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"Top up pension" I'll never make it to that age | |||
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"Mine's in May, so easier to do outdoor things. I had lunch with very close friends on a steam train, then a lovely picnic by the river in the evening with lots of friends,rosé, etc. As dusk came we played guitars and sang. It was beautiful. For a February birthday, though,I can at least recommend a beautiful train journey. Maybe the Cornish Riviera, then the ferry over to the Scillies fir a long weekend?" I'd love to go abroad for it, no passport at the moment or the funds unfortunately. | |||
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"Have a goodbye to your thirties party. Dress in all black. Listen to Lana Del Rey. Book a SAGA holiday, lubricated with espresso martinis so you'll stay awake past 9pm in your old age. Start messaging 18-25 year old women asking if they want a sugar daddy. Got to have a midlife crisis in your celebrations." I'm good with dressing in black, it's a great colour. I often get emails from Saga etc, I have to check my age because I don't think I pass yet 
I only offer my beautiful penis, not my pennies  | |||
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"Deduct 10 years from your fab age so you don't miss out on all those young hotties "I'm going to have to put a status up asking them to adjust age filters accordingly | |||
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"Go on holiday " I honestly haven't been anywhere outside of UK since 2007, it's depressing. | |||
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"I'm turning 45 in a little over 2 weeks.m I'm considering hiding lol" I might just do that | |||
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"Just treat it like another day..then you won't be reminded of the fact you're 40...not that's there's anything wrong with being 40.. I'd be more than happy to swap.." I'm suprised I made it this far, it counts as passed middle aged I reckon. I'll happily be 18 again | |||
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"have a giant fuck fest party" I'm happy with a MFF, I'm not greedy | |||
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"I'm turning 45 in a little over 2 weeks.m I'm considering hiding lol I might just do that "Hide together?? Lol | |||
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"Get yourself up to a Manchester club, Pull on a Man Utd goalkeeper shirt and sign autographs as David de Gea for all the young hotties "There's definitely zero chance of me wearing a Utd shirt being a Liverpool supporter | |||
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"I'm turning 45 in a little over 2 weeks.m I'm considering hiding lol I might just do that
Hide together?? Lol"I'm not sharing my hiding spot | |||
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"Get yourself up to a Manchester club, Pull on a Man Utd goalkeeper shirt and sign autographs as David de Gea for all the young hotties
There's definitely zero chance of me wearing a Utd shirt being a Liverpool supporter "fair point , you do look like him though  | |||
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"I'm turning 45 in a little over 2 weeks.m I'm considering hiding lol I might just do that
Hide together?? Lol
I'm not sharing my hiding spot "Spoilsport lol | |||
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"Could be worse, could be 23. We all know the situation as a 23 year old. " I can't remember what it was like, I feel really sorry for them though and only about 7 years until they hit their prime | |||
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"Splash out on lurpak and Heinz beans. Beans on toast" I'm not made of money | |||
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"Could be worse, could be 23. We all know the situation as a 23 year old. I can't remember what it was like, I feel really sorry for them though and only about 7 years until they hit their prime "Nobody likes you when you are 23! Yeah,just view 40 as the new 30,thats what people keep telling me now, or is 50 the new 30? | |||
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"Get yourself up to a Manchester club, Pull on a Man Utd goalkeeper shirt and sign autographs as David de Gea for all the young hotties
There's definitely zero chance of me wearing a Utd shirt being a Liverpool supporter fair point , you do look like him though "I've been told that before and Buffon, maybe I'll join one of those party companies that rent out lookalikes | |||
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"Make a list of 40 things you want to achieve and consider doing one of them on your birthday. Easily achieved if one of them is: Buy nice new white shirt Head into town with two mates Pub crawl interrupted by a curry, during which you splash madras on your new shirt D*unkenly chat up a 22 year old student When she turns you down offend her by asking which one of her mates you can have instead Realise for the first time you actually care about how disappointed you are with how disgusting the men’s toilets are Make a stupid bet with your mates Traumatised by your earlier thoughts, convince yourself you are definitely still young enough to go clubbing Stand in the queue thinking “ffs are any of these women even 18 yet?” Realise you don’t like the music inside but dance like a dad anyway Moan about the cost of getting in and drinks Leave early and stop for a kebab Spill chilli sauce on your shirt Get into a pointless argument with the bloke in the taxi queue Wake up the next morning, still dressed, starting your new two-day hangover routine, realise you spent too much money and no longer like being 39 anyway. Welcome to your 40s!!! "Sounds like a great plan | |||
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"Could be worse, could be 23. We all know the situation as a 23 year old. I can't remember what it was like, I feel really sorry for them though and only about 7 years until they hit their prime
Nobody likes you when you are 23!
