FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Are you an only child?

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

No. And am grateful for my siblings and glad I have them.

You'll have to pop out some more lemon

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I'm not, I have 1 brother. So I can't comment on what it's like.

And despite us being very friendly and acknowledge as brothers and family we never have been close. We are very different people, always have been. Totally different interests as kids.

That doesn't really answer anything but it's sort of a either way single child or sibling, neither is not really the be all and end all.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oeBeansMan
over a year ago

Derby

Why does it make you sad OP?

I'm the youngest of 4 and think living with them and their personalities shaped me as a person, almost as much as my parents did. I have a friend who's an only child and he seems reasonably well adjusted but do think the need for established friendships may be more important for an only child.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Not me but my son was an only child. The day he started nursery he connected with another only child. They where joined at the hip they went everywhere together was always at one house or another and his friend came on holiday with us. They where best friends right until they left secondary school then moved to separate areas. So although he was an only child he had someone with him most of the timr

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I guess I feel sad because although she has family here she doesn't have any family that would be close in age which bothers me more than it should.

I come from a big family and siblings and cousins were a massive part of my life growing up. I just don't want her childhood to feel empty if she never finds a friend she can call her bestie... but part of me really doesn't want to go through childbirth again or get too caught up thinking about what the future holds for any more kids I bring into this world.

I dunno, I just feel really guilty sometimes. And try to justify not having another kid. But I don't think I can leave her without one. I don’t even mind if they aren't super close, I just want her to have that sibling bond and some proper family other than me and her dad.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

No

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I’m an only child. I was spoilt. With love. The only downside is that I cannot share things. I’ve never had to and I often don’t want to, so I am probably selfish. I would have liked an older brother but it is what it is.

I have two children and their arguments stress me out. My mum had four brothers and she said they were gits. They pushed her (in her pram!) down a hill when they were all young.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I guess I feel sad because although she has family here she doesn't have any family that would be close in age which bothers me more than it should.

I come from a big family and siblings and cousins were a massive part of my life growing up. I just don't want her childhood to feel empty if she never finds a friend she can call her bestie... but part of me really doesn't want to go through childbirth again or get too caught up thinking about what the future holds for any more kids I bring into this world.

I dunno, I just feel really guilty sometimes. And try to justify not having another kid. But I don't think I can leave her without one. I don’t even mind if they aren't super close, I just want her to have that sibling bond and some proper family other than me and her dad.

"

Adoption? Another Child, not your own...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s more, where I came from. Fricking annoying they were too. In fact, they still are. Often

But we do have a laugh together, and we would fight to the death, for each other. That fun and the loyalty means a lot

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No"

Ah I see.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m an only child. I was spoilt. With love. The only downside is that I cannot share things. I’ve never had to and I often don’t want to, so I am probably selfish. I would have liked an older brother but it is what it is.

I have two children and their arguments stress me out. My mum had four brothers and she said they were gits. They pushed her (in her pram!) down a hill when they were all young. "

Your poor mum. Sounds like my childhood too.

Yes that's the joy of having more than one I suppose. I'll have all that stress to enjoy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have lots of siblings. My father has been married more times than I can remember xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *illloganMan
over a year ago

Essex

I'm an only child, wouldn't change it for the world personally.

I have friends that are always going through family/sibling dramas... Not for me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

I was a only child and seem to have done absolutely fine, I did see my cousins a lot and always had family around so don’t feel like I was a lonely child

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?"

I'm not an only child but wish I was!! Siblings aren't always a source of love & comfort.

My son is an only child. He's grown to be a kind, mature, interesting 21 year old who makes friends easily & is universally liked. Because we only had him, our house was the hub for all of his friends to gather so he was never lonely.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I think this is one of those things that there won't ever be a truely helpful answer since pretty much everyone is biased toward their own experience and won't ever have experienced the other side to give a good comparison, especially when circumstances growing up will have been highly different.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

For what it’s worth I have a younger brother. We are totally different people and fought like hell growing up. We don’t talk at all so I never felt like I had a brother, if that makes sense.

