FabSwingers.com forum: Interest lists..whats the point

By *westUKguy OP Man
over a year ago

Southport

Is there any point to interest lists on profiles,..for example i read profiles and message people about certain likes on their list...95% dont reply other 5% havent really participated in that particular thing..so why bother

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Pretty sure they only exist so blokes profiles aren't completely empty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If 95% don’t reply maybe they aren’t the problem.

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Is there any point to interest lists on profiles,..for example i read profiles and message people about certain likes on their list...95% dont reply other 5% havent really participated in that particular thing..so why bother"

Attraction can begin with a "list".

Then it progresses to reading a profile, looking at the pictures and only then, reading the message.

Rules of attraction. Just because we've ticked the same boxes is no guarantee of a reply, let alone a fuck.

I don't understand what people don't understand about attraction. *shrugs

Winston

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By *westUKguy OP Man
over a year ago

Southport

Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I don't think it's their list picking there not replying to.

Lack of any pics, I'd not reply even if it was the best message ever.

Mrs

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess"

Where was the pouncing?

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess

Where was the pouncing?"

I'm waiting on my bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally don't think it's worth it. I can tick a box on rimming but it doesn't explain why I ticked it. I don't like it but i enjoy doing it on a trusted partner. But then if i get messaged asking me on it, I don't reply lol coz it's, for me, something I wouldn't answer on the first few messages. So it's a moot thing for me

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I'm guessing they aren't interested in you and that's why you aren't getting a reply, just move on

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By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess"

Isn’t it funny how on these forums, despite everyone reacts and gives constructive criticism, there’s always one OP who isn’t happy with the feedback because he/she doesn’t like the answers?

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

My interests are not a list of things I'm willing to indulge in with any randomer.

They are things I'm open to exploring with someone once I've gotten to know them.

In saying that, I can't remember the last time I actually looked at someone's interests because even back when I was sending messages they were never related to interests and much more about the persons own words in their bio rather than options offered by the site.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess"

There is no issue.

We have interests listed. It doesn't mean we'd look to do them with everyone that asks, anyone that messages or people that share similar interests at all.

Especially if we can't see what those people look like, their profiles don't contain enough words to tell us much about them and if there's anything else in their profile that would have us running for the proverbial hills.

An interest is just that - an interest. Not a reason anyone is obliged to engage in conversation.

Those who assume otherwise just show the type of people they are I guess........

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"Where was the pouncing?

I'm waiting on my bed

How patient are you?

I might have long legs but 200 miles is still going to take a while

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"Where was the pouncing?

I'm waiting on my bed

How patient are you?

I might have long legs but 200 miles is still going to take a while

Hire a helicopter, I want action, not excuses

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By *altyMouthsCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeen

We have some interests one of us is into and others both are into, so compiling our interest list was tricky.

The other danger is that ticking almost all, is misread as having ticked all lazy fashion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/01/23 14:11:25]

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Having a tick on a list doesn't mean that person wants to do it with anyone who sees the tick and they're into it too.

A reply would be nice, to say no thank you, but it's not compulsory on here.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

The point of them for me is to look to see if they have any ticked, and decide whether to chat or not.

If someone is into something I'm not then I'll discount them immediately.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

" How patient are you?

I might have long legs but 200 miles is still going to take a while

Hire a helicopter, I want action, not excuses

Oh.

I like when you're demanding

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

" How patient are you?

I might have long legs but 200 miles is still going to take a while

Hire a helicopter, I want action, not excuses

Oh.

I like when you're demanding

That's why we get on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So I know I won’t be stuck doing missionary all night

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By *illynillyCouple
over a year ago

Wiltshire

We barely have anything on our interest list, did have a few however a lot of men instantly target 1...for example, "so you like it up the arse, so bagsy having your arse, I ll pound it"

Well, just gets boring

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By *altyMouthsCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"The point of them for me is to look to see if they have any ticked, and decide whether to chat or not.

If someone is into something I'm not then I'll discount them immediately. "

I don't think the interest list is meant as a prerequisite for every meet. Ours certainly isn't. It would be understandable if say bareback were an interest option, because that can affect someone's overall view of a user. Simply because the user might be interested in taking photos, wouldn't necessarily mean every single meet would need to be documented like some kind of National Geographic anthropological centre spread.

