FabSwingers.com forum: Some men become jealous when another man so much as looks at his partner

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Do it take a special type of couple to become swingers and continue living the lifestyle?

And how did you decide to get into it?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Jealousy is an odd one. It hits everyone differently.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

With a totally vanilla head on, I don’t want people staring at my GF suggestively.

With my filth head on, I love her getting attention…

Vanilla head doesn’t get used much at all now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s the twinge of jealousy that drives it for me

I want to watch my boyfriend fuck someone else

But then I want to take him home and ride him like I stole him and make him forget all about them

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Jealousy is an odd one. It hits everyone differently."

Yes. I also don't think it's always a negative thing. Or a big one. How it's handled by both parties is the most important thing isn't it? If it becomes weaponised, that's not healthy.

I sometimes get little flutters of that sort of feeling. Not sure if I'd apply jealousy to it because it's such an umbrella term for a wealth of emotions. But, I think, that with those I'm dating we're mature enough to discuss it, openly and without fear. Sometimes it's good to not voice it and just sit with it though. Realise it's not a permanent feeling.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I enjoy getting jealous!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

jealousy Has no place in the swinging world

It’s how things can turn nasty

Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life

And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty

There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening

Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world

It’s how things can turn nasty

Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life

And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty

There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening

Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Whoah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex husband was pathologically jealous

It destroyed our relationship

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" jealousyHas no place in the swinging world

It’s how things can turn nasty

Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life

And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty

There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening

Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Whoah

Yip it’s things like that. That happing could turn people away for life hence why jealousy has no place in this world

If you feel the slightest bit off jealousy at all then this world isn’t for you

Your just putting other fun at risk and could crate a dangerous situation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jealousy is an odd one. It hits everyone differently."

Exactly, I used to feel jealousy and excitement at the same time

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By *glyBettyTV/TS
over a year ago

About 3 feet away from the fence

"Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Good god. How did you react?

I don't think I would have been able to keep my composure.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"It’s the twinge of jealousy that drives it for me

I want to watch my boyfriend fuck someone else

But then I want to take him home and ride him like I stole him and make him forget all about them "

Great recovery sex then?

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

There’s no room for jealousy in the swinging world and there’s a big difference between sex and love .. as a couple it should be about adding a little extra if there is jealousy then maybe you shouldn’t be here ..

Although that I guess a little bit is human nature I can remember tappin my ex in the shoulder when I thought he had been fucking someone else for a bit too long and saying my fukkin turn now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Good god. How did you react?

I don't think I would have been able to keep my composure."

Wasn’t me it was someone else who posted it round a year and hafe ago

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world

It’s how things can turn nasty

Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life

And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty

There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening

Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Least it wasn’t a donkey punch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world

It’s how things can turn nasty

Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life

And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty

There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening

Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it

Least it wasn’t a donkey punch "

Oooo god nope think I would flip if a guy done that one ha ha

I mean yes I am in to a light bit being slapped in the face with the right person but when I say light I mean light ha ha

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

jealousy has no place in this lifestyle as a couple you should be so in tune with each other and open with each other ... ie to swing as a couple you have a very strong relationship .. if not this lifestyle will rip you apart fast or slowly

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

More women get jealous than men. The possession drive is high, even in the swinging world.

There is a reason why mfm is more popular than fmf, takes a very special couple Indeed to share a husband, without her trying to get all of his attention. Or becoming stroppy because he is enjoying another women "too much".

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By *oly Fuck Sticks BatmanCouple
over a year ago

here & there

Jealousy is a natural response - it’s often the little things that trigger a reaction with us, but as others have said it’s all about how you handle that emotion.

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

Jealousy is one thing....but lashing out is another.

Anyone who feels jealousy that intensely should admit to themselves that there's nothing for them in the swinging scene, and bow out gracefully.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Jealous swingers are pants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s a strange one. If we are out in the pub my husband wouldn’t like it if I was getting chatted up not so much as jealous just a time and place for it.

But when we are at a club he loves the attention I get. The sex for us afterwards is always amazing

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Yes I definitely think it does. I couldn’t do it.