Yeah,just view 40 as the new 30,thats what people keep telling me now, or is 50 the new 30?"It's so hard being young
Only as old as who you're feeling, so I'm my age | |||
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"Book yourself into a nudist spa for the day and get a full massage, steak dinner somewhere nice and then a club for the night (take cake with you) and then back to a nice hotel "That's one truly special cake if I'm booking a hotel for it | |||
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"I turned 47 last week… I’ve been hiding and hibernating since…. Didn’t even get a birthday bunk up so been having my own pity party for one since lol " I just make up for lack of sex when I'm having it again | |||
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"I don’t believe you. Your 18!yrs old at most!!! "I've been on here 4 years | |||
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"Big 40 in a few weeks, need ideas please. Funny, sarcastic and serious suggestions all welcome "• Dress well, contemporarily preferred, cologne optional, and then I'll treat you to the Måd Håtter's Afternoon Teå at The Sanderson Hotel in Fitzrovia. | |||
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"Big 40 in a few weeks, need ideas please. Funny, sarcastic and serious suggestions all welcome
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Dress well, contemporarily preferred, cologne optional, and then I'll treat you to the
Måd Håtter's Afternoon Teå at The Sanderson Hotel in Fitzrovia."Looks nice, I got my suit ready | |||
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"People thought I was being awfully weird when I didn’t want to celebrate my big 40 last year, but to be fair, I don’t see much of a difference from one year to another. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful warm day of May and I managed to get lots of fun by the Thames in a little food market. It doesn’t need to be formal, but make it so you are happy with it. "It falls on a Monday this year, I'll probably be at home and not doing much. I'll try to do something over the weekend though I think. | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry." I do that most days. | |||
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"People thought I was being awfully weird when I didn’t want to celebrate my big 40 last year, but to be fair, I don’t see much of a difference from one year to another. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful warm day of May and I managed to get lots of fun by the Thames in a little food market. It doesn’t need to be formal, but make it so you are happy with it.
It falls on a Monday this year, I'll probably be at home and not doing much. I'll try to do something over the weekend though I think. "Or go formal and do what Nero suggested
Personally, I like the idea of a posh afternoon tea or steak and a massage | |||
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"Behave really disgracefully, steal some crutches and a mobility scooter buy some tena for men as its all down hill from 40 " Bit much stealing crutches and scooter, I'll just go with the scooter so I can modify it with a petrol engine and scare the crap out of people
I just use tesco bags at the moment, maybe I'll treat myself. | |||
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I hope whatever you decide to do it pleases you.
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"People thought I was being awfully weird when I didn’t want to celebrate my big 40 last year, but to be fair, I don’t see much of a difference from one year to another. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful warm day of May and I managed to get lots of fun by the Thames in a little food market. It doesn’t need to be formal, but make it so you are happy with it.
It falls on a Monday this year, I'll probably be at home and not doing much. I'll try to do something over the weekend though I think.
Or go formal and do what Nero suggested
Personally, I like the idea of a posh afternoon tea or steak and a massage "I like afternoon tea, it's not a bad suggestion at all really. I love steak and massages also | |||
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"Could be worse, could be 23. We all know the situation as a 23 year old. I can't remember what it was like, I feel really sorry for them though and only about 7 years until they hit their prime
Nobody likes you when you are 23!
Yeah,just view 40 as the new 30,thats what people keep telling me now, or is 50 the new 30?"No-one likes you when you're 23. I suggest you act like you're in freshman year. If your friends say you should act your age, Sorry, what's your age again?! I recommend that you don't take yourself so seriously | |||
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"Behave really disgracefully, steal some crutches and a mobility scooter buy some tena for men as its all down hill from 40 Bit much stealing crutches and scooter, I'll just go with the scooter so I can modify it with a petrol engine and scare the crap out of people
I just use tesco bags at the moment, maybe I'll treat myself. "I can lend you a walking frame | |||
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"I didn't do anything big for my 40th I really didn't want the fuss. It's my birthday soon too. I would really like cake and lots of it!
I hope whatever you decide to do it pleases you.
"I really want lots of cake, even if I have to buy it myself
Mum will probably bake me one I hope | |||
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"Behave really disgracefully, steal some crutches and a mobility scooter buy some tena for men as its all down hill from 40 Bit much stealing crutches and scooter, I'll just go with the scooter so I can modify it with a petrol engine and scare the crap out of people
I just use tesco bags at the moment, maybe I'll treat myself.
