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"I love easily. There are people I don't even know that well, but the way they are makes me drawn to them. I find genuine joy in seeing them experience things that make them happy. Just seeing them have a real smile completely fills my heart. But I don't need it to be any more than that. I like to bask in the things that make me happy rather than pull apart the reasons why or push for more and ruin what there actually is. I don't know if it really counts as smitten. But it'll do for me " So much so that they dodge a hard no preference? I'm a weird one Meli! Like I said to you the other day, I am quite selective in making connections but those connections I do attach to I would say can often be quite smitten with. (no! I don't want to marry you and love happily forever, nor always been around you) | |||
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"So much so that they dodge a hard no preference? " I've moved it to the almost never list just for you | |||
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"I was talking to a friend earlier about the state of being smitten - how we can become smitten with someone quite quickly, both possessing that incurable romantic soul. So - do you find that you can become smitten with someone quite quickly? Is it a sensation you enjoy? Or do you compartmentalise more? It doesn't have to be solely about people on here - it might be a supermarket assistant who smiled at you in a kind way. A hairdresser who gives you the perfect head massage. " I think 95% of the time no, walls are up and impenetrable but then the odd one somehow manages to get through and takes me by surprise a little, it happens very quickly. Definitely not with hairdressers and checkout girls - unless they give me a free cadburys boost! | |||
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"I used to be like that. These days I am bitter and jaded and appreciate the moments instead of wanting more " I'm sure you're not bitter and jaded. I don't think being smitten means you necessarily want more. You can enjoy that feeling for what it is, without wanting to change anything/get married etc. | |||
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"I'm smitten. But its unrequited. Situation normal. " Why is it unrequited, Jennie? | |||
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"*engage sensible conversation haha. There’s a certain actresses voice I’m smitten with. Also a male singers voice. People? Yeh, maybe. I’d say it corresponds with the attention and kindness flowing both ways. Do I get a really good vibe from them and how much I think they are enjoying mine. Also, is there something cute about them? (Last bit sounds weird, but I know what I mean )" I managed to engage you in sensible conversation? What a win. I understand that, it's hard for it to blossom when it's not reciprocated isn't it? You need that mutual exchange of energy, else it's a crush. Nothing more. If I think someone likes me, adores my attention, messages etc, I'm probably a little smit already. And no. Cute I get. When you find their little quirks cute, it's like... yep, you're smitten. | |||
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"I'm smitten. But its unrequited. Situation normal. Why is it unrequited, Jennie?" Cos. I'm too niche | |||
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"Used to succomb to smitten feelings quite readily, but tend to give my head a wobble and think 'nah Bettie, leave it'. Being smitten would invariably turn me into a giddy lovestruck loon so now I keep things in check " Leave it Bettie, he’s not worth it | |||
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"*engage sensible conversation haha. ….. I managed to engage you in sensible conversation? What a win. ……. And no. Cute I get. When you find their little quirks cute, it's like... yep, you're smitten." Yes. This right there. Because you want to see or hear more of it! And when you do it’s a little bit of gorgeousness in our lives. | |||
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"I love easily." As usual, Prey took the words right out of my soul and spaffed them casually across the screen. Which saves me repeating her, I suppose. Maybe ‘I love easily’ sounds dramatic for a swingers forum, but it’s true. I take love as a broad spectrum. And it can hold a lot of people. I love my job. I love my wife. I love going down on women. I love all sorts of people and things and experiences in a whole bunch of different ways and intensities. And part of that is accepting that I fall a little bit in love with people all the damn time. That’s part of what makes me, me. And I wouldn’t change it. I know that’s not how everyone’s brain (or heart) works. Some put love on a pedestal and reserve it for ‘true love’ or for ‘romantic love’ or for any one of a number of different definitions. But for me, that feeling of being smitten with somebody - of feeling the fizz and thrill of infatuation and possibility every time they look you in the eye, or send you a message - that’s *living*. It’s the best thing. | |||
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"As usual, Prey took the words right out of my soul and spaffed them casually across the screen." That sounds like a terrible waste of spaff I worry when I say things like that that it comes across wrong. I only say the L word aloud to one person with whom I don’t have a sexual relationship, because hearing it makes me deeply uncomfortable. But it's what I feel, often and for all of the people that matter to me. For those people, I wouldn't even say it's not true or romantic. Perhaps not so much in the traditional sense with all the strings and possessiveness and ugly emotions that seem to come along with that. But still true. Still for as much as romance means to me. Smitten is undoubtedly more appropriate a term for those who I never get to know, but just seeing them around makes me happy. | |||
