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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38

There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I believe the tradition is that broken engagement - give it back. Divorce, keep it

But mileage and details may vary

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38

Let's take the value of the ring out of it ....same question as above.

It's got to sting more if there is a shed load if money invested in it.....hasn't it?

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I believe the tradition is that broken engagement - give it back. Divorce, keep it

But mileage and details may vary"

I think if someone had cheated in me then I'd probably want to throw it back at them!

In the other hand I may think fuck you, you're not having it.

If I'd broken it off I'd give it back.

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By *isionofdignityWoman
over a year ago

reading

Engagement rings are given in expectation of marriage (verbal contract) so if that does not happen then the ring goes back to the person who brought it . - that’s why I believe should happen

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic. "

Yes. I kind of think so too

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London


"I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic. "

Sounds a bit like he was trying to soothe his conscience!

I'd have assumed a woman would want to give it back rather than having a reminder hanging around (no matter who breaks it off), even if a pretty and expensive reminder?

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic. "

I'd definitely give it back if it was an heirloom

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

I suppose the true question is: who would be courteous enough to return it and who would be gracious enough to forsake it.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Engagement rings are given in expectation of marriage (verbal contract) so if that does not happen then the ring goes back to the person who brought it . - that’s why I believe should happen "

As Swing says...it is also tradition.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic.

Sounds a bit like he was trying to soothe his conscience!

I'd have assumed a woman would want to give it back rather than having a reminder hanging around (no matter who breaks it off), even if a pretty and expensive reminder?"

I think he was but I still liked the poetic way of putting it.

If my engagement ended I'd probably give it back. It would feel weird to keep it. Like a dress that no longer fits, hired from a fancy dress shop and never returned. It would be odd.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I suppose the true question is: who would be courteous enough to return it and who would be gracious enough to forsake it."

I'd like to think I'd have enough class to give it back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd give it back symbolically. Unless they screwed me in financial ways, I'd keep it as a collateral!

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By *ames250122Man
over a year ago

Worcester


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

If it was a family aireloom, then yeah I would want it back. Otherwise though, I wouldn’t expect or ask for it back. It was a gift meant for them that I wanted them to have so it’s entirely up them what they do with it xx

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I suppose the true question is: who would be courteous enough to return it and who would be gracious enough to forsake it."

Or, do the couple know each other well enough to know what's going to be best received, and is the split amicable enough that they can do right by each other?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give it back.

It holds no power over me then, or rather, the giver doesn't.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Port talbot

This is why poundland do rings

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe it’s customary for the ring to be returned to the fella.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is actually a law on this

If the engagement ends before a marriage takes place then the ring belongs to whoever purchased it

If tbe marriage goes ahead and ends in break up/ divorce then the recipient gets to keep the ring

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair


"I suppose the true question is: who would be courteous enough to return it and who would be gracious enough to forsake it.

I'd like to think I'd have enough class to give it back."

I agree.

Because if one (or both) parties have severed the betrothal, then that split surely has to be 'absolute': I'm letting you go in mind, body, soul...and tangible possessions. Cherry-picking has no place here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is why poundland do rings "

I always struggled to locate the cock rings. Thanks for confirm they still sell em

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I told my ex to chuck it in the bin.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I suppose the true question is: who would be courteous enough to return it and who would be gracious enough to forsake it.

I'd like to think I'd have enough class to give it back.

I agree.

Because if one (or both) parties have severed the betrothal, then that split surely has to be 'absolute': I'm letting you go in mind, body, soul...and tangible possessions. Cherry-picking has no place here."

Absolute, would be the only way for me.

Like you say... in body and in mind.

I am not one to hang onto the past.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back"

Can I ask do you still have them?

And well...if they didn't want then that that!

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"There is actually a law on this

If the engagement ends before a marriage takes place then the ring belongs to whoever purchased it

If tbe marriage goes ahead and ends in break up/ divorce then the recipient gets to keep the ring

"

Ah ok

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back"

Couldn't imagine being taken to court and forced to hand the ring over.

I wonder how many times that's happened!

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By *aughty treatsMan
over a year ago

tamworth

I wouldn’t expect it return if I cheated or had someone left them in a financial situation but other than that you’d would probably feel

It should be returned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back

Couldn't imagine being taken to court and forced to hand the ring over.