I do hear that only children are often considered independent, good at making new friends and close to their parents. All of these sound pretty good.

If childbirth is the big thing, are women able to opt for caesarean section? Please forgive the naivety of this question, I don’t know whether that’s valid/offensive.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?

I'm not an only child but wish I was!! Siblings aren't always a source of love & comfort.

My son is an only child. He's grown to be a kind, mature, interesting 21 year old who makes friends easily & is universally liked. Because we only had him, our house was the hub for all of his friends to gather so he was never lonely. "

I totally get that! I have a difficult relationship with most of my brothers and they have brought me nothing but misery but I can't imagine life without them.

My little one does have loads of friends but nobody yet who is a big constant in her life. She's still tiny so I'm sure it will come, I just worry if it doesn't and then she has nobody around.

I'm overthinking it I know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

.

I have one brother. Fought like cat & dog when younger but are close now. We have a huge family with lots of cousins so had such lovely memories of growing up together, we’d all meet at my grandads three times a week.

Now all the cousins have kids so they’re close too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think this is one of those things that there won't ever be a truely helpful answer since pretty much everyone is biased toward their own experience and won't ever have experienced the other side to give a good comparison, especially when circumstances growing up will have been highly different. "

Yes you're right. I was hoping this would solve my problem but it didn't. I think I'm going to do it but *screams* why is it so difficult?!

I have considered adoption though! I'd love to. I'll see what happens over the next few years.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"For what it’s worth I have a younger brother. We are totally different people and fought like hell growing up. We don’t talk at all so I never felt like I had a brother, if that makes sense.

I do hear that only children are often considered independent, good at making new friends and close to their parents. All of these sound pretty good.

If childbirth is the big thing, are women able to opt for caesarean section? Please forgive the naivety of this question, I don’t know whether that’s valid/offensive."

A cesarean wouldn't make it any easier. I've never had one, but from what women have told me it's much worse than a vaginal delivery. You're cut wide open and then you've got a newborn to look after, you'll have no rest. I'm hoping I'll never have to go down that route.

It's not just childbirth too. I was very sick in pregnancy, and my daughter was unwell. And then the sleepless nights and days that last for what feels like a lifetime. And all that worrying and anxiety.

I wouldn't change my little one but it's hard work.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have one brother. Fought like cat & dog when younger but are close now. We have a huge family with lots of cousins so had such lovely memories of growing up together, we’d all meet at my grandads three times a week.

Now all the cousins have kids so they’re close too.

"

I wish my little one had that. She did until we moved country but we had no choice. I feel like being surrounded by family when you're young makes a big difference.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?

I'm not an only child but wish I was!! Siblings aren't always a source of love & comfort.

My son is an only child. He's grown to be a kind, mature, interesting 21 year old who makes friends easily & is universally liked. Because we only had him, our house was the hub for all of his friends to gather so he was never lonely.

I totally get that! I have a difficult relationship with most of my brothers and they have brought me nothing but misery but I can't imagine life without them.

My little one does have loads of friends but nobody yet who is a big constant in her life. She's still tiny so I'm sure it will come, I just worry if it doesn't and then she has nobody around.

I'm overthinking it I know. "

I think you might be just a little bit, but that's what loving parents do!!

The thing is, your child will only be accustomed to their own upbringing, so that'll be normal. Sure, kids can compare with their mates when they're older, but that's normal. All of their friends with siblings will likely be doing the same, wishing they were only children!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

Theres good and bad things with having 1 or 2 children.

Yes they can play together and yes they can fight together ive seen it both ways.

Im also aware that both defended each other.

Its very helpful when both children want to help you in what you are doing, You certainly need to make 2 cake mixes and give them both a bowl each.

I always treated both of them, the same way even when one of them was my step child.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Due to the vast age difference between my 2 children (14.5y to be precise), they've both been a bit like only children, especially my son from his birth until he was 14.5yrs old. She really looks up to her big bro but purely because of the age, they obviously haven't really played together as peers. Our son seems to have turned out just fine, he's always made friends easily and similar to others on here, we were often the site of the mass gathering of friends for our son etc.

