FabSwingers.com forum: 4,000 words

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.

I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.

I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?

I'll start with "disloyalty".

Let's do some soul cleansing.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

Heartbroken

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Loneliness.

I hope I die before my husband as I couldn't cope with the loneliness.

Ruby

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Helplessness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Overlooked

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Disrespected

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Grief

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Loneliness.

I hope I die before my husband as I couldn't cope with the loneliness.

Ruby"

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By *ritIndianCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Betrayed

Mrs

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it."

Valid point too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The desolation I felt following my younger brothers suicide.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Rage.

I don’t like who I become when I am full of rage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rage.

I don’t like who I become when I am full of rage."

The loss of control ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.

I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.

I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?

I'll start with "disloyalty".

Let's do some soul cleansing.

I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"Rage.

I don’t like who I become when I am full of rage.

The loss of control ? "

Quite the apposite. I become quite determined and don’t care who I hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over ."

You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorrow.

I am living with it now, and I know there will be a time it will happen again with someone else I care deeply for. I don't think it gets any worse than sorrow.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.

I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?

I'll start with "disloyalty".

Let's do some soul cleansing.

I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling. "

The emotions caused by it are specific to me and not ones I I to pour out; I am not an emotional exhibitionist.

I could write feeling sad or betrayed due to disloyalty but I didn't. To break it down for you: 'I do not want to endure feelings caused by someone being disloyal to me'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .

You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief. "

If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

Numb

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Despair

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .

You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief.

If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted "

I see clearly. I also see clearly his example. Which you omitted.

Oh dear. I have nothing to offer you. Definitely not an apology

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.

I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?

I'll start with "disloyalty".

Let's do some soul cleansing.

I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling.

The emotions caused by it are specific to me and not ones I I to pour out; I am not an emotional exhibitionist.

I could write feeling sad or betrayed due to disloyalty but I didn't. To break it down for you: 'I do not want to endure feelings caused by someone being disloyal to me'."

To help me understand a little better. Because the feelings of disloyalty can include : loss (of friendship), being cheated upon, being lied to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .

You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief.

If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted

I see clearly. I also see clearly his example. Which you omitted.

Oh dear. I have nothing to offer you. Definitely not an apology

You’re welcome to remain wrong.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorrow.

I am living with it now, and I know there will be a time it will happen again with someone else I care deeply for. I don't think it gets any worse than sorrow."

Hugs LBC and everyone in a similar position.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unloved or underappreciated

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rage.

I don’t like who I become when I am full of rage.

The loss of control ?

Quite the apposite. I become quite determined and don’t care who I hurt.

I always value your raw honesty when it comes to self analysing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more. "

Unsafe. How could I forget that.

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By *astandtheCurious2Couple
over a year ago

letchworth

Dead inside, hopelessness

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Overlooked"

I would feel very bad overlooking this particular comment!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.

Unsafe. How could I forget that. "

Hope you are ok x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolute hoplessness.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.

Unsafe. How could I forget that.

Hope you are ok x"

Ah thats kind. Yes

I haven't felt safer in a long time. Building good boundaries helped. And you too.. its a powerful list.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rejection"

Sucks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.

Unsafe. How could I forget that.

Hope you are ok x

Ah thats kind. Yes

I haven't felt safer in a long time. Building good boundaries helped. And you too.. its a powerful list. "
. Feel free to PM x

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

Rumination

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Numb"

Love this response. Well, not that you've felt that, it's an awful feeling. Lack of. I'd probably say numbness is the worst for me.

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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

I'm not sure if I would want or not want to be it, again.... But emotionless... I quite liked it tbh

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not sure if I would want or not want to be it, again.... But emotionless... I quite liked it tbh"

Do you want to elaborate ? I'm curious. Is it about not dealing with too much ? Easier if there is little going on in feelings department and you detach yourself a little ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rumination "

That can be distressing.

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By *empest2KMan
over a year ago

Derby

I wish I didn't have to feel envy again, as it has been a massive blocker to potentially enjoyable experiences in my life. It's the one thing I would get rid of without hesitation

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

"Rumination

That can be distressing. "

Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I wish I didn't have to feel envy again, as it has been a massive blocker to potentially enjoyable experiences in my life. It's the one thing I would get rid of without hesitation

Envy is just one of the emotions we go through. It's not as self destructive as jealousy I feel. Sometimes can be motivating too? I am sorry you feel it blocked you from enjoying things. Do you think it will ever change ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rumination

That can be distressing.

Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.

Letting go is an art indeed. Or maybe not art.. hard learnt skill? You can get attached to replaying those scenarios so much that as you said you can't enjoy Today. Maybe it's worth thinking of forgiving oneself ?

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Hmm had a ponder over this one, and despite not wanting to feel helpless or scared or anything like that again. I'm kinda ok with it if I do. That only thing I never want to feel again is nothing, to feel is to be alive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bereft of everything

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"Hmm had a ponder over this one, and despite not wanting to feel helpless or scared or anything like that again. I'm kinda ok with it if I do. That only thing I never want to feel again is nothing, to feel is to be alive. "

As above. I spent an entire year completely shut down and not feeling anything.

When that broke and all the negative feelings surged it felt amazing to feel anything at all. The positive ones that came later were better of course.

So another vote for the worst being to feel nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Grief

Unfortunately that is part of life and unavoidable, hopefully I’ll handle it better when it next comes along

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Destroyed. The feeling of not knowing if all your broken pieces will ever be put back together again.

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Valid point too.

I disagree.

If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over ."

It makes me focus on loving and appreciating the people that are still with me.

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

"Rumination

That can be distressing.

Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.

I completely agree and it’s a skill I haven’t learned! I find that talking about things really helps me compartmentalise them. Can’t wait to get home to Oxfordshire/Surrey to see friends again!

This wonderful, supportive, funny, friendly community on fab helps

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Helplessness

Whilst I grieved for my grandchild watching my child grieve for her son

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I hate feeling guilty, but it is absolutely bred in the bone by now. I can't destroy it without destroying me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bereft, abandoned, lonely, distrustful, cynical.

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