I wonder how many .

times that's happened!"

Watch judge Judy it happens all the time

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back

Can I ask do you still have them?

And well...if they didn't want then that that!"

I gave one each to my goddaughter and her sister and my eternity ring to the other sister. I kept my wedding ring but I have no idea where that went

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London


"I'd probably give it back if it was a heirloom.

One of my friends was told to keep hers because he said he didn't want to erase the past, just not build a future. I thought that was oddly romantic.

Sounds a bit like he was trying to soothe his conscience!

I'd have assumed a woman would want to give it back rather than having a reminder hanging around (no matter who breaks it off), even if a pretty and expensive reminder?

I think he was but I still liked the poetic way of putting it.

If my engagement ended I'd probably give it back. It would feel weird to keep it. Like a dress that no longer fits, hired from a fancy dress shop and never returned. It would be odd."

Yes, I agree - if you're going to break off an engagement, that's a nice way of putting it! Better than saying he's had a rethink and can't imagine spending the rest of his life married to her!

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I've been engaged three times including my ex husband. Kept two of things as they didn't want them back. The third took his back

Can I ask do you still have them?

And well...if they didn't want then that that!I gave one each to my goddaughter and her sister and my eternity ring to the other sister. I kept my wedding ring but I have no idea where that went"

My mom gave me her wedding ring after her and dad got divorced. I've no idea where it is now. It was a long time ago.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be. "

What if they had left you in ruins .... financial ruins?

Would you consider selling it then?

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World


"Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be.

What if they had left you in ruins .... financial ruins?

Would you consider selling it then?"

Still give it back personally

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be.

What if they had left you in ruins .... financial ruins?

Would you consider selling it then?

Still give it back personally "

Fair enough.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

The pawn broker.

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By *adbury girlWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

I have both my engagement and wedding ring but then was married for almost 20 years, split a decade ago.

I hate to part with my engagement ring as I really like it but obviously haven’t worn it in a very long time

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By *D of funCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

I sold mine and paid for a night out with a friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Engagement rings are given in expectation of marriage (verbal contract) so if that does not happen then the ring goes back to the person who brought it . - that’s why I believe should happen "

It should be returned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be. "

Especially if it's an heirloom.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me? She could keep it, I bought it for her not me.

If it was an heirloom, I’d expect it to be handed back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I call it off she can keep the ring

If she calls it off I expect the ring back

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By *aughty Couple ABCCouple
over a year ago

West Bromwich

I was engaged twice before I got married, the first one I kept and sold. The second one I gave back. Way over 35 years ago, so can't remember the price of them, but they'd both be around £100

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By *red333Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

If it was passed down through generations it goes back to the giver and if its an engagement then it should rightfully go back to the person who paid for it, i of course wouldn't care about that ring because I'm about the person not the trinket

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By *tourgentMan
over a year ago

Stourbridge

Saw it in half. Win win...

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By *weetkitten65Woman
over a year ago

Halifax

I'd give it back...

Don't want any reminder of the past...

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By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

I give presents back.

I hold memories with them, so every time I looked at it I'd be reminded of them. If they didn't want it back I'd sell it/charity shop it

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Its a conditional gift so should be handed back to the person who gifted it.

Personally I would expect it to be given back, irrespective of its financial value, due to what it actually meant to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A broken off engagement the ring should be returned.

He will have spent a decent amount on it but he’s been rejected so return his property.

If he’s cheated on you then it’s just spite that might make you keep it and for what? Sell it at a pawn shop?

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

I kept both my engagement rings. They were selected for me, given to me. There were no “if’s and buts”.

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

My ex kept hers.

I told her in conversation that I still had the box and r the servicing book in the hope that she would say ah yes I will give it back.

She just turned up one day when I was out and took the box as well.

Alls fair in love and war.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this in reference to the Maya Jama debacle?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it depend who did the breaking?

I would say the person breaking the engagement should give the ring to the other person

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich


"Give it back.....

If you have no interest in marrying the person anymore why would you want to keep it?

Keeping the ring just to sell it possibly or keep it out of spite type reasons and cash in is just knobbish behaviour in my opinion .

