok with my life style not changing for about three months, maybe four or five with making some changes and maybe selling some stuff I genuinely don’t care about

Every cell in my body is telling me I just need a month where I don’t even think about getting another job and I can just sleep and not be around anyone , go to the gym etc.

I’ve spent so much time being honest and communicating and feeling like I’ve been under observation by everyone, I’m just so tired and I feel like as a human not having a job for a bit is what I need, and I’ve never felt like this.

Genuinely not worrying or thinking about the logistics of getting another job or claiming anything etc because I know I would get so bored I would do whatever I needed to do before I ran out of savings,

It just doesn’t feel like a thing people do hmmm

"

Sorry to hear you are having a tough time, sounds like you have been through the mill here and not surprising you need that time out, you will be drained emotionally and physically and need time to fill your cup as it were...

If you can afford to do it why not, take care of yourself so you can give your best to the next employers who I am sure will be lucky to have you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Health before wealth if you can paid the bills in full for a few months without pay

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the time off, quit the job, do what’s necessary for you, we are all replaceable in a work environment and to be honest will we be remembered once we are gone? Maybe but even so no one is more important to you than you, you are told these days to love everyone, there’s little out there to say you should love yourself first, take the time, future self will love you for it x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich

I have recently done exactly what you describe.

I am now starting my new job in a completely new sector. Healing takes a lot of time and energy.

If you feel it’s the right thing to do, it probably is!

I wish you all the best on your path

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *an1978Woman
over a year ago

GONE/TIMEOUT (No DMs please)

Sorry to hear that you are going through this.

If you've not already done so, phone up everyone that you pay bills to, and ask for a payment holiday.

Some will give a bring your bill down, some will give 2 months of not having to pay.

Some Council tax can take the months payment and spread it over the rest of the year. Or if you're paying over 10 months, they can put at the end if they are kind. (so put April payment onto February instead)

First time I felt I had to quit my job in my late teens, I went back to work after 6 weeks.

Second time a decade later I was given leave, and allowed to use some of the following years annual leave so I still had some income.

I guess it all depends on what kind of employer you have.

Third time I had another job to go to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Do what's right for you!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

If you can afford to do it op ,go for it.

Nothing is more important than your health and wellbeing ,we spend far too much time in jobs as it is.

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Hi!

I’m just mulling something over and would be interested to see if anyone else has been where I’m at.

I have had a life changing few months which was sadly triggered by something really traumatic. I have had the breakdown had lots of support from people around me, had a month off sick from work, had therapy , done a load of really hard work on myself and I genuinely feel happier and more confident in myself than I ever have.

I’ve been off sick for a month and been back for two weeks, currently half way through a 2 week holiday I had booked prior to sick time and this is partly why I wnt back when I did.

I really want to continue to look after myself after what has felt like being in a war. I would realistically be ok with my life style not changing for about three months, maybe four or five with making some changes and maybe selling some stuff I genuinely don’t care about

Every cell in my body is telling me I just need a month where I don’t even think about getting another job and I can just sleep and not be around anyone , go to the gym etc.

I’ve spent so much time being honest and communicating and feeling like I’ve been under observation by everyone, I’m just so tired and I feel like as a human not having a job for a bit is what I need, and I’ve never felt like this.

Genuinely not worrying or thinking about the logistics of getting another job or claiming anything etc because I know I would get so bored I would do whatever I needed to do before I ran out of savings,

It just doesn’t feel like a thing people do hmmm

"
if you can afford to do it do it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

Do you want to quit your job or just need time away?

If it’s the latter, ask them for a sabbatical for a month or two. Firstly, you’ll find out if they value you enough to want you to stay, secondly, you won’t then have the stress and hassle of job hunting and interviews when you are ready to work again.

At least if you have a job to return to but don’t want to stay long term, you can look round and change on your own terms and timescale, without the pressure of having to pay bills etc

(I’ve have previously left a very well paid career to sign on and retrain…although that was the 90’s and a very different time to now)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No but the way things are at the moment I am very close to doing it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/03/23 16:19:31]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do you want to quit your job or just need time away?

If it’s the latter, ask them for a sabbatical for a month or two. Firstly, you’ll find out if they value you enough to want you to stay, secondly, you won’t then have the stress and hassle of job hunting and interviews when you are ready to work again.

At least if you have a job to return to but don’t want to stay long term, you can look round and change on your own terms and timescale, without the pressure of having to pay bills etc

(I’ve have previously left a very well paid career to sign on and retrain…although that was the 90’s and a very different time to now)"

I have just had a month off sick paid - been back for two weeks and going back when I have was the right thing for me to do at that time.

I’m now half way though a two week holiday and I’m mntally and physically exhausted - and bare in mind taking into account first absence- and last week which was holiday I have only worked 10 days in the last 6 weeks.

I’m also on holiday next week, I will as a first point of action put another 2 week sick note in some time next week .

Feel like i have had a taste of what recovering from the last 4 months while moving forward and working at the same time will be. It’s done me good but it’s come at a cost and I’m not happy to put myself through that indefinitely.

I won’t get any sick pay after that and things like occupational health and absence management procedures will kick in. They have been amazing upto now but there being limitations on what they can accommodate does not change what I need as a human being and that coming above anything

I can do a lot In a shot space of time and I know what a month or two will do for me and what I need to get to where I want to be. I’m not prepared for that to take another 6 or 12 months d which it would if I keep working and just getting through it and having a shit quality of life in the meantime. After what I’ve been through and what I’ve done lately that prospect feels so wrong I almost feel guilty at the thought of going back and going down that route . It feels like it would be self harm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

A family member did this last year, and it was the best thing they've ever done. They also got a much better job and almost a 100% (!) pay rise.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

For the last two weeks i have felt safe in giving myself the freedom and permission to walk out at any point. - no further pay, no sick pay, no job to go back to. And have managed to get my head around the future logistics which don’t feel scary.

