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Advice on how to get over nerves please?

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By *eeds89 OP   Man
over a year ago

Travelodge All Week

So I'm pretty good looking straight guy and straight acting with a GF but I crave more! I enjoy talking to other men and thoughts of doing stuff makes me solid! But when it comes down to actually meeting I always get super nervous. Its like I have a panic attack almost. I think it's because I have a GF and have alot to lose so I keep myself as discreet as possible so don't really send photos which makes it even harder.

Any help and advice people please

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm a bit confused. What's your issue here? You struggle to get meets because you can't send photos or because you're too nervous?

Now I don't care what you do, your moral compass isn't going to be the same as mine. However could the nerves be due to you knowing that it's against your principles to go behind your girlfriends back?

Only you can decide on the way forward but do you want to keep a secret or live a lie for the rest of your life?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

To answer your question nerves are natural. I get over them by just going right ahead and doing whatever is making me nervous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd talk to her. Be honest with youself and her..you may be suprised with her reaction. Often its positive.

You may even feel you no longer have the need to actually do anything when its not a secret.

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

OP nerves is natural when you first meet someone. Good luck

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By *ristinapinkWoman
over a year ago

Staines-upon-Thames

I think you have two different situations here:

You have a girlfriend - maybe sort that one out first. I would suggest you talk to her and let her know what you need

You need more- once you know where she stands, you can start focusing on this one

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you "
Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though! "

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle

[Removed by poster at 24/03/23 13:46:20]

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party "
Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to your GF, you aren't being fair in her or yourself. You can then seek what you want without the guilt, which should ease the nerves a little.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others? "

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair "
Couples play with others so how does that mean they ain't enough? You are on this site. Lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I would have an open conversation with your girlfriend about how you feel about sexuality in general.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair Couples play with others so how does that mean they ain't enough? You are on this site. Lol "

Because they are aware so no guilt and are happy in doing so.... I'm on this site but also single and wouldn't meet someone who is going behind their partners without them knowing I have standard's my ex cheated and know how it feels

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair Couples play with others so how does that mean they ain't enough? You are on this site. Lol

Because they are aware so no guilt and are happy in doing so.... I'm on this site but also single and wouldn't meet someone who is going behind their partners without them knowing I have standard's my ex cheated and know how it feels "
That's not what i said? Couples who play with others mean a lot to eachother. Yet you are calling the OP for exploring his sexuality! I've been cheated on too? Lots of us have standards.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Surely when your gf sees your profile she knows you are looking for men as well as women?

She does know you are on here, right?

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair Couples play with others so how does that mean they ain't enough? You are on this site. Lol

Because they are aware so no guilt and are happy in doing so.... I'm on this site but also single and wouldn't meet someone who is going behind their partners without them knowing I have standard's my ex cheated and know how it feels That's not what i said? Couples who play with others mean a lot to eachother. Yet you are calling the OP for exploring his sexuality! I've been cheated on too? Lots of us have standards. "

Yes and they do it because they are comfortable in doing so and still have the love for each other as they are exploring together which means a lot and still keeps relationship values

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By *hroatQueen_CATV/TS
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Hi op

Best way talk to your gf so she can understand how you feel as you can't say you love her if she isn't enough for you Snidey! Does that apply to couples who play with others too? He is maybe exploring his sexuality. OP you do need to talk to your girlfriend though!

It would be a sensible approach especially if you still want to cling on to the relationship that apparently means a lot. Is it fair on the other party Relationships mean a lot to couples who play with others?

Still a huge gamble but is it worth it is it fair Couples play with others so how does that mean they ain't enough? You are on this site. Lol

Because they are aware so no guilt and are happy in doing so.... I'm on this site but also single and wouldn't meet someone who is going behind their partners without them knowing I have standard's my ex cheated and know how it feels That's not what i said? Couples who play with others mean a lot to eachother. Yet you are calling the OP for exploring his sexuality! I've been cheated on too? Lots of us have standards.

Yes and they do it because they are comfortable in doing so and still have the love for each other as they are exploring together which means a lot and still keeps relationship values "

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

The mind plays the big part in nerves if you're cheating on your girlfriend then thats probably the reason for your lack of erection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to your gf and accept that she may not be up for the idea of her man shagging a guy.

Fuck about behind her back and lose her when she finds out or be racked with guilt for cheating on her.

Those are your options.

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