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess"

None of the 3 posts prior to this one "pounced".

None of the posts after this one "pounced".

Winston

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"Isnt it funny on most of these forums nobody ever reacts or replies constructively about the issue..they always pounce on the OP , shows the type of people they are i guess"

And what is your issue really? People might tick that because it’s an interest not because they have done it. Or are you just upset no one’s replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can see what sort of a kinky bugger you are dealing with. I like discerning though, not just everything ticked. I presume you will still have to appeal physically though, there's a lot if people out there like the same things!

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

95% don't reply regardless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If 95% don’t reply maybe they aren’t the problem."

Miss S x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The interests list became a massive ball ache for me. There is a surprising number on here for whom the interests are their absolute sole focus. There’s no desire to connect with me on any other level, just do I want oral sex and then they leave?

Twenty times a day - do I want phone sex from someone 300 miles away?

So I got rid of all of them.

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By *rnypairCouple
over a year ago

south Yorkshire

Sharing the same interests is irrelevant if you don’t have a decent profile and send a message worth replying to.

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

"Pretty sure they only exist so blokes profiles aren't completely empty."

Oi! Cheeky sod!

I didn’t construct an overly long semi-coherent load of rambling waffle bollocks for people to ignore, just to be insulted

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Most people need more than just a shared sexual interest to encourage them to respond to a message. Loads of people will instantly delete your message based on the fact you have no profile pic. I would start with having a profile pic and a selection of public pics to see if they have any interest or attraction to YOU first, before they even bother to look at your shared interests

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Likes lists are not a shopping list that mean a profile will always do them with everyone, but they can be useful when messaging to build up rapport.

Not everyone uses them the same way. Some tick everything, some also interpret them differently.

I used to only look for people into SM, as it helped narrow search criteria.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Having something ticked doesn't mean it's now contractually agreed that you want to do it with everyone and a lot aren't clear if it's giving or receiving.

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"If 95% don’t reply maybe they aren’t the problem."
Its the 5% that are the problem?

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By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

Op you understand this is a swinging site, not a book-a-session site, right? Like the people here get to choose for themselves without feeling obligated to anyone, it’s a theme we try hard to keep up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I deliberately have no interests ticked, it’s often seen as a checklist, something that’s expected and ticked off during a meet… far from it, I prefer to live in the moment, what might be right in one meet won’t work in another so leave it blank, it can also put people off if there is something they hate, I know a lot of woman who see an interest in anal as potentially having someone transfixed on that as end goal not the journey to get there and they can’t relax being nagged about it. go with the flow!

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By *obyn GravesTV/TS
over a year ago

1127 walnut avenue

I got rid of all mine after someone contacted me wanting me to piss on them..I thought water sports meant Canoeing..

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Most people are not mutually compatible with most other people, even if they are the right gender or have shared interests, where the ticks match.

It's an interesting question OP but I fear your expectations may be a wee bit different to reality.

People's preferences are where it's at and they are far more nuanced than a list of - possible - interests.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Sign of potential compatibility. Not a checklist.

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth

Did my head in getting random messages about anal or watersports, so took them off even though they're things me and Mr Fox do together.

As others have said, they're interests not services folks are offering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where do I sign your list ?

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

"The interests list became a massive ball ache for me. There is a surprising number on here for whom the interests are their absolute sole focus. There’s no desire to connect with me on any other level, just do I want oral sex and then they leave?

Twenty times a day - do I want phone sex from someone 300 miles away?

So I got rid of all of them."

I had the same experience of them. Even with people where I'd chatted for a while and then met up for a social there was an assumption that if I had something ticked as an interest then I'd DEFINITELY do it with them because I've ticked the box to say I want to. Apparently it meant I wanted to do whatever one interest they were focused on all day, every day, to the exclusion of everything else, with anyone who asked.

Easier to do without them and establish mutual interests through conversations with those whose profiles tickle my fancy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I got rid of all mine after someone contacted me wanting me to piss on them..I thought water sports meant Canoeing..

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

The list is there to show we are interested in those activities, with the right people. The right people being the key words…

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"The list is there to show we are interested in those activities, with the right people. The right people being the key words…

K"
you can't be any further right than me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did my head in getting random messages about anal or watersports, so took them off even though they're things me and Mr Fox do together.

As others have said, they're interests not services folks are offering"

!!!

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