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

I've seen jealousy erupt in a club one night the two guys naked beat the crap out of each other lol

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Jealous swingers are pants

I miss Rex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In day to day life I get jealous if someone oversteps the mark, with my naughty head on, no way, flirt and touch the Mr all you want

Mrs

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Jealousy is totally natural it's how you handle it that counts communication is key.

I enjoy seeing the Mr with another woman, I think the only thing I couldn't handle would be an emotional connection, sex is sex to me, we both enjoy it and share that enjoyment with others.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird..."

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would. "

Each to their own

Big difference between sex and love !!!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.

Each to their own

Big difference between sex and love !!! "

Absolutely there is. Which is totally my point.

A fwb, no problem. Someone I love, no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something I'm very cautious about. As much as I'm turned on by the idea, I don't know how I'll feel if/when I see Silver with another woman...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are, believe it or not, people on here who will chat to you for a while and then get jealous if they see you chatting to others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always found it a turn on if other people fancy the guy I'm with.

Even if love and all that shit is involved, still hot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think jealousy is a perfectly valid emotion and addressing it is probably healthier than pretending it doesn't exist . As a single person I've experienced it and it'd not an issue.

I think it must take an incredibly strong relationship to enter this lifestyle as a couple and I admire people who have that.

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

I got into it with my partner because we fantasised about it and then we decided to do it.

We had really good open communication, which definitely helped.

Jealousy just gave way to compersion.

The emotional connection aspect is the bit that's challenging, I reckon. Sharing love is very different to sharing sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think jealousy is always a bad thing, it can teach us things about ourselves and our relationships if we choose look at the reasons behind it. In past relationships, pre-swinging, I've had pangs when a relationship isn't secure, when I've not been getting what I need from it. I've had pangs when the relationship is secure, but I've had low self-esteem and feel inferior. Both situations were big motivators to pull my big girl pants up and make changes.

Now, when I see my partner with someone else, I feel joyful. Is that weird? I think it might be weird

. And mightily turned on. Anyway, I adore it, for whatever reason.

Nell

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

[Removed by poster at 06/04/23 10:46:38]

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"I don't think jealousy is always a bad thing, it can teach us things about ourselves and our relationships if we choose look at the reasons behind it. In past relationships, pre-swinging, I've had pangs when a relationship isn't secure, when I've not been getting what I need from it. I've had pangs when the relationship is secure, but I've had low self-esteem and feel inferior. Both situations were big motivators to pull my big girl pants up and make changes.

Now, when I see my partner with someone else, I feel joyful. Is that weird? I think it might be weird

. And mightily turned on. Anyway, I adore it, for whatever reason.

Nell

That sounds so familiar!

See now I feel a little envy at your relationship because I lost my partner.

But I am grinning like a Cheshire cat because I am really happy for you.

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By *antasy Explorers 1313Couple
over a year ago

A place where others reside (nr Oxford)

It's an emotion and controlling those emotions can be very difficult. What some people struggle with is balancing that emotion. That's why you need to communicate. Where it sometimes breaks down is a lack of fairness or perceived fairness. We play with men because that pang of jealousy turns me on and I can control it. We don't play with women because D doesn't like seeing me be intimate with others which is fine.

We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.

He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.

They're definitely not swingers

They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"It's an emotion and controlling those emotions can be very difficult. What some people struggle with is balancing that emotion. That's why you need to communicate. Where it sometimes breaks down is a lack of fairness or perceived fairness. We play with men because that pang of jealousy turns me on and I can control it. We don't play with women because D doesn't like seeing me be intimate with others which is fine.

We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.

He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.

They're definitely not swingers

They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it. "

The emotional maturity to cope with being a swinger.

Love how we really do all look at things so differently. The beauty of forums, opinions and conversations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My ex husband was pathologically jealous

It destroyed our relationship "

I know the feeling too, if the partner feeling jealous doesn't address it and even worse blame you instead, there's nothing you can do

Retroactive jealousy and relationship obsessive compulsive disorder can be very toxic and destructive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

F asked, we agreed on terms and flexibility etc, first MMF nearly broke my mind which is why we'll never look for a single guy unless he wants to help me explore my bi side which is difficult cause I don't always fancy that kind of thing. She now wants to explore with a woman more and as odd as it sounds I don't get any sexual gratification from watching her with a man, woman or other. Nor do I have any desire to sleep with other people currently

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By *antasy Explorers 1313Couple
over a year ago

A place where others reside (nr Oxford)

"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

Cheers for the lecture Pops but if you take a wander back through the comment you'll find that actually what I said was the different emotional responses to simply going out for a drink with a member of the opposite sex makes it difficult to imagine they would entertain the world of ethical non monogamy, swinging and sharing partners.

