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"How long do you wait between arrangements? I see some same day / next day / same week Veris posted and it always makes me think the interactions must be very superficial. Are they less worthwhile because of the high turnover? For me they would be less enjoyable, I'd not ever choose this myself. If I was one of the many notches I'd feel used and disposable. Personally I have zero expectation of exclusivity on FAB but I need openness, 100% honesty to trust and be intimate even in a casual arrangement. If I know someone has had a meet and I know the who etc it can take a while (possibly weeks) to process their/our 3rd party contact before I'd consider to melting them myself. The ick-factor is real. Is there a fab code of conduct? Optimal M.O. ? Good form? Bad form? Am I an OCD oddity?" do you melt them because of the extra meets as a punishment? | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting " I like this analogy. Someone once explained swinging to me as... You love homecooked food and are perfect happy with it but every so often you fancy a takeaway. | |||
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"Just not like I’m a random forgettable stranger on their syphillitic conveyor belt of despair." Oh I'm stealing that phrase, I love it! | |||
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"I don’t give it much thought if I’m honest. I think the only thing that would bother me a bit would be meeting someone else immediately after on the same day. " I would agree with Shiv. Its up to them what do they do and dont think about it.. but if it was right after or same day.. i would be like ... oh okay | |||
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" For me they would be less enjoyable, I'd not ever choose this myself. If I was one of the many notches I'd feel used and disposable. Personally I have zero expectation of exclusivity on FAB but I need openness, 100% honesty to trust and be intimate even in a casual arrangement. If I know someone has had a meet and I know the who etc it can take a while (possibly weeks) to process their/our 3rd party contact before I'd consider to melting them myself. The ick-factor is real. " This is so me OP | |||
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"Earlier this year I was contacted by a couple who seemed very nice - chatty and friendly. I arranged to meet them for a social (not a ‘social’). The day before, I looked at their profile and saw they were advertising for another social AND an additional full meet with anyone they’d met previously, on the same day as meeting me! I had no desire to turn our social into more and I certainly don’t need to feel special on fab. Just not like I’m a random forgettable stranger on their syphillitic conveyor belt of despair." See this would bother me. I’d have cancelled the social. If I’m going to meet someone I want their undivided attention and if they were planning to meet someone else the same day I feel like the whole meet would feel rushed to head to the next one. | |||
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"Also, people veri at different points. Some people may wait a week to veri someone whereas others may do same day veris. It’s not always decisive to when a person met." Yep, this is very true | |||
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"Am I an OCD oddity?" Out of your list, I would say the one above. With Veris, you might have some idea of who they've met, and depending on the content of the Veri, what they've done. But meet anyone outside of Fab and you run the same risks but without the prior knowledge. Do we ever truly know whether we are something special or just another notch when we meet someone for casual sex? I'd happily take part in a Gangbang, so being put off when they met someone the day before would be a bit weird to my thinking. Gbat | |||
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"Personally it's only partly the crossover of sexual contact being too 'fresh' But also, even though it's not a relationship/romance, I want to be their sole focus for as long as the planning and meeting lasts. So, if they have been with or are planning to get with another, how much of their focus would I have... Would they be texting another outside the hotel or straight after? Would they be running logistics in their head for the next meet? To hell with that. If you're with me and making plans I want 100% attention & flirting in the run up. The days beforehand set the scene for me and the build up of arousal, definitely the foreplay starts well in advance of the meeting day." That is well put... what is too fresh ? How do they adjust their time.. do they have an alarm set? | |||
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"do you melt them because of the extra meets as a punishment? " Oh melting is for rewarding not punishment Hot wax and a hotter me.... | |||
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"I don’t give it much thought if I’m honest. I think the only thing that would bother me a bit would be meeting someone else immediately after on the same day. I would agree with Shiv. Its up to them what do they do and dont think about it.. but if it was right after or same day.. i would be like ... oh okay" see for me , when I did meet outside clubs.. the better the meet.. the more I'd want someone ASAP after... I quite often used to go meet someone, then go to a club after. It would be no slight against who I met. I'm just insatiable and the more I get.. the more I want | |||
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"And I don’t think for a second you are an OCD oddity, OP. " | |||
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"Am I an OCD oddity?" I don’t think so, but even if you are … just own that. Be odd. "How long do you wait between arrangements?" It varies, for so many reasons. Some meets are social. It’d feel weird to say that I wouldn’t go chat over coffee because I chatted with someone else over pints the night before. Some meets are *very* social. Literally going to an organised meet-up. Maybe I want a one-to-one the next day with someone I met there? Sometimes I’m visiting a different city and I want to catch up with more than one person from Fab while I’m in town. Making the most of a trip. But yeah, there are times it feel like something more has happened. Meeting someone and making a different sort of connection. And maybe then I wouldn’t want to see anyone else for a while. Variety is one of the things about Fab, for me. It ain’t just about one thing. For some people it *is* just about one thing, so they can give a straight answer to threads like this one. | |||