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"That sounds like a terrible waste of spaff " Oh, you. | |||
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"I was talking to a friend earlier about the state of being smitten - how we can become smitten with someone quite quickly, both possessing that incurable romantic soul. So - do you find that you can become smitten with someone quite quickly? Is it a sensation you enjoy? Or do you compartmentalise more? It doesn't have to be solely about people on here - it might be a supermarket assistant who smiled at you in a kind way. A hairdresser who gives you the perfect head massage. " Ohhh this post is adorable. I get the smits real bad when someone has a proper interest in something, no matter what it is, if they really nerd out about it, I'm totally smitten, like when they really light up if they're talking about said subject. I equally wanna bang em, smooch em, and coochie coo em. Rollercoaster I'm willing to ride, time and time again. It's good to feel cute about someone. | |||
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"This thread. Honestly. It has people all a-flutter trying to describe the feelings. Heady. An upward spiral. Sparks. Hope. Tingles and fizzes. And even an honest-to-god DH Lawrence recitation. Beautiful." It is. Meli brings the good stuff, and Forumites bring the most thought-provoking receipts. | |||
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"Up until this week I'd have said no, but I've met someone who has completely turned my head. " I love this for you! Long may the butterflies flutter, the eyes shine, and the lips part in the wake of True Smittenhood. | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. " LIES | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES" Wow! | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES" Fucking hell NipNips. Finnnnnnne, I'll reply to each and every post. Public humiliation means I need to now. The shame. | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES Fucking hell NipNips. Finnnnnnne, I'll reply to each and every post. Public humiliation means I need to now. The shame." I'm sure everyone will be fine but that little exchange made me laugh so much, it's genuinely made my evening | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES Fucking hell NipNips. Finnnnnnne, I'll reply to each and every post. Public humiliation means I need to now. The shame. I'm sure everyone will be fine but that little exchange made me laugh so much, it's genuinely made my evening " I’ve just been to my kitchen to find any out of date vegetables to throw at naked _eli walking through the streets. I’ve had to settle for tomatoes. They’re tinned though. | |||
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"I love easily. There are people I don't even know that well, but the way they are makes me drawn to them. I find genuine joy in seeing them experience things that make them happy. Just seeing them have a real smile completely fills my heart. But I don't need it to be any more than that. I like to bask in the things that make me happy rather than pull apart the reasons why or push for more and ruin what there actually is. I don't know if it really counts as smitten. But it'll do for me " Oh that's beautiful! There's a song I adore about the easy way of falling for someone new. I quite like smitten without the expectation of more. Without worrying or concerns about others. Just enjoying each other. In an ideal world I'd stay at the smitten stage forever. Sometimes I think it's me, I'm the problem. | |||
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"Yes it happens to me, I actually quite fancy a couple of local ladies that work behind the tills but I'll never tell them that because I don't want it to get awkward when I go shopping " Never tell them! Bask in having a crush. I'm a bit smitten with a barista. She's always so cool and funny and gives me free marshmallows in a separate cup. Easy way to my heart. | |||
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"Yes it happens to me, I actually quite fancy a couple of local ladies that work behind the tills but I'll never tell them that because I don't want it to get awkward when I go shopping Never tell them! Bask in having a crush. I'm a bit smitten with a barista. She's always so cool and funny and gives me free marshmallows in a separate cup. Easy way to my heart. " (Adds marshmallows to shopping lists.) | |||
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"I do, and I welcome that feeling mostly, although sometimes they feature too highly in my thoughts and I have to have a word with myself They come along infrequently though. When I was in my teens, I remember my Mum laughing at me after the millionth time I mentioned something cute the kids I babysat for did. I just loved looking after them so much, we had a ball, making cakes, reading stories, building forts and playing. More recently, someone I worked with - I found him brilliant and maddening all at once. Highly intelligent, hugely lazy. He could walk into any meeting and ask a question that threw the ‘expert’. He was married, and even if he wasn’t I would never have wanted anything to happen with him, but I loved every moment of being around him. Some people invigorate you. What about you, Meli? " Hello Red. People do invigorate you don't they? I think it's like a little spark, sometimes you find that and it's just electrifying. Intoxicating. It's lovely reading your smitten anecdotes. So me? Yes, I do. I'm trying to manage it a bit better now, kind of failing on one front because I'm a teeny bit smitten with him. Our conversations stimulate, challenge me. I like the randomness, the bursts of energy, the changes from mythos to music, gastronomy to garlic. I think that if there's a part of me that's in awe, that takes delight in who they are I'm a bit smitten. But, I do it easily. I don't love easily. I can love someone a little bit but it never flourishes fully. But being smitten? I could do that within a first meet. I'm trying not to. Repeating that as a reminder to myself. | |||
