FabSwingers.com forum: Dating sites ..paying?

By *arctegg OP Man
over a year ago

grays

53 years of age and separated with three young children..I’ve noticed I’ve been on there a long time ! And it seems with POF /tinder /Cupid .. I’m on zero messaged but 100’s of (fake?) likes , that I can’t view I as I have to pay extortionate costs ..

Is paying the only way ?

Or do people still venture out into the real world ?

I’m getting seriously lonely , you can’t beat laying next to someone in morning and evening.. or going places

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I never got the point of viewing to see who liked you.

I got really annoyed at those "Oops you missed a match!" notifications. I didn't miss a match, I wasn't into them, so it wasn't a match.

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By *akeanyoneMan
over a year ago

You don't need to pay. It doesn't matter who has liked you if it's not mutual.

If it is mutual, then you will get a match and can start a chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you know they're fake likes? Is it extortionate if you find the woman of your dreams?

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

I found Bumble ok and Hinge better, both using the free versions. However they’re only as good as the women on there; if you’re close to a city thy work well.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

I'm a single father with a full time job, real world has always been more favourable and you'd be supprised how many people in the real world are in the same position.

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By *arctegg OP Man
over a year ago

grays

"How do you know they're fake likes? Is it extortionate if you find the woman of your dreams? "

I don’t , hence the post .

And no it’s absolutely not extortionate if you find the right one .

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By *arctegg OP Man
over a year ago

grays

"You don't need to pay. It doesn't matter who has liked you if it's not mutual.

If it is mutual, then you will get a match and can start a chat. "

I agree with what you’re saying , but 200 likes in five days? And not one match ? Seems a bit far fetched to me .

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By *akedMMan
over a year ago

Witney

I tried match a while ago not one message did get a couple of likes ,but to far away .really miss someone being there next to you at night and morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I noticed with bumble if you have your normal distance set but the pepole who have matched with you are out of distance, set your range to whole country then the matches are normally within the first few swipes but I totally agree with the 'oh you missed a match' if I didn't like them then I missed nothing. Imagine in person someone walked up to you with a mask on and said I fancy you but you need to pay me and then ill show you who I am.

As a whole I find these apps aren't really designed for dating. Limited likes, pay to reveal, Limited bios, 3 generic dead questions and you just end up comparing people after people. 'What would you do in a zombie apocalypse?' Whatever you've unless the answer is die or become infected then no you're probably not. I hope it's better for someone around your age op but around mind it seems every women is looking for either or a combination of.

To travel more. (Nothing stopping you)

A gym buddy. (You maybe don't go to the gym as much as you wantus to believe as anyone who goes to your gym could be a buddy)

A dog. (I hope someone's standards aren't actually compromised by someone having a pet and how is that all it takes)

A rave partner (do you have no friends that want to rave?)

I have wanted to change my preferences to men to see what the women put up with as if it's similar nonsense then no wonder everyones single or in 'situationships'

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By *uteLittleGeekWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere

"You don't need to pay. It doesn't matter who has liked you if it's not mutual.

If it is mutual, then you will get a match and can start a chat.

I agree with what you’re saying , but 200 likes in five days? And not one match ? Seems a bit far fetched to me .

Don't pay as what is the point checking who liked you. Match will only happen if is mutual.

I would suggest you are better looking for a friend with benefits then a relationship. Ask yourself, do you have time to invest in a relationship and care for children ,do housework, cooking etc ?

Companionship would be what you possible need rather then a full on relationship.

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

A lot of these sites have bots that effectively encourage you to pay, then remarkably they stop when you have. Other sites get you to buy 'credits' in order to be able to contact or reply, again more bots in action to keep you paying. Not tried t*nder as it felt I was the wrong age demographic - mind you that feels the same on any site including (unfortunately) this one too.

I suspect real world and proper conversations, networking etc is probably the best route forward.

But then again I may just be being cynical as most of these sites exist to make money and not really do what's advertised

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"I have wanted to change my preferences to men to see what the women put up with as if it's similar nonsense then no wonder everyones single or in 'situationships' "

From what I’m told, it’s pictures of men holding a massive fish they’ve caught or standing next to an expensive car.

A bit like Fab, the numbers can be daunting but the bar isn’t terribly high

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

"You don't need to pay. It doesn't matter who has liked you if it's not mutual.

If it is mutual, then you will get a match and can start a chat.

I agree with what you’re saying , but 200 likes in five days? And not one match ? Seems a bit far fetched to me .

Don't pay as what is the point checking who liked you. Match will only happen if is mutual.

I would suggest you are better looking for a friend with benefits then a relationship. Ask yourself, do you have time to invest in a relationship and care for children ,do housework, cooking etc ?

Companionship would be what you possible need rather then a full on relationship. "

I agree with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know they're fake likes? Is it extortionate if you find the woman of your dreams? "

They're fake simply because whatever online dating site it is they have people working for them who sent fake likes just to reel people in .

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

They're fake. They pay people to like you and suck you in. Don't bother. Awful experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

HA I find this funny.

When I was a site supported of FAB, I never got a single view.