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"I don’t give it much thought if I’m honest. I think the only thing that would bother me a bit would be meeting someone else immediately after on the same day. I would agree with Shiv. Its up to them what do they do and dont think about it.. but if it was right after or same day.. i would be like ... oh okay see for me , when I did meet outside clubs.. the better the meet.. the more I'd want someone ASAP after... I quite often used to go meet someone, then go to a club after. It would be no slight against who I met. I'm just insatiable and the more I get.. the more I want " I do think everyone should be entitled to meet who they want and as often as they want to. Just for me personally I’d feel a bit like I wasn’t good enough that they had to go and meet someone else straight after but I do understand where you’re coming from. | |||
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"Argh. There’s a typo in my post up there and it’s annoying me. Mortal shame. But I think I’m going to leave it, rather than delete and repost." You won’t sleep! | |||
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"Perhaps it's because when I meet it's a long one not a quickie and because I give 100% of myself to it I am fully drained emotionally afterwards. It doesn't have to be a romantic thing to engage your feelings in sex, I like it as it enhances my pleasure. Riding the high of cumming at the hands of one guy.... to then pull my head out of that experience, to put guy #1 out of my head, refocus on guy#2, build my energy back and become aroused for guy#2.... jeez I'm exhausted just contemplating the mental physical and emotional gymnastics there. But that's the kind of sex I enjoy. I get that not all fabbers throw their whole selves in to it." So much this | |||
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"Personally it's only partly the crossover of sexual contact being too 'fresh' But also, even though it's not a relationship/romance, I want to be their sole focus for as long as the planning and meeting lasts. So, if they have been with or are planning to get with another, how much of their focus would I have... Would they be texting another outside the hotel or straight after? Would they be running logistics in their head for the next meet? To hell with that. If you're with me and making plans I want 100% attention & flirting in the run up. The days beforehand set the scene for me and the build up of arousal, definitely the foreplay starts well in advance of the meeting day. That is well put... what is too fresh ? How do they adjust their time.. do they have an alarm set? " And most importantly - have they shower | |||
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" That is well put... what is too fresh ? How do they adjust their time.. do they have an alarm set? And most importantly - have they shower " Well I'd never knowingly be a 'sameday girl' but also, would they have enough left in the tank to meet my needs.... | |||
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"If I'm planning to meet someone, I'll try not to have sex before then even if other offers come up. Those plans could be 2 or 3 weeks away but it doesn't feel right or fair to them if I'm putting my dick here, there and everywhere if I had already had plans with them. I don't expect everyone to act like this, of course, but ultimately it's what makes me feel comfortable " I love this | |||
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"Do what makes you feel good - verifications aren't always published on the day they were written anyway so they're not a good yardstick for how active someone is sexually. Also, the vast majority of my interactions are nothing to do with this website so if you're using verifications as a way to see how often people are having sex, it's not a very scientific approach." The veris themselves weren't my focus. | |||
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"I don’t give it much thought if I’m honest. I think the only thing that would bother me a bit would be meeting someone else immediately after on the same day. I would agree with Shiv. Its up to them what do they do and dont think about it.. but if it was right after or same day.. i would be like ... oh okay see for me , when I did meet outside clubs.. the better the meet.. the more I'd want someone ASAP after... I quite often used to go meet someone, then go to a club after. It would be no slight against who I met. I'm just insatiable and the more I get.. the more I want " Fair do, everyone is different and glad it works for you and made you happy For me more it would be feeling if maybe I missed something or my company wasn't good enough and make me think maybe i was the 2nd meet of the day. | |||
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"Do what makes you feel good - verifications aren't always published on the day they were written anyway so they're not a good yardstick for how active someone is sexually. Also, the vast majority of my interactions are nothing to do with this website so if you're using verifications as a way to see how often people are having sex, it's not a very scientific approach. The veris themselves weren't my focus. " Your focus appears to be on the frequency of someone having sex. My point was that just because they have a verification on that day, it doesn't mean the interaction happened on that day. One of mine was from about 3 years earlier! Are you saying it was the content of the verifications that put you off? Or merely the frequency/ti_eline? | |||
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" I get that not all fabbers throw their whole selves in to it." But some do. As for myself, yet to determine whether it’s a good thing or a bad thing to do. | |||
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"Do what makes you feel good - verifications aren't always published on the day they were written anyway so they're not a good yardstick for how active someone is sexually. Also, the vast majority of my interactions are nothing to do with this website so if you're using verifications as a way to see how often people are having sex, it's not a very scientific approach. The veris themselves weren't my focus. " I agree with veris, and they dates can be somehow misleading... You can have few veris on the same day but you met people at different day/weeks/months | |||
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" Fair do, everyone is different and glad it works for you and made you happy For me more it would be feeling if maybe I missed something or my company wasn't good enough and make me think maybe i was the 2nd meet of the day. " Being happy with same day or closely timed meets definitely seems to depend on which appetite(s) are being fed by meeting. Solely social / physical / sexual / emotional or a combination. On my OP I was meaning sex meets not socials but the socials would draw focus away too so I wouldn't appreciate that happening either myself. I'm greedy for focus around a meet it seems or at the very least you'd need to match mine. | |||