I didn't one up anyone, I didn't say anyone was more special.

They're our closest friends and we love them dearly.

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By *antasy Explorers 1313Couple
over a year ago

A place where others reside (nr Oxford)

"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed. "

Thanks for joining in though.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed.

Thanks for joining in though. "

No problem at all.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I was lucky that i met my partner jack on fab almost 7.5 years ago.

We both decided we wanted to stay in the lifestyle.

There's not been any jealousy on either side.

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By *otBrunetteHimCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

All down to the level of respect for me. Have no problem if someone finds Mrs attractive but if they were to sit staring and make her feel uncomfortable then it would.

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

I’m getting jealous right now.

I think it’s because it’s stopped raining and the sun is out

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By *haron StonerTV/TS
over a year ago

Haywards Heath

I make everybody jealous. I'm not even having sex with them and they get jealous if I turn my attention elsewhere.

Girls just stop talking to me if they get a whiff of someone elses affections. Or if I don't play up to them.

Guys just end up wanting to fuck me not knowing why but get jealous of my partner because 'they' must be gettn it and they're not.

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By *ustus555Couple
over a year ago

NG 21

We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.

He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.

They're definitely not swingers

They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it. "

Nearly spat my tea out at this. We have some very close lifelong friends exactly like this.

Whenever we go out separately they question us as to why we don't get jealous. I'll be diplomatic, where as mick just says. " grow up"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's an odd one

I am not jealous of physical exchanges

However, I react badly to emotional infidelity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!

Your wording is atrocious.

A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.

Cheers for the lecture Pops… "

You are welcome.

Thanks for the Pops remark.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I thought my husband was dating another woman and giving her quality time and sharing emotions, that would really bother me. I know he would never do that though.

To share him sexually, no jealousy issues at all. It's purely hot, horny and exciting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would. "

Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.

Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever."

You don't need to understand it though. It isn't wrong to feel that way, as it isn't wrong to feel the way you feel.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?

People are weird...

Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.

I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.

Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever."

Don’t be sorry. We’re all different. Which is a good thing, be boring if we were all the same.

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By *rancois Du BoisMan
over a year ago

Down the back of the sofa.

I actually have a cheating fetish. If Kitty told me she’d fucked someone on a night out or at work I’d be so turned on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I actually have a cheating fetish. If Kitty told me she’d fucked someone on a night out or at work I’d be so turned on! "

This

I actually want Autumn to go on a night out, come home all dishevelled but insist nothing happened. Then later in the week I hear from her pal that she got snu snu.

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
over a year ago

All over the place

Lots of variables, I think to get angry over look means you Re very angry and insecure

Touching however is a reason for violence lol

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"I've seen jealousy erupt in a club one night the two guys naked beat the crap out of each other lol

"
really why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not a jealous person - unless I’m in the luteal phase of my menstrual cycle

In fact I have no interest in swinging / sharing my husband in these two weeks (probably about a week and half )

The two weeks before ovulation though ……

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I can't imagine being in previous a relationship and saying.. "go on babe have sex with John"

I just can't imagine doing it and I guess the reaction would he a bad one. On the other hand if I met someone who was already into it, I would encourage it. Just not anyone who I've been with.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I don't have jealousy, neither did my partner. We met when we where both having sex with others. I've had guys do things to make me jealous but it just washes over me

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's not just men OP.

I sometimes notice a guy, only for my interest to be noticed by a woman he's with, who will typically pull him in tightly, to assert her claim.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's not just men OP.

I sometimes notice a guy, only for my interest to be noticed by a woman he's with, who will typically pull him in tightly, to assert her claim.

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By *unnybunny1000Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

My hubby hates men approaching me or talking to me, but will happily watch me have sex with others

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