Give back, clean break everyone's as happy as they can be.

What if they had left you in ruins .... financial ruins?

Would you consider selling it then?"

Pawn it, give them the ticket and tell them they can redeem it out of the money they owe you

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I wouldn't want the ring so I'd give it back.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Who bought the ring ?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

I read about half of the replies and most imply a hetero relationship with lots of 'he' being thrown in ...... so I guess it's also implied that the 'he' bought a ring and the 'she' wears it .....

Funny old tradition.

Anyway ...... regardless of who bought what ... A ring purchased as an indentification that an engagement to be married has been entered into should be given back to whoever purchased it.

To my mind....... if people are so bloody equal rights minded they should BOTH have a ring of engagement and BOTH have contributed financially OR just bought their own OR just not have rings..... there are other things to buy.

BUT..... if the engagement stops give the ring back ffs....

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

It should go back to the person who gave it. That seems pretty clear to me.

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By *red333Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Does it depend who did the breaking?

I would say the person breaking the engagement should give the ring to the other person "

i agree if the other person was the buyer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can’t imagine ever wanting to keep a ring from someone who gave it to me in promise of marriage but who I’m no longer going to marry ?

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By *red333Man
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I read about half of the replies and most imply a hetero relationship with lots of 'he' being thrown in ...... so I guess it's also implied that the 'he' bought a ring and the 'she' wears it .....

Funny old tradition.

Anyway ...... regardless of who bought what ... A ring purchased as an indentification that an engagement to be married has been entered into should be given back to whoever purchased it.

To my mind....... if people are so bloody equal rights minded they should BOTH have a ring of engagement and BOTH have contributed financially OR just bought their own OR just not have rings..... there are other things to buy.

BUT..... if the engagement stops give the ring back ffs.... "

I vote for...... Lets not get married..... Marriage in most cases these days only lasts 10 years tops, some don't even manage that

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I reckon most would keep it to sell at a pawnbrokers.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

Depends.

If the ring has significant monetary or emotional value to one party over the other... Then I'd say they should have it.

If it's just going to sit in a drawer and then sold for scrap value to pay for a weekend away... Well may as well be put to better use.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

I gave all the family jewellery back when I got divorced. I didn't want it

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

I would tell my ex to keep it then have her arrested for theft after telling the police that we weren’t ever engaged and she was a fruit loop and the ring was my mothers that she had nicked. Id also run up credit card bills in her name that i wouldn’t pay and ruin her credit history. Cut up all her clothes ( even in her own house) and have 3 tons of horse shit dumped on her neighbours drive with a note from her saying - now keep the fucking noise down!! Signed Stacy ( or whatever her name was!) I’d also email a painter and decorator to paint her house ‘slut red’ from a fake account with her name. Hmmmmm think that’s about it!!

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By *jorkishMan
over a year ago

Seaforth

If the girl cheated then she should give it back especially if it was a family heirloom

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"I would tell my ex to keep it then have her arrested for theft after telling the police that we weren’t ever engaged and she was a fruit loop and the ring was my mothers that she had nicked. Id also run up credit card bills in her name that i wouldn’t pay and ruin her credit history. Cut up all her clothes ( even in her own house) and have 3 tons of horse shit dumped on her neighbours drive with a note from her saying - now keep the fucking noise down!! Signed Stacy ( or whatever her name was!) I’d also email a painter and decorator to paint her house ‘slut red’ from a fake account with her name. Hmmmmm think that’s about it!! "

The car escaped lightly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

Traditionally, if he breaks the engagement, she keeps the ring. If she breaks it, he gets it back

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle


"I would tell my ex to keep it then have her arrested for theft after telling the police that we weren’t ever engaged and she was a fruit loop and the ring was my mothers that she had nicked. Id also run up credit card bills in her name that i wouldn’t pay and ruin her credit history. Cut up all her clothes ( even in her own house) and have 3 tons of horse shit dumped on her neighbours drive with a note from her saying - now keep the fucking noise down!! Signed Stacy ( or whatever her name was!) I’d also email a painter and decorator to paint her house ‘slut red’ from a fake account with her name. Hmmmmm think that’s about it!!