Since not renewing my support, I receive up to 6 views a day, but I cannot view them till I renew my site support, so FAB is no different.

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By *hrek101Man
over a year ago

Herts

"HA I find this funny.

When I was a site supported of FAB, I never got a single view.

Since not renewing my support, I receive up to 6 views a day, but I cannot view them till I renew my site support, so FAB is no different."

But FAB is cheap as chips

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By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"53 years of age and separated with three young children..I’ve noticed I’ve been on there a long time ! And it seems with POF /tinder /Cupid .. I’m on zero messaged but 100’s of (fake?) likes , that I can’t view I as I have to pay extortionate costs ..

Is paying the only way ?

Or do people still venture out into the real world ?

I’m getting seriously lonely , you can’t beat laying next to someone in morning and evening.. or going places "

I am in similar situation but totally undateable due to lack of time and family circumstances.

I found dating apps useless. Too much fakery.

Going out to the real world, gym, swimming, signing up for local groups (Meetup app is great) and just living in the present is how I do things now. Not really looking for relationship but just being with people makes me feel better. Still miss having someone to pillow talk and cuddle but I believe it will come when you least expect it.

Good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I (Mr) was dating I found the free apps to be a waste of time.

Paid subscription to Match gave much better results and I eventually met Dora.

I still believe that people willing to pay are likely to be more serious.

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By *skyouneverknowMan
over a year ago

Calne

"When I (Mr) was dating I found the free apps to be a waste of time.

Paid subscription to Match gave much better results and I eventually met Dora.

I still believe that people willing to pay are likely to be more serious. "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I found a little hack with Badoo, if you delete your account enough times with in a short time frame, they give you lifetime premium lol.

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

Is paying the only way ?

Or do people still venture out into the real world ?

I’m getting seriously lonely , you can’t beat laying next to someone in morning and evening.. or going places

I am in similar situation but totally undateable due to lack of time and family circumstances.

I found dating apps useless. Too much fakery.

Good luck OP "
. I agree Meetup groups are a good way to start friendships which potentially could develop into a relationship.I am on a couple of local Meetup groups that do simple things like meal at a restaurant, cinema night , tribute bands in pub

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Most of the people that fancy me on them either live outside my search area or it's not mutual. There's really no need to pay to use them at all.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Don't ever pay the dating sites, really not worth it.

Bumble and Hinge are probably the better ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is paying the only way ?

Or do people still venture out into the real world ?

I’m getting seriously lonely , you can’t beat laying next to someone in morning and evening.. or going places

I am in similar situation but totally undateable due to lack of time and family circumstances.

I found dating apps useless. Too much fakery.

Good luck OP . I agree Meetup groups are a good way to start friendships which potentially could develop into a relationship.I am on a couple of local Meetup groups that do simple things like meal at a restaurant, cinema night , tribute bands in pub"

Thanks for the heads up, I have just joined.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find that dating sites actually make me feel worse about myself. I've tried them all over the years and yet to really get anywhere for very long .

I've come to the conclusion that actually the men I get to know through fab are far better than any I've met on a dating site over the years.

(And I say that as someone not really looking for a swinging partner)

Despite the bad rep some guys get on here, I've found them to be more respectful, often more intelligent and certainly far more interesting than those I've met elsewhere.

Friendships are formed and even if nothing happens ,or if it does but doesn't carry on ,I've never once been ghosted by someone from Fab.

I also think people are able to be more honest about their intentions.

Perhaps I'm not insta pretty enough for tinder or too lazy for Bumble and maybe that's why my experience on 'traditional ' sites has been so poor, or maybe being a 39 year old woman leaves you in no man's land because they all want sometihg else .

Whatever it is , I much prefer here and, while I might occasionally swipe ,I certainty wouldn't ever pay for a subscription on those sites.

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By *arctegg OP Man
over a year ago

grays

Some Interesting views . I would never pay I’m too long in the tooth to fall for that I guess . Fab gains zero luck ( age is an issue for meets)

And unfortunately I suffer massive social anxiety ( as in crowds) I’m good one on one . But I suffer incredibly in a group .

I used to go clubs , but could not gain the courage to speak - believe me going there was a huge challenge -

Someone mentioned meet app? This may be a good place for me to start .

Thx is for this

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"How do you know they're fake likes? Is it extortionate if you find the woman of your dreams?

They're fake simply because whatever online dating site it is they have people working for them who sent fake likes just to reel people in ."

It's bots. No humans needed.

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By *laireandAndyCouple
over a year ago

Highlands

"When I (Mr) was dating I found the free apps to be a waste of time.

Paid subscription to Match gave much better results and I eventually met Dora.

I still believe that people willing to pay are likely to be more serious.

This "

Second this.

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By *unfunfun xMan
over a year ago

LONDON

It's Saturday there are amazing bars out there, playing live music karaoke all sorts your be surprised how easy it is to chat with the drink flowing and you just never know, I'm heading to Surrey later not to swingers place but lively bars, but I see you have 3 kids so maybe difficult to get out but keep going fella your strike gold you will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only use the dating app I can’t tell if a women in to me as lack confidence

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