FabSwingers.com forum: what the funnest saying..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ive heard quite a few over the last few years but whats the funniest you have heard..

Mines "mad as a basket of frogs"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To someone making a lot of noise: "You're noisier than a skeleton having a wank in a biscuit tin!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/01/13 05:59:44]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dead moths make ideal hang gliders for maggots.

Now that's complete randomness!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also used to work with a chef who had the most brilliant way of disc describing things...

Wetter than an otters pocket

Saltier than a deep sea dolphins cock

Fishier than an anchovies fanny

A few I can remember, hey was a genius!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ive heard quite a few over the last few years but whats the funniest you have heard..

Mines "mad as a basket of frogs""

I use that! Except I use box instead of basket

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shut that door! Was you born in a barn ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my fav saying is lifes a bitch and then you die .....

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"my fav saying is lifes a bitch and then you die .....

Or - Lifes a bitch, now so am I!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"my fav saying is lifes a bitch and then you die .....

Or - Lifes a bitch, now so am I!"
yes love that one too lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Shut that door! Was you born in a barn ??? "

Remember having a clip around the ear off my mother for replying " I don't know? know you were there" too that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"my fav saying is lifes a bitch and then you die .....

Or - Lifes a bitch, now so am I!yes love that one too lol

I've heard a bloke say.. Lifes a bitch.. Then married one lol

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By *layersdelightCouple
over a year ago

Stevenage

I like the saying "yr as much use as a chocolate teapot" x

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

As much use as tits on fish

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By *azNdavCouple
over a year ago

barnsley

Tighter than a camels arse in a sand storm.

As dry as a nuns crotch.

I've seen more life in a traps vest.

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

More meat on a butchers apron

May God look sideways on you (one my Mam always said when we were being cheeky)

May all your kids walk backwards (another Mam'ism, usually instead of a curse)

That skirt'll look nice when it's finished (i.e. too bloody short)

My personal fave, instead of a swear word, used around children is "Blimey O'Reilly"

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

'look at my profile'..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"More meat on a butchers apron

May God look sideways on you (one my Mam always said when we were being cheeky)

May all your kids walk backwards (another Mam'ism, usually instead of a curse)

That skirt'll look nice when it's finished (i.e. too bloody short)

My personal fave, instead of a swear word, used around children is "Blimey O'Reilly""

Hahhaa i alway said 'chip bag' instead of 'shit bag'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mouths dry as ghandis flip flops

Tight as a nun ass

Hes scotish he squeeks when he walks...

Lifes a bitch then you marry one

Fuck the ugly stick you was born in the ugly forrest..

Just to name a few hahaha..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No luck

Id fall in a bucket of tits and come out sucking me thumb

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone was scared, my nan used to say they were shitting fairylights.

I miss my nan, she was the funniest person I ever knew!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If someone was scared, my nan used to say they were shitting fairylights.

I miss my nan, she was the funniest person I ever knew! "

Haha that tickled me!!

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By *ukus 62Woman
over a year ago

Essex

someone said to me * life is shit flush it and move on*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peter Serafinowicz on Twitter last week..

"If the 'out phase' of gay sex is as good as a really good shit then put me down as curious"

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

'smooth as a tube of snakeshit'

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Single fem ...only meet with my fb present....cracks me up everytime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

colder than a witches tit.

whatever butters your muffin.

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By *uncpl2015Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend Area

about as much use as a nuns c**t

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

situationally bi

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What ever floats ya boat..

What ever tickles ya pickle..

Sandwich sort of a picnic..

Your tree dont go all the way to the top..

Not a full cookie..

Ten bob short of a shilling..

Gahaha..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I knew someone years ago who was,shall we say,cranially endowed.

A mate of mine said 'fuck me.he's got a head like a 50 bob cabbage'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you are nervous

"My arse was twitching like a rabbit’s nostril"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our favourite is from a recent film

"You were right, I was less right"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As much use as an ashtray on motorbike.

she's got a fanny like a ripped out fireplace .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She had nipples like fighter pilots thumbs.

Always tickles me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our favourite is from a recent film

"You were right, I was less right""

Ha! Megamind..also contains the line 'Where did you park the invisible car?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he had brains of dynamite he wouldn't have enough to blow his hat off !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our favourite is from a recent film

"You were right, I was less right"

Ha! Megamind..also contains the line 'Where did you park the invisible car?' "

It is a brilliant film , love the welcome matt next to the secret invisible entrance too. Ooo fancy a session with popcorn!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say to my mate. He'd forget his balls if they weren't in a bag!!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Go take ya head for a s**t

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By *lassic1Man
over a year ago

bellshill

When yu describe some one as being....." a legend in thier own mind"...

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By *o1mrtlcMan
over a year ago

cannock

i think his cheese has slide off his craker

his lights are on but no one home

its like throwing it up a drain pipe

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By *inky BunnyMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Tight as a duck's arse.

Dry as a kangaroo's jockstrap.

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By *e ja vue 2Couple
over a year ago

MANCHESTER

no ....your other left

id give it an hour

she a maltesser.... blonde on the inside

if you break your legs doing that ....dont come running to me

after a fart (bit more choke and that fucker would have started)

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