We didn't have our daughter because of concerns about our son having no siblings, but because we wanted to have a child of our own together. That, plus I'd had my son so very young, that we thought it would be a good idea to try again as proper grown ups. As you probably know with the consequences of that pregnancy, the whole "good idea" thing should be considered carefully in retrospect......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oubleswing2019Man
over a year ago

Colchester


"And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?"

Only child. At least I thought I was. Grew up as one. Discovered I had siblings a few years ago. Spoke to one of them and they accused me of only turning up due to death in their family and that I was after an inheritance.

(In truth I knew nothing of the death)

I put the phone down and have no intention of getting entangled with them. Managed 54 years on my own thanks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8


"For what it’s worth I have a younger brother. We are totally different people and fought like hell growing up. We don’t talk at all so I never felt like I had a brother, if that makes sense.

I do hear that only children are often considered independent, good at making new friends and close to their parents. All of these sound pretty good.

If childbirth is the big thing, are women able to opt for caesarean section? Please forgive the naivety of this question, I don’t know whether that’s valid/offensive.

A cesarean wouldn't make it any easier. I've never had one, but from what women have told me it's much worse than a vaginal delivery. You're cut wide open and then you've got a newborn to look after, you'll have no rest. I'm hoping I'll never have to go down that route.

It's not just childbirth too. I was very sick in pregnancy, and my daughter was unwell. And then the sleepless nights and days that last for what feels like a lifetime. And all that worrying and anxiety.

I wouldn't change my little one but it's hard work.

"

Ah ok, yes that makes total sense. I know pregnancy can be a huge burden, physically and emotionally. I hadn’t appreciated it’s also about not looking after a newborn. I’ve never experienced that but can only begin to imagine how much it takes out of parents, not least if you also have their sister to sort out.

Perhaps a rescue is the way forward.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

I'm an only child, can't ever say I felt lonely growing up. Had lots of friends I used to hang out with. In the other hand I'm quite content been in my own company too. Same as someone else has already said, I was spoilt as a child and that did shape me to be selfish is some respects. Something I think I've tried to change asive grown older. Hopefully I have.

XX

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

I can’t say I understand what it’s like to be an only child as I have 2 brothers that I’m very close with, but I couldn’t not have just the one child and know I was right in my decision as my 2 are so close it’s beautiful to watch, they have such a close bond.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

I'm have a sister two years younger than me, I don't think we were really close as kids.

She moved away, only 20 miles, married and we only saw each other at family gatherings once or twice a year. After 15 years, she and her husband moved closer, only 8 miles away .

Two years later, she's 40 and announces that she's pregnant despite being told at 20 that she couldn't have kids.

I visited her the day my nephew was born and promised that I would be the best uncle I could be. We became very close, I used to babysit every week and sometimes take him away for a night in the camper. He's been spoilt rotten by me, both sets of grandparents, etc.

But he's now a pleasent well mannered 16 year old, he's never been lonely and I think he's had a great childhood.

I wouldn't worry, kids get used to their circumstances.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"I'm have a sister two years younger than me, I don't think we were really close as kids.

She moved away, only 20 miles, married and we only saw each other at family gatherings once or twice a year. After 15 years, she and her husband moved closer, only 8 miles away .

Two years later, she's 40 and announces that she's pregnant despite being told at 20 that she couldn't have kids.

I visited her the day my nephew was born and promised that I would be the best uncle I could be. We became very close, I used to babysit every week and sometimes take him away for a night in the camper. He's been spoilt rotten by me, both sets of grandparents, etc.

But he's now a pleasent well mannered 16 year old, he's never been lonely and I think he's had a great childhood.

I wouldn't worry, kids get used to their circumstances.

"

Aww, your nephew sounds like a lucky lad to have you guys as his family

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm an only child. To be honest its never bothered me I didn't have siblings and also I never felt lonely.