I can lend you a walking frame "I can pinch mums if I really need to, think she's more in need than myself. | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days." Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair. | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days. Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair." But I'm having tea with Nero, posh tea with cakes and stuff. | |||
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"Have a goodbye to your thirties party. Dress in all black. Listen to Lana Del Rey. Book a SAGA holiday, lubricated with espresso martinis so you'll stay awake past 9pm in your old age. Start messaging 18-25 year old women asking if they want a sugar daddy. Got to have a midlife crisis in your celebrations. I'm good with dressing in black, it's a great colour. I often get emails from Saga etc, I have to check my age because I don't think I pass yet
I only offer my beautiful penis, not my pennies "Beautiful penis is enough. Cry wank a tribute out for some hot young thing. Tears make great lube. | |||
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"We now have maids in minis as part of our company... they look amazing... hire them." I'd pay them with my company in return, I'm pretty awesome to hang out with and I won't ask them to dust the webs | |||
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"Happy birthday in advance. Mines on Sunday - 2 playmates wanted!" Happy advanced birthday wishes to yourself. | |||
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"Have a goodbye to your thirties party. Dress in all black. Listen to Lana Del Rey. Book a SAGA holiday, lubricated with espresso martinis so you'll stay awake past 9pm in your old age. Start messaging 18-25 year old women asking if they want a sugar daddy. Got to have a midlife crisis in your celebrations. I'm good with dressing in black, it's a great colour. I often get emails from Saga etc, I have to check my age because I don't think I pass yet
I only offer my beautiful penis, not my pennies
Beautiful penis is enough.
Cry wank a tribute out for some hot young thing. Tears make great lube. "I'm actually going to try tears for lube one day to test the theory | |||
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46 next month... heading towards the big 50 quicker than titanic going down.
If only I could get this damn flex capacitor working and find a way of generating 2.1GWatts of energy. | |||
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"It’s just a number.. just crack on & do whatever it is that u normally do.." Not on here it's not, how am I going to cope when someone I like joins and their filters on 39? | |||
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"More behind us than if front..
46 next month... heading towards the big 50 quicker than titanic going down.
If only I could get this damn flex capacitor working and find a way of generating 2.1GWatts of energy."Are you thinking about shocking yourself? | |||
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"More behind us than if front..
46 next month... heading towards the big 50 quicker than titanic going down.
If only I could get this damn flex capacitor working and find a way of generating 2.1GWatts of energy.
Are you thinking about shocking yourself? "My bad, you meant flux not flex | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days. Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair. But I'm having tea with Nero, posh tea with cakes and stuff. " He won't mind me stroking your hair as you take tea. He's an amiable chap. | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days. Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair. But I'm having tea with Nero, posh tea with cakes and stuff. He won't mind me stroking your hair as you take tea. He's an amiable chap. " You might look a bit odd standing behind me in a restaurant doing it | |||
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"Have a night out in Neath. Treat yourself." Have you seen Neath? | |||
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"Have a night out in Neath. Treat yourself. Have you seen Neath? "Went there once. Still scarred. | |||
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"Have a night out in Neath. Treat yourself. Have you seen Neath?
Went there once. Still scarred."I've only been during daylight, never at night. | |||
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"Spoil yourself rotten...turn the heating up by 1°. " It's prepayed oil here and log burner, valley life. | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days. Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair. But I'm having tea with Nero, posh tea with cakes and stuff. He won't mind me stroking your hair as you take tea. He's an amiable chap. You might look a bit odd standing behind me in a restaurant doing it "• It's not just tea: it's also Yin & Yang cocktails at The Long Bar. | |||
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"Behave really disgracefully, steal some crutches and a mobility scooter buy some tena for men as its all down hill from 40 Bit much stealing crutches and scooter, I'll just go with the scooter so I can modify it with a petrol engine and scare the crap out of people
I just use tesco bags at the moment, maybe I'll treat myself. "Piscean shoplifting isint really treating yourself.... | |||
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"I don’t believe you. Your 18!yrs old at most!!!
I've been on here 4 years "That’s what she said!!! | |||
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"Sit on the edge of your bed and cry. I do that most days. Invite me over then. I'll make you tea, lay on your bed with you and stroke your hair. But I'm having tea with Nero, posh tea with cakes and stuff. He won't mind me stroking your hair as you take tea. He's an amiable chap. You might look a bit odd standing behind me in a restaurant doing it
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It's not just tea: it's also Yin & Yang cocktails at The Long Bar."I've never had one of those. | |||
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"Behave really disgracefully, steal some crutches and a mobility scooter buy some tena for men as its all down hill from 40 Bit much stealing crutches and scooter, I'll just go with the scooter so I can modify it with a petrol engine and scare the crap out of people
I just use tesco bags at the moment, maybe I'll treat myself.