The car escaped lightly "

Oh that caught fire ages ago!!! Electrical fault… apparently

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

During preganancy her fingers swelled up and I had to cut one of her rings, so she could get it off same thing they would have done at hospital.

She cut my engagement ring to her, into 3 pieces worth total scrap value.

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By *ayleePhoenixTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

It is more dignified and classy to give the ring back.

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath

Iv been engaged before. He actually bought me 2 different engagement rings. A traditional one and then a ring I seen that I liked.

I still have the rings. They are mine. I plan to give them to our daughter one day when she’s old enough.

My auntie was also engaged 3 times in her life before she married. She kept all 3 engagement rings. I actually have 2 of those as well.

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

Funny enough there is a courtroom video on YouTube about this very situation lol.

I say you give the ring back if you break up! Some ladies may protest but if the roles where reversed & they had to buy the guy say Patek Philippe watch for engagement I’m pretty sure they would wanted it back

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

This happened to me, I gave it back. Why should I have it, plus it would always be like an anchor to that person. Give it back and move on

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath

Or one day I might sell them and take the kids to Disneyland Paris again.

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

My ex still wears it

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I had hers custom made, I told her to keep it as it would only be a reminder

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or one day I might sell them and take the kids to Disneyland Paris again. "

Do it

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath


"Or one day I might sell them and take the kids to Disneyland Paris again.

Do it "

Seriously considering it, my kids want to go back anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or one day I might sell them and take the kids to Disneyland Paris again.

Do it

Seriously considering it, my kids want to go back anyway. "

Ahh, I definitely would then

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By *eviants In DefianceCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone

If it was an heirloom, I'd give it back, if not possibly throw it at their head depending on the situation. I kept both of mine personally, I was never asked for them back.

Pxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you aren't married then I'd give it back. After marriage it's yours to do as you wish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep, I'm not giving any bling back...snooze you lose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's been an engagement with a beautiful expensive engagement ring.

The engagement has now been broken off.

My question is .....

Who gets the beautiful expensive ring?

Maybe it was a ring passed down through the generations, who would it now belong to?

Guys/gals would you expect it to be given back?

Would you give it back?"

Was given with love at that very moment

Either keep ,pop it in a box and it’s a memory of the happy times

Give it back and its journey ‘may’ go on to the different person ,or perhaps stay within the family

Tricky one….mind ,heart or gut feeling …

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

I would return it. It was given as a statement of love and intention, if neither was there I would return it.

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By *mooth shaftMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Keep it. BTW if anyone wants to marry me ..

. again I buy 10k engagement rings minimum

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath


"Keep it. BTW if anyone wants to marry me ..

. again I buy 10k engagement rings minimum "

I think I could get a trip to Disney world florida with that instead of Paris

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Return it.

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By *ryandseeMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

The decent thing to do imo, especially if it's family heirloom, is to return it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm, legally I think a person can keep a gift...

Morally? I'd return a family ring.

Although the idea of wearing someone else's ring gives me the heebie jeebies so that'd not happen with me in the first place. I'd rather do without a ring

If it ended badly and I wanted something good to come from bad? I'd sell it and donate the proceeds to a good cause

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I've never been engaged but I think I would give the ring back in that situation.The engagement is over so I wouldn't want to keep it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I separated I gave back the rings and all the jewellery my husband and his family gifted me.

They belonged in the past not my future.

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"My ex kept hers.

I told her in conversation that I still had the box and r the servicing book in the hope that she would say ah yes I will give it back.

She just turned up one day when I was out and took the box as well.

Alls fair in love and war. "

Forget the ring you should have got the keys back!

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By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38

Right anyone with a ring they don't know what to do with ...pass them my way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Right anyone with a ring they don't know what to do with ...pass them my way "

Only if its squeaky clean, mind!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Right anyone with a ring they don't know what to do with ...pass them my way "

T

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

It's a gift isn't it!! Would you give back every gift over the time of the relationship.

Moral of the story is don't give a heirloom as an engagement ring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh this is a good question..

Who broke the e gagement off.. if it was the original ring giver they don't get it back out of sheer spite

Ring receiver returnas a sign of respect for someone you omce loved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex traded mine for a girly trip to New York and a pair of $1,000 dollar shoes... and good on her

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