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"Last time I truly felt like that was a guy I used to chat to on the way to work as we got the same train. That was back in 2016. I have minor crushes, but nothing that has a meaningful impact. I find that warm fuzzy sensation grows over time - as a rule it doesn't strike me with someone I don't know well." Yes, the fuzziness does grow doesn't it? I've found that the longer I know someone, the more that fuzzy comes rushing through. | |||
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"I've never been easily smitten with anyone, I don't think I've ever been smitten with anyone prior to the Mr, do I like it - kind of but it's strange, even now years later still smitten and still freaked out slightly by it, it's new it's good but it's strange, I've never been a touchy feely type but with him I am, definitely never been romantic or that affectionate really but with him I am. It's all very odd, in a good way. Mrs " I don't think it sounds odd. I think you've found your lobster. The right people bring out that side of us, the one who is happy to be affectionate and intimate, to the point where it takes us by surprise. | |||
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"I love easily. There are people I don't even know that well, but the way they are makes me drawn to them. I find genuine joy in seeing them experience things that make them happy. Just seeing them have a real smile completely fills my heart. But I don't need it to be any more than that. I like to bask in the things that make me happy rather than pull apart the reasons why or push for more and ruin what there actually is. I don't know if it really counts as smitten. But it'll do for me So much so that they dodge a hard no preference? I'm a weird one Meli! Like I said to you the other day, I am quite selective in making connections but those connections I do attach to I would say can often be quite smitten with. (no! I don't want to marry you and love happily forever, nor always been around you) " Yes, there's such a difference between being smitten and it being an eternal promise. Feelings are wonderful things and I don't think they should be shied away from. Bar the negative, let's not weaponise those. | |||
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"I was talking to a friend earlier about the state of being smitten - how we can become smitten with someone quite quickly, both possessing that incurable romantic soul. So - do you find that you can become smitten with someone quite quickly? Is it a sensation you enjoy? Or do you compartmentalise more? It doesn't have to be solely about people on here - it might be a supermarket assistant who smiled at you in a kind way. A hairdresser who gives you the perfect head massage. I think 95% of the time no, walls are up and impenetrable but then the odd one somehow manages to get through and takes me by surprise a little, it happens very quickly. Definitely not with hairdressers and checkout girls - unless they give me a free cadburys boost! " You softie. It doesn't take me by surprise, you've got that element to you. Can almost predict it. Maybe it's more... it's unplanned. Organic. It happens and then you see yourself falling for someone quickly. Cadbury's Boost are forever linked to you. Shame. | |||
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"Can't ever remember being smitten by anyone. About 4 years ago a neighbour cracked me a wonderful smile and it made me feel all nice but that's it" Ah Diamond. I don't think we all experience smitten. Sometimes a nice feeling is more than enough. Finding little happy moments rather than being the main actor in a biopic. | |||
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"Pretty easily at times. I wear my heart on the outside and it rules me way more than my mind does. I'm also very empathic and as such when I feel I'm making someone happy or getting the same in return it can be intoxicating. It makes me want even more. The downside is that I'm a big softie and a sensitive soul. I feel deeply good and bad. There have been times I wish I didn't but I also wouldn't really want to change. " Oh Wyld. I see a lot of myself in your beautifully written post. Except I do wish I could change. Feeling deeply is draining. It's not something I can switch off. I'd love to one day learn the cheat code. | |||
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"I'm smitten. But its unrequited. Situation normal. " Hope you're okay Jennie. | |||
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" And no. Cute I get. When you find their little quirks…, it's like... yep, you're smitten. Yes. This right there. Because you want to see or hear more of it! And when you do it’s a little bit of gorgeousness in our lives. " Yes! This last bit! E | |||
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"Very rare these days x" Why is it rare for you nowadays Candy? x | |||
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"Used to succomb to smitten feelings quite readily, but tend to give my head a wobble and think 'nah Bettie, leave it'. Being smitten would invariably turn me into a giddy lovestruck loon so now I keep things in check " Lovestruck loon is the worst. How do you keep it in check? I go with smitten. Well my heart does. Like a soft squidgy daft thing. Don't you ever want to go with it? | |||