I need a month or two at home and I can’t get away from that

In light of that now i have more or less decided I am not going to be working again - including looking for another job, or even a part time one anywhere until I have had that

I have decided to put another 2 weeks sick note in and I’ll get full pay and after that SSP and I’ll go down that route until either party gets bored and decides to review. I may be offered unpaid time off or severance pay but not banking on these being an eventuality - just want to feel like I’m doing due diligence in case I change my mind

Thanks all! H Xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ob357Man
over a year ago

Oswestry

Best thing I did 10 years ago. Fed up, tired, hated UK and effect on me.

Quit, took 3 weeks to recoup then started looking abroad. 3 weeks later was in the Middle East. Still here now.

Love returning to Uk every other month but couldn’t live there again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly if you can do it then put your health first and take the time .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

I would really love to do this but finances at the moment make it unsafe. I would say as long as you have the back up then do it. You're quality of life is more important than any job

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

Could you ask for a work break so you have a job to return to if needed? Or to give you space & time to find something else if your current job is contributing towards how you are feeling?

Good luck whatever you decide xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Well op, sounds like you are halfway there!!!

You just need to make the jump. Find your groove. Make sure you are financially ready though & in a positive mind space.

I got this idea from a Maria Brophy book. She is also on YouTube. It may or may not help?

She is the wife of Drew Brophy, an artist. He paints like the Californian artists of the 60/70's. Think Grateful Dead album artwork & your nearly there!

She said before she married Drew she went back to his place & whilst she was waiting for him she noticed a typewriter on a table with written typed stuff on it.

She was curious & noticed that he had titled it and put up a list of things he wished to accomplish & achieve . Like being a successful artist by a certain age, married with kids etc.

It will help you to clarify where you are going or want to be. You add to the list. You take out of the list. At 1st it will be a croc of poo but you keep at it updating & looking at it every day. Eventually you will hone it down to exactly what you want/am looking for.

She had a successful career in insurance. Was a manger & earnt a lot of money. She left her job to manage her husband. When she consulted a finance guru he told her not to leave her job but it was too late!!!! He told her to go & beg her job back.

He is now a very successful artist.

In her book she talks about someone in the care industry (America), who has written a very famous book (but doesn't give you the ISBN? Grrrr), about people who are terminally ill who had regrets & wished they had followed their dreams but were not able to for various reasons or just scared to. You know life.... Doubters telling you not to do it.

Yes Op, people do do it. I did & have never looked back since ....

I'm not where I want to be but being as we are all going to be dying on the toilet before we hit 70 at work (like Elvis), with a burger in yer hand, you might as well go & try & do something you have always wanted to do. I have the perfect career plan.

So, I'm going to coffin doge between now & that age. If Picasso can do it to old age.... so can I!

Good luck!!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat

Did it 2 weeks ago and I feel like a massive weight has been lifted. Happened slightly sooner than I expected/planned but hell it feels great. Yes I am going to have to cut back on the 5* hotels and cocktails but I have plans to volunteer, travel and do all the things I want to do rather than sit at a laptop for 12 hours a day. I'd rather live a little before I die than than be the richest woman in the graveyard. If you can - do it! X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like you need to concentrate on you, and focus on you,and look after you.

I left my last job as it was affecting me physically and mentally, and for the first time in my life didn't have another job lined up to go to. It all worked out

Life has a strange way of working itself out eventually, primarily take care of yourself and give yourself a little time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rAitchMan
over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

I walked out of a job in April 2016. The money was good, but it wasn't a nice place to be. I'd sold my house pay the ex off so had enough in the bank to pay my way and not claim anything.

I did take a temporary job for a month covering someone on long term sick, but it was February 2017 when I entered full time work again. It did me the world of good.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you be able to take a sabbatical from your current employer for an agreed period? I hadn't thought of this as an option but when I went to resign it was proposed by my then employer. I was able to take 6 months.

Good luck with whatever you decide x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4bimMan
over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

The key to succeed in the workplace is to not care and workless.

Hard work makes you too valuable for promotion,same with doing lots of overtime management will expect it and others slacken off as your covering them.

So do less. Learn to say no and be polite when saying no.

No explanation needed just no.

You'll get more respect for that than always working hard.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

I've always said if your not happy in your current job or you believe you could be doing something else at a higher level then leaving your job can be a good step as it pushes you to find something else .. no one has ever become successful by staying comfortable .. when it feels uncomfortable and scary that's your time to jump and take a chance if it works it works if it doesn't you'll always get another job ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ong-leggedblondWoman
over a year ago

Next Door

I quit my last job without having another job.

Had been off sick from work, for just over a month. I was suffering from work place stress and anxiety and I got no support from the company.

Handed my notice in, a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders.

I didn't have much saving to help but my MH was more important.

I started a job, less than 6wks after I handed in my notice and I've not looked back. That was 7yrs ago and I'm still working for the company.

It's a tough decision but you gave to do what's best for your health.

Life is too short.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *inkerbell67Woman
over a year ago

Clacton on sea essex

I had a month of after my dad suddenly died ,ihad so many emotions going on and grief, when I came back to work they pilled loads more work on me ,it was to much so phoned up and said I quit, they said I couldn't so I blocked all the numbers. 1 month later I found a job I loved .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top