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" Fair do, everyone is different and glad it works for you and made you happy For me more it would be feeling if maybe I missed something or my company wasn't good enough and make me think maybe i was the 2nd meet of the day. Being happy with same day or closely timed meets definitely seems to depend on which appetite(s) are being fed by meeting. Solely social / physical / sexual / emotional or a combination. On my OP I was meaning sex meets not socials but the socials would draw focus away too so I wouldn't appreciate that happening either myself. I'm greedy for focus around a meet it seems or at the very least you'd need to match mine." I totally get it and agree, mine was reffering to both to be honest. I 100% wouldn't want to be a 2nd meet of a day or if they were rushing to meet someone right after meeting me, in my own personal view, I am not sure if I would be happy. | |||
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" Are you saying it was the content of the verifications that put you off? Or merely the frequency/ti_eline? " Veris aren't my question at all. That's a whole other thread. I know they get posted randomly. If you know of your prospective partner having other meets, the actual confirmed who/when is it an issue for you if too soon before or after. And what do you consider good form as your own fab way to arrange meets. | |||
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"How long do you wait between arrangements? I see some same day / next day / same week Veris posted and it always makes me think the interactions must be very superficial. Are they less worthwhile because of the high turnover? For me they would be less enjoyable, I'd not ever choose this myself. If I was one of the many notches I'd feel used and disposable. Personally I have zero expectation of exclusivity on FAB but I need openness, 100% honesty to trust and be intimate even in a casual arrangement. If I know someone has had a meet and I know the who etc it can take a while (possibly weeks) to process their/our 3rd party contact before I'd consider to melting them myself. The ick-factor is real. Is there a fab code of conduct? Optimal M.O. ? Good form? Bad form? Am I an OCD oddity?" Yeah it's very odd, it's only because you see it on here. You might of met a guy off another thing and he slept with somebody else in-between you aswell. You just didn't know. It's going to happen on a site of this nature, you have no control of what others do. | |||
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"do you melt them because of the extra meets as a punishment? Oh melting is for rewarding not punishment Hot wax and a hotter me...." lol ok i guess so | |||
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"Having multiple fwb's and differing timescales does mean that sometimes free time to play, does appear in the same week. It doesn't take away from any of our relationships and the focus will always be on the person we are with at the time. I definitely don't have the energy to meet more than once a day though " Long-term and regular arrangements would have a different feel about them to me. Not a first choice but less of/none of the disposable feel about them for sure. | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting " This for me too. I think if someone arranged a meet the night after they’d had me, I’d feel a bit inadequate sexually. I mean they should still be walking like John Wayne for at least a week after I’ve finished with them! | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting This for me too. I think if someone arranged a meet the night after they’d had me, I’d feel a bit inadequate sexually. I mean they should still be walking like John Wayne for at least a week after I’ve finished with them! " Exactly | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting This for me too. I think if someone arranged a meet the night after they’d had me, I’d feel a bit inadequate sexually. I mean they should still be walking like John Wayne for at least a week after I’ve finished with them! " Do you attack them with a bat? | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting This for me too. I think if someone arranged a meet the night after they’d had me, I’d feel a bit inadequate sexually. I mean they should still be walking like John Wayne for at least a week after I’ve finished with them! Do you attack them with a bat? " No I drain their balls so much they shrivel up and become prune like and, I imagine, quite sore to walk with | |||
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"I think it very much depends on your approach to sex. Is it a pleasurable activity similar to eating good food, it might be cooked by a different chef each day but you have no less respect for them because of that. Or is it an experience that you want to feel special to just the people involved, more like a mini relationship experience? I also think the attitude of the people we meet has a lot to do with how I feel about frequencyof meeting This for me too. I think if someone arranged a meet the night after they’d had me, I’d feel a bit inadequate sexually. I mean they should still be walking like John Wayne for at least a week after I’ve finished with them! Do you attack them with a bat? No I drain their balls so much they shrivel up and become prune like and, I imagine, quite sore to walk with " It's funny you should mention that as I was just saying earlier about balls going like dried grapes after too much sex | |||
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" Goodness me why can't people let a person breathe and live their life to suit them. Live for your own expectations We are in no position in someone's life to tell them how to live. As adults we make choices to suit our personality characters and lifestyle as adults no one should be frowning upon how anyone chooses to live their life as long as your not turning a blind eye to someone harming themselves. The moment you care what others think ITS NO LONGER your own life, it becomes theirs and people need to drop soooo many expectations because it only brings disappointments most of the time instead of pleasant surprises " Disappointment only comes with expectations. Some of these women just get a shock when a man moves on after having sex with them. It's an ego thing. Why they are very cautious to give the sex away, it's the only power they have. | |||
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