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"Not really. It doesn’t happen in a very long time. I would say a firm admirer of a few people. Nothing weird, of course. " Admirer is good - not sure how it would be weird. There's so much to admire about people, whatever your dynamic with them. | |||
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"Sometimes someone so very special comes along in your life and you get drawn to them and get utterly smitten. I’ve just learnt to deal with it now as it happens so frequently to me and I’m good at letting them down gently… " It's a hard life being such studmuffins isn't it? The real killer is the modesty that goes with it. | |||
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"I love easily. As usual, Prey took the words right out of my soul and spaffed them casually across the screen. Which saves me repeating her, I suppose. Maybe ‘I love easily’ sounds dramatic for a swingers forum, but it’s true. I take love as a broad spectrum. And it can hold a lot of people. I love my job. I love my wife. I love going down on women. I love all sorts of people and things and experiences in a whole bunch of different ways and intensities. And part of that is accepting that I fall a little bit in love with people all the damn time. That’s part of what makes me, me. And I wouldn’t change it. I know that’s not how everyone’s brain (or heart) works. Some put love on a pedestal and reserve it for ‘true love’ or for ‘romantic love’ or for any one of a number of different definitions. But for me, that feeling of being smitten with somebody - of feeling the fizz and thrill of infatuation and possibility every time they look you in the eye, or send you a message - that’s *living*. It’s the best thing." I think declaring "I love easily" is rather endearing - a positive trait to have. We do tend to think of love as being a more Hollywood version don't we? But I love a lot of people (okay, friends) for a myriad of reasons. I'm very much with you - I live for that rush. I think I'm rather addicted to it when can lead to silly decisions occasionally. But it's good to go with it, embrace it and live well and truly. | |||
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"Very few things get me smitten Dogs are up there - I can't walk past one without a coochy coo moment As for people, I am a bit too cynical of humankind to fall into a state of smitten" You're not cynical Bussy. Dogs are adorable, I was chatting to a man with an adorable dalmatian on a train yesterday. Anyway, some of us aren't daft enough to be smitten with the first person who lights us up. I'm cursed/blessed with it, you're blessed without it. | |||
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"I don’t think I’ve been smitten for years. As I’ve got older my idyllic sense of romance has been replaced by a sense of cautionary cynicism. Quite annoying really. " Romance still exists, I'm a great believer in that. Maybe you're not cynical, more pragmatic in your approach to life x | |||
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"I get smitten with people very easily , even with friends I just love being with them " Aww Peach, that's adorable! I love spending time with people too, you can be platonically smitten with someone. I'm sure of it anyway. | |||
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"Pretty easily at times. I wear my heart on the outside and it rules me way more than my mind does. I'm also very empathic and as such when I feel I'm making someone happy or getting the same in return it can be intoxicating. It makes me want even more. The downside is that I'm a big softie and a sensitive soul. I feel deeply good and bad. There have been times I wish I didn't but I also wouldn't really want to change. Oh Wyld. I see a lot of myself in your beautifully written post. Except I do wish I could change. Feeling deeply is draining. It's not something I can switch off. I'd love to one day learn the cheat code. " I think we are often very similar in how we see things x | |||
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"I don’t think I’ve been smitten for years. As I’ve got older my idyllic sense of romance has been replaced by a sense of cautionary cynicism. Quite annoying really. Romance still exists, I'm a great believer in that. Maybe you're not cynical, more pragmatic in your approach to life x" Romance still exists...but I think for example from me ...it probably expresses itself in a very non traditional way. | |||
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"NipNips out " I hope you realise that NipNips is sticking. It’s a *good* nickname. | |||
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" Meli has atoned. My work here is done. NipNips out " I had to atone. No bleedin' other choice after such a cruel abatement. You're forgiven though. Love ya NipNips. P.S I will do the others. | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES Fucking hell NipNips. Finnnnnnne, I'll reply to each and every post. Public humiliation means I need to now. The shame. I'm sure everyone will be fine but that little exchange made me laugh so much, it's genuinely made my evening " Happy to be of service | |||
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"Oh you lovely people. I'll reply properly to posts in the morning, I love conversations that inspire thoughts and such lovely posts. LIES Fucking hell NipNips. Finnnnnnne, I'll reply to each and every post. Public humiliation means I need to now. The shame. I'm sure everyone will be fine but that little exchange made me laugh so much, it's genuinely made my evening I’ve just been to my kitchen to find any out of date vegetables to throw at naked _eli walking through the streets. I’ve had to settle for tomatoes. They’re tinned though." That should work fine, nice and squelchy. | |||
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