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"We already know he doesn't want to picture himself combing the leftover toilet paper out of my bum hair" You get nothing for a hair. | |||
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"A cold Cornish pasty that wasnt even made in Cornwall and it had chickpeas and beetroot filling with mushy peas ![]() ![]() I hate beetroot...she's doing well! | |||
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"Yeah… I’d just turn up…. He fucking hates me ![]() ![]() ![]() I do not! But you have got that song she fucking hates me in my head...and for that I hate you a little more? ![]() | |||
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"Already did it yesterday! Sent him a fruity insertion picture! ![]() ![]() That looked DELICIOUS! | |||
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"Yeah… I’d just turn up…. He fucking hates me ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Well… you tried to hard… so I had to rip your feelings.. ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Already did it yesterday! Sent him a fruity insertion picture! ![]() ![]() Ooh, which fruit? | |||
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"Scissors ![]() See, I’m not sure about that one Emily. I saw it and thought of naughty things ![]() | |||
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"Mermaid feet ![]() Speaking of ducks, maybe I should encourage him to Google images of a ducks penis ![]() | |||
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"There's always the Austin Powers axiom, successfully used to resist the charms of the Fembots... ...."Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!" ![]() I don't know if that would have the desired effect. He's pretty kinky ![]() | |||
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"Face pic will def do it Prove it!" Don't trick me. I know you want past our meticulous messaging filters ![]() ![]() | |||
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"There's always the Austin Powers axiom, successfully used to resist the charms of the Fembots... ...."Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!" ![]() ![]() I mean it didn't shrink it down... ![]() | |||
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"Face pic will def do it Prove it! Don't trick me. I know you want past our meticulous messaging filters ![]() ![]() You can block me straight away after like everyone else! ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Whack it with a rolled up newspaper ![]() ![]() Then why is it hairy and smells of cheese? ![]() | |||
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"Whack it with a rolled up newspaper ![]() ![]() ![]() I don't think rats smell of cheese but that's besides the point right? ![]() | |||
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"Scissors ![]() ![]() Really??! ...with scissors?? ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Already did it yesterday! Sent him a fruity insertion picture! ![]() ![]() A strawberry | |||
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"Yeah… I’d just turn up…. He fucking hates me ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() A puddle of mud... | |||
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"Already did it yesterday! Sent him a fruity insertion picture! ![]() ![]() Was it in a jar of jam at the time? | |||
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"I think chopping its head off would work, right? " I imagine that would sting a bit, which has got to be off-putting | |||
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"Op, surely we'd just recount the tail of when Mr R found one of your threadworms on his cock!" Already not loving the sound of this | |||
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"A cold Cornish pasty that wasnt even made in Cornwall and it had chickpeas and beetroot filling with mushy peas ![]() ![]() That’s just made me puke in my mouth! | |||
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"I'll sit on it if you want. " I thought you were trying to kill the erection?! | |||
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"I'll sit on it if you want. I thought you were trying to kill the erection?!" ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I think chopping its head off would work, right? " This should do it ![]() | |||
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"Op, surely we'd just recount the tail of when Mr R found one of your threadworms on his cock!" ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Op, surely we'd just recount the tail of when Mr R found one of your threadworms on his cock! ![]() ![]() Can I still find you sexy after this?! | |||
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"Op, surely we'd just recount the tail of when Mr R found one of your threadworms on his cock! ![]() ![]() Well it wasn't on *my* cock ![]() | |||
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"Op, surely we'd just recount the tail of when Mr R found one of your threadworms on his cock! ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Slip my finger in his anus. Apparently that'll make it droopy. " Wow publishing private conversations much?! ![]() | |||
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"Slip my finger in his anus. Apparently that'll make it droopy. Wow publishing private conversations much?! ![]() Keep your eyes on the stories forum. ![]() | |||
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"I have a good blue waffle pic that should do the job nicely...... ![]() ![]() Never remind me of that please haha! | |||
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"It's back - you all failed x" Have you been staring at yourself in the mirror again? ![]() | |||
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"It's back - you all failed x Have you been staring at yourself in the mirror again? ![]() I had a shower actually and got to soap up my body and look down at my girthy semi ![]() | |||
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"Well I have no particular argument with Bruce's erection but from a purely practical aspect a sharp smack with a garden trowel should do the trick." Kinky | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy." Awww. We can’t kick Brucey’s puppy ![]() ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy." They also both like being stroked! | |||
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"Well I have no particular argument with Bruce's erection but from a purely practical aspect a sharp smack with a garden trowel should do the trick." I don't know where the lines between killing my erection and mutilating my penis got blurred... ![]() | |||
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"Well I have no particular argument with Bruce's erection but from a purely practical aspect a sharp smack with a garden trowel should do the trick. Kinky " Well I was going to go with a shovel, but it seemed overkill.. | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked!" Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. | |||
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"Well I have no particular argument with Bruce's erection but from a purely practical aspect a sharp smack with a garden trowel should do the trick. I don't know where the lines between killing my erection and mutilating my penis got blurred... ![]() Long story short. I happen to know that a sharp smack with a policeman's truncheon destroys an erection instantly, but I only have a trowel to hand. No mutilation involved, but I can't promise it won't hurt like fuck. | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat." What if it's shaved first? | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat." Sweetheart ![]() ![]() | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. What if it's shaved first?" No. | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. Sweetheart ![]() ![]() Oh? What would I be thinking about? | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. Sweetheart ![]() ![]() Probably breathing, the make up running down your face, and how wet you are getting? | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. Sweetheart ![]() ![]() Ah, thoughts of self? It'd be odd not focusing on your reactions and seeing which of my favourite tricks work best for you, but I can do self if preferred I suppose. | |||
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"Oh. I don't think I'd want to kill Brucey's erection. It'd be like kicking a puppy. They also both like being stroked! Let's not link the two too hard sweetheart. I certainly don't want a golden retriever puppy in the back of my throat. Sweetheart ![]() ![]() I can focus on myself and the throat fucking and what works for me? | |||
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