Piscean shoplifting isint really treating yourself.... " | |||
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"Tandem skydive! Clothes optional" I done indoor one a while ago, was fun but noisy. | |||
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I’m closer to 50 and I’m having the greatest sex ever so I think there’s a realm you go through in your 40’s when you turn into a stud muffin. Or maybe women’s eyesight goes - I don’t care
K | |||
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"Big 40 in a few weeks, need ideas please. Funny, sarcastic and serious suggestions all welcome "Be an arsehole and get someone sacked. I mean mows the time to do it with the cost of everything going up!  | |||
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"Message everyone now as you’ll drop off a lot of searches when you hit 40
I’m closer to 50 and I’m having the greatest sex ever so I think there’s a realm you go through in your 40’s when you turn into a stud muffin. Or maybe women’s eyesight goes - I don’t care
K"But I'm already in my prime, are you saying I'm going to get even better in bed? | |||
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"Big 40 in a few weeks, need ideas please. Funny, sarcastic and serious suggestions all welcome
Be an arsehole and get someone sacked.
I mean mows the time to do it with the cost of everything going up! "Not sacking anymore from my Empire at the moment. | |||
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"Message everyone now as you’ll drop off a lot of searches when you hit 40
I’m closer to 50 and I’m having the greatest sex ever so I think there’s a realm you go through in your 40’s when you turn into a stud muffin. Or maybe women’s eyesight goes - I don’t care
K
But I'm already in my prime, are you saying I'm going to get even better in bed? "I don’t really care - I just wanted to show off about the amount of sex I’m having
K | |||
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. Wonder if you can guess  | |||
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"I have an idea that would be fun . Wonder if you can guess "Wash his arse so you can tickle his fartbox? | |||
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"It’s just a number.. just crack on & do whatever it is that u normally do.. Not on here it's not, how am I going to cope when someone I like joins and their filters on 39? "Change your age to 35 | |||
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, l have a great friend who had a party at the same age and said he was only telling a few and having a small one ..I told him l was nearing the same age and l wasn't telling anyone ..was never one to have parties myself, would of course go to parties but did not want them myself as l was fierce uncomfortable with being the centre of attention. | |||
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"Message everyone now as you’ll drop off a lot of searches when you hit 40
I’m closer to 50 and I’m having the greatest sex ever so I think there’s a realm you go through in your 40’s when you turn into a stud muffin. Or maybe women’s eyesight goes - I don’t care
K
But I'm already in my prime, are you saying I'm going to get even better in bed?
I don’t really care - I just wanted to show off about the amount of sex I’m having
K"Well that's mean  I'm not having any | |||
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"Have a go at flying in one of those Indoor Skydiving wind tunnels. Get the video as memories to look back on forever,and you'll instantly get a free face lift as well from the wind! So that saves on any future expensive procedures or wrinkle creams. "I already done that years ago and I gave a to being spun around at the top by the pro, loved it | |||
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"One of the ladies at work did the Velocity 2 zipline for her 40th. It's the longest zipline in Europe and the fastest one in the world according to Google. You can go over 100mph. I think I'd rather just eat chocolate and get fat, but each to their own "Is that the one in Wales? I could eat chocolate at the same time | |||
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"I have an idea that would be fun . Wonder if you can guess "Put your cuffs away Nora | |||
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"It’s just a number.. just crack on & do whatever it is that u normally do.. Not on here it's not, how am I going to cope when someone I like joins and their filters on 39?
Change your age to 35 "
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"Best wishes OP on your upcoming celebrations , l have a great friend who had a party at the same age and said he was only telling a few and having a small one ..I told him l was nearing the same age and l wasn't telling anyone ..was never one to have parties myself, would of course go to parties but did not want them myself as l was fierce uncomfortable with being the centre of attention."If a group of ladies want to throw me a party and make me the centre of attention then I'm ok with that | |||
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"It should be a big celebration , you’re about to enter 10 years of fab prime time "That would definitely be a good thing. | |||
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"I got a hot air balloon experience as one of my 50th birthday presents" I'd love that | |||
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"Update please, Mr. Dréàm: what's the latest with your decision? Reply forthwith before young master Bruce creates another inane thread. "Who's Brucey? Does he do threads? | |||
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