Though I did spend a lot of time as a kid alone reading and stuff like that and I am sure that had a significant impact on me as I have only ever worked in academia.

I do also have a very close friend I met at Uni and we call each other "bruv" and "sis" as he is an only child too. So maybe we fill some void perhaps? But we do it more for fun than anything.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ourmanMan
over a year ago

Belper

I'm an only child . Always wanted a brother or sister,,Have had so many people say you're lucky ..Always reply why? , yes you are on your own, yes you can make friends , but there are times when you need someone at whatever age, and more so when you get older and you have no family around ,

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ayna20Couple
over a year ago

Kent

Mr here

I have no siblings

As a kid it wasn’t an issue at all, I had so many friends I just didn’t miss a sibling. My parents house was the social centre of the world.

Moving house in my mid teens to a new area quite a distance from my school took me away from the friends I’d grown with at primary school, and made socialising with friends at secondary hard (because of distance). Moved to a new area where I knew nobody at an awkward age - so as a result I’ve gone through life with no close friends. That is where I’ve missed a sibling. And yes the older I got the more I wished for a sibling.

For me having experienced it, I wouldn’t want only one child - but of course nature will have her way for some of us.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could've written this thread myself.

Me and Mr J have thought about this too as we are in the same situation with our daughter. We are only set on having just one but I can't help but feel guilty that she won't have any siblings.

I have a close nit family and I have 2 older brothers that I'm so close with and can go to anything with.

I was also very sick in pregnancy every single day, struggled a lot especially towards the end with how petite I am and how big I was and let's say my birth wasn't the best either

Such a dilemma. Especially going back and forth with the idea, but then I think if I don't want another one I can't surley have one for the sake of just having another so she can have a sibling? But will I feel different when she's a bit older. I don't know.

Miss S x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I'm not but my ex was and always said he didn't want our eldest to be an only child because he found it quite lonely. He saw the relationship I have with my siblings and wanted our children to be like that.

Pxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ring it onMan
over a year ago

wirral

Wish I was my sister is a rat n my brothers r dickheads

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have two siblings but look at them.and think fuck I must have been adopted

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornyguyMan
over a year ago

Hillsborough, NI

I'm an only child and I have memories of people saying "you poor thing" to me when I was younger when I said I was an only child; this confused me, as I had no perception that it was considered to be a problem.

I never felt that I missed a brother or sister, and I'm glad I didn't have to share, so probably got more for birthdays and Christmas etc.

On the counter argument, I have a son and I have sat playing with him on occasions and the thought had crossed my mind that it'd be nice for him to have a sibling to play with.

For that, I thought the age gap would need to be close together though; I have memories of older cousins just being annoying, rather than fun to play with.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aramel.desiresMan
over a year ago

London

Hi Op

I’m an only child but I did grow with lots of cousins. I do not recall feeling lonely as a child as they lived 1 minute away. As I grew up I decided to put some space between me and cousins because there was too much drama.

Now, I do get a bit said when I hear about friends visiting siblings but these are families that are close. And as an only child I never really had that closeness with any family. Family can be great but also dysfunctional and full of drama. And so can some friendship groups as you can see in this thread.

I would encourage you to help your child build good social skills so they can make friends for life but also protect themselves from bad relationships.

Hope this helps.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not an only child, I'm the youngest of four and growing up was very volatile. My son is an only child, was a bit spoiled and he used to show signs of entitlement. But is coming round to the fact we're all "connected' and becoming less self-entitled. Everything works out in the end *shrugs*

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was until i was 14 when my mum had my sister then 19 when she had my youngest sister, never gre up with them but the 3 of us are close and have a great bond, my youngest sis is my going out with buddy shes basically me 19 years younger lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *issB.Woman
over a year ago

Barnsley

I’m an only child and wouldn’t change it for the world! My mam and dad are my best mates and we are a complete team. I only have one daughter and do sometimes think I wish she had a sibling - for the only reason when she is older she has some support when we are not here or are poorly and need help. I am aware if my parents health declines I am kind of a one woman band on that front x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And how do you feel about it? Do you ever feel lonely?

I'd really like to just have one child but the thought of my little human growing up without any siblings makes me sad.

So how was it for you?"

Yes, alone.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *parrow77Man
over a year ago

cheshire

Yeah am single child and was great never any problems or missed anything else.

Friend asked me this while ago and my answer was never had so don’t know what like or if having more would be different.

I probably like my own space more cos I had it and my family made sure was happy and stuff not by spoiling with money as some can be but adventures and trips and love.

The stuff they got me am more protective over than ppl with large families.

But I never felt missed out

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

I would not have liked to be an only child. Have 2 brothers and got closer as mates in later years.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

So much I could say about this. I have a sister only 20 months younger than me, and although we often bickered as children we get on brilliantly now. She's an absolute star and we have great fun together...I think I'm hugely grateful not to have been an only child.

On the other hand, that complicates my feelings about my son. He's an only child, and increasingly likely to remain my only child...what's more, he's the only grandchild on both sides, though he has two uncles and an aunt, so no cousins, either. And he lives in a village, 150 miles from both sets of grandparents (in completely opposite directions).

So he mostly hangs out with me, and Covid didn't help with the understandable restrictions on meeting. I'd say he was a lot less confident with other children than I was at his age, having had much less practice. But he is gaining in that as he gets older, and more gregarious

Sometimes he says he would have liked a brother/sister, but not a baby...he'd mostly like a boy a year or so younger, who loved football just as much (but wasn't quite as good, because ego!). A close friend who is always there, basically - but as we all know, that's a very idealised view of what brothers can be!

I think overall, as others have said, children are wonderfully resilient adaptors. What matters is that your little one knows she is loved without question, because that will give her the confidence to risk reaching out to new people, knowing she always has you for unconditional love if it goes wrong. It's not about apron-strings getting in the way of independence - it's about scaffolding, that can gradually be dismantled as it is no longer needed. As she gets older she will not only make more local friends, but will see more of her English cousins, etc, too.

Tldr: try not to worry too much...friends and confidence will come, either way, over time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I private messaged you LBC xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am sorry I am going to give you a different look on this, probably a bit more negative...

I am an only child and I've always felt that the lack of siblings affected me in a negative way. When I had my own son, I never intended for him to be an only child because of my own experience, but I divorced shortly after he was born and have never met anyone with whom I considered having more children. So at this point, because of my age and how unlikely it is, I'd ever have another partner, he is going to be an only child.

Getting to the point, my son has been also affected negatively by being an only child. He is not very socially skilled and has a horrible time socializing with people, which affects his performance in many aspects of life.

At the end of the day, it is your choice and what suits your family, but I'd say, not all kids are the same, not all kids are able to make friends, so that might also be something you need to consider.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford


"I’m an only child and wouldn’t change it for the world! My mam and dad are my best mates and we are a complete team. I only have one daughter and do sometimes think I wish she had a sibling - for the only reason when she is older she has some support when we are not here or are poorly and need help. I am aware if my parents health declines I am kind of a one woman band on that front x"

Even if you had another siberling, you might have ended up being there only support.

For me my daughter has always helped out with her grandma.

Something im thankful of.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m technically the 3rd of 5 because my dad can’t keep it in his pants, although I was raised the oldest of 3

Me and my younger sister tore strips off each other on a daily basis, my mum deserves the Nobel peace prize to getting us both to our 30’s alive.

We’re not especially close now, but do get on when we speak or see each other.

My brother was mostly raised as an only child as we only saw him every couple of weeks. He was a little shit when we were kids, but is pretty cool now. Again, we get on but we aren’t close. We can and have gone years without seeing each other or speaking.

I think when I was young maybe I would have missed out on having siblings, but now not so much.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am not. But as no one is talking to one another, it is sort of the same

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am not. But as no one is talking to one another, it is sort of the same "

yes this too, sounds like my lot !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvySub87Woman
over a year ago

Near Wellingborough

I have 2 brothers, eldest passed when I was 13, other is an ignorant teat so I might as well be an only child.

My son will be an only child because I can't afford another round of ivf but he'll have friends so I'm not worried

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both of us have siblings but only have one child , not out of choice , just happened that way. Ive talked to her about if she felt like she missed out by not having siblings.

Her reply was she didnt know any difference and had an amazing childhood with lots of freinds and never felt lonely at all.

Always been very close to us both and gone to have a great start to adult life and her career.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Well thank you all for the replies! I've read each one and I'm still not sure. I am more leaning to going for another one, but I want to make sure I'm 110% sure about it.

I guess I'll make up my mind someday. It's been amazing reading from so many different perspectives.

Thank you Elephantis for that wonderful response. It's the lack of family here that make this feel worse than what it is I think. I don't know why I worry, because she is social and gets on with everyone. But it's the lack of something solid I suppose. But what you said is correct, kids are good at adapting.

Thank you to those who shared privately too.

I apreciate it besties.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I'm one of four and had four myself

My closest friend is an only child and she hated it growing up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Limoncello, you must think about your own health and sanity in this too. You said you'd had a lot of sickness (often gets worse in subsequent pregnancies) and a tough labour. And might feel it very challenging to have the baby and your daughter to care for at the same time (though I'm sure you'll work that out). Don't make the decision for your daughter, because ultimately she will be just fine as a single child. Make it for you and your partner and especially for your own wellbeing, as you have to grow the baba inside your lovely body and fire it out from your vay-jay-jay. And you might choose to sacrifice your magnificent boobsticles for the greater good of mankind.

You and also your partner should be the main focus of your decision

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

Might as well be as I don’t have a relationship with my sister

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I'm an only child.

No, the loneliness never bothered me or even existed in my mind or life when I grew up. My parents raised me well to be used to having a lone wolf life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *undayGirl 69Woman
over a year ago

Coalville

I’m an only child… n it’s never bothered me.

Until now with an ill parent. There’s no one to help out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

.

I have a half brother and half sister but never once have I felt grateful for that, would have been much happier as an only child.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"I’m an only child… n it’s never bothered me.

Until now with an ill parent. There’s no one to help out.

"

Having siblings guarantees nothing! Even though I am physically disabled myself, I often have to push my brother into doing things for Dad. Not because he's unfeeling, but because he has a job and two young children to support. But I physically cannot do much to help nowadays. I know many families where siblings fall out over the split of "care" of ill or elderly parents.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aramel.desiresMan
over a year ago

London

Siblings can be a big let down and that can hurt the most!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"I’m an only child… n it’s never bothered me.

Until now with an ill parent. There’s no one to help out.

"

I once called a helpline in desperation because I was at the end of my tether with my mum and dad. The very nice woman who answered asked if I had siblings. I replied that I did until it came to helping with mum and dad when I was effectively an only child.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"I’m an only child… n it’s never bothered me.

Until now with an ill parent. There’s no one to help out.

Having siblings guarantees nothing! Even though I am physically disabled myself, I often have to push my brother into doing things for Dad. Not because he's unfeeling, but because he has a job and two young children to support. But I physically cannot do much to help nowadays. I know many families where siblings fall out over the split of "care" of ill or elderly parents. "

Me too. The only reason I haven't fallen out with my brother's is because I've made a conscious decision not to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Limoncello, you must think about your own health and sanity in this too. You said you'd had a lot of sickness (often gets worse in subsequent pregnancies) and a tough labour. And might feel it very challenging to have the baby and your daughter to care for at the same time (though I'm sure you'll work that out). Don't make the decision for your daughter, because ultimately she will be just fine as a single child. Make it for you and your partner and especially for your own wellbeing, as you have to grow the baba inside your lovely body and fire it out from your vay-jay-jay. And you might choose to sacrifice your magnificent boobsticles for the greater good of mankind.

You and also your partner should be the main focus of your decision "

Thanks Kayceeeeeeee KC kinky. You are always a very wise woman with your words.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top